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Know Your Maymays General III: KYM Thread Simulator 3 CONFIRM3D

Last posted Jul 16, 2014 at 01:26PM EDT. Added Mar 11, 2014 at 05:27AM EDT
307 posts from 78 users

Hey, guys. I know I promised the following scene in the IRC, but some of my friends/relatives know what my YouTube channel is now, and I can’t risk having this risque scene in KYM Thread Simulator 3. If you really, really, REALLY want me to put it back in, please say so ASAP.

NeonWabbit wrote:

Hey, guys. I know I promised the following scene in the IRC, but some of my friends/relatives know what my YouTube channel is now, and I can’t risk having this risque scene in KYM Thread Simulator 3. If you really, really, REALLY want me to put it back in, please say so ASAP.

It’s your project. If you’re not comfortable with this, then it’s best to leave it be.

I’m pretty sure there are enough shenanigans around here than a BSoD rapefic.

Blue Screen (of Death) wrote:

@Neon

Are your family members actually going through all your YT video’s? Or is it more of a passing chance that they’ll’ see it?

Hmm… just a passing chance, actually. On Facebook, my mum and some family friends liked the post containing a link to my first SFM video, and my older brother definitely has snooped around my channels without me specifically showing him a video. But apart from that, no troubles.

For some reason, I’m not allowed to look at any of his videos, but he once told me he showed my MLP GEDDAN video to friends at school just because of the view count being in the millions. He hates the show (MLP:FiM) but his friends are just neutral on it.

So, if you’re fine with the current writing in this scene, or if you want me to change a few lines first, yeah… I think I can sneak this back into the video. Maybe, I could have the characters say the word “COMMA” and look to the camera each time they do so, so that it seems like they’re only saying the family-friendly phrase “I want to come inside [COMMA] Blue Screen (of Death)”.

Swear words in the earlier parts of the video (such as “sh*tposting”) are not affected by this, as I can at least say they were written by other people.

Last edited May 23, 2014 at 11:08AM EDT

One day I was watching science channel, browsing /r9k/ and playing some old NES ROMs. I have a TV next to my computer monitor so I can do all of this shit at the same time. It was about 3am and I was really tired, having already brushed my teeth and washed my face, I was about ready to go to bed. I hadn’t even noticed what I was watching at this point, it usually ends up as background noise anyway while I do something more entertaining. I glanced over and it seemed like some shitty infomercial just started, since it just turned 3:30. I got up to go to bed when I heard the guy on the TV say “hey you don’t go to sleep yet, I’ve got a great deal for you”. I turned and looked back at the TV and I laughed to myself, how does he know I’m going to bed?

He looked rather stressed out, as if he was forcing a smile. I noticed I couldn’t see his hands, and he wasn’t using them to talk like most people do. He actually seemed to keep them behind his chair. His teeth were a dark yellow brown color, as if they had been soaking in soda in that Mythbusters experiment. His eyes were drooped and his cheeks looked like they were pasted on, he must have been in his late 70’s. He was a well dressed man I must admit, a pinstripe suit was garnished by a red rose attached to his suit jacket, a white shirt and a black tie finished off the whole deal. The more he spoke, the less I seemed to listen, focusing mostly on his affect than his words.

It was then that I realized that the volume decreased to a near mute at this time. I went to turn it up, but my remote control wasn’t having any effect on my television. It was then that he blurted out, “Ahh, now that I have your attention, I have to get around to what I was going to tell you.” at this point I let loose a little dribble of pee this startled me so much. I just stared intently at the mans sunken eyes, whose pupils seemed to dominate almost all of the eye including the whites. He began his speech once again, leaving a long pause where he slowly revealed his rotten teeth once again. “Now then, as you may or may not have realized this isn’t exactly cable television anymore. No, far from it, this is meant especially for you.” At this point my stomach was in my toes, I was having trouble breathing. Some people refer to it as shock, there should be another word to describe the intensity of fear that I felt. “I’ve been watching you for a while now, as you may or may not have noticed,” he spoke. “there were times where I thought you weren’t ready, however those feelings were quickly eradicated when I saw how easy it was to, how should I say, ‘direct’ you.” As he said this, pictures of me completing daily chores came across the screen. They started out believable enough, me outside hanging laundry, me outside cleaning the pool, me through the window cooking dinner, me letting my girlfriend in through the front door. As they progressed they became less realistic and more as if this man was using noclip to get through my walls.

