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Anon knows what's up. | /r/Greentext


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Anon makes himself a financial liability | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)04:28:56 No.68276468 CH PROBLEMS: >parents want me to get a job >get a job >job is alright for a while >job increasingly sucks >quit job >tax time rolls around 202 KB PNG >mom complains that she can't claim me as a dependent because I made too much money last year Anyone else been reduced to a financial liability lately?
: Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)04:28:56 No.68276468 CH PROBLEMS: >parents want me to get a job >get a job >job is alright for a while >job increasingly sucks >quit job >tax time rolls around 202 KB PNG >mom complains that she can't claim me as a dependent because I made too much money last year Anyone else been reduced to a financial liability lately?

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Anon has long hair | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)04:26:54 No.876539631 >be me, tall guy with long hair >in mall yesterday with girl >it's our third date and she's pretty hot >she wants to try on bikinis and see what I think >f--- yeah 29 KB JPG >go into shop and start walking to the changing room area after she grabs a few sets >employee lady stops me and says it's women only >roll my eyes >girl says I identify as a woman sarcastically >employee doesn't pick up on the joke and starts groveling in apologies >tell her it's NOT okay and we proceed to changing room >employee feels bad and gives girl discount on our way out while almost in tears
: Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)04:26:54 No.876539631 >be me, tall guy with long hair >in mall yesterday with girl >it's our third date and she's pretty hot >she wants to try on bikinis and see what I think >f--- yeah 29 KB JPG >go into shop and start walking to the changing room area after she grabs a few sets >employee lady stops me and says it's women only >roll my eyes >girl says I identify as a woman sarcastically >employee doesn't pick up on the joke and starts groveling in apologies >tell her it's NOT okay and we proceed to changing room >employee feels bad and gives girl discount on our way out while almost in tears

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Anon watches 13 reasons why | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 769156213 2 hr ago >Depressed teen >Tell parents >They somehow think f----- 13 reasons why is the source of my depression and i shouldn't watch the Why noald deal gied lie! ANETFLIX OINAL SERIES second season B REASONS WHY >F----- lul >l try to tell them that its good because it opens up conversation about important issues >They just shout at me, disregarding my opinions, as per 6.7 kB JPG >wat do 19 REPLIES 8 IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 769156270 2 hr ago >>769156213 (OP) kill urself to prove them wrong lol
Anonymous | 769156213 2 hr ago >Depressed teen >Tell parents >They somehow think f----- 13 reasons why is the source of my depression and i shouldn't watch the Why noald deal gied lie! ANETFLIX OINAL SERIES second season B REASONS WHY >F----- lul >l try to tell them that its good because it opens up conversation about important issues >They just shout at me, disregarding my opinions, as per 6.7 kB JPG >wat do 19 REPLIES 8 IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 769156270 2 hr ago >>769156213 (OP) kill urself to prove them wrong lol

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anon is a schizo | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 0 minutes ago 876540167 >Be me 26 year old Schizo >6'1 Attractive well groomed. >Work at lawncare service. >just got off work and went to my favorite kava bar. >No one bothers me and I can f--- around on my laptop while I drink tea. >Female Bartender who always serves me is attempting to make small talk. >l keep giving her 1 off answers. >"Jeez anon, your always so quiet. Why don't I ever see you with any girls." >"Because I'm a paranoid schizophrenic." >"what?" >Look her in the eyes. >I hear voices that constantly talk s--- about me with my family members and coworkers voices. On a few occasions I have heard you speaking when you werent even in the shop." >she looked at me before hastily retreating to the backroom. >Leave before she can come back out. What do you think /b/ should I go back or is that place just a lost cause now?
Anonymous 0 minutes ago 876540167 >Be me 26 year old Schizo >6'1 Attractive well groomed. >Work at lawncare service. >just got off work and went to my favorite kava bar. >No one bothers me and I can f--- around on my laptop while I drink tea. >Female Bartender who always serves me is attempting to make small talk. >l keep giving her 1 off answers. >"Jeez anon, your always so quiet. Why don't I ever see you with any girls." >"Because I'm a paranoid schizophrenic." >"what?" >Look her in the eyes. >I hear voices that constantly talk s--- about me with my family members and coworkers voices. On a few occasions I have heard you speaking when you werent even in the shop." >she looked at me before hastily retreating to the backroom. >Leave before she can come back out. What do you think /b/ should I go back or is that place just a lost cause now?

