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KYMcon 2017 - The Universe's 2nd KYM-related Convention (Competition over)

Last posted Mar 04, 2017 at 10:06AM EST. Added Jan 20, 2017 at 06:14AM EST
25 posts from 15 users

KYMcon 2017
Also known as: The Three-Years-Too-Late Sequel to KYMcon 2014 That Literally Nobody Wanted, Needed or Asked For


OwO What's This?
KYMcon 2017 is a totally real meme convention, taking place once again in the Cheezburger Convention Centre (pronounced "KKK"), the same place it took place 3 years ago for KYMcon 2014.

After many unsuccessful attempts at using KYMconStarter (pronounced "Kickstarter") again to kickstart another KYMcon in 2015, funds were successfully raised on Patreon in 2016 just in time to make a KYMcon 2017. Don't believe me? See for yourself!

For a list of events and panels at KYMcon 2017, a timetable is linked at the bottom of this thread. Please hover your mouse over the names of the events and panels to read a note containing that event/panel's description.

All attendees are also given a bag of swag that has items related to some of the panels upon their arrival at the entry gates. Click here to read a list of the contents of the swag bag.


So… how is this a FORUM GAME?!

To celebrate 3 years of KYMcon, in this forum game, there are 3 categories which makes 9 different winners (gold, silver, bronze for each category)! The categories are:

  • Writing – Write a story, draw a comic, OR put together a diary/journal/scrapbook of your entire adventure at KYMcon 2017 and the surrounding hotels during the entire 3-day event.
    • If there is a panel in the timetable that you are somehow involved in, your story must involve you attending that panel as the host. For example, if there was a "NeonWabbit Explains Memes" panel at 19:00, I might write something like "It was getting close to 7:00 PM, so I had to rush over to the stage to give my talk about memes." into my story.
  • Designing – Draw one or more of the rooms of the KYMcon 2017 version of the Cheezburger Convention Centre with people having a good time and vendors selling stuff OR make a map of the floor plan of the Cheezburger Convention Centre.
  • Recording – Record your voice or film yourself (or a friend, or yourself and a bunch of your friends) acting out your own version of one of the panels or events at KYMcon 2017. You don't have to act out the entire actual time of the panel/event (for example, some panels are two hours long), but if you do, you may be highly considered for winning.

Anything else?

  • The nine winners of the above categories will get to choose 1 or 2 Steam keys for games that I have duplicates of on Humble Bundle. I won't write the names of the games until we have winners, but they're good ones with "Positive" or higher review scores on Steam.
    • To be eligible for the Steam keys, your KYM account must be older than ONE MONTH.
  • Entries to this competition can be of any quality, however you must stick to the timetable, and the "Writing" and "Recording" entries must be written from YOUR perspective, not from the perspective of an "Anonymous individual who chose KYMcon 2017 as his first convention," or something like that.
  • If you are unsure about something, please post any questions/comments/competition entries to this game in this thread.
  • Before you say "Won't you cancel this project like you cancel all your other KYM projects?", there is nothing more for me to do with this thread except for choose the nine winners. Ergo, this project is delivered and cannot be cancelled.

KYMcon 2017 Timetable

Click here to access the KYMcon 2017 timetable.

Last edited Jan 20, 2017 at 10:47PM EST

Rick James said “cocaine is one hell of a drug”. Of course, I’ve known that. An addict for 17 years, it’s been hard to remove.
Another thing about cocaine is that it’s considered the rich man’s drug. If that was the truth, then how is crack made. Freebase has made me a poor man. I’ve been living on the streets of South Beach since I was a boy. From wonder bread to nothing.
A place I’ve been known to stay is the Miami Convention center. The center is notably warm, and it doesn’t take too much to enter. I remember one day the best. There was a convention going on about online jokes. I don’t have a computer, I don’t get it. But after getting plastered on 3 lines, I walk into the convention center wearing only sandals, a ripped hoodie, and the same jeans I’ve worn since 2009. About 3 obese men wearing cartoon pony clothing, and an Asian man were there. The Asian introduced himself. His name was Brad. Brad spoke about how he made a living off cheeseburgers, and how maintaining a site was difficult work. I wasn’t phased. After about 30 minutes of listening, the 1 person still listening clapped, and he walked off the stage, seemingly disappointed in how his life has gone. I went up to him. “Would you care to give me some change,” I asked. He seemed nervous. “Haha, this is for fans of the site KnowYourMeme. Do you know that is?”. At that moment, something came up. It may have been that month old hot dog I had for breakfast, but I was not feeling great. I tried to contain myself, but it came out all too soon. Puke spilled out of my mouth. I had destroyed this Asian man’s fashionable jacket and jeans.
Brad was disgusted. He backed away. The three people, turned around from their discussion on how doge was an old meme, to see Brad’s filth. He was utterly embarrassed.
I was promptly kicked out of the hall. There is now a sign on the wall that says that I am not allowed to enter the convention center anymore. I never met that Brad character again.