Pictures of me in the shower, pictures of me sleeping, pictures, pictures, pictures. They didn’t seem to stop, his raspy voice repeating “‘direct’ you” over and over again. The pictures became more grim, pictures of me inviting the neighbors into my house, pictures of them tied up, pictures of them mutilated, decapitated, limbs rendered into separate pieces. At this point I was numb, I couldn’t move. “remember now? don’t you remember your directions? you were supposed to bury them, you were supposed to get rid of them. But what did you do? you simply left them there. They haven’t moved since you’ve seen them last.” I refused to believe this. It was too absurd. I had no recollection of anything like this happening, I didn’t even talk to my neighbors let alone invite them over. “you did it, you did it John but you couldn’t accept it. And that’s why I’m here, that’s what I had to tell you so bad. You tried to fight off the demons, but you simply couldn’t. They took over.” I had no idea what to think. I started to shout, as if the man in the TV could hear me.

“No! I must kill the demons!” I shouted

The TV said “No, John. You are the demons.”

And then I was a zombie.

To celebrate the upcoming release of KYM Thread Simulator v3.0, I’m releasing a 3rd reward (as seen in the 3rd document I made for this thread, which was the list of the rewards). Every surviving still image from that stars thread (the .gifs play at their normal speed) will appear on screen for exactly 0.3 seconds in this video which is 3:33 in length. Enjoy! It’s thre- I mean free!

Last edited Jun 16, 2014 at 04:33AM EDT

Spider-Byte wrote:

@NeonWabbit

What song was that?

For the stars thread video, I used the Ducktales Moon theme.

Specifically, it’s a FamiTracker remake of that theme titled “moon_edit.ftm” taken from this page:
http://famitracker.com/forum/posts.php?id=5087

I did remove 3 notes from the end, as it didn’t sound quite right with those notes in there. This is why you only hear a few drum samples at the end of the song (the bit where it loops back into the middle of the song) in my video.

Here is my favourite version of the song. I cried while listening to it the first time:

I should’ve used this version for the video actually. It’s nearly 3:33 haha.

Somewhere in West Philadelphia, you will find an old basketball court with a single ball lying in the middle. Pick it up and start shooting hoops. After a while, a small group of hooligans will approach you and challenge you to a fight, which you must accept.

After the fight, you must go home and relay the events to your mother. She will then inform you that you have an aunt and uncle living in one of the districts of Los Angeles, and out of fear, she will send you to live there for an indefinite period of time.

With your bags packed, go to the street corner, and whistle for a cab. The cab that will pull up will bear the word FRESH on the license plate, and upon closer inspection, novelty fuzzy dice will hang in the mirror. Although you will suddenly realize that cabs like these are extremely hard to find, do not bear any thought to it. At this point you MUST point out in front of the car and say ‘Yo homes to Bel Air’. You will stop in front of a mansion, and it will be sometime between 7 and 8 o’clock, even though it will feel like you’ve been traveling mere seconds. Get your luggage out and say ‘Yo homes, smell ya later!’, but do NOT turn back to face the cabby. Walk up to the door, look over your shoulder once, and then knock on the door three times.

If you follow these instructions, your life will get flip-turned upside-down.

CrowTheMagician wrote:

Somewhere in West Philadelphia, you will find an old basketball court with a single ball lying in the middle. Pick it up and start shooting hoops. After a while, a small group of hooligans will approach you and challenge you to a fight, which you must accept.

After the fight, you must go home and relay the events to your mother. She will then inform you that you have an aunt and uncle living in one of the districts of Los Angeles, and out of fear, she will send you to live there for an indefinite period of time.