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Hopeless anon wants to end it | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/27/17(Fri)21:35:51 No.749334696 > Dead end job. > Haven't been on a date in 7 years. > The city I live in is insanely overpriced when it comes to houses, so l'll never own a house. > The girl I like at work has been distant the past few weeks. Worried she's banging a chad. > I'm older than my dad was when I was born. Decent chance my parents will never see grandkids. Should I commit sudoku? >749334992 #
: Anonymous 10/27/17(Fri)21:35:51 No.749334696 > Dead end job. > Haven't been on a date in 7 years. > The city I live in is insanely overpriced when it comes to houses, so l'll never own a house. > The girl I like at work has been distant the past few weeks. Worried she's banging a chad. > I'm older than my dad was when I was born. Decent chance my parents will never see grandkids. Should I commit sudoku? >749334992 #

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Anon got rejeced by a hooker | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/20/20(Thu)15:56:42 No.56824702 How do you manage pain? >decided to bite the bullet and get a h----- >find most good looking cheapest w---- near where i live >call her and we start talking >»"you sound a bit nervous,are you a virgin?" >"Y-yes i'm a virgin" Exereoga enobuprofen Alct Accuncture/Massage Heroir G Pescririon pain meds mply lve h the pain Vote View results Seamore nolls 105 KB JPG >>"I'm sorry,i don't service virgins anymore.l feel super guilty afterwards." >she hangs up Nothing makes you feel more alive like being truned down by litteral prostitute,real confidence boost! 9 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 02/20/20(Thu)15:56:42 No.56824702 How do you manage pain? >decided to bite the bullet and get a h----- >find most good looking cheapest w---- near where i live >call her and we start talking >»"you sound a bit nervous,are you a virgin?" >"Y-yes i'm a virgin" Exereoga enobuprofen Alct Accuncture/Massage Heroir G Pescririon pain meds mply lve h the pain Vote View results Seamore nolls 105 KB JPG >>"I'm sorry,i don't service virgins anymore.l feel super guilty afterwards." >she hangs up Nothing makes you feel more alive like being truned down by litteral prostitute,real confidence boost! 9 Replies View Thread

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Anon doesn't understand hints | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)03:44:57 No.876537913 > a girl i know since high school > used to help her with her exams, (I am the nerdy guy) > time passed > being friend on facebook for a while > start liking, sharing all my retard 24 KB JPG memes posts > dm'ing me first, insisting to hangout asap > meeting day > mfw when she suddenly grab my neck toward her chest, hug and kisses me in the cheek > mfw when she keeps holding my shoulder while sitting at the park > time to go, say goodbye, grab my hand and kisses me again in intimate and a weird way W-- is wrong with this bitch? Can some of you retard expert f--- explain? 2 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)03:44:57 No.876537913 > a girl i know since high school > used to help her with her exams, (I am the nerdy guy) > time passed > being friend on facebook for a while > start liking, sharing all my retard 24 KB JPG memes posts > dm'ing me first, insisting to hangout asap > meeting day > mfw when she suddenly grab my neck toward her chest, hug and kisses me in the cheek > mfw when she keeps holding my shoulder while sitting at the park > time to go, say goodbye, grab my hand and kisses me again in intimate and a weird way W-- is wrong with this bitch? Can some of you retard expert f--- explain? 2 Replies View Thread

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anon is an incel | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/18/22(Mon)11:16:32 No.68266754 >9yo sister just called me an incel OVER. 15 KB PNG
: Anonymous 04/18/22(Mon)11:16:32 No.68266754 >9yo sister just called me an incel OVER. 15 KB PNG

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Anon inspects his electronics | /r/Greentext

ile: 1648687347683.jpg (5 KB, 250x187) Anonymous 03/31/22(Thu)03:43:05 No.8628440e > >>86284428 >>86284589>>86284605 >>86284634 >>86284639 >>86284956 >>86287913 >>86287940 >>86288066 >>86289339 >>86289875 >buy wireless device >look inside >wires
ile: 1648687347683.jpg (5 KB, 250x187) Anonymous 03/31/22(Thu)03:43:05 No.8628440e > >>86284428 >>86284589>>86284605 >>86284634 >>86284639 >>86284956 >>86287913 >>86287940 >>86288066 >>86289339 >>86289875 >buy wireless device >look inside >wires

