Greentext Stories - Images

Sorted By:

Anon & Mr. Pringles | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)12:32:28 No.64641307 >be me >Hanging with friends >We go out to get snacks >Grab some candy, a drink, and some Pringles >We get back to his place >Start eating chips 83 KB JPG >Suddenly horny >Look at Pringles can >Intentionally leave chips in can so I bring it home with me >Get home >Still horny >Gather all that is needed and begin building makeshift fleshlight >Ponder my life choices halfway through but I've gone too far to turn back >Look at Mr. Pringles >He looks at me >Obviously f--- the can >Coom >Clean up a stash can away There's no point to this except I just made your dumbass read about me f------ a can of Pringles.
: Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)12:32:28 No.64641307 >be me >Hanging with friends >We go out to get snacks >Grab some candy, a drink, and some Pringles >We get back to his place >Start eating chips 83 KB JPG >Suddenly horny >Look at Pringles can >Intentionally leave chips in can so I bring it home with me >Get home >Still horny >Gather all that is needed and begin building makeshift fleshlight >Ponder my life choices halfway through but I've gone too far to turn back >Look at Mr. Pringles >He looks at me >Obviously f--- the can >Coom >Clean up a stash can away There's no point to this except I just made your dumbass read about me f------ a can of Pringles.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon hates the British | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/10/21(Sat)10:46:45 No.858729928 >be me >making fun of british people is funny >working register at fast food place >british couple walks in, I take their order >strong British accent >trying really hard not to laugh 34 KB JPG >one of them says "water" >burst out laughing, both at the accent and my own autism >can't stop >coworker has to finish taking their order >manager p----- at me >still laughing F--- British people
: Anonymous 07/10/21(Sat)10:46:45 No.858729928 >be me >making fun of british people is funny >working register at fast food place >british couple walks in, I take their order >strong British accent >trying really hard not to laugh 34 KB JPG >one of them says "water" >burst out laughing, both at the accent and my own autism >can't stop >coworker has to finish taking their order >manager p----- at me >still laughing F--- British people

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext happy

The hidden fridge secret | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/24/18(Sun)06:37:57 No.46325141 >Be me >mom locks the fridge >looking for keys >open high cabinet >see a burnt meth pipe >oh f--- 22 КВ ЈPG >take a few hits >confront my mom >getmyassbeat.jpg
: Anonymous 06/24/18(Sun)06:37:57 No.46325141 >Be me >mom locks the fridge >looking for keys >open high cabinet >see a burnt meth pipe >oh f--- 22 КВ ЈPG >take a few hits >confront my mom >getmyassbeat.jpg

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext wood font

anon awakend once again | /r/Greentext

File: 148ie3d59mq01.jpg (123 KB, 1756x1080) Anonymous 07/20/21 (Tue)01:40:49 No.564396095 >>564396239 >be me >see zeldas ass in the ending cutscene >immediately start searching "zelda p---" >jerk one off to zelda and the water girl w-- is wrong with me? Anonymous 07/20/21 (Tue)01:41:52 No.564396208 congratulations, you're a typical human male with a healthy libido you sick FREAK
File: 148ie3d59mq01.jpg (123 KB, 1756x1080) Anonymous 07/20/21 (Tue)01:40:49 No.564396095 >>564396239 >be me >see zeldas ass in the ending cutscene >immediately start searching "zelda p---" >jerk one off to zelda and the water girl w-- is wrong with me? Anonymous 07/20/21 (Tue)01:41:52 No.564396208 congratulations, you're a typical human male with a healthy libido you sick FREAK

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext plant terrestrial plant font

Checkmate Veronica. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)20:01:19 No.64642652 eaf106cc072109caf3459de023d3616e.jpg 202 KB JPG >Anon, quick! Grab the antidote! If my breasts grow past a certain point, they won't be able to return to normal! How do you respond? 7 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)20:15:06 No.64642764 >>64642652 (OP) # Inject the shrinking antidote into my penis. Checkmate Veronica. 80 KB JPG
: Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)20:01:19 No.64642652 eaf106cc072109caf3459de023d3616e.jpg 202 KB JPG >Anon, quick! Grab the antidote! If my breasts grow past a certain point, they won't be able to return to normal! How do you respond? 7 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)20:15:06 No.64642764 >>64642652 (OP) # Inject the shrinking antidote into my penis. Checkmate Veronica. 80 KB JPG

