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Anon discusses "cresting" | /r/Greentext

1.41 MB PNG Be careful and fix your p--- addictions before it's too late. >I've worked in p--- production for 10 years, but I've never seen p--- used how Silicon Valley is deploying Al-generated virtual reality p--- to pacify unemployed young men. >They think Al will cause millions of layoffs and change the structure of society forever. UBI and distractions are needed to placate people. >The AI VR p--- induces an elongated orgasm they call "cresting," which optimizes dopamine and makes the technology habit-forming. Cresting feels like you have entered heaven, better than any painkiller >There are no content restrictions, and the algorithm pushes more and more dangerous/taboo content until you're hooked on genres you can't find anywhere else. It's $1.50 per use. >They already have lab facilities operating AI VR p---, and their test subjects are people who become mindless rats living for the next orgasm while scientists study their dopamine levels. They are working together with the p--- industry to release AI VR p--- in 2025 alongside UBI lobbying efforts for the 2024 election. This is all worlds away from the sexy videos I produced in 2015. It's multiplayer p--- used as a sedative. I could not have imagined something this dystopian happening in my lifetime.
1.41 MB PNG Be careful and fix your p--- addictions before it's too late. >I've worked in p--- production for 10 years, but I've never seen p--- used how Silicon Valley is deploying Al-generated virtual reality p--- to pacify unemployed young men. >They think Al will cause millions of layoffs and change the structure of society forever. UBI and distractions are needed to placate people. >The AI VR p--- induces an elongated orgasm they call "cresting," which optimizes dopamine and makes the technology habit-forming. Cresting feels like you have entered heaven, better than any painkiller >There are no content restrictions, and the algorithm pushes more and more dangerous/taboo content until you're hooked on genres you can't find anywhere else. It's $1.50 per use. >They already have lab facilities operating AI VR p---, and their test subjects are people who become mindless rats living for the next orgasm while scientists study their dopamine levels. They are working together with the p--- industry to release AI VR p--- in 2025 alongside UBI lobbying efforts for the 2024 election. This is all worlds away from the sexy videos I produced in 2015. It's multiplayer p--- used as a sedative. I could not have imagined something this dystopian happening in my lifetime.

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Anon recollects his friendships | /r/Greentext

File: supreme men.jpg (2 MB, 2765x3686) google yandex iqdb wait CET Anonymous 03/21/21(Sun)23:50:16 No.62857617 [1] [Reply] What kind of friend were you during your adolescence? Anonymous 03/21/23(Sun)23:52:40 No.62857645 >The goofy friend huhuuhehu >The sassy friend ahaahh yoouu again? >The cool friend wuts upp homiee >The smart friend Five times five equals twenty five! Anonymous 03/22/21 (Mon)03:03:26 No.62859234 the smelly one
File: supreme men.jpg (2 MB, 2765x3686) google yandex iqdb wait CET Anonymous 03/21/21(Sun)23:50:16 No.62857617 [1] [Reply] What kind of friend were you during your adolescence? Anonymous 03/21/23(Sun)23:52:40 No.62857645 >The goofy friend huhuuhehu >The sassy friend ahaahh yoouu again? >The cool friend wuts upp homiee >The smart friend Five times five equals twenty five! Anonymous 03/22/21 (Mon)03:03:26 No.62859234 the smelly one

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Anon doesn't flush the toilet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: XUYfPc81) 13 KB PNG 07/06/23(Thu)23:48:03 No.433569619 A wizard appears and gives you two options: >You can never again persecute immigrants Or >You lose your ability to flush toilets Obviously you choose the latter one. Now add your explanation to this thread as to why you never flush the toilet. I'm in need of a good explanation for my employer regarding why I didn't flush that massive s--- that I took on my first day of work.
: Anonymous (ID: XUYfPc81) 13 KB PNG 07/06/23(Thu)23:48:03 No.433569619 A wizard appears and gives you two options: >You can never again persecute immigrants Or >You lose your ability to flush toilets Obviously you choose the latter one. Now add your explanation to this thread as to why you never flush the toilet. I'm in need of a good explanation for my employer regarding why I didn't flush that massive s--- that I took on my first day of work.

