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Anon DM’s a jojo reference | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/30/19(Mon)02:13:41 No.68628658 >Be me >DMing a party for Curse of Strahd, 5e >Giving very brief description of module, something about traveling across the lands to defeat an ultra-powerful vampire lord 100 KB JPG >See players all start to look at each other >One asks if all the players can have known each other before the game started >"Sure" >They tell me they'll make the party >l ask if they're sure they want to do this on their own, as I usually help them with character creation >They ensure me they've got it this time >Not even a day later on Discord >Realize all my players are weebs as they send me pic related and ask if it's okay if they play them for this campaign >Can't tell if they're serious >Haven't responded yet I can't tell if this will be the worst or best game I'm about to DM : Anonymous 09/30/19(Mon)02:31:06 No.68628877 >>68628658_(OP) # Do it. You have to do it. Assume they're serious until proven otherwise. FIVE DIOS 63 KB PNG
: Anonymous 09/30/19(Mon)02:13:41 No.68628658 >Be me >DMing a party for Curse of Strahd, 5e >Giving very brief description of module, something about traveling across the lands to defeat an ultra-powerful vampire lord 100 KB JPG >See players all start to look at each other >One asks if all the players can have known each other before the game started >"Sure" >They tell me they'll make the party >l ask if they're sure they want to do this on their own, as I usually help them with character creation >They ensure me they've got it this time >Not even a day later on Discord >Realize all my players are weebs as they send me pic related and ask if it's okay if they play them for this campaign >Can't tell if they're serious >Haven't responded yet I can't tell if this will be the worst or best game I'm about to DM : Anonymous 09/30/19(Mon)02:31:06 No.68628877 >>68628658_(OP) # Do it. You have to do it. Assume they're serious until proven otherwise. FIVE DIOS 63 KB PNG

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Anon's b-day | /r/Greentext

File: images.jpg (8 KB, 225x225) O Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:15:45 No.64286630 >be me >Today is my birthday >No friends or anyone to celebrate >Supposed to be sad because social stigma >Choose not to be and have a good night >Pic related And that's how you flip their normie script boys O Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:17:42 No.64286645 File: mg7wjnt4wqr41.jpg (93 KB, 1125x1107) Happy birth date anniversary anon
File: images.jpg (8 KB, 225x225) O Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:15:45 No.64286630 >be me >Today is my birthday >No friends or anyone to celebrate >Supposed to be sad because social stigma >Choose not to be and have a good night >Pic related And that's how you flip their normie script boys O Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:17:42 No.64286645 File: mg7wjnt4wqr41.jpg (93 KB, 1125x1107) Happy birth date anniversary anon

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Anon doesn't like women | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Do you think you will be MGTOW(...) 06/24/21(Thu)12:31:44 No.64287025 when you are older will you >see blackpills daily about the evils of women >last one was about a guy giving up his dream of being a doctor for his high school sweetheart to be a dad 413 KB JPG >has 3 kids and reach their 50s together >daughter does DNA test and turns out this guys wife had an 11 year affair with neighbor and none of the kids are his >kills himself I just cant even like females anymore besides sexually wanting to f--- them Im coming to the conclusion even when they want to settle because they are getting ugly and old that they wont be loyal at all so I will have to accept being alone vs being with those selfish things caring for one
: Anonymous Do you think you will be MGTOW(...) 06/24/21(Thu)12:31:44 No.64287025 when you are older will you >see blackpills daily about the evils of women >last one was about a guy giving up his dream of being a doctor for his high school sweetheart to be a dad 413 KB JPG >has 3 kids and reach their 50s together >daughter does DNA test and turns out this guys wife had an 11 year affair with neighbor and none of the kids are his >kills himself I just cant even like females anymore besides sexually wanting to f--- them Im coming to the conclusion even when they want to settle because they are getting ugly and old that they wont be loyal at all so I will have to accept being alone vs being with those selfish things caring for one