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext arm organ eyelash

Anon had an exam. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)08:14:10 No.64642343 >have online exams this morning >been studying for it for multiple months >its two exams just packed into one word file >barely finish all the tasks just before i have no time left anymore >try to upload it 108 KB JPG >error message >try to upload it again but time is over >tell my professor >he tells me that its my responsibility to send it in time and that he can do nothing for me >realisation kicks in that ive been working day and night for absolutely nothing >the soonest date when i can try again will be in summer 2022 >checked my answers afterwards >everything was correct, wouldve probably been an A >go numb >lay down on bed
Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)08:14:10 No.64642343 >have online exams this morning >been studying for it for multiple months >its two exams just packed into one word file >barely finish all the tasks just before i have no time left anymore >try to upload it 108 KB JPG >error message >try to upload it again but time is over >tell my professor >he tells me that its my responsibility to send it in time and that he can do nothing for me >realisation kicks in that ive been working day and night for absolutely nothing >the soonest date when i can try again will be in summer 2022 >checked my answers afterwards >everything was correct, wouldve probably been an A >go numb >lay down on bed

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon makes a vaccine | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous (ID: 3HOTESC 1 07/20/21(Tue)16:14:34 No.330762341 ► >Be me >In college studying pharma >Decide to focus on r&d for final year >Get really f----- good at science s--- >Finish college with a masters at 25 >Get head hunted by pfizer >Work involves researching for new drugs >Start to work on MRNA s--- >Working on it for 2 years >This s--- has so much room for activity >Covid happens >Boss gives me unlimited money to make a vaccine >Literally the entire world wants this vaccine >Oh s--- my time to shine >World is shut down >Pubs are closed >work even harder >Team works around the clocked for 8 months to get something for testing >Finally get the trials ready >50% effective first try >Great idea comes to mind >Lets give them two doses >Boss loves the idea of selling double vaccines >90% effective.jgp >Start pumping out vaccines for people >People call our vaccine the rolls royce >feels good >Everyone gets the vaccine >Pubs open >Talk to a man outside >Ask him if he got his vaccine >He looks at me cold >Smoking a c-------- >Drinking a pint >Sitting outside in 35 degree weather >"I'm not putting that poison into my body" >MFW I should have let these c---- die.
O Anonymous (ID: 3HOTESC 1 07/20/21(Tue)16:14:34 No.330762341 ► >Be me >In college studying pharma >Decide to focus on r&d for final year >Get really f----- good at science s--- >Finish college with a masters at 25 >Get head hunted by pfizer >Work involves researching for new drugs >Start to work on MRNA s--- >Working on it for 2 years >This s--- has so much room for activity >Covid happens >Boss gives me unlimited money to make a vaccine >Literally the entire world wants this vaccine >Oh s--- my time to shine >World is shut down >Pubs are closed >work even harder >Team works around the clocked for 8 months to get something for testing >Finally get the trials ready >50% effective first try >Great idea comes to mind >Lets give them two doses >Boss loves the idea of selling double vaccines >90% effective.jgp >Start pumping out vaccines for people >People call our vaccine the rolls royce >feels good >Everyone gets the vaccine >Pubs open >Talk to a man outside >Ask him if he got his vaccine >He looks at me cold >Smoking a c-------- >Drinking a pint >Sitting outside in 35 degree weather >"I'm not putting that poison into my body" >MFW I should have let these c---- die.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext eye human body jaw sleeve organism gesture slope happy font

Anon Gives Reddit a Try | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/16/21(Fri)18:07:31 No.64598244 >Make Redditor account >Gain overherlming sense of wanting to say m'lady, and spend $200 for a virtual award to give to some stranger >Dismiss this >Find a post on r/atheism about someone bullying a kid to suicide for being christian 184 KB JPG >"Thats not cool man" >Swarm of Emilys and Neckbeards flock to my comment >"Looking at your post and comment history, you seem bad" >"You're a new account stfu" >"Your mom's maiden name is Lauren? Cringe" >"Your god didnt give me $400B and a house on the beach of sicily." >"I hope all Christians die in a genocide just like what they did to the jews." I know this will end up on r/greentext so tell me redditors, why do you all do extensive backround searches before you reply? And why do you all act so entitled?
: Anonymous 07/16/21(Fri)18:07:31 No.64598244 >Make Redditor account >Gain overherlming sense of wanting to say m'lady, and spend $200 for a virtual award to give to some stranger >Dismiss this >Find a post on r/atheism about someone bullying a kid to suicide for being christian 184 KB JPG >"Thats not cool man" >Swarm of Emilys and Neckbeards flock to my comment >"Looking at your post and comment history, you seem bad" >"You're a new account stfu" >"Your mom's maiden name is Lauren? Cringe" >"Your god didnt give me $400B and a house on the beach of sicily." >"I hope all Christians die in a genocide just like what they did to the jews." I know this will end up on r/greentext so tell me redditors, why do you all do extensive backround searches before you reply? And why do you all act so entitled?

