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Anons are displeased with Marvel | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:47:01 No.123946948 >age of ultron >they never tell you how old ultron is O Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:48:50 No.123946973 File: 1426388753140.gif (494 KB, 200x200) >infinity war >only lasts 15 minutes O Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:49:52 No.123946993 >>123946948 (OP). >Civil War >It's just an airport scuffle.
O Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:47:01 No.123946948 >age of ultron >they never tell you how old ultron is O Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:48:50 No.123946973 File: 1426388753140.gif (494 KB, 200x200) >infinity war >only lasts 15 minutes O Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:49:52 No.123946993 >>123946948 (OP). >Civil War >It's just an airport scuffle.

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Anon becomes a chad | /r/Greentext


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Anon makes a mistake | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)02:22:36 No.857462219 >hear people talking about Twitter and how bad it is >fuckit.png >make Twitter account >first tweet I see is a black woman calling a white guy 5 KB JPG "egg boy" >deactivate account
: Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)02:22:36 No.857462219 >hear people talking about Twitter and how bad it is >fuckit.png >make Twitter account >first tweet I see is a black woman calling a white guy 5 KB JPG "egg boy" >deactivate account

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Anon's grandpa has a stroke | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/16/19(Tue)17:08:23 No.53418817 >grandpa has stroke and falls down the stairs >suffers brain damage and left side of body is paralyzed >can never walk again and has to use a wheelchair >mom is worried that his brain will 8 KB JPG never recOver >he goes to treatment center for recovery >couple of months go by >it's father's day >my parents and I go to treatment center to see grandpa >grandpa gives wrapped gift to my dad >dad opens it >it's a p--- magazine This f------ madlad is going to make a full goddamn recovery. Mark my goddamn words
: Anonymous 07/16/19(Tue)17:08:23 No.53418817 >grandpa has stroke and falls down the stairs >suffers brain damage and left side of body is paralyzed >can never walk again and has to use a wheelchair >mom is worried that his brain will 8 KB JPG never recOver >he goes to treatment center for recovery >couple of months go by >it's father's day >my parents and I go to treatment center to see grandpa >grandpa gives wrapped gift to my dad >dad opens it >it's a p--- magazine This f------ madlad is going to make a full goddamn recovery. Mark my goddamn words

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Anon babysits lil bro | /r/Greentext


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The FC and his GF | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)07:55:36 No.857432338 >be me >the fart connoisseur >currently seeing this roastie with a 'uge dumper >this bitch got an ass like the back of a semi trailer 42 KB JPG >the smells that come outta this chicks ass are out of this world I tell you >she really enjoys her Mexican food too >burritostacoschimichangas.wav >l buy her as much fart producing Mexican food as she can possibly eat >l'm talking two whole meals and 3-4 sides at Taco Bell with extra spicy sauce >I purposely take a route back to her place that leads into peak hour after work traffic >stuck on the highway in gridlock awaiting my prize >soon enough I can tell she's uncomfortable >she tells me we have to pull over so she can use a bathroom >I tell her to just hold it >eventually she says 'sorry babe' and I begin to smell something >she goes to roll the window down >I stop her and say babe it's cold outside just keep them up I don't mind >success.doublecrunchwrap >l'm literally basking in her farts trying not to inhale deep lungfuls at a time >one round legit made my eyes water it was so pungent >she's visibly embarrassed whilst I'm extremely erect >decide to push my luck and grab her hand and put it on my hard on >she gives me a cheeky look and unzips me and takes my member out >proceeds to fart and jerk me off in traffic for about 20 mins until I nut buckets everywhere >she gets hungry about 2 hours later so I take her to get nachos >be me, the fart connoisseur
: Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)07:55:36 No.857432338 >be me >the fart connoisseur >currently seeing this roastie with a 'uge dumper >this bitch got an ass like the back of a semi trailer 42 KB JPG >the smells that come outta this chicks ass are out of this world I tell you >she really enjoys her Mexican food too >burritostacoschimichangas.wav >l buy her as much fart producing Mexican food as she can possibly eat >l'm talking two whole meals and 3-4 sides at Taco Bell with extra spicy sauce >I purposely take a route back to her place that leads into peak hour after work traffic >stuck on the highway in gridlock awaiting my prize >soon enough I can tell she's uncomfortable >she tells me we have to pull over so she can use a bathroom >I tell her to just hold it >eventually she says 'sorry babe' and I begin to smell something >she goes to roll the window down >I stop her and say babe it's cold outside just keep them up I don't mind >success.doublecrunchwrap >l'm literally basking in her farts trying not to inhale deep lungfuls at a time >one round legit made my eyes water it was so pungent >she's visibly embarrassed whilst I'm extremely erect >decide to push my luck and grab her hand and put it on my hard on >she gives me a cheeky look and unzips me and takes my member out >proceeds to fart and jerk me off in traffic for about 20 mins until I nut buckets everywhere >she gets hungry about 2 hours later so I take her to get nachos >be me, the fart connoisseur

