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Stupidest Thing You've Ever Overheard Someone Say

Last posted Nov 05, 2014 at 04:53PM EST. Added Oct 20, 2014 at 09:06PM EDT
59 posts from 41 users

In this thread, we spin a yarn about something stupid that you've overheard someone say.

This is a story that just happened this morning. I'm at the gym going through my workout and I have my earphones out because I tend to take them out during certain exercises and forget to put them back in. I'm doing incline dumbbell flys when I overhear two overweight middle aged guys talking about the difference between levels of physical fitness in Europe and the United States. I then hear this from one of them:

"The reason that Europeans are more physically fit than Americans is because of their superior genetics. They're pretty much purebreds. No mutts like us here in America. It's not fair how all of them have bodies like surfers."

I nearly dropped the weights at the sheer stupidity and insanity of the comment. I've heard loads of dumb comments as to why people can't work hard in the gym for the body they want but I've never heard anyone use eugenics as an excuse before.

Anybody else have any good ones?

Last edited Oct 20, 2014 at 09:06PM EDT

I was at a store once, and overheard a woman having an argument with the cashier. Apparently the cashier wouldn't let the woman (who looked no younger than 30) buy a bottle of root-beer under the claim that she wasn't old enough to purchase alcohol.

Last edited Oct 20, 2014 at 09:16PM EDT

NintenDylan wrote:

I remember someone in my high school biology class legitimately thought an eagle was a mammal.

I got into an argument with a girl who thought ants weren't animals (and she took AP bio with me).

On the bus, sitting behind me:

Girl 1: whoa, you two had sex?!

Girl 2: yeah.

Girl 1: did you get him to wear a condom?

Girl 2: no. I'm not allergic to sperm.

Girl 1: what are you talking about? It's meant to stop you from getting preggers!

Girl 2: but sperm doesn't cause babies.

Girl 1: uh, yes it does! Duh! My biology teacher told me that, like, more than half of pregnancies are caused by sperm!

"I think women don't get STEM degrees as much because the patriarchy is trying to prevent women from getting the most useful jobs."

Higher education really needs tougher standards for enrollment.

I was in my school bus, and then two girls are saying:

"Hey, which one's better, #sokawaii or #emoing?" (喂,哪一个比较好,#sokawaii 还是 #emoing?)

"Both. The more the better." (两个都可以。越多越好。)

Wat.

Teddy Sadcat wrote:

I was in my school bus, and then two girls are saying:

"Hey, which one's better, #sokawaii or #emoing?" (喂,哪一个比较好,#sokawaii 还是 #emoing?)

"Both. The more the better." (两个都可以。越多越好。)

Wat.

It means fucking weeaboos.

Yosuke Isn't Back wrote:

Me and a friend argued over why penguins can't fly, and he told me "They can't fly because you're a douche!"

See, that’s not him being stupid. That’s you getting rused.

I remember just sitting in a mcdonalds and hearing these group of what I think was conspiracy theorists (they had t shirts on with a logo) , and this one guy was gettin all serious

"Now, ya see, saturn doesn't have a ring around it because of space debris, no, it's got that ring because NASA blew up the crust layer of the planet. Why do you think it's yellow?"

and then I was talkin to my mom for a bit, and then I over hear them again when she stopped talking

"AND WHY DO YOU THINK IT'S A CONSPIRACY? IT'S NOT CONSPIRACY, IT'S FACT."

Advanced Irony wrote:

I remember back in 7th grade I overheard some kids talikng about doing weed. In 7th grade.

Even worse, I heard a lower high school student and a lower college student talking about weed… in a Java programming class held at a place with a strong Catholic affiliation.

I also remember overhearing at my school that a TV show was good except one episode because it supported gays.

Also some girls talking about playing as "Meta Knight from Mario" in Smash Bros. Almost as bad as the people who think Kirby is a Pokémon.

