Oct 16, 2012 at 05:34PM EDT
“…in a comparison between complementary couples and similar couples, who has the greater chance of “making it?”
Easily, couples who are more like each other are more likely to stick together and be happy with the relationship. There’s a(n old) book by a Zick Rubin called “Liking and Loving.” That’s where I first read it, but I’ve found it to be true in current literature as well. Although the differences between people may be attractive to others at first, more often than not, it will create stress and conflict over the course of the relationship. I can’t say it’s bound to fail, but I wouldn’t bet on it being a successful and happy marriage or long-term relationship, even if they don’t break-up/get a divorce.
It is my thinking that complementary relationships may have an aspect of “need” to them that isn’t unique to romantic relationships. If that need is met by other means and the relationship has a strong foundation in that now fulfilled need, then the relationship becomes less of a priority.
I think the most successful romantic relationships are based upon emotional needs, but not psychological or structural needs.
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