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KYM Pony General V: We Just Don't Know What Went Wrong

Last posted Jul 01, 2012 at 04:43PM EDT. Added Feb 19, 2012 at 11:27PM EST
9926 posts from 193 users

Regarding the TLC thing,
It kind of makes me want to see if one can trick them into seeing one's really tiny collection.
"Yeah, I have a Derpy plush and a Chrysalis T-Shirt. I also have a DJ P0n-3 t-shirt but I don't know where that is right now. I'm just such a fan of the show! Oh, while we're at it, do you want to see my Agatha Christie collection? I have all her mystery novels, even the obscure ones! I know, I'm obsessed. ;)"

That would be the best troll ever.

Edit:
You're probably right Deadparrot- it is kind of a dumb idea now that I think of it.

Remember when TLC used to have awesome stuff like "Junkyard Wars"?
Good times, good times…

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 02:00PM EDT

@Bruelock
Pretty sure Equestria is just a country based on Hearth's Warming Eve where they founded it.
You don't 'found' a planet and it didn't look like they had to cross any oceans, so it's probably not a continent either.

I'd also guess that Manehatten, Los Pegasus, Fillydelphia, and Trottingham (Did I miss any canon city names?) are all part of Equestria given their pony puns.
This does open the cool possibility of seeing an episode take place outside of Equestria, though.
Maybe Zecora's homeland?

@Windigo
While that would be funny at the time, remember that they have the unholy power known as 'final cut.'
If they truly are out to paint a negative picture, they can edit even the most benign interviews into something crazy.
Outright trolling would make their 'jobs' all too easy.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 01:49PM EDT

@Drawing Ponies
Maybe I will try to make one later, and post my monstrosity here.
@TLC Interview
If a troll did respond I think he would decline the offer before he signed the contract for the interview so he is not liable, unfortunately I cannot predict the actions of others but that is what I would have done. But it might be best not to respond to them.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 02:20PM EDT

Jackal Lantern wrote:

HAY GUIZE I DARW A PONY TOO!

Discorded archer pony using a knife as an arrow jumping forwards above a wrestling match between pinkie pie and rainbow dash, and rainbow dash is winning?

Close. It's actually a pic of my OTP: Princess Celestia and Doctor Doom. They're holding hands/hooves under the starry night sky of Acapulco and talking about FEELINGS and MAGIC and CONQUERING THE PLEBEIAN MASSES.

@BSoD, Millennial, DeadParrot

Thanks for the answers guys. I think I'm very convinced Equestria is, indeed, a Nation to begin with.

…wait a minute…

BSoD – Earth Pony

Millennial – Pegasus

DeadParrot – Unicorn


The Prophecy!!!!

edit: Wow, so that's how idiotic I've become if I stay up extremely late at night. Night all.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 03:27PM EDT

Hey, everybody!
Toys 'R Us is taking pre-orders for the pony bundle that includes the Nightmare Moon, Trixie, and Vinyl Scratch toys!

Go here: ORDER PAGE
It's even called the 'Favorites Collection' which is almost certainly a more subtle way of writing 'Brony Bundle.'
This could be a great way to show that we will buy high quality toys if given the chance!

@Bruelock
I forgot you were out in Malaysia.
You're talking about going to bed when it's high noon for me!
TIMEZONES!
But at least you got the unicorn thing right for me.
Seeing as how I obsess over Scoots and RD mostly, I figured that most people would assume that I'd want to be a pegasus.
Being scared of heights and hating to put things in my mouth rled that right out for me, though. =)

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 03:43PM EDT

Jackal Lantern wrote:

HAY GUIZE I DARW A PONY TOO!

http://wiki.teamfortress.com/w/images/0/00/Scout_misc09.wav
i have no idea what that is and i don't care to find out

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 03:59PM EDT


If I didn't know better….I'd say…you're…trying to…seduce me…er….
I….

(ahem)

Back to topic…

@Nightmare Moon

@Jackal
That's quite the piece of art you've got there…

@Bruelock's Prophecey
"One pony to rule them all, One pony to find them, One pony to bring them all, and in the darkness…bind them?"
"One pony will bring balance to the force and defeat the dark side?"
"But there is one they fear. In their name, he is dovakiin: pony born?"



I would like to see a ponified version of max payne in that position. Looks pretty badass

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 04:20PM EDT

@Popper
I'm not sure a pony could realistically bend that way, what with their reversed knees and all.
Have some other Max ponies, though!