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Anon lives in India | /r/Greentext

What a s------- we live in Anon 58 minutes ago 922853 No.66266 images.jpeg [Hide] (21.2KB, 558x550) Reverse > Filth everywhere, run down depressing infrastructure > Massive Unemployment and Poverty > Only 140k jobs getting created in organised sector, while 12M youth are coming to job market every year > Cost of necessary goods increasing > Appalling levels of malnutrition and stunting, national rank in GHI and average height of population declining > Proper Health care and Education almost absent for the masses Replies: >>66361 Anon 54 minutes ago 922853 No.66277 > Everyone hates each other and tries to pull eachother down > All politics is about jhunjunas and vote banks > Everyone with money and power (muh intellectuals, political leaders, bureaucrats, JEE/UPSC rankers) only care about personal resource acquisition Life in lundia is a curse
What a s------- we live in Anon 58 minutes ago 922853 No.66266 images.jpeg [Hide] (21.2KB, 558x550) Reverse > Filth everywhere, run down depressing infrastructure > Massive Unemployment and Poverty > Only 140k jobs getting created in organised sector, while 12M youth are coming to job market every year > Cost of necessary goods increasing > Appalling levels of malnutrition and stunting, national rank in GHI and average height of population declining > Proper Health care and Education almost absent for the masses Replies: >>66361 Anon 54 minutes ago 922853 No.66277 > Everyone hates each other and tries to pull eachother down > All politics is about jhunjunas and vote banks > Everyone with money and power (muh intellectuals, political leaders, bureaucrats, JEE/UPSC rankers) only care about personal resource acquisition Life in lundia is a curse

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anon makes history | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 27 KB JPG 5 Replies Anonymous >>902172873 (OP) # >Trump won 07/06/23(Thu)21:16:48 No.902172873 Due to some terrible clerical error you have been selected to be the first person to set foot on Mars. Your words will echo down the ages and become part of human culture forever more. What are your first words as you set foot on the red planet? : Anonymous >send nudes 07/06/23(Thu)21:25:32 No.902173325 : Anonymous >You will never be a woman View Thread 07/06/23(Thu)21:26:52 No.902173405 07/06/23(Thu)21:28:09 No.902173480
: Anonymous 27 KB JPG 5 Replies Anonymous >>902172873 (OP) # >Trump won 07/06/23(Thu)21:16:48 No.902172873 Due to some terrible clerical error you have been selected to be the first person to set foot on Mars. Your words will echo down the ages and become part of human culture forever more. What are your first words as you set foot on the red planet? : Anonymous >send nudes 07/06/23(Thu)21:25:32 No.902173325 : Anonymous >You will never be a woman View Thread 07/06/23(Thu)21:26:52 No.902173405 07/06/23(Thu)21:28:09 No.902173480