As the first person to submit an entry to this competition, Asdfghjkl has received a Steam game just for being the first to participate!

Out of the list of possible games to win from this thread, he chose N++, a platformer based on an old flash game of the same name. That's not the only type of game being given away in this thread, check out the full list below and keep those entries coming!

Evoland 2, Homeworld Remastered Collection, Rust, Victor Vran, Pony Island, Chivalry: Medieval Warfare, Goat Simulator, Gunpoint, Guns of Icarus Online, Psychonauts, Torchlight II, The Escapists, Beyond Eyes, Cook Serve Delicious!, Octodad: Dadliest Catch, The Jackbox Party Pack 2, Borderlands the Pre-Sequel, Sid Meier's Civilization V, Saints Row the Third, Game of Thrones – A TellTale Series, Poker Night at the Inventory, TellTale's Poker Night 2, Sam & Max Season 3 – The Devil's Playhouse, Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People, Tales from the Borderlands, The Walking Dead Seasons 1 & 2 & 400 Days, The Wolf Among Us, Star Wars Dark Forces, Star Wars Empire at War, Star Wars Jedi Knight Dark Forces II, Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic 1 & 2, Hitman: Absolution, Just Cause Collection, Tomb Raider GOTY Edition, or Medieval II: Total War

KYMcon 2017 is the sequel to KYMcon 2014. I admit I haven't played KYMcon 2014 because I wasn't ready to make an account for this website that doesn't quite know yet if it wants to be a library of well-researched memes or a library filled with nothing but softcore porn of fictional characters. But now that I am happily and proudly a member of this cancer ward of a website, I prepped myself and journeyed to KYMcon 2017.

My journey started with me waking up late and misplacing my hotel room key. After spending an hour getting ready and another looking for my room key, which I had somehow managed to stick in my underpants in my fatigue the night before, I handed my room key to the receptionist--a look of uncertain fear and disgust shot across his face as he touched the key, felt its warmth, and caught a sniff of its odour--and made my way to the convention centre.

Now, I confess I haven't been to many conventions, mainly because I despise being in a crowded place where the atmosphere is 50% sweat vapour, and partly because, in all of the conventions I've been to, I was only interested in maybe 5% of it, so I didn't know quite where to go once I arrived. Fortunately, I met a friendly sort of bloke who saw me frantically being lost and unsure of where to go. He went up to me and asked me if I needed directions. After I awkwardly tried to hide the fact that I just didn't know what to do, he accurately deduced so and asked if I wanted to accompany him through the con, in a completely platonic way. I, being the straight man that I am except in the case of traps, agreed, and we explored the con--that is to say, he explored the con and I went along--until nighttime.

With the day ended, he asked me if I wanted to meet up again tomorrow. Sadly, my drive was gone, and so I declined, explaining that I'm going home in two days and wanted to take the day to rest.

With that ended my short KYMcon adventure, save a day of laying about watching TV in a hotel room.

Notice!
While the above "Writing" category entries by Le Noob and Sugary Salt are perfectly valid submissions to this competition, if you incorporate elements from the timetable linked at the bottom of the first post, you will receive extra marks. Seriously, please do, that thing took me a long time to put together.

You are also allowed to post multiple submissions.

The deadline for all competition submissions is now set for March 3, 2017 – the release date of the Nintendo Switch.

Notice!

More games have been added to the prize pool. These include additional copies of:

Ace Combat Assault Horizon, Enslaved: Odyssey to the West, Project CARS, Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic, Star Wars: X-Wing Alliance, Star Wars: X-Wing vs. TIE Fighter – Balance of Power Campaigns, Star Wars: Galactic Battlegrounds Saga, Star Wars: Battlefront II, Star Wars Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast, Star Wars: Starfighter, Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords, Star Wars Rebel Assault I + II, Star Wars: The Force Unleashed I + II, Star Wars: Rogue Squadron 3D, Star Wars: Empire At War

Last edited Feb 08, 2017 at 09:36AM EST

Notice!
Even more games have been added to the prize pool. Including more copies of:

Stardew Valley, Day of the Tentacle Remastered, Nuclear Throne, Octodad: Dadliest Catch, World of Goo, Mushroom 11, Super Hexagon, VVVVVV, The Stanley Parable, Guacamelee Super Turbo Championship Edition, Human Resource Machine, ROCKETSROCKETSROCKETS, Mini Metro

