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Anon eats semen | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/29/18(Sat)20:03:26 No.7811215 >be me >still inside my mom because fetus >I get fed through the umbilical cord >part of what mom eats is my food >mom sucks dads d--- and swallows >c-- goes into umbilical cord >l eat my dads c-- 312 KB PNG >mfw lI'm a f-----
: Anonymous 09/29/18(Sat)20:03:26 No.7811215 >be me >still inside my mom because fetus >I get fed through the umbilical cord >part of what mom eats is my food >mom sucks dads d--- and swallows >c-- goes into umbilical cord >l eat my dads c-- 312 KB PNG >mfw lI'm a f-----

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Anon feels regret | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/19/18(Tue)21:11:42 No.46230458 >Hey Anon, it's me your government-mandated girlfriend! 387 KB PNG 38 Replies / 6 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 06/19/18(Tue)21:11:42 No.46230458 >Hey Anon, it's me your government-mandated girlfriend! 387 KB PNG 38 Replies / 6 Images View Thread

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Anon notices something fishy | /r/Greentext

I Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)19:06:30 No.876299472 [Reply] 2876299748 22876300351 >be me >browsing plebbit >on a sub populated by t----- f------ >see a meme calling all catholic priests pedophiles >Real, but ironic being called out by trannies >look up what percentage of catholic priests are pedophiles Sget flat rate of 1.8%, ez find >look up what percentage of trannies are pedophiles >sift through a thousand files of sniveling sneedsuckers all claiming that there is no link between being Igbt and p--------- >despite me only searching for a percentage, even with multiple different names, the topic is entirely avoided, the only thing being explained is that there is no link >no statistics available anywhere. If they're hiding the numbers that bad, they have to be big.
I Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)19:06:30 No.876299472 [Reply] 2876299748 22876300351 >be me >browsing plebbit >on a sub populated by t----- f------ >see a meme calling all catholic priests pedophiles >Real, but ironic being called out by trannies >look up what percentage of catholic priests are pedophiles Sget flat rate of 1.8%, ez find >look up what percentage of trannies are pedophiles >sift through a thousand files of sniveling sneedsuckers all claiming that there is no link between being Igbt and p--------- >despite me only searching for a percentage, even with multiple different names, the topic is entirely avoided, the only thing being explained is that there is no link >no statistics available anywhere. If they're hiding the numbers that bad, they have to be big.

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anon is chad | /r/Greentext


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Fem anon has the power | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/19/18(Tue)13:04:53 No.771994595 >be fem anon >making fun of tendi bf >call him "the virgin" >waitasec.jpeg > mfw realize i have the power to 12 KB JPG make chads
: Anonymous 06/19/18(Tue)13:04:53 No.771994595 >be fem anon >making fun of tendi bf >call him "the virgin" >waitasec.jpeg > mfw realize i have the power to 12 KB JPG make chads

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Anon is a relatable mess | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)22:18:13 No.876305571 >ugly >10/10 social anxiety >0/10 confidence >pandemic.gif >masks.jpg >hide my ugly face >stay at home 90% of the time 84 KB JPG >4/10 social anxiety >3/10 confidence Global disaster, personal growth I'm healing /b/
: Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)22:18:13 No.876305571 >ugly >10/10 social anxiety >0/10 confidence >pandemic.gif >masks.jpg >hide my ugly face >stay at home 90% of the time 84 KB JPG >4/10 social anxiety >3/10 confidence Global disaster, personal growth I'm healing /b/

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Anon is scared of school shooters | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/26/19(Wed)02:41:55 No.803189740 >be me >paranoid of school shooters >watched documentary about Elliot Rodger and wonder if that could happen at my school >everybody is suspect >have terrifying nightmares about 22 KB PNG being gunned down at school >always first to die because I'm the slowest one in my class >seek therapy >therapist tells me to deal with it >take my therapists advice >one day when dad isn't home, I go into his closet and take his BERSA Model 383 >hide it in my backpack on my way to school next day >go behind the art building where all the school shooters hang out >shoot two of them while the other seven run away >manage to reload and shoot another before they managed to shoot anymore innocent people >police show up and I tell them the direction the other school shooters ran >mfw they arrest me instead of thanking me for doing their job for them
: Anonymous 06/26/19(Wed)02:41:55 No.803189740 >be me >paranoid of school shooters >watched documentary about Elliot Rodger and wonder if that could happen at my school >everybody is suspect >have terrifying nightmares about 22 KB PNG being gunned down at school >always first to die because I'm the slowest one in my class >seek therapy >therapist tells me to deal with it >take my therapists advice >one day when dad isn't home, I go into his closet and take his BERSA Model 383 >hide it in my backpack on my way to school next day >go behind the art building where all the school shooters hang out >shoot two of them while the other seven run away >manage to reload and shoot another before they managed to shoot anymore innocent people >police show up and I tell them the direction the other school shooters ran >mfw they arrest me instead of thanking me for doing their job for them