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Anon tries food delivery | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1/4 Satin Dolls BADA 201 KB PNG 07/06/23(Thu)21:42:17 No.73931205 >looking for a side jig to make a few extra bucks >fall for the reddit meme of using one of those delivery apps >decide on doordash >go through the process of signing up >a few days later im starting >excited to try something new >first order i accept is for mcdonalds with a reasonable tim >head over to the location >as i walk in theres like seven other dashers >have to wait like twenty minutes to pick up this persons food >start heading to the persons house >its a hand to person delivery so i knock on their door >a old hag opens up and i get blasted by the smell of cat piss >legit the most disgusting s--- i ever smelled >she just shuts the door afterwards without saying anything >get back to my car hoping the next order is better >2 minutes later i accept a order for popeyes >get the food extra quick this time >pull up to the persons house its another hand to person delivery >its all chain fenced up and i have to go through a gate >suddenly 3 putbulls run up out of no where barking and slamming themself into the fence >f--- that s--- i leave the food by the sidewalk and head back to my car >hear some guy yell "F-----" as i drive off >3rd order was for some guy outside the city wanting red lobster >check delivery information >"after reaching my house im actually at a cabin past my place follow the dirt trail at the end of the driveway unlock the trail gate with the key by the mailbox if you hear a gun thats just the neighbor hunting something" >cancel order >what the f--- is this s--- i was expecting to deliver to familys or high teens >cancel account and uninstall I'd rather just suck d--- for or something then this s--- 07/06/23(Thu)21:43:41 No.73931222 07/06/23(Thu)21:46:00 No.73931251 : Anonymous : Anonymous >>73931205 (OP) # Guy just wanted some red lobster
: Anonymous 1/4 Satin Dolls BADA 201 KB PNG 07/06/23(Thu)21:42:17 No.73931205 >looking for a side jig to make a few extra bucks >fall for the reddit meme of using one of those delivery apps >decide on doordash >go through the process of signing up >a few days later im starting >excited to try something new >first order i accept is for mcdonalds with a reasonable tim >head over to the location >as i walk in theres like seven other dashers >have to wait like twenty minutes to pick up this persons food >start heading to the persons house >its a hand to person delivery so i knock on their door >a old hag opens up and i get blasted by the smell of cat piss >legit the most disgusting s--- i ever smelled >she just shuts the door afterwards without saying anything >get back to my car hoping the next order is better >2 minutes later i accept a order for popeyes >get the food extra quick this time >pull up to the persons house its another hand to person delivery >its all chain fenced up and i have to go through a gate >suddenly 3 putbulls run up out of no where barking and slamming themself into the fence >f--- that s--- i leave the food by the sidewalk and head back to my car >hear some guy yell "F-----" as i drive off >3rd order was for some guy outside the city wanting red lobster >check delivery information >"after reaching my house im actually at a cabin past my place follow the dirt trail at the end of the driveway unlock the trail gate with the key by the mailbox if you hear a gun thats just the neighbor hunting something" >cancel order >what the f--- is this s--- i was expecting to deliver to familys or high teens >cancel account and uninstall I'd rather just suck d--- for or something then this s--- 07/06/23(Thu)21:43:41 No.73931222 07/06/23(Thu)21:46:00 No.73931251 : Anonymous : Anonymous >>73931205 (OP) # Guy just wanted some red lobster

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Anon should get a girlfriend. | /r/Greentext

>first time spending the night with new gf >wake up to the sound of her crying and a cold wet feeling from her side of the bed >She starts profusely apologizing to me >apparently she's a bedwetter >usually wears diapers to bed and has plastic mattress covers but was too embarrassed to use then with me here >starts rambling about how it's cu her uncle abused her and s--- >just try to calm her down and tell her it's ok >she finally calms down and thanks me for being so understanding >next night she puts on a diaper and puts a cover on the bed >notice her get up at least twice in the night to change diapers What the f--- have I gotten myself into guys.
>first time spending the night with new gf >wake up to the sound of her crying and a cold wet feeling from her side of the bed >She starts profusely apologizing to me >apparently she's a bedwetter >usually wears diapers to bed and has plastic mattress covers but was too embarrassed to use then with me here >starts rambling about how it's cu her uncle abused her and s--- >just try to calm her down and tell her it's ok >she finally calms down and thanks me for being so understanding >next night she puts on a diaper and puts a cover on the bed >notice her get up at least twice in the night to change diapers What the f--- have I gotten myself into guys.