(Hint: Check out the holster in the second one!)

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 04:36PM EDT

@Windigo
You beat me to posting that pic…

But I wanna call BS on your sick thoughts on why the sky is blue…
Now im gonna disprove your theory
WITH SCIENCE LEMONS

@Thor
Well, the sky is blue because when it rains, 20% of the rain levitates into the atmosphere when noones looking. The rain then has to talk to the council of blues, lead by chuck norris, morgan freeman, and gordan freeman, located aboove cloud nine, a cloud that wanders around the Earth, never to dissapear, but turns invisible every now and again. The rain must go through a number of challenges to prove themselves worthy of becoming one with the sky. If any raindrop so much as fails one challenge, they are roundhouse kicked by chuck norris into the center of the galaxy with all the other failure raindrops. For all the raindrops that pass, they are taken to the sky by rainbow dash and morphed into the blueness of the sky. If the raindrops pass the trials perfectly, they are turned into a new color of the rainbow, which only 7 have done completely. The other 80% of rainbows that didnt go to cloud nine transform (like a transformer or voltron force robot) back into clouds, awaiting their next chance to be taken to cloud nine.

I hope this clarrified why the sky is blue.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 04:39PM EDT

I just realized something. With my new song, less than 50% of the pony songs I've written even allude to Rainbow Dash.

Better get working on that Dash song.

@Equestria and other nations

You know, I think the fact that Equestria ISN'T the entire world implies that Celestia really isn't the tyrant we like to make her out to be. Think about it, how long do you think a country could remain sovereign if the head of the conquering nation can just say "Submit to me or no sun."

@Parrott
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODIGETATOY!
FEATURED, BITCHES! I FINALLY GOT SOME LOVE FROM HASBRO! SUCK IT, CELESTIA! THEY MADE YOUR FIRST TOY PINK! AT LEAST THEY GOT ME RIGHT THE FIRST TIME!
>MFW it actually looks good

Damn straight I'm cute. And the toy matches perfectly with it.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 05:24PM EDT

@Drawing topic.
I'm currently very low equipped so I use my Ipod touch to take photo of my drawing.

Here it is.
It my first attempt at drawing my own OC.

I guess I could be able to draw some ponies after all.Despite the fact I lack of scanner and some blank sheet of paper.

@Fifths
I'd assume it's the same things as Narnia in "the Chronicles of Narnia"
The name "Narnia" applies to both the entire world and a country within it (the others being Archenland and Calmoren). I'd say the world is called "Equestria", but the land of the ponies (bearing the same name) is merely a nation within it.

Which brings me to another point…
Twilight Sparkle obviously studies the stars and night sky: astronomy. Using a telescope, she'd find out that stars and planets are distant bodies far from her.
Which would also include the sun. The sun that Celestia supposedly raises.
By mere observation with a telescope, one can see distant worlds. She'd find out that the sun is a body that her planet orbits, not raised across the sky. The moon, likewise, is also a body that orbits her planet.
Also, it isn't likely one can raise a star that is only visible (might I add, quite brightly and close) to one part of the land, dispproving the theory she only does it for the ponies.
The sun is a star that planets in a system revolve around. The moon is a satellite that moves around in synch with the Earth. Both are actually relatively far from our planet.
Simple astronomy.
At the same time, Celestia is shown here to be raising the sun:

But notice that the sun is raising behind her as she moves up. She seemingly is doing no effort to actually raise it.
This can be explained through cross-referencing in our word:

-Many ancient cultures that existed before their knowledge of outer space bodies had the belief that their ruler (or the priests) was responsible for raising of the sun. Usually, some sort of ritual (performed at just the right time) would make it appear (and they too would believe) they "raised" the sun. Aztec belief stated that after Huitzilopochtli sacrificed himself, his people were tasked with sacrifice to him, otherwise, he'd stop raising the sun. Therefore, they went out to war to seek captives for sacrifice.

-Cults have also surrounded "god kings". Pharaohs and Incan, Aztec, and Japanese Emperors are among those who are divine rulers on earth decended from…the sun deity. Therefore, they seem to have the highest connection to their sun gods in their religion, and can request their intervention through ritual. Often these kings are tasked with performing rituals that would ensure the continuation to their sun deity's work on raising the sun.

So, Celestia and Luna could:
-Not be aware of the fact they have no control over the sun and moon.
-Are aware… but don't tell the populace to keep their prestegious positions.

