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>Notice the sword/knife behind Engie
>Pull him out of the way and throw bottle at sword/knife weilder’s head

>Pull Engi away from knife
>Do kung-fu moves and stab Dead Ringer Spy

EDIT: I forgot the cookie

“And so the bottle tried to meet”
“A spy who ate great defeat.”

The soldier was about to lose the "H"of homeless…but then…

“Sorry buddy! Duty calls! I’ve got to help a friend of mine here! You can check the place or hang around with the snipers. After we beat some BLUs, we can go, got it?”
So…?
*Beg to Merasmus
*Try to drive?
*Make your own choice!

(No tricks on this one, you are free to walk around RED base)

>Grab that scattergun on the BLU scout’s dead body
i mean, since you’re already breaking class only weapons by using the demo’s bottle, why not break it some more?

Just when soldier was heading to RED base with a toolbox and a BLU scout’ scattergun…
“A WILD HEAVY-MEDIC COMBO APPEARS!”

Soldier:
[Beg] > [Merasmus the magician]
[Attack] > [Trash Talking]
[Another Option?] > [Make your own!]

[Help] > [Call Bombinomicon to drop a clue again on this thread]

>wait, what the fuck is that green skull in the background?
also >Help
and I can’t see the cookie.

>Smash the BLU Heavy’s head in with the toolbox.
Or better yet:
>Swiftly dodge BLU Heavy’s attack, fire a scattergun shot at the Medic, and pick up the Huo-Long Heater that’s sitting on top of the Fedora-topped Sniper to the right.

Alright buddies! I will drop a clue again hehe…Okay, where to start? First, that green skull is the hat of the worst magician ever! Nuff ’said!
Better check that picture lads, soldier has 5 different ways to deal with that heavy! or even more ways!

(BTW, cookie here)

>What Lone K Said

>There’s an Owl over there to the right. Pick it up and make it sit on your shoulder

I totally expected something else but this wins too!

To kill the soldier , the heavy tried!
He missed and saddly the medic died!
The hobo used a scattergun’ shell
to send the medic back to hell!

Well now, who is laughing now russian bastard?"

Now should we:
*Forgive the heavy
*Kill that Russian Fairy Freak
*Beg to Merasmus..

[Bombinomicon isnt giving clues on this one!]

>shoot Merasmus in the doorway cuz he won’t stop stalking you

No lets not kill heavy, we can get some answers from this guy

>Interrogate Heavy and find out what he knows about Merasmus

Also tell him to dance or else you will shoot!

>Tell Heavy to give him back his hobo teeth.

Not like he had any before anyways.
OR:
>Forgive him and celebrate with a dance of the BLU and RED. While Merasmus precariously watches them behind a bush, witnessing this blissful disturbance.

>Kill the heavy
>Tell merasmus to stop stalking you

>Interrogate Heavy and find out what he knows about Merasmus

Blue Screen and Mexx Android, you will have to share the same cookie.

“Us the BLUs are not allowed to talk about the magician,he watches…everything! But if you got that bomb book then…”

You better start to fear!
Becouse Merasmus is here!

THAT’S ENOUGH, MERASMUS APPEARS! I CAN FEEL YOUR DELICIUS TEARS!

A wild MERASMUS! appears!
The first boss battle begins!
What to do?
[Beg] > [Meras- Oh wait..IT’S TO LATE MORTALS!]
[Attack] > [Trash Talking]
[Another way] > [Make your own!]
[Help] > [Call Bombinomicon to drop clue again on this thread]

>[Rocket Jump the fuck out of there!]

>Go Super Saiyan Soldier all over him.

By the way, soldier can’t do a rocket jump becouse he doesn’t have a rocket launcher!

>[Shit. I dunno! Trash Talk!]

>Jump in the water.
>Make Merasmus all “slippery” and “wet”.

The magician was pretending to be very grim
One stupid weakness, he didn’t know how to swim!

CURSE YOU SOLDIER! AND CURSE THIS PLACE FOR A THOUSAND YEARS!

Two ways that end in a sure death
Soldier didn’t have time to catch a single breath

Come soldier! Face the vortex that will carry you to Ghost Fort!

OR face headless horseless horseman man…! Err…without his sword…? I MEANT TO DO THAT.
and
a friend of yours will visit you..from his grave in CP_SAWMILL!

What to..do?
*[Too late to beg]
[Swim] > [Ghost Fort Vortex] OR [Try to face Horseless Headless Horsemann]
[Another Option] > [Think of it]

[Help] > [Bombinomicon ready to drop another clue on this thread]

>TO GHOST FORT! TALLY FORTH!