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism terrestrial plant font

Anon is openly gay | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/25/18(Sun)01:18:21 No.49471737 >moaned while the nice haircut lady washed my hair 8 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 11/25/18(Sun)01:18:21 No.49471737 >moaned while the nice haircut lady washed my hair 8 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism font

Anon takes oxycontin | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)10:15:31 No.64049105 >just had knee surgery >given prescription oxycotin >eating dog cookies and talking about crushing my nephews head like omni-man 552 KB JPG These are so f------ good I understand how people get addicted to this stuff.
: Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)10:15:31 No.64049105 >just had knee surgery >given prescription oxycotin >eating dog cookies and talking about crushing my nephews head like omni-man 552 KB JPG These are so f------ good I understand how people get addicted to this stuff.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism rectangle fruit font

Anon's name is actually Melvin | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/08/18(Sat)18:51:07 No.48008179 ► >48008256 File: 1513321471216.png (274 KB, 629x505) >one chance at life >parents named you melvin
Anonymous 09/08/18(Sat)18:51:07 No.48008179 ► >48008256 File: 1513321471216.png (274 KB, 629x505) >one chance at life >parents named you melvin

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Do you even lift? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)11:26:46 No.64643822 >get in >door closes >?????????????? >on a new floor you retards really believe this s---? 141 KB JPG : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)11:28:36 No.64643838 >>64643822 (OP) # >NO0000000 EVELATORS AREN'T PORTALS TO OTHER DIMENSIONS BECAUSE... THEY JUST AREN'T OKKK?!!!??? : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)11:29:32 No.64643846 >>64643822 (OP) # >not exclusively riding glass elevators : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)11:31:37 No.64643873 >>64643822 (OP) # >get in >door closes >???????????????? >in a new country 232 KB JPG how?
: Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)11:26:46 No.64643822 >get in >door closes >?????????????? >on a new floor you retards really believe this s---? 141 KB JPG : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)11:28:36 No.64643838 >>64643822 (OP) # >NO0000000 EVELATORS AREN'T PORTALS TO OTHER DIMENSIONS BECAUSE... THEY JUST AREN'T OKKK?!!!??? : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)11:29:32 No.64643846 >>64643822 (OP) # >not exclusively riding glass elevators : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)11:31:37 No.64643873 >>64643822 (OP) # >get in >door closes >???????????????? >in a new country 232 KB JPG how?

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext product font camera camera lens material property

Anon uses a computer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Code Monkeying 06/08/21(Tue)15:43:27 No.13251713 >Be me and decide to generate cool mandelbrot fractals >Absolutely no coding experience >Find a comfy 50 line github repo in python 91 KB PNG >"Wow! it works yaaayy science" >Increase some random parameters by an order of 10 >Laptop starts sounding like a F-16 jet engine and hasn't finished rendering after 30 minutes When will it halt bros l'm scared? : Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)15:48:58 No.13251718 Stop the script tard >>13253213 # : Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)15:57:57 No.13251745 >>13251713 (OP) # STOP THE SCRIPT RIGHT NOW YOU'RE GOING TO KILL US ALL >>13252046 # >>13253213 #
: Anonymous Code Monkeying 06/08/21(Tue)15:43:27 No.13251713 >Be me and decide to generate cool mandelbrot fractals >Absolutely no coding experience >Find a comfy 50 line github repo in python 91 KB PNG >"Wow! it works yaaayy science" >Increase some random parameters by an order of 10 >Laptop starts sounding like a F-16 jet engine and hasn't finished rendering after 30 minutes When will it halt bros l'm scared? : Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)15:48:58 No.13251718 Stop the script tard >>13253213 # : Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)15:57:57 No.13251745 >>13251713 (OP) # STOP THE SCRIPT RIGHT NOW YOU'RE GOING TO KILL US ALL >>13252046 # >>13253213 #

