Apr 04, 2013 at 04:44PM EDT
I don’t see my friends anymore as they’re all either still at school or have moved on way away from me. My best friend went to New York for his PhD, and I hardly even hear from him but once a week anymore. All my other friends I only keep in touch with through texting, Skype or Facebook. I only have any real interaction with my parents on a day-to-day basis. And even then they’re so busy taking care of my sick grandfather that I’m starting to hardly see them too.
This weekend will really test me as my parents are going alone on a trip to North Carolina as of Friday morning and leaving me at home with no one but our seven animals to take care of. I’m already feeling so ridiculously alone and lacking in any form of passable social interaction that I can’t see this weekend being good to me at all. In fact, I’d be shocked if I didn’t sleep through all of it.
Basically, I feel really dumb but really helpless. I can’t find work, I’m not meeting new people, I’m not hanging out and doing normal things a twenty-three year old woman should be doing, and staying in touch with my friends from school is a lot harder than I want it to be. Even though I’m taking my anti-depressants and seeing a therapist every couple of weeks, I can still feel myself slipping without the social part of my life that I’m so used to having.
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