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Anon is hurt | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)10:37:36 No.160409292 1639129054101.jpg 273 KB JPG >watch friend simulator podcast >they start making fun of friendless guys like me
: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)10:37:36 No.160409292 1639129054101.jpg 273 KB JPG >watch friend simulator podcast >they start making fun of friendless guys like me

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Anon beats the game | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)22:19:00 No.66508853 >be me >23 >never had a gf before >decide to put into plan a basic idea I had years ago 48 KB JPG >only go after fat girls >spend a lot of time looking at very good looking women online who used to be fat >can now tell easily whether a fat woman would be very attractive if she lost the weight >fat girls are easier to date, they're most of my tinder matches, they're the ones who react the most positively to cold approaching >find a literal 10/10 a---- goddess but she's tall and fat, looks like s--- but you can tell there's potential under all that fat >ask her out and she says yes, very enthusiastic about it, have very pleasant date >lose my virginity to her, she was also a virgin (something i found to be very common among fat girls compared to other girls) >talk her into starting to go to the gym with me, first phase >then talk her into changing her diet, second phase >in a few months she loses most of the weight >now i have an extremely loyal and loving 10/10 gf who I'm probably going to marry >mfw i beat the game Tbf my stats aren't that bad and l'm definitely not Chad material.
: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)22:19:00 No.66508853 >be me >23 >never had a gf before >decide to put into plan a basic idea I had years ago 48 KB JPG >only go after fat girls >spend a lot of time looking at very good looking women online who used to be fat >can now tell easily whether a fat woman would be very attractive if she lost the weight >fat girls are easier to date, they're most of my tinder matches, they're the ones who react the most positively to cold approaching >find a literal 10/10 a---- goddess but she's tall and fat, looks like s--- but you can tell there's potential under all that fat >ask her out and she says yes, very enthusiastic about it, have very pleasant date >lose my virginity to her, she was also a virgin (something i found to be very common among fat girls compared to other girls) >talk her into starting to go to the gym with me, first phase >then talk her into changing her diet, second phase >in a few months she loses most of the weight >now i have an extremely loyal and loving 10/10 gf who I'm probably going to marry >mfw i beat the game Tbf my stats aren't that bad and l'm definitely not Chad material.

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Here we go, the world is spinning. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/25/20(Wed)12:25:32 No.120221896 >Happy birthday son, here is your present, I hope you like it 206 KB JPG : Anonymous 03/25/20(Wed)12:26:39 No.120221944 >>120221896 (OP) # >WHAT THE F--- GIGACHAD? HAVEN'T YOU SEEN THE MOVIE? 513 KB PNG >>120222043 # : Anonymous 03/25/20(Wed)12:28:53 No.120222043 >>120221944 # >movie? Are you talking about this cool tape I found? 181 KB JPG >>120222100 # >>120222210 # : Anonymous| 03/25/20(Wed)12:30:01 No.120222100 >>120222043 # >woah check it out I think she wants to suck my d--- bro haha 63 KB JPG >>120222210 # >>120222229 #
: Anonymous 03/25/20(Wed)12:25:32 No.120221896 >Happy birthday son, here is your present, I hope you like it 206 KB JPG : Anonymous 03/25/20(Wed)12:26:39 No.120221944 >>120221896 (OP) # >WHAT THE F--- GIGACHAD? HAVEN'T YOU SEEN THE MOVIE? 513 KB PNG >>120222043 # : Anonymous 03/25/20(Wed)12:28:53 No.120222043 >>120221944 # >movie? Are you talking about this cool tape I found? 181 KB JPG >>120222100 # >>120222210 # : Anonymous| 03/25/20(Wed)12:30:01 No.120222100 >>120222043 # >woah check it out I think she wants to suck my d--- bro haha 63 KB JPG >>120222210 # >>120222229 #

