Joined Feb 29, 2012 at 09:18PM EST
You know, this Christmas is probably going to be in the top three for me because I’m going to be coaching my younger sister on how to play HALO: THE MASTER CHIEF COLLECTION (who has completed the first five nights of FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY’s) and I am going to be playing WOLF AMONG US with my father (he makes the choices, I push the buttons.) So, yeah, that is going to be fun.
Well, its not like they had any choice in the matter in the whole “Non-White Inclusiveness” thing.
Wait, where is the tweet he is responding to?
I need more context, he might be referring to someone being fired for all we know.
Let’s not jump the gun.
It never said they were HIS intestines.
Who knows? Maybe the guy was just a suit that walks around with…
A Briefcase Full of Guts.
Meanwhile in America…
Don’t forget the whole, “Destroying Kyrati Temples, melting their Treasures down and selling them to the highest bidder, and rounding up all the farmers, taking their land, and forcing them to work in factories” part.
See also, Ed Wuncler III
Devs, my friends, Devs.
You know, the most recent IGDA debacle reminds me of Blisk from Titanfall.
He is a well-off and overhyped mercenary (that specializes in “Urban Pacification”) who could have retired years ago, but instead decides to stay in the game so he could stomp on “terrorists” while shooting down neutrals and unleashing malfunctioning bots that attack enemies and innocents alike (and occasionally friendlies) , he fails at pretty much everything he tries once he starts fighting a force with an actual strategic genius (including protecting valuable data and getting his man/woman), and as soon as his far more experienced Black CO swaps sides and offers him a chance to fight for an independent frontier against a dwindling army consisting entirely of bots and people whose only values are their paycheck, he turns the offer down, cites loyalty to the company, and promises that when the time comes for him to kill the “traitor” he’ll do it for free.
Some inspiring words from Gary for those who are beginning to doubt our motives…
“I’m just a wizened old man who somehow managed to defeat four Jedi Masters single-handedly.”
“Also, I am positively sure that Mace Windu died from the fall, it is not like there is a history of a character surviving a nearly bottomless fall, especially after being cut in half or anything.”
Wait a seconds, why are we so concerned with spoilers? I mean, aren’t we boycotting the game anyway?
I don’t know about you, but if I was in Ajay’s position, I’d chuck the urn into the nearest gorge, grab a car, and drive out of that Himalayan Hell Hole.
FAR CRY 4 SPOILERS BELOW!!!
Ubisoft, you probably think that the reason why people don’t like Far Cry 4 is because they are a bunch of Misogynistic Piss Babies.
I want you to know from the bottom from my heart that this is not true…
Its because the adult characters are a bunch of assholes.
EVERY. SINGLE. ONE.
You know, and this is just my personal opinion, RESPAWN is my ideal for a game developer. These were the people who were booted out of Infinity Ward after the MW2 fiasco, but instead of whining about it, they decided to make their own game. The lawsuit meant for a lot of behind the scenes drama, and, if not for EA picking them up, TITANFALL never would have been made. I’ll admit that it was rather sparse way back in March 2014 when it was released, but since then RESPAWN has been implementing bug fixes, weapons balancing, and boatloads of free content ever since. I’ll leave you with this final question, would you rather give $60 to a company that doesn’t even bother trying to animate female player characters and accuses GAMERGATE of being “terrorists” or would you rather give $30 To the company that literally worked overtime to make sure that the female characters were playable and researches Reddit for Player Feedback?
So wait, let me get this straight, the Topless Women offend them, but when it comes to the player character being buck naked (with Willy the One Eyed Private clearly visible) not thirty seconds later, who cares?
You know, now that Jack Thompson has come out of the woodwork, I’m kind of hoping that another legendary pundit returns from retirement.
He is known by many names,
Melting Pot of Friendship,
and (to himself) A True Capitalist.
But to me,
He will always be,
The Man they call,
It is complicated.
ADVANCED WARFARE: A disastrous second Korean War causes many American Soldiers (such as player character Jack Mitchell, who loses his best friend and his left arm within the first hour of the war) to lose faith in their Government and instead join with the better equipped, better trained PMC Atlas. Atlas exploits the failures of American Foreign Policy to “rebuild” countries that had been battlegrounds in the Cold War and War on Terror, as well as those who had their nuclear reactors destroyed by an anti-technology terrorist group called the KVA. Eventually, one of their “employees” (a female soldier who is actually pretty damn good at her job and survives the entire game) discovers that Atlas had been forewarned of the KVA attack and let it happen anyway so they could become the world’s dominant army. ATLAS then declares war on the United States and unveils their newest weapon, MANTICORE, a biological weapon designed to target individuals who had not been inoculated by ATLAS. The United States Military tries to attack ATLAS’ headquarters, but are annihilated by MANTICORE. You are then captured by ATLAS and imprisoned in what could best be described as “Auschitmo”. While you do manage to escape and kill the ATLAS CEO, ATLAS still holds all the goddamn cards because of their long chain of command, multiple sites around the globe, billions of dollars in defense contracts, and a weapon of mass destruction that makes nuclear weapons look like hand grenades.
BLACK OPS: An American Soldier is captured by the Russians after the Bay of Pigs, turned into a sleeper agent, and spends most of the game being tied to a chair as the CIA tries to jog his memory by alternating between beating him senseless and electrocuting him.
BLACK OPS 2: After the CIA assassinates his father and his sister is killed by a grenade thrown by an American Marine, Raul Menendez (a cartel boss turned “messiah of the 99%”) creates an NGO superpower called CORDIS DIE, which consists of 3rd World Nations that were destabilized due to American and Russian interventions during the Cold War. Thanks to the branching storyline of Black Ops 2 (which gave more player agency than MASS EFFECT 3), there is a 50% chance that the United States Government is destroyed in a violent coup (provided you killed Menendez like every previous COD villain, thus turning him into a martyr), and even the so-called “Golden Ending” (where you spare Menendez and expose him for the vicious psychopath that he is) requires half of your team to die, one by your own hand.
I would like to point out that (with the exception of the clusterfuck that was Call of Duty:Ghosts) that every post WWII Call of Duty game was a variation on the theme “American Intervention in Third World Countries backfires horribly and now you and yours have to lay down your lives before karma catches up to us.”
MODERN WARFARE: Insane American General kickstarts WWIII in order to turn America into an Imperial Power and 90% of the player characters (including a democratically elected president, an astronaut, and a father on vacation in London) die horribly and pointlessly.