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Tom - "Spanko!" | /r/Greentext

In the late 1600s, London was plagued by a sexual attacker, dubbed 'Whipping Tom', who would spank his victims with his hand or sometimes a rod and shout 'Spanko!' before running away. ping Tom ping Tone B122A23B-9CCE-45B3-9E8F-5E2E9EC5AFFB.jpg 213 KB JPG >1600 >Be me, Whipping Tom >Decide it would be humorous to slap some wenches on their bottoms >Starts as a joke but I quickly develop a liking for it, and become quite renound for my spankings, as I'm fleet of foot and yet to be caught >Flash forward over 400 years >Countless great and powerful men have died and been long forgotten, but my tale is still told and my name remembered >Spanko!
In the late 1600s, London was plagued by a sexual attacker, dubbed 'Whipping Tom', who would spank his victims with his hand or sometimes a rod and shout 'Spanko!' before running away. ping Tom ping Tone B122A23B-9CCE-45B3-9E8F-5E2E9EC5AFFB.jpg 213 KB JPG >1600 >Be me, Whipping Tom >Decide it would be humorous to slap some wenches on their bottoms >Starts as a joke but I quickly develop a liking for it, and become quite renound for my spankings, as I'm fleet of foot and yet to be caught >Flash forward over 400 years >Countless great and powerful men have died and been long forgotten, but my tale is still told and my name remembered >Spanko!

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“I like all music” | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 33 KB JPG 12/24/22(Sat)06:50:41 No.891308805 >Oh, my music taste? I just like songs that sound good.
Anonymous 33 KB JPG 12/24/22(Sat)06:50:41 No.891308805 >Oh, my music taste? I just like songs that sound good.

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Ultimate Driving Machine | /r/Greentext

File: pepe classic bmw.png (462 KB, 923x713) e39 540i supremacy Anonymous 02/27/23(Mon)12:22:28 No.26394888 >be me >19, highly educated >spend 20,000 hours researching the best car >discover the BMW e39 540i >water cooled alternator, damn thats hot >keep... researching the genius engineering >j------- a couple times >ffw to today >tell friends about it >"anon its just a p------------ BMW, if thats your choice its very underwhelming." Underwhelming? I'm sorry have you ever driven an e39 540i/6. It takes "Sheer Driving Pleasure to a higher plane of existence. To be fair, you have to have a high degree of technical skill, and driving ability, to understand the nuances of the M60/M62 platform. But once you do, the twin overhead cam, 4 valve per cylinder, monster of a V8 can fully come to life. The four- and two fifths liter engine produces an incredible 292 horse power, and slams down 440 newton meters of torque into the rear wheels. This refined German beast has the power of variable valve timing, of VANOS, which is the most reliable and effective way of keeping torque through the entire power band. Therefore, the superior German engineering shines through in this incredible V8. Let's not forget about the unbelievable quality and weight savings of the plastic dual-row timing chain guides, and the extra high-quality lightweight all-aluminum block. The m60 and m62 really offer an unrivaled refined German V8 muscle car experience found in not a single other engine. The high degree of excellence goes right over the head of the casual observer, but anyone who owns one knows, it is THE "Ultimate Driving Machine ™™
File: pepe classic bmw.png (462 KB, 923x713) e39 540i supremacy Anonymous 02/27/23(Mon)12:22:28 No.26394888 >be me >19, highly educated >spend 20,000 hours researching the best car >discover the BMW e39 540i >water cooled alternator, damn thats hot >keep... researching the genius engineering >j------- a couple times >ffw to today >tell friends about it >"anon its just a p------------ BMW, if thats your choice its very underwhelming." Underwhelming? I'm sorry have you ever driven an e39 540i/6. It takes "Sheer Driving Pleasure to a higher plane of existence. To be fair, you have to have a high degree of technical skill, and driving ability, to understand the nuances of the M60/M62 platform. But once you do, the twin overhead cam, 4 valve per cylinder, monster of a V8 can fully come to life. The four- and two fifths liter engine produces an incredible 292 horse power, and slams down 440 newton meters of torque into the rear wheels. This refined German beast has the power of variable valve timing, of VANOS, which is the most reliable and effective way of keeping torque through the entire power band. Therefore, the superior German engineering shines through in this incredible V8. Let's not forget about the unbelievable quality and weight savings of the plastic dual-row timing chain guides, and the extra high-quality lightweight all-aluminum block. The m60 and m62 really offer an unrivaled refined German V8 muscle car experience found in not a single other engine. The high degree of excellence goes right over the head of the casual observer, but anyone who owns one knows, it is THE "Ultimate Driving Machine ™™