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Anon’s cat is the best | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/12/19(Tue)20:46:04 No.792494021 >be me, 17f and in treatmen and recovery from r--- >walking through petco to pick up crickets for my friends pet lizard >lock eyes with this cat in the adoption area >she presses her paw up to the 570 KB JPG glass >cryinginpublic.jpg >l impulsively adopt her >two months later, sucidal thoughts almost nonexistent and able to talk to strangers again >cat is my best friend, she never leaves my side when I'm home and encourages me to get out of bed in the morning Don't forget to give your pet a hug today
: Anonymous 02/12/19(Tue)20:46:04 No.792494021 >be me, 17f and in treatmen and recovery from r--- >walking through petco to pick up crickets for my friends pet lizard >lock eyes with this cat in the adoption area >she presses her paw up to the 570 KB JPG glass >cryinginpublic.jpg >l impulsively adopt her >two months later, sucidal thoughts almost nonexistent and able to talk to strangers again >cat is my best friend, she never leaves my side when I'm home and encourages me to get out of bed in the morning Don't forget to give your pet a hug today

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Anon is a boomer | /r/Greentext

I tell ya' >opens a can of Bud Light kids these days >gently massages protruding beer belly just ain't >begins daily ritual of zoning out to TV like they used to be >puts a triple bacon cheeseburger in the 52 KB PNG microwave Why back in my day >cheers as his favorite n---- catches the football we had some >asks permission to go to the local sports bar, wife says no gosh darn >hires Jose the illegal immigrant to mow his lawn work ethic n' >blames Jose for all his problems pride >dies of a heart attack at age 58
I tell ya' >opens a can of Bud Light kids these days >gently massages protruding beer belly just ain't >begins daily ritual of zoning out to TV like they used to be >puts a triple bacon cheeseburger in the 52 KB PNG microwave Why back in my day >cheers as his favorite n---- catches the football we had some >asks permission to go to the local sports bar, wife says no gosh darn >hires Jose the illegal immigrant to mow his lawn work ethic n' >blames Jose for all his problems pride >dies of a heart attack at age 58

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Anon is an idiot, even for a 4chin. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Never again 12/10/21(Fri)12:36:54 No.66502760 >have stuffing fetish, am underweight male >only look at girls doing it but fantasize about doing it to myself >decide that tonight's the night >plan on eating 12 McDonald's hamburgers and drinking 12 cans of soda 98 KB JPG >think it's going to feel orgasmically tight like in DeviantArt and Pixiv drawings >manage to eat 7 burgers and drink 5 cans of soda before I just feel really unwell in general >try for an 8th and 6th >manage to get them down but decide to call it quits for now, maybe resume in thirty minutes >decide to lie down on my bed >on my way there, I vomit in my trash can >just bad feelings all around Fetishes in real life suck compared to 2D depictions of them. In total I consumed 2900 calories and 2.89 kg before vomiting.
: Anonymous Never again 12/10/21(Fri)12:36:54 No.66502760 >have stuffing fetish, am underweight male >only look at girls doing it but fantasize about doing it to myself >decide that tonight's the night >plan on eating 12 McDonald's hamburgers and drinking 12 cans of soda 98 KB JPG >think it's going to feel orgasmically tight like in DeviantArt and Pixiv drawings >manage to eat 7 burgers and drink 5 cans of soda before I just feel really unwell in general >try for an 8th and 6th >manage to get them down but decide to call it quits for now, maybe resume in thirty minutes >decide to lie down on my bed >on my way there, I vomit in my trash can >just bad feelings all around Fetishes in real life suck compared to 2D depictions of them. In total I consumed 2900 calories and 2.89 kg before vomiting.

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Anon talks to a coworker | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous FIRST TIME 12/10/21(Fri)10:21:49 No.66505696 >be me at work >talk with female coworker about sex life >she tells me she had her first time at 16 with her first boyfriend >I tell her I had my first time at 18 drunk with a prostitute >her eyes get all watery 248 KB JPG >"I am so sorry anon" Why do normies care so much about the first time? If you are a virgin you are a creep. But when you lose your virginity not in some crappy "teenage love" scenario its wrong too.
: Anonymous FIRST TIME 12/10/21(Fri)10:21:49 No.66505696 >be me at work >talk with female coworker about sex life >she tells me she had her first time at 16 with her first boyfriend >I tell her I had my first time at 18 drunk with a prostitute >her eyes get all watery 248 KB JPG >"I am so sorry anon" Why do normies care so much about the first time? If you are a virgin you are a creep. But when you lose your virginity not in some crappy "teenage love" scenario its wrong too.