With your bags packed, go to the street corner, and whistle for a cab. The cab that will pull up will bear the word FRESH on the license plate, and upon closer inspection, novelty fuzzy dice will hang in the mirror. Although you will suddenly realize that cabs like these are extremely hard to find, do not bear any thought to it. At this point you MUST point out in front of the car and say ‘Yo homes to Bel Air’. You will stop in front of a mansion, and it will be sometime between 7 and 8 o’clock, even though it will feel like you’ve been traveling mere seconds. Get your luggage out and say ‘Yo homes, smell ya later!’, but do NOT turn back to face the cabby. Walk up to the door, look over your shoulder once, and then knock on the door three times.

If you follow these instructions, your life will get flip-turned upside-down.

do i become a prince in the process?

CrowTheMagician wrote:

Somewhere in West Philadelphia, you will find an old basketball court with a single ball lying in the middle. Pick it up and start shooting hoops. After a while, a small group of hooligans will approach you and challenge you to a fight, which you must accept.

After the fight, you must go home and relay the events to your mother. She will then inform you that you have an aunt and uncle living in one of the districts of Los Angeles, and out of fear, she will send you to live there for an indefinite period of time.

With your bags packed, go to the street corner, and whistle for a cab. The cab that will pull up will bear the word FRESH on the license plate, and upon closer inspection, novelty fuzzy dice will hang in the mirror. Although you will suddenly realize that cabs like these are extremely hard to find, do not bear any thought to it. At this point you MUST point out in front of the car and say ‘Yo homes to Bel Air’. You will stop in front of a mansion, and it will be sometime between 7 and 8 o’clock, even though it will feel like you’ve been traveling mere seconds. Get your luggage out and say ‘Yo homes, smell ya later!’, but do NOT turn back to face the cabby. Walk up to the door, look over your shoulder once, and then knock on the door three times.

If you follow these instructions, your life will get flip-turned upside-down.

Instructions were very clear, became a Prince of Bel-Air

UPDATE TIME!

KYM THREAD SIMULATOR v3.0 IS FINALLY ONE HOUR IN LENGTH (and counting!).

Also, remember that not all of this video is thread simulation, there is a group of animated cutscenes inbetween some parts, including one that tells an epic dramatic love story about the crusade to come inside Blue Screen (of Death)[SPOILER AHEAD]’s house.

ANYWAY, WHILE I WORK TO CREATE THE FIRST KYM-RELATED FEATURE-LENGTH MOVIE (unless there’s another I’m unaware of), HERE IS THE FIRST 30 SECONDS OF KYM THREAD SIMULATOR v3.0! OMFG! WOW! IT ACTUALLY EXISTS!

(P.S.: For those who want a shorter KYM Thread Simulator v3.0, please complain below and I will cut the movie up into parts and call them v3.1, v3.2, etc. as originally intended.)

Sorry for not arriving earlier.

A motherf***ing car believed xe was a cow simply because xe had a cow-themed paint, and you can guess the rest. I was in the hospital for three days.

….about the long video issue, my suggestion is to both make a full-hour version(v3.0), and a version that is split into four 15 minute-long parts(v3.0_1, v3.0_2, v3.0_3 and v3.0_4).

Last edited Jun 22, 2014 at 01:37PM EDT

OpelSpeedster loves the BMW M3 GTR wrote:

Sorry for not arriving earlier.

A motherf***ing car believed xe was a cow simply because xe had a cow-themed paint, and you can guess the rest. I was in the hospital for three days.

….about the long video issue, my suggestion is to both make a full-hour version(v3.0), and a version that is split into four 15 minute-long parts(v3.0_1, v3.0_2, v3.0_3 and v3.0_4).

That idea’s so crazy, it just might work!

Thank you!

Let’s make the Cuil a unit of measurement.

One Cuil = One level of abstraction away from the reality of a situation.

Example: You ask me for a Hamburger.

1 Cuil: if you asked me for a hamburger, and I gave you a raccoon.

2 Cuils: If you asked me for a hamburger, but it turns out I don’t really exist. Where I was originally standing, a picture of a hamburger rests on the ground.

3 Cuils: You awake as a hamburger. You start screaming only to have special sauce fly from your lips. The world is in sepia.

