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Oh no! You're accused of witch craft and you've being sentenced to death!

Last posted Feb 05, 2014 at 08:39PM EST. Added Jan 31, 2014 at 06:13AM EST
33 posts from 30 users

Choose the month you were born to see how you’ll be executed!

  • January – Hanging
  • February – Burned at the stake
  • March – Beheaded
  • April – Drowning
  • May – Death by torture
  • June – Crushed to death
  • July – Death by Cucking Stool
  • August – Strangulation
  • September – Death by Garrote
  • October – Murdered before sentencing
  • November – Death by Iron Maiden
  • December – Died of Hyperthermia from being in Stocks for too long
  • BONUS

  • February 29th – Set free with magic and curse everyone involved in your trail
Last edited Jan 31, 2014 at 07:13AM EST
Jan 31, 2014 at 06:16AM EST
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So. I’m strangled by garrote.

May I suggest you strangle with chains, and spikes so I can be edgy?

Last edited Jan 31, 2014 at 07:44AM EST
Jan 31, 2014 at 07:41AM EST
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Fine..FINE..FINE MORTALS
I will be beheaded
My head will hit the ground..
and my corpse will be burned into ashes…
but mark my words..I shall return from the grave..and steal that which you hold most dear…

YOUR HEAD!

Jan 31, 2014 at 08:21AM EST
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Kurenai is secretly working for the NSA, collecting information about our birthdays.

Too bad I looked through your disguise!

Last edited Jan 31, 2014 at 10:03AM EST
Jan 31, 2014 at 10:02AM EST
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Aristocatification aka Lolishiiit wrote:

Kurenai is secretly working for the NSA, collecting information about our birthdays.

Too bad I looked through your disguise!

Jan 31, 2014 at 11:13AM EST
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I read that whole Wikipedia page, and I still don’t understand what the fuck a cucking-stool is.

Jan 31, 2014 at 03:02PM EST
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^I presume OP meant ducking-stool, because a cucking-stool usually didn’t result in the death of the witch. In the cucking-stools, people were stripped down and placed in a chair somewhere in the center of town, during which they had to recite their sins/crimes. The ducking-stools were used to dunk people in water (similar to water boarding I guess) and occasionally resulted in death. Witches were usually thrown into the water in the ducking-stool to see if they floated or not. If they floated, they were deemed to have been rejecting the baptismal waters and thus in league with the devil. Not sure what happened to the ones who didn’t float though. I’m guessing the innocent drowned. *shrug*


Looks like I get death by stocks. Dang it!

Of course, maybe there’s the off chance that I can get knocked free by some unsuspecting travelers. XD

Jan 31, 2014 at 03:46PM EST
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Laud Piestrings wrote:

Death by Iron Maiden? Well, I’m a witch… I can always fake a death somehow!

Wherever you are, iron maiden’s gonna get you no matter how far. Iron maiden can’t be fought, iron maiden can’t be sought.

Also, fucking stocks. That’s the most boring one, at least beheadings and maidens there’s blood and guts. All I get is stuck out in the cold.

Jan 31, 2014 at 06:31PM EST
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Death by Dunking Stool…

“Hey, if she’s actually a witch she will survive from this right?”

“That’s how it works. If she can not drown we go and behead her someplace else.”

“But wait, what if it actually turns out she isn’t a witch, and we murder a poor innocent girl?”

“Don’t be ridiculous! Of course the… logic… must be sound… oh fuck, drag her back out.”

“Fuck! She’s Dead! What do we do!?”

“We go behead the body and claimed she lived! That’s it! uhhhh what have we gotten ourselves into…?”

Jan 31, 2014 at 06:50PM EST
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I would be strangled the old fashioned way, but my avatar’s a robot-computer-thing, so there’s that…
What are you gonna do, cover up my air vents?

Feb 01, 2014 at 04:53AM EST

Garrote… anything with a name that sounds that horrible must be equally or even more horrible.

Feb 01, 2014 at 11:59AM EST

Snowie wrote:

Garrote… anything with a name that sounds that horrible must be equally or even more horrible.

It’s a rope or cord or chain that you strangle someone with.

Feb 01, 2014 at 03:56PM EST
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Gravity Man wrote:

I would be strangled, but that’s no fun…

-“How do you know that she is a witch?”
-“She looks like one!”

Also, I died by garrote.

Last edited Feb 05, 2014 at 05:00PM EST
Feb 05, 2014 at 05:00PM EST
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There’s a heavy metal band joke I can use here. I’m sure it hasn’t been used yet.

Feb 05, 2014 at 05:23PM EST
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its the Cucking stool for me
but i shall not rest in my watery grave
for if i am indeed a warlock
then there shall be no rest for the wicked

Feb 05, 2014 at 05:36PM EST
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Laud Piestrings wrote:

Death by Iron Maiden? Well, I’m a witch… I can always fake a death somehow!

it is funny because iron maidens are not real (or at least they were never used)

Feb 05, 2014 at 05:38PM EST
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Well, I do know witchcraft, right? Why not turn into something that IS a head, huh? So I can’t be beheaded, HUH!?
Loophole success.

Feb 05, 2014 at 06:44PM EST
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Drowning……meh could be worse.
And my final words would be the next ones:

Last edited Feb 05, 2014 at 07:55PM EST
Feb 05, 2014 at 07:53PM EST
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Burned at the stake.
Ooh, going classic are we?

Last edited Feb 05, 2014 at 08:46PM EST
Feb 05, 2014 at 08:39PM EST
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Skeletor-sm

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