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Anon finds a reason to live. | /r/Greentext

B hqdefault.jpg 23 KB JPG Dr 03 >be me >thinking of killing myself >realise if I kill myself then nikado avocado will have outlived me. >Continue to live
B hqdefault.jpg 23 KB JPG Dr 03 >be me >thinking of killing myself >realise if I kill myself then nikado avocado will have outlived me. >Continue to live

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Anon takes a nap | /r/Greentext

File: k9.jpg (188 KB, 1200x1800) Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)22:49:52 No.73927589 ► > be me yesterday > not good today, really tired as s---, this is unusual > ask boss if I can take a day off tomorrow > "yeah sure" > finish day of work, go back home, gf not there, only kid > climb upstairs to take a nap > shut down my phone and leave it on the table > dog comes in, licks my feet, tell him to stop > dog climbs on the bed, sticks to me > cat arrives, does same s---, two furrballs sticking on me > I'm too hot, leave the bed > go downstairs, son is playing Mario Kart > decide to go outside in the hammock > quickly annoyed by outside noises > for the one time I need some calm, son decides to play outside > FFS > leave hammock, wander around the house > enter garage, see inflatable matress in pile of camping stuff > idea.jpg > take matress, shove it in a bag, take a bike and go to nearby woods > find a quiet place, load the matress and lay down > quickly fall asleep > suddently awaken by cold dog noise licking me > darned dog at it again, except not my dog > notice sun is at the opposite side of the sky and it feels cold > ear "Found him! Found him !" > People in uniform coming to me > "You Anon Anonymous ?" > "Yup that's me, what is going on ?" Turned out little nap turned into full night sleep in the woods. GF got worried sick because I was not answering the phone and called the police. Police quickly reacted because it seems a well known fact to everybody in town that I display some autistic traits, like having a day to day oiled routine, so suddently disappearing from the house surrely meant I got kidnapped or something. GF is mad as f---, so no thurday recreational fornication tonight How was your day Anon ?
File: k9.jpg (188 KB, 1200x1800) Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)22:49:52 No.73927589 ► > be me yesterday > not good today, really tired as s---, this is unusual > ask boss if I can take a day off tomorrow > "yeah sure" > finish day of work, go back home, gf not there, only kid > climb upstairs to take a nap > shut down my phone and leave it on the table > dog comes in, licks my feet, tell him to stop > dog climbs on the bed, sticks to me > cat arrives, does same s---, two furrballs sticking on me > I'm too hot, leave the bed > go downstairs, son is playing Mario Kart > decide to go outside in the hammock > quickly annoyed by outside noises > for the one time I need some calm, son decides to play outside > FFS > leave hammock, wander around the house > enter garage, see inflatable matress in pile of camping stuff > idea.jpg > take matress, shove it in a bag, take a bike and go to nearby woods > find a quiet place, load the matress and lay down > quickly fall asleep > suddently awaken by cold dog noise licking me > darned dog at it again, except not my dog > notice sun is at the opposite side of the sky and it feels cold > ear "Found him! Found him !" > People in uniform coming to me > "You Anon Anonymous ?" > "Yup that's me, what is going on ?" Turned out little nap turned into full night sleep in the woods. GF got worried sick because I was not answering the phone and called the police. Police quickly reacted because it seems a well known fact to everybody in town that I display some autistic traits, like having a day to day oiled routine, so suddently disappearing from the house surrely meant I got kidnapped or something. GF is mad as f---, so no thurday recreational fornication tonight How was your day Anon ?