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Anon wants an Azov gf | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: iG/Fy4w1 04/18/22(Mon)21:46:39 No.14996650 A30B Now all jokes aside, the idea of an Azov gf is pretty appealing to me. Imagine an innocent looking waifu who is actually a fascist who wants to burn children of "inferior" races. You, of course, would be the responsible one, calming her down and suggesting that Putin may be not that 181 KB PNG bad. I am obviously assuming she is good looking otherwise she thoroughly deserves to be nuked that crazy bitch. : Anonymous (ID: 6FN3DBJA ) - 04/18/22(Mon)21:47:28 No.14996653 shut the f--- up retarded incel
: Anonymous (ID: iG/Fy4w1 04/18/22(Mon)21:46:39 No.14996650 A30B Now all jokes aside, the idea of an Azov gf is pretty appealing to me. Imagine an innocent looking waifu who is actually a fascist who wants to burn children of "inferior" races. You, of course, would be the responsible one, calming her down and suggesting that Putin may be not that 181 KB PNG bad. I am obviously assuming she is good looking otherwise she thoroughly deserves to be nuked that crazy bitch. : Anonymous (ID: 6FN3DBJA ) - 04/18/22(Mon)21:47:28 No.14996653 shut the f--- up retarded incel

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Anon has a loicense | /r/Greentext

Typical everyday average British morning: >wake up >bobby knocks on door >"oi! open up you cheeky bastard and show me your 47 KB JPG sleeping licence!" >fumble around and finally find my licence >"s-sorry good sir. It's right here.. God save the Queen." >bobby peers in and catches a glimpse of me telly >"halt! where's your TV licence you c---?!" >"draw TV licence from me wallet" >bobby gives a look like the bloody Queen's dodger >"oi mate! where's your permit for this licence?" >show him my licence permit >"this licence permit is expired. l'm taking you in!" >bobby draws his toy gun >stab him with my unregistered butterknife
Typical everyday average British morning: >wake up >bobby knocks on door >"oi! open up you cheeky bastard and show me your 47 KB JPG sleeping licence!" >fumble around and finally find my licence >"s-sorry good sir. It's right here.. God save the Queen." >bobby peers in and catches a glimpse of me telly >"halt! where's your TV licence you c---?!" >"draw TV licence from me wallet" >bobby gives a look like the bloody Queen's dodger >"oi mate! where's your permit for this licence?" >show him my licence permit >"this licence permit is expired. l'm taking you in!" >bobby draws his toy gun >stab him with my unregistered butterknife

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Anon gets a gf. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/18/22(Mon)14:35:37 No.68271805 PS5 TIME SCHEDULE Foot Rub = 30 minutas og playing time Back Bub = 40 minuts 8 playing time CoOk Dinnee= 1 Houe playing time CNo Online) Take out Teash = 1 Game og 2K Only! (fromhure hs moh a) Clean the House =2 Houes playing time (* rnust take 30 minute beiak foe affLotion) *unlimited playtime on Sundays ONLY * NO playtime on holidays! - If Violation of this schedule occues, your PS5 wil be sold to Smalt Pawn on Teoost. - wigey 936 KB JPG >get a gf bro, it will be fun
Anonymous 04/18/22(Mon)14:35:37 No.68271805 PS5 TIME SCHEDULE Foot Rub = 30 minutas og playing time Back Bub = 40 minuts 8 playing time CoOk Dinnee= 1 Houe playing time CNo Online) Take out Teash = 1 Game og 2K Only! (fromhure hs moh a) Clean the House =2 Houes playing time (* rnust take 30 minute beiak foe affLotion) *unlimited playtime on Sundays ONLY * NO playtime on holidays! - If Violation of this schedule occues, your PS5 wil be sold to Smalt Pawn on Teoost. - wigey 936 KB JPG >get a gf bro, it will be fun

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Anon gets his revenge | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 24 minutes ago 42946598 >neighbours dog bit me while I was riding my bicycle and always wakes me up during the day >piss in one of my mums pans >put piss in freezer >make frozen piss disk >go to neighbours house at 1am >slide the piss disk under their front door >next day visit their place to ask if they have any spare eggs and ask what happened >they tell me their dog p----- on the carpet >continue sliding piss disks under their door every few days for the next 3 months >find out they gave away their dog on craigslist 1 REPLY
Anonymous 24 minutes ago 42946598 >neighbours dog bit me while I was riding my bicycle and always wakes me up during the day >piss in one of my mums pans >put piss in freezer >make frozen piss disk >go to neighbours house at 1am >slide the piss disk under their front door >next day visit their place to ask if they have any spare eggs and ask what happened >they tell me their dog p----- on the carpet >continue sliding piss disks under their door every few days for the next 3 months >find out they gave away their dog on craigslist 1 REPLY