Now, in Monotheism, God/Allah is the creator of all. He rules all, but if you notice in Christianity/Judaism/Islam, God/Allah does little in regards to astronomical control.

@Nightmare Moon
I can see your excited

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 05:50PM EDT

Back Later wrote:

@Parrott
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODIGETATOY!
FEATURED, BITCHES! I FINALLY GOT SOME LOVE FROM HASBRO! SUCK IT, CELESTIA! THEY MADE YOUR FIRST TOY PINK! AT LEAST THEY GOT ME RIGHT THE FIRST TIME!
>MFW it actually looks good

Damn straight I'm cute. And the toy matches perfectly with it.

Bigger Version

Yeah I was bored.

Windigo With Salad wrote:

Here you go.

Obligatory pony:

I just had to find the source for that one. My bros are pretty darn freaky when they want to be, apparently.

As for the NMM toy, I have definitely been looking forward to the release of that. I don't know if I'll even buy it, I just like the fact that it exists.


@PopperFett

Interesting analysis, but there's just one problem: They really do raise the sun and moon. This is not just some kind of ruse, it's absolutely canon. NMM really was keeping Equestria in nighttime, and the sun was only raised after she was defeated. Remember that Celestia was scheduled to raise the sun long before that point for their Summer Sun celebration (summer solstice). Discord also proved undeniably that magic controls the movement of celestial objects in the show. This is less a question of trickery and more a question of what their world is even like. For example, you mentioned The Chronicles of Narnia; that's appropriate, because you may recall that in that story the world was incredibly different from ours. It was flat, and one could easily reach the "end" of it, which seemed to be in the form of a great wall or barrier. Stars weren't giant burning masses, they were some mysterious kind of people suspended in the sky. Time itself was controlled by an enormous sleeping giant underground. Likewise, the mythos regarding the operations of Equestrian physics seem to be dramatically different from our reality.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 05:52PM EDT

@RandomMan
>2012
>No derpy
0/10
CANNOT BUY

@Windigo below this post
Im not grasshopper
Im Megalolzors

btw, i've seen that pic before, but my initial reaction was

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 06:03PM EDT

@Dan
Taken.
But counter-proposal:
That event with Nightmare Moon was 1000 years before. Doubtful that anyone alive (other than Celestia and, well, Nightmare Moon) would remember such an event.
"Celestia and Nightmare Moon are the only accounted ones living at that time"
Remember also that Spike discredited it as an "old mare's tale".
Now, the existence of Nightmare Moon did prove that Luna/Nightmare Moon was indeed real, and Celestia and Luna are indeed some sort of immortal (to a point) beings. However…did the event happen exactly as told?
You'd be interested to know that while the Holy Bible in Genesis 1 does contain a narrative on the creation of the Universe, Catholic theology does state that the creation of the universe was performed by God, it didn't happen as Genesis explains (as there is no possible record or person that could've been alive at such an event). So in Catholicism: God did create the universe, but not as explained.
At the same time, Celestia and Luna did have a fall out, but nothing happened exactly as legend states.
However, I also did bring up Twilight Sparkle specifically for a reason:
If she can map stars and study astronomy the same as we do (which she does), we can assume that her perception of the universe from her location is similar (if not the same) as ours. Remember that when the lens for telescoping was invented, there was an explosion in findings regarding the sun, moon, and other cosmic bodies. With her telescope, she'd find out these things. Such as the elliptical movement of planetary and solar bodies, which in turn, dispproves the theory that the Sun is merely an object only visible by us. Also, with her knowledge of astronomy she'd know that she's on a planet in a universe with her system rotating around the sun.
Physics? I'd say with a planet that has gravity similar to Earth, and is also similar to Earth in all ways (ableit with magic), one can assume physics are comparable and probably not too different.

@Popper
1) NMM created night (not eternal, but extended) really recently.
2) Discord, being of similar power to the sisters, was able to turn all of Equestria into a Salvador Dali painting- so why do you have a problem with the sisters being able to control the sun and moon?

Anyway, my personal theory is the pony galaxy is geocentric with the sun and moon orbiting the planet. Perhaps the sun is moon sized, and a similar distance from the planet as the moon as well, but that's just baseless conjecture.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 06:23PM EDT

@Popper
I've seen the theory thrown around that Celestia and Luna technically control the rotation of the planet which is what gives the illusion of 'raising' the sun and moon. Now that would imply a stationary moon relative to the planet, but a planet that doesn't spin on its own would allow for all the other phenomenon that Twilight sees to still be valid without taking the Princesses' power out of the equation.
Nightmare Moon simply stopped the planet with her lands on the dark side.