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Anon meets a welfare queen | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: AG+NKCNK ) 06/22/21(Tue)20:25:00 No.327089237 Story time about a welfare queen I met in a bar >lives in government housing for free >gets most food paid for by the government >claims to work hard, but mostly just sits around collecting checks 36 KB JPG from the government >almost no expenses, spends governmentbux on shoes and other stupid s--- Pic unrelated >Private in the US army
: Anonymous (ID: AG+NKCNK ) 06/22/21(Tue)20:25:00 No.327089237 Story time about a welfare queen I met in a bar >lives in government housing for free >gets most food paid for by the government >claims to work hard, but mostly just sits around collecting checks 36 KB JPG from the government >almost no expenses, spends governmentbux on shoes and other stupid s--- Pic unrelated >Private in the US army

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Anon doesn't like dogs. | /r/Greentext

No.857419334 16 minutes ago deception.png PNG 49.2 KiB 617x450 >walking >angrydog.exe >oh no >run >dog is following me >hug tree >dog gets confused and goes away >unhug tree and run >dog appears again >hug another tree again >dog goes away again >wait >unhug tree again >no dog >go home That was a very weird day in the middle of Arkansas
No.857419334 16 minutes ago deception.png PNG 49.2 KiB 617x450 >walking >angrydog.exe >oh no >run >dog is following me >hug tree >dog gets confused and goes away >unhug tree and run >dog appears again >hug another tree again >dog goes away again >wait >unhug tree again >no dog >go home That was a very weird day in the middle of Arkansas

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Anon sends a photo to a girl | /r/Greentext

/. >first work day in steel industry >i send a girl a snap of me in my work clothes and with my helmet on, my face is full of dust >I write that i am extremely tired and exhausted >she posts the snap on insta where all her stupid friends who never did and most likely will never do any real work make fun of me >"haha im tired too" >"haha your trousers are too big, you should get new ones, they really dont fit you hahahaha" >why the f--- are girls like this? 14m (6/23 0:42) · 64266903 JPG · 4KB · (202 × 250) >>64266632 (OP) She's a dumb w----. Don't bother with her. 8m (6/23 0:48) · 64266965 If you're not lying (doubtful), that's very strange behaviour on her part. I'd cut all contact instantly if a girl did some weird s--- like that.
/. >first work day in steel industry >i send a girl a snap of me in my work clothes and with my helmet on, my face is full of dust >I write that i am extremely tired and exhausted >she posts the snap on insta where all her stupid friends who never did and most likely will never do any real work make fun of me >"haha im tired too" >"haha your trousers are too big, you should get new ones, they really dont fit you hahahaha" >why the f--- are girls like this? 14m (6/23 0:42) · 64266903 JPG · 4KB · (202 × 250) >>64266632 (OP) She's a dumb w----. Don't bother with her. 8m (6/23 0:48) · 64266965 If you're not lying (doubtful), that's very strange behaviour on her part. I'd cut all contact instantly if a girl did some weird s--- like that.

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Anon is french | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)09:59:40 No.857415324 history time >be fwansh >joie de vivre in 1838 >tootling down the street in Paris, looking for a baguette or a harlot >realize your boots are scuffed 19 KB JPG >notice a feces-covered urchin with a shoe-shining stand on a corner >ohlala.daguerrotype >toss the little bastard a franc, stick your boot on his bench, and tell him to go to town >become the first human being ever to be recorded in a photograph >pic related 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)10:01:17 No.857415390 >>857415324 (OP) # that picture looks like s---
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)09:59:40 No.857415324 history time >be fwansh >joie de vivre in 1838 >tootling down the street in Paris, looking for a baguette or a harlot >realize your boots are scuffed 19 KB JPG >notice a feces-covered urchin with a shoe-shining stand on a corner >ohlala.daguerrotype >toss the little bastard a franc, stick your boot on his bench, and tell him to go to town >become the first human being ever to be recorded in a photograph >pic related 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)10:01:17 No.857415390 >>857415324 (OP) # that picture looks like s---