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anon knows better | /r/Greentext


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Anon learns about inflation | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)17:07:50 No.876290619 >grow up poor >"I'm goin to get my family out of poverty by making lots of money" >hear about 6 figure salary all the time so make that the goal >spend all my twenties working towards getting the desired job 79 KB JPG >be 29 >get 6 figure salary > >quality of life is the same W--?
: Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)17:07:50 No.876290619 >grow up poor >"I'm goin to get my family out of poverty by making lots of money" >hear about 6 figure salary all the time so make that the goal >spend all my twenties working towards getting the desired job 79 KB JPG >be 29 >get 6 figure salary > >quality of life is the same W--?

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She's the bomb | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)12:11:21 No.62341896 fabc35dee775bcdac2ffa64de4c75e860560139768986e54fb0a433e5 90 KB JPG >Hey anon. I'm back. *kisses you* >God, you have such cute blue eyes.*strokes your hair* >My feet are so tired, have been killing palestinians all day. Will you give me a foot rub?
: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)12:11:21 No.62341896 fabc35dee775bcdac2ffa64de4c75e860560139768986e54fb0a433e5 90 KB JPG >Hey anon. I'm back. *kisses you* >God, you have such cute blue eyes.*strokes your hair* >My feet are so tired, have been killing palestinians all day. Will you give me a foot rub?

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Hello there, my sister | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/03/19(Sun)02:46:20 No.791658710 >be me >post true greentext about jacking off into my sisters panties >gets on reddit >sister is redditfag >shows me the story >fake laugh and spaghetti all over 25 KB PNG the floor >make up excuse about violent diarrhea before leaving >return all stolen panties >mfw this makes it on reddit too hi emma
: Anonymous 02/03/19(Sun)02:46:20 No.791658710 >be me >post true greentext about jacking off into my sisters panties >gets on reddit >sister is redditfag >shows me the story >fake laugh and spaghetti all over 25 KB PNG the floor >make up excuse about violent diarrhea before leaving >return all stolen panties >mfw this makes it on reddit too hi emma

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Anon is a victim | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)04:36:08 No.52685126 >>52683366 (OP) # >wife is Ukrainian >order her a cat tail buttplug and cat ears from Etsy >war starts the moment we're ready to try it >she hasn't been in the mood to try it for a whole month I'm a victim too. >>52685185 # >>52685934 # >>52686273 #
: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)04:36:08 No.52685126 >>52683366 (OP) # >wife is Ukrainian >order her a cat tail buttplug and cat ears from Etsy >war starts the moment we're ready to try it >she hasn't been in the mood to try it for a whole month I'm a victim too. >>52685185 # >>52685934 # >>52686273 #

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Anon is Czech | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/13/15(Sat)11:22:09 No.621492508 >>621489589 (OP) # >be Czech >15 >having the d--- masturbate >a girl love me asked for the f--- >we f------ >her breasts grew to the f--- >she putting my d--- in mouth >feeling the c-- >sorry to in mouth >marry her >having the kid >Still having the f--- apologize for bad english >>621492743 # >>621492822 # >>621493035 #
Anonymous 06/13/15(Sat)11:22:09 No.621492508 >>621489589 (OP) # >be Czech >15 >having the d--- masturbate >a girl love me asked for the f--- >we f------ >her breasts grew to the f--- >she putting my d--- in mouth >feeling the c-- >sorry to in mouth >marry her >having the kid >Still having the f--- apologize for bad english >>621492743 # >>621492822 # >>621493035 #

