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anon can’t win | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)20:06:16 No.867527748 Your Friend Doesn't Want the Vaccine. What Do You Say? >> Get the first two vaccines >> Refuse to get the third booster >> Post about this online >> Friends immediately ask me if i am antivaxx >> Family uninvited me from Thanksgiving 62 KB JPG dinner >> I have 3 weeks untill Im uninvited from Christmas >> Now I am hated by both sides >> Now I am alone on the holidays
: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)20:06:16 No.867527748 Your Friend Doesn't Want the Vaccine. What Do You Say? >> Get the first two vaccines >> Refuse to get the third booster >> Post about this online >> Friends immediately ask me if i am antivaxx >> Family uninvited me from Thanksgiving 62 KB JPG dinner >> I have 3 weeks untill Im uninvited from Christmas >> Now I am hated by both sides >> Now I am alone on the holidays

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Anon is panicking | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:04:00 No.867508674 Have you ever seen that king of the 55 hill episode where bobby kicks SPEED LIMIT hank in the balls and one of Hanks testicles just kinda disappears into his body for a bit? Thats kind of what is happening to 511 KB PNG me. I would be lying if I didn't confess that I am s------- my self becuase ever since last night, my left nut is has disappeard. My right one is dangling away but my left one is gone. What do I do? : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:07:29 No.867508862 >>867508674 (OP) # it's my nut now.. KB PNG >>867508956 # : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:09:25 No.867508953 : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:09:29 No.867508956 >>867508862 # why did ie even come here for medical advice im going to the doctor. I think the money is worth it
: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:04:00 No.867508674 Have you ever seen that king of the 55 hill episode where bobby kicks SPEED LIMIT hank in the balls and one of Hanks testicles just kinda disappears into his body for a bit? Thats kind of what is happening to 511 KB PNG me. I would be lying if I didn't confess that I am s------- my self becuase ever since last night, my left nut is has disappeard. My right one is dangling away but my left one is gone. What do I do? : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:07:29 No.867508862 >>867508674 (OP) # it's my nut now.. KB PNG >>867508956 # : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:09:25 No.867508953 : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:09:29 No.867508956 >>867508862 # why did ie even come here for medical advice im going to the doctor. I think the money is worth it

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Anon is a tomboy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)15:12:38 No.25372089 >be me >Straight femanon >Been tomboyish since I was young >Short hair, masculine clothing, etc. >had primarily male friends in elementary, they accepted me as one of them. >Get to middle school >Swept into female friend group >Very liberal and progressive bunch >They start making jokes about how I must be gay or even trans because of my masculine personality and appearance >l just laugh it off, but it only gets worse >guysimstraight.jpg >In high school now >Still happening What to do anons?
Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)15:12:38 No.25372089 >be me >Straight femanon >Been tomboyish since I was young >Short hair, masculine clothing, etc. >had primarily male friends in elementary, they accepted me as one of them. >Get to middle school >Swept into female friend group >Very liberal and progressive bunch >They start making jokes about how I must be gay or even trans because of my masculine personality and appearance >l just laugh it off, but it only gets worse >guysimstraight.jpg >In high school now >Still happening What to do anons?

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Anon is an addict | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/26/21(Fri)17:11:41 No.66305958 >Dealer won't answer Tehehe I'm gonna f------ SCREAM WHY ARE THEY ALL LIKE THIS 382 KB JPG
: Anonymous 11/26/21(Fri)17:11:41 No.66305958 >Dealer won't answer Tehehe I'm gonna f------ SCREAM WHY ARE THEY ALL LIKE THIS 382 KB JPG

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Anon has to poop | /r/Greentext