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon visits Amsterdam | /r/Greentext

: Ahonymous What destination did /trv/ mem(...) 07/07/21(Wed)14:45:01 No.2052548 Hear that Amsterdam is based from numerous people. >oh wow look at the beautiful canals >le weed is legal, dude >le Red Light District >omg everything is so cozy >everybody rides a bike because they 456 KB JPG are progressed >people are super nice and chill >they really do have everything figured out I tell ya! Finally decide to check it out, really excited, was there for like 5 days. >beautiful canals get stale in like a second >pretentious scenery >weed literally s----tier, not even legal, everything is overpriced cos of muh coffee shops >people are pretentious MASSIVE AUTISMO c---- all being high and mighty about how they have it figured out "huh do you know, that like in Amsterdam, we really have a great way of living" but every f------ apartment is 3x3 m2 for 1500EUR a month >"yes we do bike everywhere as its more efficient" literally jammed with bikers everywhere, no rules whatsoever, almost died at one bridge cos the "genius" urbanisation truly shined and the infrastructure is "top- notch" >literally the worst tourists on the planet gather here F--- this s------- and f--- you for recommending it to me
: Ahonymous What destination did /trv/ mem(...) 07/07/21(Wed)14:45:01 No.2052548 Hear that Amsterdam is based from numerous people. >oh wow look at the beautiful canals >le weed is legal, dude >le Red Light District >omg everything is so cozy >everybody rides a bike because they 456 KB JPG are progressed >people are super nice and chill >they really do have everything figured out I tell ya! Finally decide to check it out, really excited, was there for like 5 days. >beautiful canals get stale in like a second >pretentious scenery >weed literally s----tier, not even legal, everything is overpriced cos of muh coffee shops >people are pretentious MASSIVE AUTISMO c---- all being high and mighty about how they have it figured out "huh do you know, that like in Amsterdam, we really have a great way of living" but every f------ apartment is 3x3 m2 for 1500EUR a month >"yes we do bike everywhere as its more efficient" literally jammed with bikers everywhere, no rules whatsoever, almost died at one bridge cos the "genius" urbanisation truly shined and the infrastructure is "top- notch" >literally the worst tourists on the planet gather here F--- this s------- and f--- you for recommending it to me

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Gods not smiling upon us robots | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous why would god make me like thi(...) 07/20/21(Tue)11:52:47 No.64641088 >working at cafe >female coworkers are talking loudly in the back >overhear "oh my god (other coworker) is so awkward!!! hahah let me do an impression haha" >proceeds to imitate how i take an order, 10 KB JPG down to the exact words >both start laughing uncontrollably if there is a god, i f------ hate him 12 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)12:04:57 No.64641164 >>64641088 (OP) # "Two servings of c--- coming right up" 56 KB JPG
: Anonymous why would god make me like thi(...) 07/20/21(Tue)11:52:47 No.64641088 >working at cafe >female coworkers are talking loudly in the back >overhear "oh my god (other coworker) is so awkward!!! hahah let me do an impression haha" >proceeds to imitate how i take an order, 10 KB JPG down to the exact words >both start laughing uncontrollably if there is a god, i f------ hate him 12 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 07/20/21(Tue)12:04:57 No.64641164 >>64641088 (OP) # "Two servings of c--- coming right up" 56 KB JPG

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon is monke | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 24588121 2 hr. ago •• >make gf take a brisk walk in the woods during 35c day. >ambush her by a grassy knoll >lift up her short skirt and take a deep long whiff of her smelly sweaty c--- >have an asthma attack due to hay allergy >gf calls ambulance and tells them i passed out sniffing her p---- >other hikers heard 221.4 kB PNG Should i just kill myself? 3 REPLIES O IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 24588186 2 hr. ago >>24588121 (OP) Mate you're a f------ ape. 10/10 primal return to monke.
Anonymous | 24588121 2 hr. ago •• >make gf take a brisk walk in the woods during 35c day. >ambush her by a grassy knoll >lift up her short skirt and take a deep long whiff of her smelly sweaty c--- >have an asthma attack due to hay allergy >gf calls ambulance and tells them i passed out sniffing her p---- >other hikers heard 221.4 kB PNG Should i just kill myself? 3 REPLIES O IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 24588186 2 hr. ago >>24588121 (OP) Mate you're a f------ ape. 10/10 primal return to monke.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