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Anon is going to riot | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/21/18(Tue)21:10:57 No.77782693 >guys its the funny hee hee color text >haah be sure to upvote my post on reddit please i need the internet points :))) 17 KB PNG if this gets posted on reddit im going to f------ riot
: Anonymous 08/21/18(Tue)21:10:57 No.77782693 >guys its the funny hee hee color text >haah be sure to upvote my post on reddit please i need the internet points :))) 17 KB PNG if this gets posted on reddit im going to f------ riot

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Anon has apple juice | /r/Greentext

Board /b/ - Random Settings Home File: 1397777446003.png (78 KB, 253x235) >working in a high end restaurant >chef is hard ass german >decide to f--- with him >bartender brings up case of apple juice in cans, and leaves it in the kitchen >snag 3 cans from the case, and crank the oven to 500 >service starts >it's time >place cans of apple juice in the oven >they start to melt and contort, leaking apple juice into the inferno of an oven >chef walks into the kitchen >"VAT IS ZAT HISSING" >try to contain my laughter as k---- chef opens the oven door to see melting cans of juice >k---- chef starts yelling "WHY IZ ZE JEWZ IN ZE OVEN, TAKE ZE JEWZ OUT OF ZE OVEN >entire dining room can hear him >k---- chef never found out that it was me
Board /b/ - Random Settings Home File: 1397777446003.png (78 KB, 253x235) >working in a high end restaurant >chef is hard ass german >decide to f--- with him >bartender brings up case of apple juice in cans, and leaves it in the kitchen >snag 3 cans from the case, and crank the oven to 500 >service starts >it's time >place cans of apple juice in the oven >they start to melt and contort, leaking apple juice into the inferno of an oven >chef walks into the kitchen >"VAT IS ZAT HISSING" >try to contain my laughter as k---- chef opens the oven door to see melting cans of juice >k---- chef starts yelling "WHY IZ ZE JEWZ IN ZE OVEN, TAKE ZE JEWZ OUT OF ZE OVEN >entire dining room can hear him >k---- chef never found out that it was me

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Anon destroys T H O T | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/07/18(Sun)19:02:58 No.781735111 >be me >3rd grade >3rd grade stacy comes up to be >starts poking me and teasing me about liking pokemon >youfukinwhat.jpg >stand up Thot Patrol 69 KB JPG >make myself as large as possible >take off my shirt to reveal my massive peks and muscles >puff out my chest >t-pose with my arms >scream at the top of my lungs "BE GONE T HOT" >Wind blasts out from behind me >lazers and s--- blast out >she instantly dies >i turn around >ben f------ shapiro is standing behind me >he god-slaps me into the nth dimension >before i evaporate into t---- noodles he moans softly into be ear "Another libtard destroyed" >die Best nut of my life
: Anonymous 10/07/18(Sun)19:02:58 No.781735111 >be me >3rd grade >3rd grade stacy comes up to be >starts poking me and teasing me about liking pokemon >youfukinwhat.jpg >stand up Thot Patrol 69 KB JPG >make myself as large as possible >take off my shirt to reveal my massive peks and muscles >puff out my chest >t-pose with my arms >scream at the top of my lungs "BE GONE T HOT" >Wind blasts out from behind me >lazers and s--- blast out >she instantly dies >i turn around >ben f------ shapiro is standing behind me >he god-slaps me into the nth dimension >before i evaporate into t---- noodles he moans softly into be ear "Another libtard destroyed" >die Best nut of my life

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Anon joins a cult | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous JW GF 12/09/21(Thu)21:05:59 No.66499446 >saw a post anon made about finding a Jehovah's Witnesses gf >decide to join their zoom call meeting >everything anon said is true >people talk to each other at the beginning 136 KB JPG >don't want to turn on my camera and talk >in the end of the meeting they talk to each other again >grow the balls to say hello >everyone is welcoming >they want to know more about me >tell them I want to learn about Jehovah >qt3.14 girl offers private zoom lectures with her >we video chat and text regularly >we watch movies from JW library together >she is very nice to me now what? how do I girlfriend her?
: Anonymous JW GF 12/09/21(Thu)21:05:59 No.66499446 >saw a post anon made about finding a Jehovah's Witnesses gf >decide to join their zoom call meeting >everything anon said is true >people talk to each other at the beginning 136 KB JPG >don't want to turn on my camera and talk >in the end of the meeting they talk to each other again >grow the balls to say hello >everyone is welcoming >they want to know more about me >tell them I want to learn about Jehovah >qt3.14 girl offers private zoom lectures with her >we video chat and text regularly >we watch movies from JW library together >she is very nice to me now what? how do I girlfriend her?