“The reason that Europeans are more physically fit than Americans is because of their superior genetics. They’re pretty much purebreds. No mutts like us here in America. It’s not fair how all of them have bodies like surfers.”
I nearly dropped the weights at the sheer stupidity and insanity of the comment. I’ve heard loads of dumb comments as to why people can’t work hard in the gym for the body they want but I’ve never heard anyone use eugenics as an excuse before.

Except it's the truth. #pureblooded-master-race

I have a few:
-Someone said to their friends " Why can't vending machines just be free?"
-A group of people were unironically pronouncing "meme" as "maymay"
-"Don't you think Ebola is a little like illegal immigrants?"

Some chick in middle school said, and I kid you not.

"History repeats itself because the native Americans are still around, right?"

That was ironically the same year she dyed her hair blonde,

Back in my sophomore year of high school, I took chemistry for the school's science requirement. First day of class, we have kind of a general "ask the science teacher anything science related" session. During the questions, this line ends up being uttered by some girl in the class:

"So if there wasn't any gravity in the room, we wouldn't be able to breathe, right?"

Sadly, this person managed to do consistently well in the class, too.

real quotes from a girl in my grade.
"onions are vegetables, not plants"
"the tuna is a dolphin, not a animal"
and i heard two people discussing that the moon is a hologram projected by nasa to hide a massive orbiting reptilian base, and to hide antichrist as well.

Last edited Oct 21, 2014 at 07:26PM EDT

TripleA9000 wrote:

I once got into an argument with this chick in my AP English 11 class who believed that if you put trash into the sun it would cause the sun to become polluted.

It would. The sun does actually have an atmosphere. Theoretically, enough trash could cause smog to appear and block some of the sun's light. However, this would be a shitload of trash and probably more than humans would ever be able to produce.

This is assuming that the trash would get to the sun's atmosphere before being burned up in space, but even that would cause pollution of the solar system. Again, this wouldn't make a noticeable difference unless there was enough trash.

When we finished our GCSE exams, we talked about the results. Someone jokingly said about how easy the first question was. It was "Which of these source of materials is non-renewable?" It was multiple choice and thee answers were A.Tree B. Sheep C. Oil and D was something renewable. One of guys said "It's sheep, wasn't it?" and he said how he put that down.

Evry single class. Every single day. I hear a fucking joke about Ebola. There are billions of fucking Ebola jokes I hear everyday. I don't want to example any because none of them have any damn brain cells, and even my friend made a fucking joke today. I even hear them say "That's the Ebola" every time after someone coughs.

@Spider-byte

It's because when that sheep is kill, you can't bring it back to life. :^(

@Advanced Irony

That's not stupid, that's just dark humor. Frankly, I can understand how you take offense to it, but nearly everyone jokes about ebola now. There's an entire thread doing that on this site. It's not that horrible. People always make dark jokes. It's not anything new. If you can't handle them, fine, but don't start talking about it like everyone who uses dark humor is a complete idiot devoid of any knowledge at all when that's simply not the case.

@Spooky Sam
Well I'm not trying to make offense of it, it's just that they're not funny jokes and I don't think anybody takes it seriously. I was in history class and the teacher mentioned the black plague and how Ebola is like the plague of Africa (I don't remember what he said, that was 2 weeks ago) and everyone laughed once he mentioned it and some kid said "Can I get some Ebolaaaaaa" Like Ricola.

"The distance between Earth and Sun is 1 kilometer"

"If you want to get worms, just mix water with sand"

"Wait! So I have to read the instructions, then run the program?"

Advanced Irony wrote:

@Spooky Sam
Well I'm not trying to make offense of it, it's just that they're not funny jokes and I don't think anybody takes it seriously. I was in history class and the teacher mentioned the black plague and how Ebola is like the plague of Africa (I don't remember what he said, that was 2 weeks ago) and everyone laughed once he mentioned it and some kid said "Can I get some Ebolaaaaaa" Like Ricola.

The next person I hear say Ebola in that fashion is gonna get fucking punched.

Skeletor-sm

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