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Anon hustles | /r/Greentext

No.772995598 06/30/18(Sat)05:29:45 R14kkDj.jpg JPG 35.1 KiB 657x527 >be me >be in 5th grade >class is planning field trip, need money >everyone needs to bring 20 dollars >go home, ask mom for 30 dollars so I can have 10 dollars extra for myself >mom doesn't believe me, goes to friend's house who lives on the same street >ohshit.gif >comes back angry, saying I need to pay more attention in class meetings >tfw I found out my friend told his parents that he needed 50 dollars
No.772995598 06/30/18(Sat)05:29:45 R14kkDj.jpg JPG 35.1 KiB 657x527 >be me >be in 5th grade >class is planning field trip, need money >everyone needs to bring 20 dollars >go home, ask mom for 30 dollars so I can have 10 dollars extra for myself >mom doesn't believe me, goes to friend's house who lives on the same street >ohshit.gif >comes back angry, saying I need to pay more attention in class meetings >tfw I found out my friend told his parents that he needed 50 dollars

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We all know anon is lying about having a gf | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)10:07:14 No.63077507 >used to have a hot ass gf >big ass DD t--- and skinny >they were perky and super nice >looked like tessa fowler or gianna michaels type s--- >miss them and still j------- to them 38 KB JPG >she has kids now and its been years and im pretty sure shes fat and destroyed >i lost a bunch of the pictures since then so ive just been jerking off to them same ones 10 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)10:36:12 No.63077832 >>63077507 (OP) # Well anon i come to r9k nowadays to laugh at people, so how or why did you lose her?
: Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)10:07:14 No.63077507 >used to have a hot ass gf >big ass DD t--- and skinny >they were perky and super nice >looked like tessa fowler or gianna michaels type s--- >miss them and still j------- to them 38 KB JPG >she has kids now and its been years and im pretty sure shes fat and destroyed >i lost a bunch of the pictures since then so ive just been jerking off to them same ones 10 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)10:36:12 No.63077832 >>63077507 (OP) # Well anon i come to r9k nowadays to laugh at people, so how or why did you lose her?

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anon finds a loli | /r/Greentext

>be me, work at pizza place >sometimes a little girl will come in and pick up a pizza by herself every week or so >female staff love her and know her by name >i always thought she lived across the street or something >today she came in soaked from head to toe >find out she lives a mile away >mfw this little loli walked a mile in the rain to pick up a pizza
>be me, work at pizza place >sometimes a little girl will come in and pick up a pizza by herself every week or so >female staff love her and know her by name >i always thought she lived across the street or something >today she came in soaked from head to toe >find out she lives a mile away >mfw this little loli walked a mile in the rain to pick up a pizza

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Anons tinder match hasn't done DMT | /r/Greentext

No.244428596 hours ago 1601829110194.jpg JPG 336.1 KIB 2000x1000 >match with girl >Get her number >Text >Asks me what type of podcasts I like >l tell her I listen to Joe rogan >She says "...seriously dude?" >Me: "hell yeah I love joe rogan!" >She gives me a peace sign emoji >"Unable to deliver message" 11 >Check tinder >She unmatched me Why does this s--- happen? 3 replies
No.244428596 hours ago 1601829110194.jpg JPG 336.1 KIB 2000x1000 >match with girl >Get her number >Text >Asks me what type of podcasts I like >l tell her I listen to Joe rogan >She says "...seriously dude?" >Me: "hell yeah I love joe rogan!" >She gives me a peace sign emoji >"Unable to deliver message" 11 >Check tinder >She unmatched me Why does this s--- happen? 3 replies

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Anon doesn’t like Steven Coward | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)04:36:49 No.857528642 >Loser who hangs around college campuses he is not enrolled at >Picks fights with retarded freshmen cause he thinks it makes him look good >Picks fight with some 80 KB JPG other retard online >Retard brings along a professional >NoShows because of professional >Cries online about how unfair the retard was to him Why is the right so full of cowards?
: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)04:36:49 No.857528642 >Loser who hangs around college campuses he is not enrolled at >Picks fights with retarded freshmen cause he thinks it makes him look good >Picks fight with some 80 KB JPG other retard online >Retard brings along a professional >NoShows because of professional >Cries online about how unfair the retard was to him Why is the right so full of cowards?