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Anon has a little brother | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:00:56 No.857439822 >little brother says he wants to rub my boobs >I let him >he gets a boner and says he wants to be a girl when he grow up what do I do? 35 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:07:06 No.857440203 >>857439822 (OP) # He's probably being molested by the same person that did it to you. Bible says the only way to stop sodomites is to kill them both, victim included Leviticus 20:13 : Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:09:10 No.857440320 Get a strap on and give him the ride of his life?
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:00:56 No.857439822 >little brother says he wants to rub my boobs >I let him >he gets a boner and says he wants to be a girl when he grow up what do I do? 35 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:07:06 No.857440203 >>857439822 (OP) # He's probably being molested by the same person that did it to you. Bible says the only way to stop sodomites is to kill them both, victim included Leviticus 20:13 : Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)20:09:10 No.857440320 Get a strap on and give him the ride of his life?

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Anon is desperate :( | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)21:05:51 No.857418430 >dad is yelling he will kill his boss >he's ~10 beers in >he will soon fall asleep and pretend nothing happened How do I save someone from alcoholism, /b/? I'm tired of seeing him dying and not being able to do anything. 40 KB JPG 12 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)21:05:51 No.857418430 >dad is yelling he will kill his boss >he's ~10 beers in >he will soon fall asleep and pretend nothing happened How do I save someone from alcoholism, /b/? I'm tired of seeing him dying and not being able to do anything. 40 KB JPG 12 Replies View Thread

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Anon helps with the homeless problem | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)21:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands >last week find a hobo walking 272 KB JPG through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >I don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random n---- ghetto >I leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas 11 Replies / 3 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)21:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands >last week find a hobo walking 272 KB JPG through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >I don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random n---- ghetto >I leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas 11 Replies / 3 Images View Thread

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Cold comfort | /r/Greentext

! Anonymous (ID: 6JmEavWQ Scandinavia 06/20/21(Sun)12:11:28 No.326700990 We all know that Scandinavia is the world's greatest place to live, right? >attend college? Gets paid $1800 a month for attending >free healthcare (Yeah the taxes are high but you get so many advantages because of it) 39 KB JPG >are you a lowlife/criminal with no education or work? Get some welfare. $1050 a month for not lifting a finger. >get busted with 30 Terabytes of hardcore CP on your computer? No worries, 8 months jail time in the most luxurious prisons in the world. No need to register in a sex offender registry either because we don't have one. Literally no country can compete with Sweden/Denmark/Norway/Finland etc. Prove me wrong. >pro-tip you can't
! Anonymous (ID: 6JmEavWQ Scandinavia 06/20/21(Sun)12:11:28 No.326700990 We all know that Scandinavia is the world's greatest place to live, right? >attend college? Gets paid $1800 a month for attending >free healthcare (Yeah the taxes are high but you get so many advantages because of it) 39 KB JPG >are you a lowlife/criminal with no education or work? Get some welfare. $1050 a month for not lifting a finger. >get busted with 30 Terabytes of hardcore CP on your computer? No worries, 8 months jail time in the most luxurious prisons in the world. No need to register in a sex offender registry either because we don't have one. Literally no country can compete with Sweden/Denmark/Norway/Finland etc. Prove me wrong. >pro-tip you can't

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Anon likes trains | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:33:16 No.857434832 autism thread i'll start > be me > came across article that explains why autistic kids like trains typically >i liked trains as a kid 79 KB JPG > mfw i'm autistic
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:33:16 No.857434832 autism thread i'll start > be me > came across article that explains why autistic kids like trains typically >i liked trains as a kid 79 KB JPG > mfw i'm autistic

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Anon is into scat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)17:21:55 No.857430026 >Вe 14 >Meet girl online >Eventually meet up at the local ZOo >Have nice time >Eventually kiss in the Elephant 172 KB JPG House >Smells like Elephant S--- in there, don't care, happy >Fast Forward 20 Years >Associate the smell of s--- with romantic feelings How's your life going? View Thread
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)17:21:55 No.857430026 >Вe 14 >Meet girl online >Eventually meet up at the local ZOo >Have nice time >Eventually kiss in the Elephant 172 KB JPG House >Smells like Elephant S--- in there, don't care, happy >Fast Forward 20 Years >Associate the smell of s--- with romantic feelings How's your life going? View Thread