>TO THE GHOST FORT

>SAVE YOUR FRIEND ENGI!!!
>TO THE GHOST FORT!!!!!!
>AWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone gets a cookie becouse everyone said the same!

To the Ghost Fort, Soldier ran away..
Merasmus will arrive at the end of the day!
Little time we have to prepare…
until the magician returns to his lair!

Now with a half dead brain team around, what should I do?
*Oh you were expecting “beg to Merasmus”? Too bad for you…
*Meet the Red Team
*Chase that monkey ghost?
*Make your own choice!

[Bombinomicom isnt giving clues on this one]

>Chase the monkey ghost

>Tell everyone to stop fighting and prepare for Merasmus’ spirit to arrive and try to kill everyone.

I’m pretty sure that BLU is there, right?

>Soldier gets +100 Leadership points

>micspam

Leadership points? That could work

“Keep searching , go ahead.
All the BLUs are already dead!”

And so the Red Spy told the Soldier that every RED had a problem
From the 3 snipers fighting over hats, to the sad heavy who just lost his minigun, the scout running away from a monkey, the pyro just got zombified and the demo lost something.

Let’s help
*Merasmus
*The Snipers
*The Scout
*The Heavy
*The Pyro
*The Demoman

[Nope,Bombinomicon isn’t dropping clues again!]

>Help the pyro
>For a moment, wonder why you’re a homeless hairless hobo soldier when you have a beard

Fake beard…

>Help Pyro

Since he’s a zombie, we need to blow his brains out with a scattergun first before he zombify’s anyone else so the Pyro takes top priority. And yes, killing a zombie is helping said zombie

>Trade with dead Pyro for his Haunted Soul for a hat.
>Go to Demoman and ask what he needs for help.

>fuck everything
>dance

>do an obligatory backflip

>DO WHAT I HAVE TOLD YOU ALREADY!!!

Lads! So sorry for making you guys wait but I had some serious problems with Gmod and I got my hands on some new models and a few tools (Like better TF2 models!), anyways, cookies for those who wanted to help the pyro and…"

Heres your gibus Calkarot

“The pyro has been dancing all the day!”
“To stop him? There’s no way!”

*Godamn it, make him stop, his hippie dancing is burning my eyes! Should I..?
*Beg to Merasmus? Oh you miss Merasmus don’t you?
*Slap the dancing fever out of him.
*Another option? Make your own!

[Bombinomicon ready to drop clues again! Just call me!]

>ask bombinomicon for help

Hey buddy! Here I am! Bet ya missed me! Here’s my clue-thing!
The pyro can’t stop dancing huh? Hey, I bet ya that that there is SOMETHING he/she misses, SOMETHING that he/she likes to do a lot , that something will make him/her stop!
Alright, good luck buddies!

Do a back flip.

>Pyro has bought his soul from the dancing devil.
>Smack him out of it and REAP THINE HAUNTED SOUL OUT OF HIM!!!
>Kill the soul with fire. Pyro never had a soul anyways, might as well make him the soulless monster he is! (No offense, Pyro. You still are a kickass class.)

What the fuck why did I get negative karma? You people don’t have a sense of humor…

>Slap the dance out of pyro

(He’s wearing a gas mask so there’s no risk of being bitten)

Well, I was expecting something else but that could work too

The pyro refused to stop the “thriller”
so the soldier decided to stop this “parody killer”.

That should be enough soldier but we still have to help another RED members:
*Help the Heavy
*The Demoman
*The Snipers
*The Scout

EDIT: BTW, dont blame everyone Calkarot, I am the one without sense of humor, feel free to give me negative karma :)

>Help the Hoovy

>Help da Hoovy

Why did you stop those pictures that you had to look hard at?

I guess it’s Hoovy time

>Help Hoovy

Becouse:
>Since we are meeting the RED team and Merasmus is not around, HHH Soldier doesn’t have to worry a lot
>Almost every BLU is dead…almost….dun dun duunn
However..you are damn right, I need to start making that kind of pictures again

“Help my friends! Heavy lost something!”
“What? Who knows? He told me nothing!”

Dear Bilbo Baggins, his haircut…What should I do?

*SOONER OR LATER, YOU WILL START TO MISS THE OPTION TO BEG TO MERASMUS.
*Give him a haircut
*Search that something
*Make your choice!

[Bombinomicon isn’t dropping clues on this one becouse, c’mon guys, It’s so easy! If you look closely at CENSORED