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Another Flippin' Adventure Thread AKA Adventures in Genericness

Last posted Mar 02, 2013 at 07:59PM EST. Added Mar 02, 2013 at 04:29PM EST
9 posts from 7 users

So I saw a few threads like this a while ago, but I haven’t seen any in a while. I checked the first three pages and I didn’t see any, so it’s safe to say there hasn’t been one for a little while. Okay, here we go;

You wake up in a dark jail cell. The only light is through a window about three feet above the cot. The room, as far as you can gather, is 10mX10mX7m. The door is made of rusted iron. You can hear voices coming from outside of your cell. What will you do?

Sir Crona Crescent Duke of Landwales wrote:

You scream until your throat hurts. Eventually, someone from outside the window yells in a muffled voice “Shut the fuck up.”

>What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

>Remember what you look like
You’re having difficulty with that, since you currently are in a stupor most likely induced by chloroform or some other antiseptic.
>Retrieve Arms
Nice try, but your captors aren’t stupid enough to let their prisoner have weapons in his cell. Wait, scratch that, there’s an empty futuristic pistol thingy under your cot. When you find ammo, these guys are gonna be sorry they crossed… Whatever your name is.
>Try to remember what happened last night
All you can gather from your fatigued hippocampus is something about an undercover job. Hey, you seem to be wearing some kind of trench coat with some things in its pockets.
1x Gun (Empty)
1x Rag
1x Empty chloroform bottle
1x Fancy PDA looking thing
Bank notes ($20 total)


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