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anon orders domino's | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/09/21(Thu)19:37:21 No.66500822 [Repl >ordered a pizza >don't very often, it's a treat >smiling while I sit and think about pizza >shows up, happy times- >the pizza isn't cut >garlic bread like cardboard >sauce pack obviously dropped >stare at the uncut pizza for a bit >try cutting it but it's not right, the box is in the way >poke the garlic bread but it's so hard and not even warm >want to smash the pizza, or throw it, or anything else >slump down in my chair and feel nothing >want to cry about it but just feel numb >entire night ruined, maybe my whole week >add them to the list of places l'll never order from again
Anonymous 12/09/21(Thu)19:37:21 No.66500822 [Repl >ordered a pizza >don't very often, it's a treat >smiling while I sit and think about pizza >shows up, happy times- >the pizza isn't cut >garlic bread like cardboard >sauce pack obviously dropped >stare at the uncut pizza for a bit >try cutting it but it's not right, the box is in the way >poke the garlic bread but it's so hard and not even warm >want to smash the pizza, or throw it, or anything else >slump down in my chair and feel nothing >want to cry about it but just feel numb >entire night ruined, maybe my whole week >add them to the list of places l'll never order from again

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Morning glory | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)03:53:42 No.66503581 >go for a morning walk >the birds are singing and the sun is shining >feel in great spirits >walking past old lady >say good morning to her >she smiles and says good morning 66 KB JPG >continue walking >coming up to a woman of my age >say good morning >she stops >looks at me >"i have a boyfriend" >i pause >"what?" >she look at my eyes >"i have a boyfriend now leave me alone" >she walks away >suddenly my mood is ruined >go home >crash into bed
: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)03:53:42 No.66503581 >go for a morning walk >the birds are singing and the sun is shining >feel in great spirits >walking past old lady >say good morning to her >she smiles and says good morning 66 KB JPG >continue walking >coming up to a woman of my age >say good morning >she stops >looks at me >"i have a boyfriend" >i pause >"what?" >she look at my eyes >"i have a boyfriend now leave me alone" >she walks away >suddenly my mood is ruined >go home >crash into bed

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Anon made a Egyptian friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I I 01/31/21(Sun)20:45:31 No.138718405 >Call Amazon customer service >l'm informed the call center guy is speaking from Egypt >Turns out to be the most professional, most polite call center guy l've ever interacted with >Thank him a lot 44 KB PNG >"Always at your service Sir" >Before leavingI ask him if he's actually Egyptian >"Yes" >congratulate him on his perfect Italian >"Thanks, I invite you to visit Egypt, the country of the the Sphinx and the Pyramids, one of the seven wonders of the world" >Haha wow thanks! >"I've worked with Italians before. You can visit my city which is located there near there, you'll love it there" >Thank him so much, and ask him his name again >He knows mine from the screen I felt /international/ love bliss bros. I now have a new Egyptian fren
: Anonymous I I 01/31/21(Sun)20:45:31 No.138718405 >Call Amazon customer service >l'm informed the call center guy is speaking from Egypt >Turns out to be the most professional, most polite call center guy l've ever interacted with >Thank him a lot 44 KB PNG >"Always at your service Sir" >Before leavingI ask him if he's actually Egyptian >"Yes" >congratulate him on his perfect Italian >"Thanks, I invite you to visit Egypt, the country of the the Sphinx and the Pyramids, one of the seven wonders of the world" >Haha wow thanks! >"I've worked with Italians before. You can visit my city which is located there near there, you'll love it there" >Thank him so much, and ask him his name again >He knows mine from the screen I felt /international/ love bliss bros. I now have a new Egyptian fren

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Australianon's thoughts on the land of the free | /r/Greentext