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Anon hates the therapy crisis | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:27:17 No.857553114 >be me >depressed as f--- >contemplating suicide >try to see therapist >every single therapist in the entire state is taking no Mron nerged 102 KB JPG patients >go to gp >says the hospital has a therapist and refers her to me >have to wait three weeks to see her >have a somewhat awkward but good talk that lasts 50 minutes >my next session with her is in 2 months >f--- 2021 >f--- therapy crisis View Thread
: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:27:17 No.857553114 >be me >depressed as f--- >contemplating suicide >try to see therapist >every single therapist in the entire state is taking no Mron nerged 102 KB JPG patients >go to gp >says the hospital has a therapist and refers her to me >have to wait three weeks to see her >have a somewhat awkward but good talk that lasts 50 minutes >my next session with her is in 2 months >f--- 2021 >f--- therapy crisis View Thread

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Autismatic for the people | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/21 (Wed)15:37:22 No.64279436 >be me >kinda feminine so people automatically assume l'm gay >haven't had any emotional or physical connection to a person in a long time >really f------ shy 59 KB PNG >don't understand social queues >never been able to get a gf >meet this one girl >think she understands me >shes really f------ cool, helps me a lot with emotions n stuff >thought this girl was flirting with me >she was really f------ hot, had the same sense of humor as me >finally ask her out >goes on a massive tangent about how she has no attraction to me and doesn't want me to get the wrong idea >next day starts telling me about boys she likes >flash forward a few months to today, been diagnosed with autism >just want a hug I know this isn't exactly the place to ask for advice on this stuff, just kinda wanted to get it out of my system. what am I doing wrong?
: Anonymous 06/23/21 (Wed)15:37:22 No.64279436 >be me >kinda feminine so people automatically assume l'm gay >haven't had any emotional or physical connection to a person in a long time >really f------ shy 59 KB PNG >don't understand social queues >never been able to get a gf >meet this one girl >think she understands me >shes really f------ cool, helps me a lot with emotions n stuff >thought this girl was flirting with me >she was really f------ hot, had the same sense of humor as me >finally ask her out >goes on a massive tangent about how she has no attraction to me and doesn't want me to get the wrong idea >next day starts telling me about boys she likes >flash forward a few months to today, been diagnosed with autism >just want a hug I know this isn't exactly the place to ask for advice on this stuff, just kinda wanted to get it out of my system. what am I doing wrong?

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DocAnon The Prequel | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/24/16(Thu)06:47:58 No.675573664 I Am Veteran Doctor >Be a new doctor >Very new >Man comes in with pains in the stomach >He said he hasn't ate in 4 days >Don't know what to do >Put leaches on his legs >After 17 jars he looks really pale >Are you a vampire? >"Nay" >That is what a vampire would say.manuscript >He is stabbed with a stake >He dies >l remember that vampires die if stabbed in the heart with wooden stake >He died so he must have been a vampire >King rewards me with 20 silver pieces and a nice hat >l am Doctor O reddit
Anonymous 03/24/16(Thu)06:47:58 No.675573664 I Am Veteran Doctor >Be a new doctor >Very new >Man comes in with pains in the stomach >He said he hasn't ate in 4 days >Don't know what to do >Put leaches on his legs >After 17 jars he looks really pale >Are you a vampire? >"Nay" >That is what a vampire would say.manuscript >He is stabbed with a stake >He dies >l remember that vampires die if stabbed in the heart with wooden stake >He died so he must have been a vampire >King rewards me with 20 silver pieces and a nice hat >l am Doctor O reddit

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Anon likes skittles | /r/Greentext


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Russian is a based language | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous [•19 06/23/21(Wed)06:11:44 No.147266204 >Because of the ISS, NASA astronauts have to learn fluent Russian >Because of Russian collaboration, chinese astronauts have to learn fluent Russian 7 KB JPG >In the future, Russian will be the language of space much like how English is the language of trade or French of the language of Africa
: Anonymous [•19 06/23/21(Wed)06:11:44 No.147266204 >Because of the ISS, NASA astronauts have to learn fluent Russian >Because of Russian collaboration, chinese astronauts have to learn fluent Russian 7 KB JPG >In the future, Russian will be the language of space much like how English is the language of trade or French of the language of Africa

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Anon is a rapper | /r/Greentext


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Anon goes to the gym | /r/Greentext


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Anon gets pinkeye | /r/Greentext

! Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)17:50:31 No.857519079 >taking s--- and crying >go to wipe tears >mfw 60é KB PNG
! Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)17:50:31 No.857519079 >taking s--- and crying >go to wipe tears >mfw 60é KB PNG

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anon watches pro wrestling | /r/Greentext


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Anon wonders what changed | /r/Greentext


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Marks mom is a sick freak | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/01/21(Sat)06:05:19 No.122719443 19423857235643qtr.jpg 22 KB JPG >>122718884 (OP) # >Let me break it down for you, Mark. Your mother and I have a relationship that's all about a master/slave dynamic. When I said she was more like a pet to me, I meant that in the most literal way possible. Remember that time you found a dog collar under the couch and I told you it's because we were getting you a dog? That was a lie, son. Truthfully, your mom likes it when I put her on a leash and walk her around the backyard. She's usually naked, of course. I can't explain why, but the whole thing is her idea. She'll piss on trees, sleep in dog cages, chew up furniture - she one took a full-sized, adult woman s--- in my Dockers. Your mother is one f------up slut, Mark. And I love her, but I'm not bringing that energy back to Viltrum with me. Frankly? She scares me sometimes. I don't know who molested her or how they did it, but there is some dark juju in that woman's head and I just don't know if I'm strong enough to f--- it all away.
Anonymous 05/01/21(Sat)06:05:19 No.122719443 19423857235643qtr.jpg 22 KB JPG >>122718884 (OP) # >Let me break it down for you, Mark. Your mother and I have a relationship that's all about a master/slave dynamic. When I said she was more like a pet to me, I meant that in the most literal way possible. Remember that time you found a dog collar under the couch and I told you it's because we were getting you a dog? That was a lie, son. Truthfully, your mom likes it when I put her on a leash and walk her around the backyard. She's usually naked, of course. I can't explain why, but the whole thing is her idea. She'll piss on trees, sleep in dog cages, chew up furniture - she one took a full-sized, adult woman s--- in my Dockers. Your mother is one f------up slut, Mark. And I love her, but I'm not bringing that energy back to Viltrum with me. Frankly? She scares me sometimes. I don't know who molested her or how they did it, but there is some dark juju in that woman's head and I just don't know if I'm strong enough to f--- it all away.

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Anon saves someone | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)17:26:22 No.857517553 >WE SAVED HIM! Yes! We did it team! We can keep him alive for decades! Sure he has no legs, no penis, no bottom half at all in fact, he'll never do anything sexual again. He'll never have children. He has no right arm, has to eject bodily waste into a bag for the rest of his life, can't work a job ever again, can't do anything physical ever again, willI have a very difficult time playing video games or operating a computer, he will need a care taker 170 KB JPG for the rest of his life, will be a drain on society, a depressing burden on his family, and will ptobably begin to mentally deteriorate and suffer once reality sets in that this will be the rest of his life until he dies, but that's okay, because we saved him. If this happened to an animal like a dog or a cat we'd put the animal down to end its suffering out of the kindness of our hearts, but not here, here, we saved him and he can live and live and live and if he ever tries to commit suicide we will easily put him on 24/7 Suicide watch to ensure he can live out his life to the fullest! We can keep him alive to suffer for decades! We are heroes. 82 Replies / 23 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)17:26:22 No.857517553 >WE SAVED HIM! Yes! We did it team! We can keep him alive for decades! Sure he has no legs, no penis, no bottom half at all in fact, he'll never do anything sexual again. He'll never have children. He has no right arm, has to eject bodily waste into a bag for the rest of his life, can't work a job ever again, can't do anything physical ever again, willI have a very difficult time playing video games or operating a computer, he will need a care taker 170 KB JPG for the rest of his life, will be a drain on society, a depressing burden on his family, and will ptobably begin to mentally deteriorate and suffer once reality sets in that this will be the rest of his life until he dies, but that's okay, because we saved him. If this happened to an animal like a dog or a cat we'd put the animal down to end its suffering out of the kindness of our hearts, but not here, here, we saved him and he can live and live and live and if he ever tries to commit suicide we will easily put him on 24/7 Suicide watch to ensure he can live out his life to the fullest! We can keep him alive to suffer for decades! We are heroes. 82 Replies / 23 Images View Thread

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