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A man walks into a bar….

to do his job as a bartender. While working, a woman asks for a double entendre. So he gave it to her.

A woman…

says that she's really a guy, and…

Is allowed out of the kitchen.

A jiggly-puff…

gets eaten 'cause Mudkips mistake it for a marshmallow, and…

It files a lawsuit for racial discrimination…

Jesus christ this thread is terrible.

I know.

@angry:

angry….

In this thread, you are like Peter Griffin in that one episode of Family Guy when they decide to start an improv group, specifically the scene when they're trying to do improv practice by playing that "three-headed-monster" game where they all tell a story and they can only say one word at a time and Peter keeps ruining it by saying "and" over and over and over.

This is what you have done to the thread.

Now back to the point of the fucking thread:

One day a man went to visit the Swiss Alps with his family and…

Caps is all "Moargun why are you here?" so Moargun…

…tells her that she's watching a fistfight (duh). Meanwhile…

…in the hall of justice…

Stevie Wonder dies,

from years of mr.magoo style tomfoolery.

Motavation!

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So, I was walking down this hall, right?

and everybody had matching towels~

Someone went under the dock, and there they found a….

granite crab.

So this tennis racket walks into a bar…

And says, "Hey, who's been hitting my balls?!", so then the tennis racket's wife…

Filed for an untimely divorce, it was grueling and heartwrenching experience for the rest of the racket family.

So 14 homeless people are on a train…

which crashes into a pink tricycle and explodes, leaving hundreds dead and thousands wounded.

So, an Aardvark crabwalked onto…

an octopus.

Crazy nights call for…

Spray paint, a live chicken, and someone with an anus…
Yo' mama is so fat-

THEN WHO WAS PHONE???