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Granted but a terrible fate has happened to you.
I wish I was free

Too bad, Ben. You'll stay in Termina, and you'll friggin' like it.
I wish for a lightsaber.

Ok but you hurt your ONE EYE with it and grow

Instead

I wish I could have my soul back.

fine but im taking the other parts of your shoes.

I wish I had cancer

Cancer has been wiped off the entire planet.
I wish I didn't have to get up so early in the morning.

Wish granted, now you're dead.

I wish I never existed.

So do your parents.

I wish I lived in Hollywood.

Okay, but you live in Britney Spears' bathroom.
I wish she'd be mine
>foreveralone.jpg

Granted, but she gets diabeetus and becomes obese.
I wish /b/ was appropriate for kids.

Granted, but now theres no more nudes
I wish I was a superhero

Granted, but your power is peeling oranges with ease and perfection, Citrus Man!
I wish for an iPhone 4.

wish granted but its not even a phone.
i wish i had a sexy avatar

Granted, it doen't work

I wish I could remember remember the fifth of November.

Granted, but it twas yesterday
i wish for anutha wish

granted but you can only wish for your previous wish
i wish that traps didn't exist

granted, but you are a trap
i wish for more trolls

http://s1005.photobucket.com/albums/af171/ANNHIROanhero/A%20TROLL/

Granted but they're all this troll

I wish all the hetalia fans were thrown in prison.

Granted, but after they got Pheonix Wright as their Attorney, they testified their first ammendment rights and where all released. And Russia kills you with his Sink Pipe.

I wish I knew how to Falcon Punch.

Granted, but you accidentally kill your boss and go to prison. It also has a really long cooldown.
I wish limewire didn't get shutdown.

Granted, but then you get arrested and fined for illegally downloading 500 gigabytes of music, too bad you weren't rich like me, then you coulda just bought them.

I wish I was richer and more smug.

Denied. I'm the smuggest around here.
I wish Grooveshark had Beatles songs.

Granted, but they're low quality and cut short.
I wish my older brother wasn't single.

Ok but he is dating you.
I wish for I was a charmander

Granted, but no one lets you out of yer pokeball. (P.s. I'm a guy!)
I wish Stana Klause would visit my house this christmas.

You don't have a house anymore.
I wish my schoolteacher would die

Granted but she becomes a zombie and kills you.
I wish stupid dildo wotter didn't exist, the sight of him offends my senses.