“Dr. Coolface uses sadism even though he doesn’t believe in it.” True and accurate. p.s. I hope no one’s implying the wiki was ever good.
Location: In you ( ͡ ° ͜ʖ ͡° )
Joined Apr 06, 2012 at 10:39PM EDT
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“Damn, I hate being right all the time.” Jack grumbled. He walked out of the library. Of course, he had everything he needed in his many deep pockets, but he considered it wise to follow Crow’s plan, him being a magician after all. “This is shaping up to be some adventure.” Jack headed up to the seventh floor, taking a greenish stone out of a pocket and slipping it up his sleeve. “Might need this little luck charm.”
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If you don’t like users making pages for themselves in a negative light, you’re gonna love this
“Well, this sure ain’t just another haunted old building. This goes way deeper than that.” Jack Klaustoffler spoke after pondering quietly. “At first I though the… Queen, wasn’t it?… was some kinda ghost. Y’know… was murdered, haunts the place, spirit needs to be laid to rest, the old schtick.” He turned to Crow. “But something tells me she wasn’t human to begin with, something older and meaner than any spook.”
Hei Faggots,Mi namee is John, n I hate everi sinel one ov u. All ov u r fat, retarded, no-liefs hoo spend everi second ov tehir dai lukin at stupid azz piktures. Yuo r everithin bad in teh werld. Honestli, hav ani ov u ever gotten ani puzi? I meaen, I guess it’s fun makin fun ov people cuz ov ur own insecurities, but u al taek to an hoole new level. This is even worse than jerkin ovf to piktures on facebook.Don’t b an struneder. Just hit mee wit ur bst shot. I’m preti much perfekt. I wuz captain ov teh...
Jack jumped onto a table. “Damn right we will! All for one and one for all, that’s what I say.” He got down and gripped Crow by the shoulders. “Get a hold of yourself man! Snap out of it!”
Super Robo Jesus is the chief deity of our mystery cult, and is not for the ignorant plebeian masses. We must maintain Orthodox SRJ-ism in the face of this populist reform movement.
“Well,” Jack began. “I went down to the casino, just as she was running out of it.” He pointed to Jamie. “Before I went to talk to her, I went to take a look inside. These phantoms were hovering around, but they were being controlled by a woman. She was pale, wore black a dress. I couldn’t see her face on account of her being veiled, but from her body I’d say she was a babe. The way her hands were moving, it was like a puppeteer controlling marionettes. I guess they’re the puppets.” He gestured towards...
Jack glared at the spirits. “This is your fault, you damn spooks.” He decided to try a direct approach. Before Jamie could object, he kicked the doors of the library open and leaped into the room. “Name’s Jack, Jack Klaustoffler.” He tipped his sombrero. “You fellas sure know a lot more than anyone else here I’ve met. Well, I’ve found out a thing or two myself. Such as who those guys,” he pointed at the spirits “are getting orders from. What say we talk it over and get to the bottom of what makes this...
It’s a conflict in the middle east. I shall assume both sides are full of shit, until further notice.
DON’T LOSE YOUR WAAAAAAAAAAAY!
“Wonder where that girl’s gotten off to? Doesn’t matter! Jack Klaustoffler is an expert at tracking women!” He paused a moment. “That came out wrong.” As Jack made his way around the hotel, he took out a dice and rolled it. “Four… this way!” He picked up the dice and went to the library, the ghosts silently trailing behind.
“I don’t suppose any of y’all can talk?” Jack asked the spirits. “How you got here? Or why? No?” Phantasmal fingers reached out to him and he shivered from the chill “Hey watch it!” Jack trembled with excitement, it’s not everyday you got to meet phantoms. “So… do y’all haunt the place often? Or is there something that wakes you up? And what’s with the babe in the red and black?” He gestured towards the casino. The spirits only responded by circling him as a misty haze, evil faces appearing and...
He singlehandedly killed one of the worst dictators in human history. Hitler was an hero.
Jack Klaustoffler intercepted Jamie as she went through the lobby. “Hey there! Yes, you. The name’s Jack.” He tipped his sombrero. “I gotta talk to you about that casino, and if you’ve seen anything else weird in this here hotel.” Jamie looked at him, then quickly looked back back fearfully at the apparitions on the ceiling. Jack noticed them too. “Man, this place has more specter’s than a campfire ghost story. First the fellas in the casino, and now y’all.”
“There’s sure a lot of racket in there, but the doors are locked…. I wonder…” Jack took a penny from his pocket and flipped it, letting it drop on the floor. The coin landed balanced on it’s edge. Then he took a small compass from another pocket, and the needle kept switching between the four cardinal directions. “The rumors were true! This joint’s full of magic and mischief!” Jack grinned and took a couple of thick wires from his coat and picked the casino door’s lock, opened the door a crack, and...
“Thanks a lot, Annabel. Say, when you get off work… well, you know where my room is.” Jack winked and headed towards his room. “Room 777? How portentous can you get?” He admired the gothic decor of the hotel until he reached 777. Upon entering his room, he threw his small duffel bag on the bed. “Now to see what this joint has to offer.” He headed down to the casino.
“Thanks for the ride, man.” Jack Klaustoffler said to the driver of an old chevy “Not a problem, y’all take care.” As the truck drove away, Jack faced the hotel and reached into some of his many coat pockets. He pulled out an astronomical chart for the month and a tarot card “Lessee here… full moon tomorrow night, stars align at midnight in two days… perfect!” He glanced at the card “The Tower, huh? Figures…” Placing the items back into his coat, he walked towards Summer Winds and grinned. “Time to check...