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Anon’s bro is a chad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)11:55:07 No.66504079 >brother is a legit Chad but autistic >only leaves the house to go to the gym >spends his days browsing 4chan and making music >family friends come over and bring their daughters 64 KB JPG >can tell they like my brother >he acts cold and distant and ignores them >everyone tries to set him up with a girl and he just goes "I like being alone" does an awkward laugh and quickly goes back to his room >father is starting to wonder if he might be gay It's like he's completely detached from the world, I don't blame him, our parents used to fight a lot while we were young and that probably f----- him up, but still. If I had 18 year old p---- being thrown at my face l'd take it in a heartbeat.
: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)11:55:07 No.66504079 >brother is a legit Chad but autistic >only leaves the house to go to the gym >spends his days browsing 4chan and making music >family friends come over and bring their daughters 64 KB JPG >can tell they like my brother >he acts cold and distant and ignores them >everyone tries to set him up with a girl and he just goes "I like being alone" does an awkward laugh and quickly goes back to his room >father is starting to wonder if he might be gay It's like he's completely detached from the world, I don't blame him, our parents used to fight a lot while we were young and that probably f----- him up, but still. If I had 18 year old p---- being thrown at my face l'd take it in a heartbeat.

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Anon’s sister turns 16 | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 05/03/14(Sat)13:45:49 No.46503828 4SO20 siyounger sister decided to host a party for her 18th birthday on a Saturday when are parents aren't around >she's a litle "different", so I was worried no one would come >told me she gave out birthday invitations to all her classmates >the day of the swoet 16th >it's 6 in the evening >no one came >kapt my sister company while we ate Doritos in the empty decorated living roam >feel sad for her >decide to do something about it >caled all my friends to come downi to the house >toid them to bring all their other friends and bring a coupie snacks and drinks it's e at night >around 200 in qur house >people spilling out our antrance and back doors feels good man >Girl Talk's All Day booming arqund our house >random people jumping into and swimming in our home pool >friends do a huge Tug O War in the living room Prnd cups and skowers everywhere >irs fike a mini Project X party >it's 1 in the morning >l bririg the cake in for my sister >everyone sings her a happy birthday >aho looks to me and givon me the greatent hug I've ever had >l srnile ahe blows the cake and we continue partying Anonymous 05/03/14(Sat)13:47.29 No.46503859 >>46503828 (OP) >fhis didn't tun into an i----- story good job, OP, keep it legit.
O Anonymous 05/03/14(Sat)13:45:49 No.46503828 4SO20 siyounger sister decided to host a party for her 18th birthday on a Saturday when are parents aren't around >she's a litle "different", so I was worried no one would come >told me she gave out birthday invitations to all her classmates >the day of the swoet 16th >it's 6 in the evening >no one came >kapt my sister company while we ate Doritos in the empty decorated living roam >feel sad for her >decide to do something about it >caled all my friends to come downi to the house >toid them to bring all their other friends and bring a coupie snacks and drinks it's e at night >around 200 in qur house >people spilling out our antrance and back doors feels good man >Girl Talk's All Day booming arqund our house >random people jumping into and swimming in our home pool >friends do a huge Tug O War in the living room Prnd cups and skowers everywhere >irs fike a mini Project X party >it's 1 in the morning >l bririg the cake in for my sister >everyone sings her a happy birthday >aho looks to me and givon me the greatent hug I've ever had >l srnile ahe blows the cake and we continue partying Anonymous 05/03/14(Sat)13:47.29 No.46503859 >>46503828 (OP) >fhis didn't tun into an i----- story good job, OP, keep it legit.

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Anon takes the Jocko pill | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/22/20(Thu)19:06:17 No.16634747 >>16633841 (OP) # Wake up at 1am in the freezer Gargle piss Uncomfortable? Good. Listen to 5 self improvement podcasts at once as you drag a tyre to work 63 KB PNG Fire ants in a diaper to keep you going Ex wife calls Says you can't visit the kids this weekend Good. They only slow you down Get to work, gargle more pee Do work on Chinese keyboard Don't know Chinese? You will. Broken glass for lunch Boss comes in, says you're falling behind He doesn't understand He can't He isn't a wolf in this world of sheep Get hit by 3 cars on the way home while listening to audiobooks at 2x speed New record Legs broken? Good. Pass out on kitchen floor, roaches kissing you all over They understand the grind Set alarm for 1am and drift into a coma while listening to asmr
: Anonymous 10/22/20(Thu)19:06:17 No.16634747 >>16633841 (OP) # Wake up at 1am in the freezer Gargle piss Uncomfortable? Good. Listen to 5 self improvement podcasts at once as you drag a tyre to work 63 KB PNG Fire ants in a diaper to keep you going Ex wife calls Says you can't visit the kids this weekend Good. They only slow you down Get to work, gargle more pee Do work on Chinese keyboard Don't know Chinese? You will. Broken glass for lunch Boss comes in, says you're falling behind He doesn't understand He can't He isn't a wolf in this world of sheep Get hit by 3 cars on the way home while listening to audiobooks at 2x speed New record Legs broken? Good. Pass out on kitchen floor, roaches kissing you all over They understand the grind Set alarm for 1am and drift into a coma while listening to asmr