4 Cuils: Why are we speaking German? A mime cries softly as he cradles a young cow. Your grandfather stares at you as the cow falls apart into patties. You look down only to see me with pickles for eyes, I am singing the song that gives birth to the universe.

5 Cuils: You ask for a hamburger, I give you a hamburger. You raise it to your lips and take a bite. Your eye twitches involuntarily. Across the street a father of three falls down the stairs. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. I give you a hamburger. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. You cannot swallow. There are children at the top of the stairs. A pickle shifts uneasily under the bun. I give you a hamburger. You look at my face, and I am pleading with you. The children are crying now. You raise the hamburger to your lips, tears stream down your face as you take a bite. I give you a hamburger. You are on your knees. You plead with me to go across the street. I hear only children’s laughter. I give you a hamburger. You are screaming as you fall down the stairs. I am your child. You cannot see anything. You take a bite of the hamburger. The concrete rushes up to meet you. You awake with a start in your own bed. Your eye twitches involuntarily. I give you a hamburger. As you kill me, I do not make a sound. I give you a hamburger.

6 Cuils: You ask me for a hamburger. My attempt to reciprocate is cut brutally short as my body experiences a sudden lack of electrons. Across a variety of hidden dimensions you are dismayed. John Lennon hands me an apple, but it slips through my fingers. I am reborn as an ocelot. You disapprove. A crack echoes through the universe in defiance of conventional physics as cosmological background noise shifts from randomness to a perfect A Flat. Children everywhere stop what they are doing and hum along in perfect pitch with the background radiation. Birds fall from the sky as the sun engulfs the earth. You hesitate momentarily before allowing yourself to assume the locus of all knowledge. Entropy crumbles as you peruse the information contained within the universe. A small library in Phoenix ceases to exist. You stumble under the weight of everythingness, Your mouth opens up to cry out, and collapses around your body before blinking you out of the spatial plane. You exist only within the fourth dimension. The fountainhead of all knowledge rolls along the ground and collides with a small dog. My head tastes sideways as spacetime is reestablished, you blink back into the corporeal world disoriented, only for me to hand you a hamburger as my body collapses under the strain of reconstitution. The universe has reasserted itself. A particular small dog is fed steak for the rest of its natural life. You die in a freak accident moments later, and you soul works at the returns desk for the Phoenix library. You disapprove. Your disapproval sends ripples through the inter-dimensional void between life and death. A small child begins to cry as he walks toward the stairway where his father stands.

7 Cuils: I give you a hamburger. The universe is engulfed within itself. A bus advertising hotdogs drives by a papillon. It disapproves. An unnatural force reverses Earth’s gravity. You ask for a hamburger. I reciprocate with a mildly convulsing potato. You disapprove. Your disapproval releases a cosmic shift in the void between birth and life. You ask for a hamburger. A certain small dog feasts on hamburger patties for the rest of its unnatural, eternal endurance. Your constant disapproval sends silence through everything. A contrived beast becomes omnipotent. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger your body becomes an unsettled blob of nothingness, then divides by three. The papillon barks. The universe realigns itself. You, the papillon, and the hamburger disapprove. This condemnation stops the realignment. Hades freezes over. A pig is launched is launched into the unoccupied existence between space and time with a specific hamburger. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger. It screams as you lift it to your face. You laugh maniacally as I plead with you. You devour the hamburger as it pleads for mercy. I disapprove and condemn you to an eternity in a certain void where a certain pig and its specific hamburger are located. The Universal Space-time Continuum Committee disapproves of my irrational decision. You are locked away and are fed hamburgers for the rest of your natural existence. A pickle refuses to break down during the process of digestion. You die in a freak accident. A certain pickle lives the rest of its life in a comatose state. Your soul disapproves. Down the street a child cries as a hamburger gets stuck in, and climbs back up, her esophagus. You ask again for a hamburger. I refuse to reciprocate. You demand a lawyer. I remind you harshly that this is the new world order. Lawyers no longer exist. Only papillons. Your name is written on a list of sins. Blasphemy. You ask for a hamburger. The comatose pickle vanquishes your soul from this universe. Realignment occurs. You beg for a hamburger. A certain papillon’s name is written on an obelisk in Egypt. Mumble. Peasants worship the obelisk. Your soulless corpse partakes in the festivity. Hamburgers are banned universally. The sun implodes. All planets cease to have ever existed. Mercury. Venus. Earth. Mars. Jupiter. Saturn. Uranus. Neptune. Pluto is the only mass in existence. Conveniently, you are on vacation here. Your need for hamburgers re-establishes space-time. Earth is recreated under your intergalactic rule. Hamburgers are your army. You wake up. Clowns. Clowns everywhere. Your dream rushes to meet you. You are kidnapped. You ask for a hamburger. They hand you a hotdog.