>be me, 18 >going out to the woods to meet the gang for drinking and shenanigans >about halfway there and feel a rumbling in my tummy >tell bro l'm waling with I don't feel 131 KB PNG well and am going to go home >about halfway home at local skate park can't hold it any longer >no one is around >drop pants and drop enormous deuce in the grass next to the skate park >two girl walk by and make no secret of looking at me >wipe ass with handful of grass, rush home to change, got s--- all over the back of my pants >ff to the next morning, I go out to see what the boys are up to >boys are hanging out at skate park >they show me s--- pile that looks more horse than human >ask if I know anything >deny knowing anything >it gets blamed on local inbred crackhead >mfw
>be me, 18 >going out to the woods to meet the gang for drinking and shenanigans >about halfway there and feel a rumbling in my tummy >tell bro l'm waling with I don't feel 131 KB PNG well and am going to go home >about halfway home at local skate park can't hold it any longer >no one is around >drop pants and drop enormous deuce in the grass next to the skate park >two girl walk by and make no secret of looking at me >wipe ass with handful of grass, rush home to change, got s--- all over the back of my pants >ff to the next morning, I go out to see what the boys are up to >boys are hanging out at skate park >they show me s--- pile that looks more horse than human >ask if I know anything >deny knowing anything >it gets blamed on local inbred crackhead >mfw

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Exterminate. | /r/Greentext

File: monkahmm-emote.jpg (26 KB, 300x300) O Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)20:58:37 No.867511330 >be me, 32, regular wageslave >have functional family, two children and a dog >finally save up enough money to have a nice vacation with my family, but need someone to take care of my dog >friend readily agrees to take care of the dog for two weeks >l am glad that this is sorted out, and enjoy some quality time with my family >ffw two weeks >lm >Im back, and pick up my dog > Ask friend how it went >"Oh he is a nice boi, would always take him again." >back >sniffing >tries to hump my wife and my children whenever he sees a chance >red rocket multiple times a day home, dog shows unusual behavior our butts constantly at What the f--- did my friend do with my dog?
File: monkahmm-emote.jpg (26 KB, 300x300) O Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)20:58:37 No.867511330 >be me, 32, regular wageslave >have functional family, two children and a dog >finally save up enough money to have a nice vacation with my family, but need someone to take care of my dog >friend readily agrees to take care of the dog for two weeks >l am glad that this is sorted out, and enjoy some quality time with my family >ffw two weeks >lm >Im back, and pick up my dog > Ask friend how it went >"Oh he is a nice boi, would always take him again." >back >sniffing >tries to hump my wife and my children whenever he sees a chance >red rocket multiple times a day home, dog shows unusual behavior our butts constantly at What the f--- did my friend do with my dog?

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Anon gets good advice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)06:13:58 No.867492112 >>867492062 # >Easiest way to kill myself? Shoot yourself in the head twice. Make it look like an assassination.
: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)06:13:58 No.867492112 >>867492062 # >Easiest way to kill myself? Shoot yourself in the head twice. Make it look like an assassination.

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Anon needs a mirror. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: BTGWWVBQ ) E I MOVED OUT OF A DEMOCRAT S---(...) 11/27/21(Sat)11:41:22 No.349714230 I haven't seen a n----- since. In fact, I have forgotten what they look like 864 KB PNG : Anonymous (ID: oveAbGNI 11/27/21(Sat)11:42:36 No.349714368 >>349714230 (OP) # They don't have mirrors where you moved to?
: Anonymous (ID: BTGWWVBQ ) E I MOVED OUT OF A DEMOCRAT S---(...) 11/27/21(Sat)11:41:22 No.349714230 I haven't seen a n----- since. In fact, I have forgotten what they look like 864 KB PNG : Anonymous (ID: oveAbGNI 11/27/21(Sat)11:42:36 No.349714368 >>349714230 (OP) # They don't have mirrors where you moved to?

