Joined Sep 07, 2011 at 05:34PM EDT
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I took a minute to think about myself; the good, bad and the unnatural. I peeled back any facade that may have been in tact, its purpose to radiate a preferred appearance. Once I believed I saw myself at my core, for what I really am, a realization was on its way. I am a filthy, unrighteous, deluded being who alone am capable of nearly nothing. I am weak. I am wounded, scarred and tarnished. I am undeniably helpless.
But above all of these, I am redeemed.
Always evaluating where we’ve been…always reacting…searching for ways to settle in and find comfort on our sofa-like surroundings…yawning…slumbering in the sleepy, warm twilight of sundown…finding a great deal of security in the mediocrity and predictability of sameness…We are like chatty, laughing tourists taking snapshots of the lowlands through rose-colored filters…enjoying today’s lull…we are yesterday-dwellers…avoiding the reality of today…
Never has a pursuit so rigorously driven me into the ground. Never has a pursuit created in me so much turmoil, strife and ambiguity. Such long nights that have turned to mornings, and days that have been lost in my chasing. Never before has anything gripped me as wildly, yet my desire stays the same. Above all else, I plead one thing.