Forums / Fun! / Riff-Raff

((I feel this should be posted here instead of Video Games because it's not really video games in the strictest sense))

This is a game (I guess) where we condense games in one paragraph.

I'll demonstrate:

Five Nights at Freddy's:

>Take cute thing
>Turn it into robot
>Add creepy eyes
>Hire dumbass guard
>Pay him sh*t
>???
>PROFIT

>beat hookers
>Kill whitey
>run from cops
>steal cars
>Go home
>play vg with goat

Battletoads

>Beating up turtles and eating shrooms is a good way to get money and fuck bitches.

Super Mario Bros.

>Run around
>Shoot things in the face
>Acquire currency

Borderlands 2

>Get drums
>Hit drums
>Kill eyeballs
>March to Earthend

Patapon

h-games taught me how to talk to girls

I can't believe I used to play "Mario is missing".

>get in plane
>shoot down a lot of people
>win war
>become a legend

>Street race to impress girls and get into gangs.
>If the police chase you, just drive really fast and they'll stop looking for you.
>Upgrade your car and you can survive impossible jumps.
>Drifting is a great way to refuel NOS.

Any driving game ever. (Namely "The Crew")

That Slavs are the European equivalent of niggers stereotypical black people Afro-Americans.

Namely WoW on Molten-WoW servers.

>take a nap
>cure any disease and sometimes death

any classic rpg game.

>make friends
>kill god with the power of friendship

Every JRPG I have ever played.

>waste money on hats
>spray porn on the walls
>Whipping asses is fun
>You can fly around and spam rocket launchers
>Suicide Bombing
>Spam ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
>Dancing in a Battlefield is fun
Team Fortress 2: Give us money

>gets shot in the head
>heads across state to kill person who shot you in the head
>join faction
>take over Vegas
Fallout: New Vegas

>get injured in the heat of battle
>freeze time
>put band-aid over injury and then stitch it closed followed by an anti-bacterial treatment
>un-freeze time
>eat food
>heal rapidly
>MGS3

>put people into factories
>make other countries your bitch friend
>make un fair treaties with the said countries
> exploit aid the said countries
> commit genocide spread civilization in Africa
>Ignore reform movements
>get owned by peasant uprising
>Victoria 2

> Kill 1,000 trained soldiers
> Drink a shit ton of alchohol to power up
> Get one-shot by a doofus in pigtails

> Dynasty Wairriors

And then he became the harem king

>buy a green sword
>buy a red sword
>becomes a crossbow

>Dota 2

>ingest shitload of drugs
>become SANIC

Thanks, Morrowind.

Giving your car a paintjob drops you of all charges no matter how big.

>GTA

> Ghandi is a bloodthirsty monster who's nuke crazy.

> Civilizations 5

>cut enemy cyborgs into powder
>drink the cyborg Gatorade cyborgs keep in their spines to become invincible
>fight world's strongest senator
>nanomachines

>Revengeance is now a word

>Get a car
>Smash other cars
>Get crashed
>Respawn
>Repeat

>Burnout series

Always wanted to try that…

"Oh shit its the cops,
Fuck what do I do?
O yeah, new color?
Seems legit"

>Evil Me walks up
>Starts ranting about how I suck and am actually a huge dick.
>Go into denial.
>Evil Self turns into a giant fucking monster.
>Hide like an asshole while my friends beat the shit out of evil me.
>Admit I am an asshole to gain Magical Stand Powers.

>Persona 4

I learned that I hate all my friends ever from Mario kart

I learned that I hate all my friends ever from Mario kart

That a lot of people have apparently met my mother and did some questionable things with her.

In space, you can bang alien females.

Mass Effect.

Oh yeah, if you break barrels you have a free chicken dinner

-every beat'em up ever