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Anon shares autistic tendencies | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)20:57:30 No.66324806 ITT: Autistic things you do without realising >Make the POG face whenever I get a rare drop in a game >Realise a girl from uni was flirting with me 3 years later 11 KB JPG
: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)20:57:30 No.66324806 ITT: Autistic things you do without realising >Make the POG face whenever I get a rare drop in a game >Realise a girl from uni was flirting with me 3 years later 11 KB JPG

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Anon wants some milf | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/02/18(Sun)10:37:49 No.49617641 >tfw you think of all the dumb s--- you did in the past that was really embarrassing 494 KB GIF : Anonymous 12/02/18(Sun)11:24:53 No.49618169 >>49617641 (OP) # >friends mom asks me if i want some milk at dinner >9 yr old me thinks the word milf is funny >"don't you mean if i want some milf" >friend's father is horrified mother's jaw drops >i'm giggling like an a------
: Anonymous 12/02/18(Sun)10:37:49 No.49617641 >tfw you think of all the dumb s--- you did in the past that was really embarrassing 494 KB GIF : Anonymous 12/02/18(Sun)11:24:53 No.49618169 >>49617641 (OP) # >friends mom asks me if i want some milk at dinner >9 yr old me thinks the word milf is funny >"don't you mean if i want some milf" >friend's father is horrified mother's jaw drops >i'm giggling like an a------

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Anon discovers that Reddit is full of degenerates like him | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:46:21 No.867513706 Why do Plebbitors flock to NSFW posts about banging and ignore genuine thoughtful discussion posts? 115 KB PNG 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 11/27/21 (Sat)13:47:33 No.867513767 >>867513706 (OP) # Because p--- is the only reason anyone comes to this board. : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:48:48 No.867513841 >>867513706 (OP) # >genuine thoughtful discussion posts Let me know when you find one.
: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:46:21 No.867513706 Why do Plebbitors flock to NSFW posts about banging and ignore genuine thoughtful discussion posts? 115 KB PNG 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 11/27/21 (Sat)13:47:33 No.867513767 >>867513706 (OP) # Because p--- is the only reason anyone comes to this board. : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:48:48 No.867513841 >>867513706 (OP) # >genuine thoughtful discussion posts Let me know when you find one.

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Be me! Be me! Be me! Be me! | /r/Greentext


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Beta feel sad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: JXU99ZPF 11/27/21(Sat)08:21:47 No.13919279 >l'm such an ugly beta manlet, women instantly feel harassed by my presence even if I keep distance and avoid eye contact 830 KB PNG
: Anonymous (ID: JXU99ZPF 11/27/21(Sat)08:21:47 No.13919279 >l'm such an ugly beta manlet, women instantly feel harassed by my presence even if I keep distance and avoid eye contact 830 KB PNG

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Wrinkles in time | /r/Greentext


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Anon's 16 years of married life | /r/Greentext


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anon cuddles with his cat | /r/Greentext

File: EWA87DBXSAU81C×.jpg (70 KB, 1200x482) O Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:32:54 No.867492564 ► >be me >sad >cat starts rubbing his head on me >cuddles with cat >no longer sad >thanks cat
File: EWA87DBXSAU81C×.jpg (70 KB, 1200x482) O Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)13:32:54 No.867492564 ► >be me >sad >cat starts rubbing his head on me >cuddles with cat >no longer sad >thanks cat

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anon gets hit on | /r/Greentext


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Night stalker | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)08:48:17 No.66321030 >Walking home at night when i come across a woman walking ahead of me >She starts walking faster but i match her pace and move up to her 29 KB JPG >She clearly gets uncomfortable but can't say anything for fear of what i might do Does anyone else do this? It's really fun. Foids should have a male guardian if they don't want this to happen. : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)08:50:46 No.66321051 You should just run faster and pass them to assert the fact that as a men we are physically and mentally superior
: Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)08:48:17 No.66321030 >Walking home at night when i come across a woman walking ahead of me >She starts walking faster but i match her pace and move up to her 29 KB JPG >She clearly gets uncomfortable but can't say anything for fear of what i might do Does anyone else do this? It's really fun. Foids should have a male guardian if they don't want this to happen. : Anonymous 11/27/21(Sat)08:50:46 No.66321051 You should just run faster and pass them to assert the fact that as a men we are physically and mentally superior

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anon is british | /r/Greentext