On The KYMCon 2017

This year I was at
The KnowYourMeme Convention
Please give me steam keys


On homosexuality

Neon is a faggot
But we love him anyways
Ha ha just kidding


On the NSFW guidelines

Softcore porn galore
Awaits you at KnowYourMeme's
Image galleries


In the Episodes Theatre

Scientists proved that
Cancer can spread through soundwaves:
"Meme-themed poetry"

Last edited Feb 15, 2017 at 11:21AM EST

FINAL 12 DAYS!
There is just 12 days left to submit an entry to this KYMcon 2017 competition for your chance to win Steam games! Just for participating, Le Noob and Triangle Mare have won "Stardew Valley" and "The Jackbox Party Pack 2", respectively. The competition isn't even over yet and these Steam games are going right out the door!

Stoffe has won "Day of the Tentacle: Remastered" too for his submission below:

His name was Blazer. Blazer is a smol guy with cyan hair, gray headband, and light purple shirt. He came to the KKK to go to KYMCon 2017 so he can propose KYM-Tan and possibly shoot up the building. He was about to enter till the racist security guards of Habbo Hotel stopped him.

>mfw used smg guns xd

He then entered the building and faggatorivly jumped to the back of the building at Stage 4 we're he found KYM-tan and her glorious… big bouncy…

>mfw censor that for the site

She denied Blazer's request, stabbed with a knife, and his corpse was on display as a "Blazerbox" situation. People since then gave him the best meems and harsh messages known to mankind.

Final 24 hours!

This is it! After 24 hours from this posting of this post, you cannot enter a KYMcon 2017 competition submission to win Steam games!

Winners will be announced sometime in the day after today. Good luck!

I have a stand, but across from me is a rival stand; an enemy stand if you will. My stand sells masks for pretty big guys, while my rival sells anime plush merchandise. Capitalist pig makes more money than me. I plan to seize his means of production by crying oppression over Twitter as opposed to taking the energy to walk over there and ask for advice on how to advertise my product.

Secretary, I'm getting a phone notification about a charity event I have to attend to soon. What is it about?

"That would be KYMcon 2017, Mr. Man. You have to attend as part of a charity fundraiser for our memesite moderator business. Just because they do it for free doesn't mean it doesn't want patreon dosh."

Fair enough, hit me up my schedule.

And so I went:

  • 9:30 – Attended the opening ceremony. Neonwabbit held a speech and said he invited Don to speak. Notable events: There was no Don.
  • 10:45 – Went to "Memed Memers with Don Caldwell". There was still no Don.
  • 11:15 – There was a Don now. Apparently he was stuck in traffic, told us we "got memed" (nobody laughed). I expected a good presentation but it was literally Don saying memetic phrases for the remaining half hour by request of the audience.
  • 12:00 – Neon texted me I had a Meet and Greet panel in the Hall of the Cheeto at 13:45 and they expected it to be busy since another moderator panel in the Homepage Hall would start in the middle of my panel; requested me to go to the Riff-Raff Autographs to take care of some of the autographs first in an attempt to shorten the line and allow visitors to attend both events. I asked him who planned this like that, he said Don, I wasn't suprised.
  • 12:30 – Arrived at Autographs hall. I now realized why Neon asked me to come here: Apparently several mods cancelled the event so Neon just let loose a couple of horses, spraypainted purple and blue respectively, and hoped no one would notice if I was there as well.

  • 12:45 – People started to roleplay with the horses, I quickly left. Drank coffee outside the convention hall until my panel started to avoid futher traumatic experiences.
  • 13:45 – My panel started, my fears became reality. Over the course of the panel I was asked: To sign 3 butts, to kiss some british lad, force a smile for like 500 pictures, give my stamp of approval to the name someone wanted to give to their firstborn, and an awkward amount of times to just talk because they wanted to hear my "dutch voice".
  • 14:30 – Apparently Don visited as well to laugh at me, he had this faint smell of alcohol on him. After he vomitted over a basket of freebies, the event was cancelled since Don had started a ruckus. I think some folks still took some freebies regardless of the vomit. In those 5 minutes Don did more for me than on the site.
  • 15:15 – Knowing some mods cancelled and Neon's "improvising", I decided to attend "PartyMare Says" in the Meme Museum. Neon literally just let the spraypainted horse run loose in the museum. The purple was replaced by an awkward amount of cheeto dust, but everyone found it too awkward to point out; I had a great time.
  • 16:00 – The horse escaped the meme museum.
  • 16:15 – The horse somehow ended up in Hall of the Cheeto during the "Riff-Raffing is Magic: Anti-Brones of KYM commentate
    MLP:FiM episodes"
    panel.
  • 16:19 – Brones managed to enter the Hall of the Cheeto when looking for the horse.
  • 16:22 – The brones that entered and the anti-brones who hosted the panel started fighting.
  • 16:23 – Neon removed the subtitle of the panel; reports will now refer to it as just "Riff-Raffing is Magic".
  • 16:35"How to Add Memes to Any Birthday Party", which was happening in the exact same timeslot elsewhere, succesfully managed to install a camera inside "Riff-Raffing is Magic"; the rest of the panel was literally just people, including myself, enjoying a livestream of the fight.
  • 17:00 – End of the day, I went to Neon for my paycheck so I could go home. He gave me $25 bucks, a ticket for starbucks which had already expired, and six bottles of dragon lube.

