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Granted, but Natalia Poklonskaya becomes irrelavant

I wish for unlimited wishes

granted, but your wishes have to involve bodily fluids
I wish I was the most powerful jedi in the universe!

Granted, you've embraced both the light and dark side of the force, becoming a true neutral to the Star Wars universe.

I wish for Micheal Bay to make a movie that doesn't involve ruining our childhoods

Granted; it suuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks.

I wish for a Giant Robot.

Granted. But it destroys every life form on Earth, including you.
I wish that Dr. Robotnik from AOSTH was real.

Granted, you never get to meet him.

I wish for corn.

Granted, I ate them

I wish for a Winter Wyvern to appear in Dota 2

Granted, it's not a playable character.

I wish Hollywood would stop unnecessarily adapting books/videogames/etc

Granted, Hollywood will let M.Night Shymalan make a SEQUEL to the Last Airbender

I wish for cookies and cream ice cream

Granted, the cookies are dangerously undercooked, the ice cream is melted.

I wish my waifu was a Mary Sue.

Granted

I wish I had the bat mobile

Granted, but it lost it's wheel, and The Joker got away, Hey!

. . .

I wish I had people to play BF4 with. . .

Granted but BF4 is filled with obnoxious 10 year olds and is laggy

I wish I can bring fictional characters to life and they are friendly to me

Granted….But only Cringeworthy Characters

I wish for Vodka….And Bolts

Granted, you end up Cheeki Breeki-ing until you're killed by a Bloodsucker, then burned by a stray anomaly, then eaten by Pseudodogs. Such is Life In The Zone.

. . .

I wish I got a Survarium Beta Key.

Granted, but I have not the slightest what you said.

I wish for boobs.

Granted, they're on your back.

I wish to co-star in my own '70s style cop show.

Granted, the show sucks, the actors are awful, and the car you get in is made of cardboard.

I wish for bitches. ( ° ͜ °)

Granted, you're given a litter of female dogs.

. . .

I wish I had something to do for spring break.

Granted, you are in charge of cleaning the monkey cage after they got into the laxatives.

I wish to star in a Summer Block-Buster with George Takei as my stern-yet-lovable foster father, Christopher Lee as my bad-ass maternal grandfather; Jennifer Lawrence, Helen Mirren, and why the hell not, Sting, Danny Trejo, and John Malkovich.

Granted, you're an impersonator of Justin Bieber.

I wish for a fish on a dish. Yish.

Granted, you receive a novelty talking fish on a platter. And the play button is permanently jammed on. and it runs dual powered by an Lithium-ion battery and Kinetic energy. The songs will NEVER end.

. . .

I wish GTA V would be ported WELL to PC already!

Granted, you have no time to play it.

I wish to co-star in the stage version of Hamlet with: Patrick Stewart, Tom Hiddleston, Benedict Cumberbatch, and Zooey Deschanel.

Granted, but all deaths aren't acting. Everyone is legitimately killed on stage.

I wish for a perfect understanding of human anatomy and the ability to change my body at will like Mystique.

Granted, you are unable to undo the side effects from such methods that provided your shape shifting abilities

I wish I had both a Green And Blue Lantern ring.

Granted, but then Blackest Night happens, so good luck, buddy.

I wish to be the most controversial rapper in hip hop

Granted, you become so controversial, infamous, and loathed by the music industry that you single-handedly kill the genre as we know it. Nice job breaking it, hero.

. . .

I wish I could hold back these feels from the Kill la Kill finale.

Granted, you become unable to feel FEELS and then you are treated like a monster.

I wish for Nachos.

Wish received

I wish for ice cream rain

Granted, but it's melting ice cream that is extremely hot and bad.

I wish to have Saiyan powers.

Granted, you're under 9000.

I wish all kebabs were removed.

Granted, Shish Kabobs begin to take their place. Get removing.

. . .

I wish Gary would finally get Battlefield 4.

Granted, Shish Kabobs begin to take their place. Get removing.

. . .

I wish Gary would finally get Battlefield 4.

Granted; he doesn't like it.
Granted; he won't play with you

I wish for macaroni and cheese.

Granted, you get macaroni with this guy included

I wish i didn't forgot to make a wish.

Granted. But because you made that wish, it means that you never forgot to make the wish, so now you never made the wish that you didn't forget to make a wish. Now that you didn't make that wish, it means that you forgot to make a wish, and thus you make the wish that you didn't forget to make the wish. Which means that you never forgot to make the wish. But that now means you never made the wish that you didn-
(Universe destroyed by time paradox)

I wish I had an IQ of over 9000.

Granted, you never feel happiness again.

I wish for marshmallows.

Granted, but it's tasteless.

I wish to be right in everything I say.

Granted. However, you are wrong in everything you think, hence whatever you think, the opposite shall become reality. Try not to destroy the universe.

I wish I had a new, brilliant theme song.

Granted, it's critically acclaimed but the audiences hate it.

I wish for my own animated series.

Granted, it's bad. The voices, characters, and the plot are awful.

I wish for tacos.

Granted, they are expired

I wish I had great skills to make a great webcomic of what I want

Granted, but no one likes it and you become clinically depressed.

My wish:

Granted, but you will return alive in one week.

I wish I was a burger :D

Granted, you've been eaten.

I wish everyone would tag their images.

Granted, but the tags would be irrelevant.

I wish I was a good artist.

Granted, you're a really good vore artist with the finest details!

I wish for nothing.

Granted, you lose everything you have and get transported to a void of nothingness where you are left in suspended animation because there's no time there.

I wish for a 1:18 scale model of the F1 World Championship winning McLaren MP4/13 in perfect condition and is immune to damage and entropy.

Granted, it's stolen.

I wish for 2nd breakfast.

Granted, it's expired breakfast burritos that gives you food poisoning.

I wish my wish will not negatively affect me or anyone else anywhere.