Then again, while it seems similar to Earth, the inclusion of magic can quite pretty much trump any potential hole in what we perceive.

@Popper

Just as Windigo said, don't forget that the first two episodes showed an extended night thanks to Nightmare Moon, and you really mustn't forget Discord, who changed it from day to night and back again in seconds, with the sun and moon literally reversing direction. Those were certainly no natural phenomena.

And just as DeadParrot stated, there are different explanations as to what the precise methodology is. Do they literally have their own personal star that they rotate around the planet at will, or do they simply rotate the planet itself? Who know, it's all magic either way.

Just a question, what would happen if there was a solar eclipse? Would luna get in trouble or something, would it be a special event for all the ponies in equestria to see, or maybe a mistake of celestia? It would be interesting to see an episode about that.

CocoaCannon wrote:

Just a question, what would happen if there was a solar eclipse? Would luna get in trouble or something, would it be a special event for all the ponies in equestria to see, or maybe a mistake of celestia? It would be interesting to see an episode about that.

Just Luna screwing around…

I say, I do feel like Spock right now…

Anyway:
"Magic"
Magic is more similar to the Force in Star Wars: a selective power given to only certain people who in turn have the ability to use it.
Now, Celestia and Luna are obviously the most connected to it from anyone else. Sure, they're powerful, but are they that powerful?
Now, let's assume that they do have some way of controlling the cosmos. I'd go with DeadParrot's theory (loosely) that if anything, they can control the positioning of their planet to match what they want. Therefore, they aren't actually controlling the sun and moon, but are rather controlling their planet to move in a way that would make it seem that they were doing so.
Still a long stretch, but somewhat believable.
Now, Discord. That is an excellent point.
Celestia and Luna ARE NOT the only ones with access to this power. So if they have control, apparently it's an ability that can be mastered by another. Discord obviously was either the first to learn this, or it's an ancient ability that only the ones powerful enough can learn.
Also, I bring up two more points:
Chrysalis & Cadence
Chrysalis is apparently some sort of version of an alicorn among her species. But she doesn't have the same god-like powers as Luna or Celestia. Instead of controlling the cosmos, she sought to rule Equestria on her own. Cadence is an alicorn, who apparently, had to come from SOMEWHERE.
But would a divine being sire a bastard with a commoner? I don't think so, so there must be other alicorns…which would mean Celestia and Luna are not unique.
Remember: Chrysalis was able to overpower Celestia. If Celestia can be subdued (which would imply Luna has the same mortality) by Chrysalis with her gained power…who would rule?
So what if Chrysalis won? What if she was smart enough to kill Cadence rather than let her live, thereby, the power of love could not stop her? Who would hold this power; the ability to raise and lower the Sun and Moon? If she could do it, then again, it's not a skill only they can achieve.
Then what is it then? If you can dethrone a divine ruler… is he or she really devine? So if you can subdue the ones that hold the power to control these cosmic bodies, who would take over?
If Celestia and Luna are indeed the only ones to this power, Chrysalis must know that subduing them would spell her own death along with the entire world's.
So she must find someway to control said cosmos.
Now, back to saying if it was a skill. Chrysalis could easily learn this if that were true. So the ability to control these things is either an inherited right (and therefore not a sign of divinity), or or again, a skill.
A skill that can be learned.
Not divine; just a skill.
But if a thing were simply a skill…who's stopping any one with power from ruling on their own might?
So…why haven't they?
Because they don't know they can, or…
They can't; neither can Luna or Celestia. They keep power through belief.

As for Windigo, mind you, our sun is incredibly far away from us. But we still see it as a gigantic thing in the sky and feel it's heat. Our far distance is actually probably what makes this planet habitable. If a star was that close to a body, I would guess that the planet would be uninhabitable, as the heat from the star and the close distance would be too great for life to exist

@Random Man
Interesting…
But the same arguement could be used against that. Their planet could be the one causing the inteference, rather than Celestia's 'power'.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 07:09PM EDT

I'm not really a fan of headcanons. Try to avoid them as much as possible. So I'll just go with a theory that seems accurate to me and say that Celestia and Luna can control the sun and moon. I mean, it's canon. Even the creators say it. So why should we doubt it?

As for a seperate planet:

This is Gliese 581-g, one of the very few planets discovered so far that could contain liquid water (and therefore live).

