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Corrupt a Wish

Last posted Apr 19, 2013 at 08:49PM EDT. Added Jan 12, 2013 at 03:21PM EST
485 posts from 72 users

Granted. It’s cancelled after one episode.

I wish for my very own planet upon which I can build my Eggman Empire.

Last edited Feb 26, 2013 at 08:54PM EST
Feb 26, 2013 at 08:53PM EST

Your planet is destroyed as soon as you colonize it.
I wish I got paid to be on the internet.

Feb 26, 2013 at 08:55PM EST

Granted. They’re incredibly stale.

I Sonic was turned to stone so that I can conquer the world!

Last edited Feb 26, 2013 at 08:59PM EST
Feb 26, 2013 at 08:58PM EST

“I-Sonic” doesn’t exist.

I wish that these wish replies would be more funny and not plain stupid.

Last edited Feb 26, 2013 at 09:12PM EST
Feb 26, 2013 at 09:12PM EST

Granted- they’re funny to everyone… except you.
I wish I had an infinite number of wishes with absolutely nothing impeding my ability to make them and for them to be granted in the exact way that I desire.

Feb 26, 2013 at 09:17PM EST

Granted. You must die for your wishes to be activated, however.
I wish for a pack of M&M’s.

Feb 26, 2013 at 09:21PM EST

You didn’t actually grant my wish in the way that I stated it, which is the whole point, so

Feb 26, 2013 at 09:46PM EST

You’re correct, that was pretty ignorant of me.

Alright, you get your wishes, but in order to make them, one animal must be roboticized and enslaved for each wish. Note that this is not technically impending your ability to make wishes, however, I don’t think it would be morally responsible of you to make wishes under these conditions, and therefore, your wish is corrupted.

Oh, and about those M&M’s?

Last edited Feb 26, 2013 at 10:46PM EST
Feb 26, 2013 at 10:17PM EST

Granted, but they’re peanut M&M’s and you’re allergic to nuts.

I wish I had a bass guitar.

Feb 26, 2013 at 10:48PM EST

Granted, but you lose it in a lawsuit against Willy Wonka.

I wish for a pizza.

Last edited Feb 26, 2013 at 10:51PM EST
Feb 26, 2013 at 10:49PM EST

Granted, but it’s a pepperoni pizza, and you’re allergic to pepperoni.

I wish I had a bass guitar.

Feb 26, 2013 at 10:52PM EST

You get the shitty Dodge hatchback….stock.
I wish to live for 100 years in an indestructible home with a self-contained eco-system where I am the apex predator, and I have the ability to observe the outside world without fear of harm or war.

Feb 27, 2013 at 01:07PM EST

You die from lack of proper medical attention when you injure yourself.
I wish my snuggie kept me warmer.

Feb 27, 2013 at 07:13PM EST

You pass the test, your drug test. (well no, you didnt fucking junkie)

I wish I could stop cursing.

Feb 28, 2013 at 11:33AM EST

Granted, but you’ll soon have to battle a dark warlock and will be defeated instantly without the use of magic.

I wish for a perfect universe with no pain or suffering of any kind, only eternal joy.

Feb 28, 2013 at 11:58AM EST

Granted but it doesn’t take pictures.

I wish my granted wishes had more sense.

Feb 28, 2013 at 01:09PM EST

Granted but you lack the funds and your internets collapse

I wish for an IRL Spurdo

Feb 28, 2013 at 02:40PM EST

Granted, a friend pulls a prank on you by shooting a portal on the floor and the ceiling right above it, trapping you in an endless fall.

I wish for some delicious cake.

Feb 28, 2013 at 06:27PM EST

granted your boss is now Mr Burns.

i wish for some dr pepper (^ your name remembers me of it)

Feb 28, 2013 at 07:52PM EST

granted but it’s embalming fluid (cause poison is old)
i wish for the galactic empire

Feb 28, 2013 at 07:57PM EST

Granted, but it comes with Windows ME

I wish for delicious pastries.

Feb 28, 2013 at 08:09PM EST

You get the killer bunny from Monty Python
I wish for an unlimited amount of always-legal money

Feb 28, 2013 at 09:02PM EST

Granted. The money self-destructs right before you spend it.

I wish for a Mountain Dew.

Last edited Feb 28, 2013 at 09:04PM EST
Feb 28, 2013 at 09:03PM EST

granted but no marshmallows only a time traveling dude
i wish for an laser pointer

Feb 28, 2013 at 10:27PM EST

Granted, but it turns out it really IS ole’ fashioned. All the bubbles are gone by now.

I wish that my mind wouldn’t melt when I try to read something above my education level.

Mar 01, 2013 at 06:56PM EST

Your mind now implodes when reading something above your education level.
I wish for a hug.

Mar 01, 2013 at 07:07PM EST

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