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Anon opens up to his girlfriend (noob lol) | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 03/11/22(Fri)13:50:12 No.874217538 >>874217696 >>874218782 >>874219047 >>874219113 >>874219217 >>874219486 >>874220608 >>874222092 >>874222868 >be me >4/10 >somehow get in relationship with amazing sweet 9/10 qt (probably cause she has major self image issues) >be together for 5+ years >thinking about marriage >also be me >had a lot of trauma in the past >become sexually submissive as a result >mask for 5 years but not well enough >sex is a little awkward >she knows something is off and starts pestering me to open up to her >refuse for 5+ years >finally cave and tell her everything last week >she promises she doesnt see me any differently >quickly becomes more distant >starts shying away from my touch >be today >she breaks things off because things "arent working out" its over its so f------ over im going to f------ kill myself. i never should have trusted her to not dump me the moment i showed any weakness because thats just how women are. also f--- you reddit this is not for your amusement, please kill yourself you n------. Anonymous (ID: 7wbvzvHM ) E03/21/22(Mon)08:18:12 No.368455982 >>368427530 I think this was the start of the downfall in my previous relationship. I opened up about my depression and from that moment on I think I was far weaker in her eyes. I think women look for a father figure in their husband and I cant imagine any father bitching about their weaknesses to their daughters. Maybe stoicism was the solution for this life all along. But im an incel, what do I know
O Anonymous 03/11/22(Fri)13:50:12 No.874217538 >>874217696 >>874218782 >>874219047 >>874219113 >>874219217 >>874219486 >>874220608 >>874222092 >>874222868 >be me >4/10 >somehow get in relationship with amazing sweet 9/10 qt (probably cause she has major self image issues) >be together for 5+ years >thinking about marriage >also be me >had a lot of trauma in the past >become sexually submissive as a result >mask for 5 years but not well enough >sex is a little awkward >she knows something is off and starts pestering me to open up to her >refuse for 5+ years >finally cave and tell her everything last week >she promises she doesnt see me any differently >quickly becomes more distant >starts shying away from my touch >be today >she breaks things off because things "arent working out" its over its so f------ over im going to f------ kill myself. i never should have trusted her to not dump me the moment i showed any weakness because thats just how women are. also f--- you reddit this is not for your amusement, please kill yourself you n------. Anonymous (ID: 7wbvzvHM ) E03/21/22(Mon)08:18:12 No.368455982 >>368427530 I think this was the start of the downfall in my previous relationship. I opened up about my depression and from that moment on I think I was far weaker in her eyes. I think women look for a father figure in their husband and I cant imagine any father bitching about their weaknesses to their daughters. Maybe stoicism was the solution for this life all along. But im an incel, what do I know

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Anon does a little tomfoolery | /r/Greentext

>got my brother's spare key because we live a walking distance away >we buy the same kind of bread because that's the same one we had at home 85 KB JPG >he's a man of schedule, goes shopping the same day every week, he goes on the same walk at the same time of day every day >always hated how irregular my habits are >decide to be a s------- for no reason >get a bag of bread on the same day he's gone shopping >toast the entire thing and put it back in the bag >wait until it's time for brother's walk >take my bag of toast and sneak in with my keys >know where he keeps his bread, switch the bag of bread with the bag of toast >toast two slices of bread to make the whole house smell like toast >escape once they're done >make sure I left no mark in the house, touch nothing >make it to home, start gaming >25 minutes later I get a text "I don't know how or why you've done this but I will f------ end you."
>got my brother's spare key because we live a walking distance away >we buy the same kind of bread because that's the same one we had at home 85 KB JPG >he's a man of schedule, goes shopping the same day every week, he goes on the same walk at the same time of day every day >always hated how irregular my habits are >decide to be a s------- for no reason >get a bag of bread on the same day he's gone shopping >toast the entire thing and put it back in the bag >wait until it's time for brother's walk >take my bag of toast and sneak in with my keys >know where he keeps his bread, switch the bag of bread with the bag of toast >toast two slices of bread to make the whole house smell like toast >escape once they're done >make sure I left no mark in the house, touch nothing >make it to home, start gaming >25 minutes later I get a text "I don't know how or why you've done this but I will f------ end you."

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Anon wears make up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/04/19(Fri)10:01:52 No.789087152 >be me >always felt like I should've been a woman >one day while I was sitting in the living room with my parents it really gets to me >I get up and go to the upstairs 195 KB JPG bathroom, put my moms make up on >feelsgood.wav >come back down stairs with make up on >this is it, I'm gonna tell them >as I turn the corner to the living room I hear my parents talking >my mom says "anon is just a little awkward, he's just young" >my dad says "yeah....you're right, at least he isn't some kind of Faggo-“ >mfw when they turn and see me in make up >mfw my dad hasn't talked to me in 2 days and just looks collosally disappointed every time he sees me
: Anonymous 01/04/19(Fri)10:01:52 No.789087152 >be me >always felt like I should've been a woman >one day while I was sitting in the living room with my parents it really gets to me >I get up and go to the upstairs 195 KB JPG bathroom, put my moms make up on >feelsgood.wav >come back down stairs with make up on >this is it, I'm gonna tell them >as I turn the corner to the living room I hear my parents talking >my mom says "anon is just a little awkward, he's just young" >my dad says "yeah....you're right, at least he isn't some kind of Faggo-“ >mfw when they turn and see me in make up >mfw my dad hasn't talked to me in 2 days and just looks collosally disappointed every time he sees me