File : 1321205442.jpg-(76 KB, 399x300, 1321143811349.jpg) Anonymous 11/13/11(Sun)12:30:42 No.363205897 >my face when Americans call chips "french fries" >my face when Americans call crisps "chips" >my face when Americans call chocolate globbernaughts "candy bars" >my face when Americans call motorized rollinghams "cars" >my face when Americans call merry fizzlebombs "fireworks" >my face when Americans call wunderbahboxes a "PC" >my face when Americans call meat water "gravy" >my face when Americans call electro-rope "power cables" >my face when Americans call beef wellington ensemble with lettuce a "hamburger" >my face when Americans call whimsy flimsy mark and scribblers "pens" >my face when Americans call twisting plankhandles "doorknobs" >my face when Americans call a breaddystack a "sandwich" >my face when Americans call their hoighty toighty tippy typers "keyboards" >my face when Americans call nutty-gum and fruit spleggings "peanut butter and jelly" >my face when Americans call an upsy stairsy the "escalator" >my face when Americans call forcey fun time "r---" >my face when Americans call a knittedy wittedy sheepity sleepity a "sweater" >my face when Americans call rickedy-pop a "gear shift" >my face when Americans call a choco chip bicky wicky a "cookie" >my face when Americans call peepee friction pleasure "sex" >my face when Americans call a pip pip gollywock a "screwdriver" >my face when Americans call a rooty tooty point-n-shooty a "gun" >my face when Americans call a ceiling-bright a "lightbulb" >my face when Americans call a blimpy bounce bounce a "ball" >my face when Americans call a slippery dippery long mover a "snake" >my face when Americans call cobble-stone-clippity-clops "roads"
File : 1321205442.jpg-(76 KB, 399x300, 1321143811349.jpg) Anonymous 11/13/11(Sun)12:30:42 No.363205897 >my face when Americans call chips "french fries" >my face when Americans call crisps "chips" >my face when Americans call chocolate globbernaughts "candy bars" >my face when Americans call motorized rollinghams "cars" >my face when Americans call merry fizzlebombs "fireworks" >my face when Americans call wunderbahboxes a "PC" >my face when Americans call meat water "gravy" >my face when Americans call electro-rope "power cables" >my face when Americans call beef wellington ensemble with lettuce a "hamburger" >my face when Americans call whimsy flimsy mark and scribblers "pens" >my face when Americans call twisting plankhandles "doorknobs" >my face when Americans call a breaddystack a "sandwich" >my face when Americans call their hoighty toighty tippy typers "keyboards" >my face when Americans call nutty-gum and fruit spleggings "peanut butter and jelly" >my face when Americans call an upsy stairsy the "escalator" >my face when Americans call forcey fun time "r---" >my face when Americans call a knittedy wittedy sheepity sleepity a "sweater" >my face when Americans call rickedy-pop a "gear shift" >my face when Americans call a choco chip bicky wicky a "cookie" >my face when Americans call peepee friction pleasure "sex" >my face when Americans call a pip pip gollywock a "screwdriver" >my face when Americans call a rooty tooty point-n-shooty a "gun" >my face when Americans call a ceiling-bright a "lightbulb" >my face when Americans call a blimpy bounce bounce a "ball" >my face when Americans call a slippery dippery long mover a "snake" >my face when Americans call cobble-stone-clippity-clops "roads"

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Anon gives no fucks | /r/Greentext

le: download.jpg (56 KB, 1068x601) O Anonymous 11/26/21(Fri)17:08:47 No.867456534 >Be sure to like and subscribe for more great content! Have Youtube Adblock and SponsorBlock installed Watch video Do NOT like Do NOT subscribe go about my day
le: download.jpg (56 KB, 1068x601) O Anonymous 11/26/21(Fri)17:08:47 No.867456534 >Be sure to like and subscribe for more great content! Have Youtube Adblock and SponsorBlock installed Watch video Do NOT like Do NOT subscribe go about my day

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