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Based indeed, anon. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)00:41:20 No.876521328 I miss the 30's so much! >Hitting wemon, based >Killing men, based >Stealing propeety, based >Killing inocent animals, based >Robbing graves, based >Sleeping with female students, superbased 137 KB JPG >Trespassing, based Anyone else wants to go back to simpler times? : Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)00:46:33 No.876521586 >30 year life expectancy, based
: Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)00:41:20 No.876521328 I miss the 30's so much! >Hitting wemon, based >Killing men, based >Stealing propeety, based >Killing inocent animals, based >Robbing graves, based >Sleeping with female students, superbased 137 KB JPG >Trespassing, based Anyone else wants to go back to simpler times? : Anonymous 04/19/22(Tue)00:46:33 No.876521586 >30 year life expectancy, based

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Anon is an asshole | /r/Greentext


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Anon asking the big questions | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/18/22(Mon)10:59:46 No.68269334 >staying stationary causes you to fall over >pedaling magically makes you balance How the f---? 230 KB JPG
: Anonymous 04/18/22(Mon)10:59:46 No.68269334 >staying stationary causes you to fall over >pedaling magically makes you balance How the f---? 230 KB JPG

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Anon has an idea for a movie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Movie idea 07/29/21(Thu)13:47:06 No.154240634 >aliens come to earth >tell humanity that it must choose one of its races to be eliminated before they share their knowledge and tech >a worldwide anonymous poll is held where you just have to think of which race to get rid of (none is 20 KB JPG an option as well) >plot twist: as the poll ends everyone who voted for a certain race gets a corresponding symbol tattooed on their face >aliens instantly leave without purging anyone or saying a word >chaos ensues
: Anonymous Movie idea 07/29/21(Thu)13:47:06 No.154240634 >aliens come to earth >tell humanity that it must choose one of its races to be eliminated before they share their knowledge and tech >a worldwide anonymous poll is held where you just have to think of which race to get rid of (none is 20 KB JPG an option as well) >plot twist: as the poll ends everyone who voted for a certain race gets a corresponding symbol tattooed on their face >aliens instantly leave without purging anyone or saying a word >chaos ensues

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Anonette is aging like a fine wine | /r/Greentext

Am I aging okay? 2008-2019. I'm aging like a fine wine, glad I'm not 18 years old, 28 is looking good on me. #howgooddidyouage #10yeardifference #seniorpictures #bathroompicture 1621994509863.jpg 91 KB JPG Copium-60 >>68263342 # >>68263351 # >>68263355 # >>68263381 # >>68263382 # >>68264177 # >>68264299 # >>68265234 # Anonymous 04/17/22(Sun)22:25:28 No.68263382 >>68263334 # bitch is literally turning into a planet of the apes character
Am I aging okay? 2008-2019. I'm aging like a fine wine, glad I'm not 18 years old, 28 is looking good on me. #howgooddidyouage #10yeardifference #seniorpictures #bathroompicture 1621994509863.jpg 91 KB JPG Copium-60 >>68263342 # >>68263351 # >>68263355 # >>68263381 # >>68263382 # >>68264177 # >>68264299 # >>68265234 # Anonymous 04/17/22(Sun)22:25:28 No.68263382 >>68263334 # bitch is literally turning into a planet of the apes character

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Anon explains why males have it worse than females | /r/Greentext

why women have it easier than men >male:female suicide ratio is about 4:1 in most western countries yet nothing is done about it 60 KB JPG >woman are allowed to bitch about whatever they want, men are expected to just cop it on the chin >ugly awkward men will be called autists whereas ugly awkward women will be labelled 'cute' >men are still expected to make the first move and pay for first date the world is retard /b/ and is only going to get worse
why women have it easier than men >male:female suicide ratio is about 4:1 in most western countries yet nothing is done about it 60 KB JPG >woman are allowed to bitch about whatever they want, men are expected to just cop it on the chin >ugly awkward men will be called autists whereas ugly awkward women will be labelled 'cute' >men are still expected to make the first move and pay for first date the world is retard /b/ and is only going to get worse

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