CrowTheMagician wrote:

Let’s make the Cuil a unit of measurement.

One Cuil = One level of abstraction away from the reality of a situation.

Example: You ask me for a Hamburger.

1 Cuil: if you asked me for a hamburger, and I gave you a raccoon.

2 Cuils: If you asked me for a hamburger, but it turns out I don’t really exist. Where I was originally standing, a picture of a hamburger rests on the ground.

3 Cuils: You awake as a hamburger. You start screaming only to have special sauce fly from your lips. The world is in sepia.

4 Cuils: Why are we speaking German? A mime cries softly as he cradles a young cow. Your grandfather stares at you as the cow falls apart into patties. You look down only to see me with pickles for eyes, I am singing the song that gives birth to the universe.

5 Cuils: You ask for a hamburger, I give you a hamburger. You raise it to your lips and take a bite. Your eye twitches involuntarily. Across the street a father of three falls down the stairs. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. I give you a hamburger. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. You cannot swallow. There are children at the top of the stairs. A pickle shifts uneasily under the bun. I give you a hamburger. You look at my face, and I am pleading with you. The children are crying now. You raise the hamburger to your lips, tears stream down your face as you take a bite. I give you a hamburger. You are on your knees. You plead with me to go across the street. I hear only children’s laughter. I give you a hamburger. You are screaming as you fall down the stairs. I am your child. You cannot see anything. You take a bite of the hamburger. The concrete rushes up to meet you. You awake with a start in your own bed. Your eye twitches involuntarily. I give you a hamburger. As you kill me, I do not make a sound. I give you a hamburger.

6 Cuils: You ask me for a hamburger. My attempt to reciprocate is cut brutally short as my body experiences a sudden lack of electrons. Across a variety of hidden dimensions you are dismayed. John Lennon hands me an apple, but it slips through my fingers. I am reborn as an ocelot. You disapprove. A crack echoes through the universe in defiance of conventional physics as cosmological background noise shifts from randomness to a perfect A Flat. Children everywhere stop what they are doing and hum along in perfect pitch with the background radiation. Birds fall from the sky as the sun engulfs the earth. You hesitate momentarily before allowing yourself to assume the locus of all knowledge. Entropy crumbles as you peruse the information contained within the universe. A small library in Phoenix ceases to exist. You stumble under the weight of everythingness, Your mouth opens up to cry out, and collapses around your body before blinking you out of the spatial plane. You exist only within the fourth dimension. The fountainhead of all knowledge rolls along the ground and collides with a small dog. My head tastes sideways as spacetime is reestablished, you blink back into the corporeal world disoriented, only for me to hand you a hamburger as my body collapses under the strain of reconstitution. The universe has reasserted itself. A particular small dog is fed steak for the rest of its natural life. You die in a freak accident moments later, and you soul works at the returns desk for the Phoenix library. You disapprove. Your disapproval sends ripples through the inter-dimensional void between life and death. A small child begins to cry as he walks toward the stairway where his father stands.