anon wants to be a wizard | /r/Greentext

onymous 10/02/19(Wed)09:16:23 No.54692176 >be very young anon >"Anon, what do you want to be when you grow up?" >"I want to be a wizard!" >"You mean like a stage magician or..." >"NO! I WANT TO BE A REAL WIZARD WITH REAL MAGIC!" 70 KB PNG >"Anon, magic isn't real. You have to pick something real." >later >"Hey anon, what do you want to be when you grow up?" (other person) >"W... Nothing." >"Really?" >"Yes. I don't want to be anything when I grow up." >fast forward to present day >l have amounted to nothing over the course of my life >pretty much just a friendless loser living in basement >still want to be a wizard
onymous 10/02/19(Wed)09:16:23 No.54692176 >be very young anon >"Anon, what do you want to be when you grow up?" >"I want to be a wizard!" >"You mean like a stage magician or..." >"NO! I WANT TO BE A REAL WIZARD WITH REAL MAGIC!" 70 KB PNG >"Anon, magic isn't real. You have to pick something real." >later >"Hey anon, what do you want to be when you grow up?" (other person) >"W... Nothing." >"Really?" >"Yes. I don't want to be anything when I grow up." >fast forward to present day >l have amounted to nothing over the course of my life >pretty much just a friendless loser living in basement >still want to be a wizard

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon's Gf blocks the vacation | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/17/21(Sat)20:58:32 No.2059123 >be alone >pick a place where I want to go >go >get a gf >anooon where will we go >say option A >nooo I dont want to go there 10 KB JPG >say B >nooo I dont want to go there >say C >nooo I dont want to go there >say D >nooo Literal suffering. Never get a gf.
: Anonymous 07/17/21(Sat)20:58:32 No.2059123 >be alone >pick a place where I want to go >go >get a gf >anooon where will we go >say option A >nooo I dont want to go there 10 KB JPG >say B >nooo I dont want to go there >say C >nooo I dont want to go there >say D >nooo Literal suffering. Never get a gf.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant

/b/tard likes George Floyd | /r/Greentext

1h (7/19 23:49) · 859309777 75 Re · 43 Img · JPG· 26KB · (640 × 360) 22 Replies /b/ you've absolutely ruined me. You've all memed George Floyd so hard that his face makes me laugh by association at this point. F--- you f--- you f--- you f--- you f--- you >be me 15 minutes ago >in uni lecture hall >law prof doing boring power point >gets to a part about the importance of documenting abuse of power >next slide >GeorgeFloyd_highres.jpeg >I let out one of those awkward nose snorkly sounds as I try not to laugh >prof hasn't even begun to read the slide >room was silent >people heard >the dude who sits two rows in front of me turns around and just stares at me with a look of confusion and disgust on his face >I try to play it off as having the sniffles F--- you /b/ this is all your fault for giving me a Pavlovian response to that picture
1h (7/19 23:49) · 859309777 75 Re · 43 Img · JPG· 26KB · (640 × 360) 22 Replies /b/ you've absolutely ruined me. You've all memed George Floyd so hard that his face makes me laugh by association at this point. F--- you f--- you f--- you f--- you f--- you >be me 15 minutes ago >in uni lecture hall >law prof doing boring power point >gets to a part about the importance of documenting abuse of power >next slide >GeorgeFloyd_highres.jpeg >I let out one of those awkward nose snorkly sounds as I try not to laugh >prof hasn't even begun to read the slide >room was silent >people heard >the dude who sits two rows in front of me turns around and just stares at me with a look of confusion and disgust on his face >I try to play it off as having the sniffles F--- you /b/ this is all your fault for giving me a Pavlovian response to that picture

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon gets left on read | /r/Greentext

09/03/13(Tue)21:06 No.39411220 Replies: 39411264 Anonymous File: 1378256793017 png-(11 KB, 634x768, 1336358286402.png) >tfw she doesn't respond to your smoke signals
09/03/13(Tue)21:06 No.39411220 Replies: 39411264 Anonymous File: 1378256793017 png-(11 KB, 634x768, 1336358286402.png) >tfw she doesn't respond to your smoke signals

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext jaw organism gesture font