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Anon goes to gym | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)21:54:24 No.62209264 Kenmore Toast Crunch J O mn CHEEZIT T S o QUICK 3CEB356F-E730-43D7-9946-3772F47470ED.png 643 KB PNG >go to gym >30 minute intense cardio >go as heavy as possible on the chest press >sweat bullets >arms completely numb >out of breath >have high t moment >bring together all my courage >say "hi" to a woman in front of the gym >immediately go home
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)21:54:24 No.62209264 Kenmore Toast Crunch J O mn CHEEZIT T S o QUICK 3CEB356F-E730-43D7-9946-3772F47470ED.png 643 KB PNG >go to gym >30 minute intense cardio >go as heavy as possible on the chest press >sweat bullets >arms completely numb >out of breath >have high t moment >bring together all my courage >say "hi" to a woman in front of the gym >immediately go home

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Anon loses his balls. | /r/Greentext

No.9739620 4 hours ago EFC224EA-8B40-4C49-9899-42881473A0E0.jpg JPG 265.2 KİB 1284x1267 >be born >open your eyes for the first time and realize you were born a puppy >life's great >sucking on your moms t--- a family comes and says they're going to adopt you >weeks go by they take you home >life in your new home is great >few more weeks go by and you hear talk of "snipping your balls" >w--?? >go for car ride, licking your nuts and enjoying them whilst riding to the vet >you get there, breathe some funny gas, pass out >wake up >there's a cone around your head and an ominous feeling that something is missing >few days later you go to lick your balls That's when it hits you, they're f------ GONE. Such is the the life of the average dog in North America 1 reply
No.9739620 4 hours ago EFC224EA-8B40-4C49-9899-42881473A0E0.jpg JPG 265.2 KİB 1284x1267 >be born >open your eyes for the first time and realize you were born a puppy >life's great >sucking on your moms t--- a family comes and says they're going to adopt you >weeks go by they take you home >life in your new home is great >few more weeks go by and you hear talk of "snipping your balls" >w--?? >go for car ride, licking your nuts and enjoying them whilst riding to the vet >you get there, breathe some funny gas, pass out >wake up >there's a cone around your head and an ominous feeling that something is missing >few days later you go to lick your balls That's when it hits you, they're f------ GONE. Such is the the life of the average dog in North America 1 reply

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Anon gets topped. | /r/Greentext

No.857418256 41 minutes ago surprised-pepe-the-frog-with-o-shape-mouth-meme.jpg| JPG 61.3 KİB 720x692 >be me >bi curious beta boy >try the online dating game >get hit up by n----- >start talking as a joke >get to know him >he's real chilI, likes the vidya i do >start to get into eachother >"yo anon, lemme see dat azz!" >send it >"SHEEEIT anon! Azz fat az f--!" >sends his d--- >fuckingmonstercock.jpg >just like it is in blacked p--- >nervous af but we start hooking up >after a while he says he wants to bring a chick into this relationship >shes cute af >threesome.mp4 >after a while he says >"uh anon, maybe u can f-- me?" >MFW I'm f------ a 9/10 qt. and a n----- in the ass and they love my c--- 3 replies
No.857418256 41 minutes ago surprised-pepe-the-frog-with-o-shape-mouth-meme.jpg| JPG 61.3 KİB 720x692 >be me >bi curious beta boy >try the online dating game >get hit up by n----- >start talking as a joke >get to know him >he's real chilI, likes the vidya i do >start to get into eachother >"yo anon, lemme see dat azz!" >send it >"SHEEEIT anon! Azz fat az f--!" >sends his d--- >fuckingmonstercock.jpg >just like it is in blacked p--- >nervous af but we start hooking up >after a while he says he wants to bring a chick into this relationship >shes cute af >threesome.mp4 >after a while he says >"uh anon, maybe u can f-- me?" >MFW I'm f------ a 9/10 qt. and a n----- in the ass and they love my c--- 3 replies

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Anon is thankful | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)19:56:12 No.64263269 Prove why your god is real and Zeus is not? Checkmate religious (fairy-believers) That's what I thought. Religious people are stupid idiots. If you believe in one of the hundreds of thousands of gods humans have created over the past 50k years then you're an idiot, probably American as well. 1375060154087.jpg 414 KB JPG >tfw you realize the fedora meme completely killed internet atheism and turned it into a joke press t to thank the fedora meme
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)19:56:12 No.64263269 Prove why your god is real and Zeus is not? Checkmate religious (fairy-believers) That's what I thought. Religious people are stupid idiots. If you believe in one of the hundreds of thousands of gods humans have created over the past 50k years then you're an idiot, probably American as well. 1375060154087.jpg 414 KB JPG >tfw you realize the fedora meme completely killed internet atheism and turned it into a joke press t to thank the fedora meme

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