Yeah, KYMCon was interesting and pretty fun, but don't let that distract you from the fact that in 1998, The Undertaker threw Mankind off Hell In A Cell, and plummeted 16 ft through an announcer’s table

Breaking news Epyc Wyn Broke in the convention together with LezHuarez and Emperor Palpitoad and started to fling insults to everyone.
LezHuarez threw smoke bombs at the Pony stand, claiming that if his pics weren't allowed on the convention then none of the pony stuff should. He was quickly subdued by a mob of bronies
Epyc Wyn tried to charge at the mod panel but was tackled by Patrickbateman. Emperor Palpitoad Kept screaming through a megaphone that he didn't get it, only to be silenced by Gaben with a giant mountain dew bottle.

After an half hour of confusion the three of them where dragged out by security screaming things like "Mod Abuuuuse"

THRALL, I'M GETTING A MESSAGE THROUGH THE MAGIC MIRROR ABOUT A CHARITY EVENT I HAVE BEEN CALLED TO DISRUPT. WHO DARES DISTURB MY SLUMBER?

“KYMcon 2017 is about to begin, Mrs. Mare. It's been planned down to the slightest detail and is set to go flawlessly which naturally means you have to ruin it.”

FAIR ENOUGH. FETCH ME MY FLYING BROOM. THE ONE WITH THE FLAMES PAINTED ON THE SIDE.

And so I went:

  • 6:30 – Delivered a week's supply of hotpockets to every moderator's house with the sole exception of RandomMan.
  • 8:00 – Received confirmation that all of the other mods have cancelled their appearances in order to gorge on hotpockets.
  • 9:15 – Successfully caused a gigantic freeway pile-up on the way to the convention, destroying Don's car and forcing him to walk to the convention on foot.
  • 10:00 – Stole all of the ink from the autograph booth pens.
  • 11:00 – Intimidated a little girl into giving me her prize teddy.
  • 12:00 – Replaced all of the thickening agent in the candy floss carts with industrial-grade laxative.
  • 12:40 – Entered the Autographs hall. It was empty except for RandomMan caressing a spray-painted purple horse with "MARE" glued to the side on a sticky note.

  • 12:41 – Quietly left the Autographs hall.
  • 14:00 – The event in the hall had ended and the horse was left on its own. I covered it in cheeto dust in order to ensure that it would make a mess if it was used again.
  • 15:15 – It was used again. RandomMan seemed even more attracted to it now that it was covered in cheeto dust. What a fucking weirdo.
  • 15:30 – I realized that the attendees don't really even need my help ruining the event for themselves. I decide to leave early.
  • 15:45 – On my way out, I replaced RandomMan's gift voucher payment with six bottles of dragon lube.
Last edited Mar 02, 2017 at 05:40AM EST

Announcing our KYMcon 2017 Competition Winners!

= Writing Contest =
1st Place (Gold): RandomMan
2nd Place (Silver): Triangle Mare
3rd Place (Bronze): Le Noob Haxor

Writing Contest Runner-Ups:
4th Place: Particle Mare, Sugary Salt, ShiJo, superjumpman, Patrician trainer, Gnairly, C_Mill24


= Designing Contest =
1st Place (Gold): Stoffe
2nd Place (Silver): Major Bummer
3rd Place (Bronze): Asdfghjkl


= Recording Contest =
1st Place (Gold): ArchaicEX
2nd Place (Silver): Stoffe (for this entry)
3rd Place (Bronze): Not applicable/No entry


Thank you for participating!

Sugary Salt and superjumpman still need to claim their Steam game participation prize. Please PM me on KYM or Discord for details.

To all our 1st/2nd/3rd place winners in the other categories, expect PMs from me on Discord for the details on getting your additional Steam game prizes.


Please use this thread for congratulating the winners or for submitting any late entries to the competition. There might still be prizes left for the good late submissions…

Last edited Mar 03, 2017 at 11:10PM EST

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