7 Cuils: I give you a hamburger. The universe is engulfed within itself. A bus advertising hotdogs drives by a papillon. It disapproves. An unnatural force reverses Earth’s gravity. You ask for a hamburger. I reciprocate with a mildly convulsing potato. You disapprove. Your disapproval releases a cosmic shift in the void between birth and life. You ask for a hamburger. A certain small dog feasts on hamburger patties for the rest of its unnatural, eternal endurance. Your constant disapproval sends silence through everything. A contrived beast becomes omnipotent. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger your body becomes an unsettled blob of nothingness, then divides by three. The papillon barks. The universe realigns itself. You, the papillon, and the hamburger disapprove. This condemnation stops the realignment. Hades freezes over. A pig is launched is launched into the unoccupied existence between space and time with a specific hamburger. You ask for a hamburger. I give you a hamburger. It screams as you lift it to your face. You laugh maniacally as I plead with you. You devour the hamburger as it pleads for mercy. I disapprove and condemn you to an eternity in a certain void where a certain pig and its specific hamburger are located. The Universal Space-time Continuum Committee disapproves of my irrational decision. You are locked away and are fed hamburgers for the rest of your natural existence. A pickle refuses to break down during the process of digestion. You die in a freak accident. A certain pickle lives the rest of its life in a comatose state. Your soul disapproves. Down the street a child cries as a hamburger gets stuck in, and climbs back up, her esophagus. You ask again for a hamburger. I refuse to reciprocate. You demand a lawyer. I remind you harshly that this is the new world order. Lawyers no longer exist. Only papillons. Your name is written on a list of sins. Blasphemy. You ask for a hamburger. The comatose pickle vanquishes your soul from this universe. Realignment occurs. You beg for a hamburger. A certain papillon’s name is written on an obelisk in Egypt. Mumble. Peasants worship the obelisk. Your soulless corpse partakes in the festivity. Hamburgers are banned universally. The sun implodes. All planets cease to have ever existed. Mercury. Venus. Earth. Mars. Jupiter. Saturn. Uranus. Neptune. Pluto is the only mass in existence. Conveniently, you are on vacation here. Your need for hamburgers re-establishes space-time. Earth is recreated under your intergalactic rule. Hamburgers are your army. You wake up. Clowns. Clowns everywhere. Your dream rushes to meet you. You are kidnapped. You ask for a hamburger. They hand you a hotdog.

you havin sex with yo bitch in da night, nottin happenin and den the fhone rights, “yo watcha doin with my girl” i reply “are u dad” then he appear in the front of me and said, “no” his eyes w3Re bloodshot and he had hyper-realistic blood everywhere on his body, he took my gf and told me
“btw my name is mr steal ur gurl” then a hyper realistic skeleton popped out and killed me, hyper-realistic blood was everywhere.

lowercase wrote:

you havin sex with yo bitch in da night, nottin happenin and den the fhone rights, “yo watcha doin with my girl” i reply “are u dad” then he appear in the front of me and said, “no” his eyes w3Re bloodshot and he had hyper-realistic blood everywhere on his body, he took my gf and told me
“btw my name is mr steal ur gurl” then a hyper realistic skeleton popped out and killed me, hyper-realistic blood was everywhere.

This thread and the following pages are now claimed under the property of “Dark Star™®©℗”

You are to accept your fate to be subjugated eternally under “Dark Star™®©℗”‘s iron will. There shall be no resistance to avoid “Dark Star™®©℗”’s big godly dick.

Any filthy human being who resists is expected to be met with, but not limited to: Loss of limbs, brain corruption, total obliteration, poison, extreme retardness, and to be deported to Titan.

Thank you. Have a good day.

Last edited Jun 23, 2014 at 01:54PM EDT

This is KYM simulator III
There are three I’s in III
Half life 3 has three in it
3 + 3 = 6
6/2 is three
There are three sides in a triangle
Triangle = illuminate

NEONWABBIT CONFIRMED ILLUMINATE ANLONG WITH HL3 COMING OUT!

Freelancer wrote:

The power of online translators is great
I just ranted about how I have more SWAG in japanesse

してください、私はrandomanより私は寝袋持っているより寝袋持ってきました未来。 私ネオン,ウサギより寝袋だったたします。 私はあなたのお母さんより寝袋よりポルノ夜にたたします。 理由を知りたいですか? ために: shreak愛 shreak このすべての4チャンでスパムに寿命の時間です。

熱風炉バーランドへようこそ

私は、シャークレイプさ

Skeletor-sm

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