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Anon tries makeup. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)12:02:00 No.68215123 >be me >have gf, life is good >gf oftentimes complains about makeup being difficult to put on, taking too long etc >be good bf and act sympathetic >think to myself makeup cant be harder than painting minis >ffw to today 39 KB JPG >gf is gone for uni >finish painting my primaris eliminator squad >whatnow.jpg >remember gf bitching about makeup >decide to put her makeup on myself >its easy af >first the primer ("foundation" in makeup speak) >put on eyeshadow, colours are easy af to combine and blend >put on mascara >have a raging erection the whole time what is the meaning of this robobros
Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)12:02:00 No.68215123 >be me >have gf, life is good >gf oftentimes complains about makeup being difficult to put on, taking too long etc >be good bf and act sympathetic >think to myself makeup cant be harder than painting minis >ffw to today 39 KB JPG >gf is gone for uni >finish painting my primaris eliminator squad >whatnow.jpg >remember gf bitching about makeup >decide to put her makeup on myself >its easy af >first the primer ("foundation" in makeup speak) >put on eyeshadow, colours are easy af to combine and blend >put on mascara >have a raging erection the whole time what is the meaning of this robobros

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Anon meets an old friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)15:43:00 No.68213729 >be me >go to my friend's house >another guy is there >he says my name, then shakes my hand >i reply "oh nice, we have the same name" >mfw he was my old friend for years and i couldn't recognize him >mfw he has a different name, so he just 31 KB JPG called me >mfw i'm retarded i till remember this sometimes
: Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)15:43:00 No.68213729 >be me >go to my friend's house >another guy is there >he says my name, then shakes my hand >i reply "oh nice, we have the same name" >mfw he was my old friend for years and i couldn't recognize him >mfw he has a different name, so he just 31 KB JPG called me >mfw i'm retarded i till remember this sometimes

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Anon leaves a review on steam | /r/Greentext

1574216726259.png 344 KB PNG >Leave a steam review on a small game bashing it with negative rating >Dev replies
1574216726259.png 344 KB PNG >Leave a steam review on a small game bashing it with negative rating >Dev replies

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Anon is different | /r/Greentext

File: 1649040267778.png (3 KB, 30x30) U Fembot Thread Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)06:06:24 No.68208444 >>68211153 >>68212514 List 10 things about men that give you the ick Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)06:13:39 No.68208524 D 2268208847 226820895 >he owns 2 pairs of shoes >he reheats his coffee in the microwave >he keeps medication in the bathroom >he has zits on his thighs >he has curly hair >he wears flipflops >his kitchen is too tidy >he owns a lizard >he has black, navy, or hunter green bedsheets >he drinks beer straight from the can Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)06:38:44 No.68208847 D 2>68209004 File: maxresdefault jpg (70 KB, 1280x720) >>68208524 >he owns 2 pairs of shoes i own 2 pairs of shoes >he reheats his coffee in the microwave i dont drink coffee, i drink energy drinks >he keeps medication in the bathroom keep it next to my bed >he has zits on his thighs rarely >he has curly hair big curls only because i have long hair >he wears flipflops i wear flipflops when im too lazy to put on socks >his kitchen is too tidy my kitchen is always a f------ disaster >he owns a lizard who the f--- owns lizards >he has black, navy, or hunter green bedsheets i uh rarely put on bedsheets but when i do they are white >he drinks beer straight from the can i dont drink beer so.? ladies??? im single btw haha
File: 1649040267778.png (3 KB, 30x30) U Fembot Thread Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)06:06:24 No.68208444 >>68211153 >>68212514 List 10 things about men that give you the ick Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)06:13:39 No.68208524 D 2268208847 226820895 >he owns 2 pairs of shoes >he reheats his coffee in the microwave >he keeps medication in the bathroom >he has zits on his thighs >he has curly hair >he wears flipflops >his kitchen is too tidy >he owns a lizard >he has black, navy, or hunter green bedsheets >he drinks beer straight from the can Anonymous 04/14/22(Thu)06:38:44 No.68208847 D 2>68209004 File: maxresdefault jpg (70 KB, 1280x720) >>68208524 >he owns 2 pairs of shoes i own 2 pairs of shoes >he reheats his coffee in the microwave i dont drink coffee, i drink energy drinks >he keeps medication in the bathroom keep it next to my bed >he has zits on his thighs rarely >he has curly hair big curls only because i have long hair >he wears flipflops i wear flipflops when im too lazy to put on socks >his kitchen is too tidy my kitchen is always a f------ disaster >he owns a lizard who the f--- owns lizards >he has black, navy, or hunter green bedsheets i uh rarely put on bedsheets but when i do they are white >he drinks beer straight from the can i dont drink beer so.? ladies??? im single btw haha

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