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Anon encounters a bitch | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)16:13:44 No.868331735 >be me >be interested in a girl >start taking to her on discord >ask her about her interests >think I am making progress >random says that I made her feel uncomfortable 104 KB PNG >say sorry >think that I am a bad person for making her feel bad >next day she says that she's not interested in me >ok np >fast forward a couple months >In class for final day of school >ask the whole group "what's the weirdest thing you have seen on the internet?“ >she says "anon" >calls me a creep in-front of everyone in class >apologize again for what I did >can't believe this is happened >mfw Why are people like this? If she said not to talk to her I would have stopped now everyone will think I am a creep and did some serious s--- to her.
: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)16:13:44 No.868331735 >be me >be interested in a girl >start taking to her on discord >ask her about her interests >think I am making progress >random says that I made her feel uncomfortable 104 KB PNG >say sorry >think that I am a bad person for making her feel bad >next day she says that she's not interested in me >ok np >fast forward a couple months >In class for final day of school >ask the whole group "what's the weirdest thing you have seen on the internet?“ >she says "anon" >calls me a creep in-front of everyone in class >apologize again for what I did >can't believe this is happened >mfw Why are people like this? If she said not to talk to her I would have stopped now everyone will think I am a creep and did some serious s--- to her.

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Anon is genius | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous 01/22/20(Wed)02:16:13 No.819003901 I just got released from prison. Four years. robbed a f------ bank but plead down to aggravated assault. Money's gone. F------ dye packs. Oh well, could have been 20 so no complaints. Now what do? Drive a truck? >>819004027 # >>819004077 # >>819004321 # >>819014798 # : Anonymous 01/22/20(Wed)02:26:13 No.819004321 >>819003901 # Here's what you do >start youtube channel >your very first video is going to be you sitting in front of a high quality camera looking presentable >half the screen is going to show a videogame >title of the youtube video: "REAL Bank Robber Critiques GTA5 Bank Heist Mission" >you're gonna commentate over the gta5 intro and say s--- like "yeah thats pretty realistic they'd have alarms like that" >pause the cutscene every now and then and say some s--- like "back when i hit the bank, the cops were on us much quicker than this, so im not sure this is entirely accurate" >your next videos are going to be you critiquing similar scenes from other games or movies >then your videos are going to be QandA about prison life >before you know it you're at 350k subs and growing and all you do is talk into a camera about prison >enjoy making more money than all of us
| Anonymous 01/22/20(Wed)02:16:13 No.819003901 I just got released from prison. Four years. robbed a f------ bank but plead down to aggravated assault. Money's gone. F------ dye packs. Oh well, could have been 20 so no complaints. Now what do? Drive a truck? >>819004027 # >>819004077 # >>819004321 # >>819014798 # : Anonymous 01/22/20(Wed)02:26:13 No.819004321 >>819003901 # Here's what you do >start youtube channel >your very first video is going to be you sitting in front of a high quality camera looking presentable >half the screen is going to show a videogame >title of the youtube video: "REAL Bank Robber Critiques GTA5 Bank Heist Mission" >you're gonna commentate over the gta5 intro and say s--- like "yeah thats pretty realistic they'd have alarms like that" >pause the cutscene every now and then and say some s--- like "back when i hit the bank, the cops were on us much quicker than this, so im not sure this is entirely accurate" >your next videos are going to be you critiquing similar scenes from other games or movies >then your videos are going to be QandA about prison life >before you know it you're at 350k subs and growing and all you do is talk into a camera about prison >enjoy making more money than all of us

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