Exitance of Gliese 581-g is however not confirmed yet. As the planet was discovered through the behavior of it’s star Gliese 581. Gliese 581 would show odd movements, which could be explained through the influence of a possible nearby planet.

Add to this that Celestia can control the Sun in Equestria, and you have a reason for this in your headcanon.

Gliese 581 is also a red dwarf, which makes the star smaller and cooler. Therefore Gliese 581-g needs to have a closer position to Gliese 581 in order to have the right temperature for liquid water. A star in a position like that would of course be easier to control by Celestia’s magic in comparison to our Sun (A Yellow Dwarf).

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 07:33PM EDT

@Popper
Who would have controlled the sun under a Chrysalis matriarchy?
Unicorns. Just like they did before the rule of Celestia. They'd probably be brainwashed and forced to do it against their will.

Also, In my scenario the sun is really small comparatively, therefore allowing it to be closer to the planet.

@Random
The blizzards were because of the windigoes. Remember, the "new land" was completely blizzard free before the leaders started fighting, therefore attracting the windigoes and the snow that follows. The windigoes basically convert hate into frost, but with all the harmony they had nothing to eat. So they left.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 07:29PM EDT

@Popper hinting at the absurd notion that the sister's don't control the heavenly bodies.

Alright Popper, I'll humor you. Let's assume, purely for the sake of argument, that while staring into her fancy witchcraft telescope, Twilight discovered some evidence that suggested the royal sisters don't control the movements of the heavenly bodies. Do you really think that she's going to come forward and accuse the diarchs of lying to the country about the sole ability that their rulership is founded upon?

Ha Ha, no.

@popper

"Cadence is an alicorn, who apparently, had to come from SOMEWHERE.
But would a divine being sire a bastard with a commoner? I don’t think so, so there must be other alicorns…which would mean Celestia and Luna are not unique."

Huh, but where Popper? Where could other ponies originate from…wait…

Did…did Popperfett just call Pony sex canon? Popper, am I to understand that you actually believe that ponies, beautiful innocent ponies, feel, lick, suck, fuck, and fondle each other? Are you telling me that for every pony, there is at least one instance of a stallion PENETRATING a mare? I just want to know, is that what you're saying?

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 07:39PM EDT

Windigo With Salad wrote:

@Popper
Who would have controlled the sun under a Chrysalis matriarchy?
Unicorns. Just like they did before the rule of Celestia. They'd probably be brainwashed and forced to do it against their will.

Also, In my scenario the sun is really small comparatively, therefore allowing it to be closer to the planet.

@Random
The blizzards were because of the windigoes. Remember, the "new land" was completely blizzard free before the leaders started fighting, therefore attracting the windigoes and the snow that follows. The windigoes basically convert hate into frost, but with all the harmony they had nothing to eat. So they left.

Meh, mass murder sounds more fun. But your scenario of a smaller sun does match with my theory. I'm removing the Windigo section, too vague and just quickly made up.

But the part that everyone's mentioning here about no sun without Celestia does clash with the time of the Windigos. But then again, nothing in the episode said she wasn't alive either. It was about the 3 tribles, not who controlled the sun.

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 07:33PM EDT

RandomMan wrote:

Meh, mass murder sounds more fun. But your scenario of a smaller sun does match with my theory. I'm removing the Windigo section, too vague and just quickly made up.

But the part that everyone's mentioning here about no sun without Celestia does clash with the time of the Windigos. But then again, nothing in the episode said she wasn't alive either. It was about the 3 tribles, not who controlled the sun.

Well, they did outright say the unicorns were controlling the sun and moon in "Hearth's Warming Eve." They also implied at the end that the windigoes are still very much alive, but their power is greatly diminished seeing as how it's no longer a windigo ruled ice age.

Vid semi-related:

Last edited Jun 22, 2012 at 07:45PM EDT

@Discussion
You all should know those are the false deities of Equestria! They use only smokes and mirrors to fool you.
Their costumes are VERY clever card board cut outs that can fool even the most wises of ponies!

YOU ALL SHOULD KNOW WHO IS THE REAL DIETY OF THE REALM THAT IS CALLED EQUESTRIA!

@Fifths
Such and would probably not go well (the idea that Celestia did not control the sun). And I admit, neither did the ideas of scientists go well with the Catholic Church. Though most of these things are accepted into Christendom now, they were not accepted at the time.

In regards to pony sexuality…
"Standard Mammalian Reproduction 101"
That would entail those things, yes. Of course they sexually reproduce.

Skeletor-sm

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