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Anon is cursed by emos | /r/Greentext

File: 250x250_Free_Smiley.gif (41KB, 250x250px) Image search: [Google] www.free-smiley.de Anonymous 2017-06-28 07:28:14 Post No. 19216605 [Report] >>19216605 They did it wrong. >Be me, freshman in high school >Bully this one quiet emo kid >Turns out, he's a wiccan >Ohshit.jpg >Him and his wiccan friends put a curse on me >Curse to suffer in agony for the rest of my life >Pray to their gods, the curse is set >mwf I'm good >mfw 10 years later, still good What happened here, /x? Did their curse fail, or are wiccans poo-poo, and stink? >> Anonymous 2017-06-28 07:33:10 Post No.19216628 [Report] Hahaha xdd Le nice story >> Anonymous 2017-06-28 07:34:42 Post No.19216632 [Report] >> Anonymous 2017-06-28 07:35:00 Post No.19216634 [Report] >>19216605 You've been suffering so hard and so long you don't even know what joy is.
File: 250x250_Free_Smiley.gif (41KB, 250x250px) Image search: [Google] www.free-smiley.de Anonymous 2017-06-28 07:28:14 Post No. 19216605 [Report] >>19216605 They did it wrong. >Be me, freshman in high school >Bully this one quiet emo kid >Turns out, he's a wiccan >Ohshit.jpg >Him and his wiccan friends put a curse on me >Curse to suffer in agony for the rest of my life >Pray to their gods, the curse is set >mwf I'm good >mfw 10 years later, still good What happened here, /x? Did their curse fail, or are wiccans poo-poo, and stink? >> Anonymous 2017-06-28 07:33:10 Post No.19216628 [Report] Hahaha xdd Le nice story >> Anonymous 2017-06-28 07:34:42 Post No.19216632 [Report] >> Anonymous 2017-06-28 07:35:00 Post No.19216634 [Report] >>19216605 You've been suffering so hard and so long you don't even know what joy is.

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Anon leaves his house. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/26/21(Mon)17:44:43 No.647233 >finally get a wagecuck job after years of being a neet >furniture warehouse position where I basically just move mattresses around >work is only like 2-3 hours out of the 8 hour day >most of the time is just all the warehouse guys hanging out 42 KB JPG >get health insurance and am getting dental work done for basically free >have a reason to get up in the morning >get some exercise >customers thank me and I feel like I'm doing something >am actually socializing and got invited to my first adult party at 25 years old today >am actually making some money You guys f------ lied. Being a neet is way worse than this
Anonymous 01/26/21(Mon)17:44:43 No.647233 >finally get a wagecuck job after years of being a neet >furniture warehouse position where I basically just move mattresses around >work is only like 2-3 hours out of the 8 hour day >most of the time is just all the warehouse guys hanging out 42 KB JPG >get health insurance and am getting dental work done for basically free >have a reason to get up in the morning >get some exercise >customers thank me and I feel like I'm doing something >am actually socializing and got invited to my first adult party at 25 years old today >am actually making some money You guys f------ lied. Being a neet is way worse than this

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Anon uses a hairbrush | /r/Greentext

-File: IMG_3189.jpg (71 KB, 1024x1024) << Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)17:00:54 No.902139380 [Reply]► >>902139508 >>902139532 My fiancé just walked in on me in the bathroom squatting and jerking off with one of her hair brushes in my ass She was supposed to be at work but she finished early The p--- on my phone was too loud I didn't hear her come in She walked in, we locked eyes and it was silent for about 3 seconds before she walked out closing the door It's been 10 minutes and I've locked myself in the bathroom and I refuse to leave Comment too long. Click here to view the full text. + 1 reply omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)17:04:25 No.902139508 ► >>902139380 (OP) God, I wish this were true. Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)17:04:44 No.902139517 ► You locked eyes. It's over. You never lock eyes in that situation. □ Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)17:05:13 No.902139532 >>902139380 (OP) Post hairbrush in your bussy
-File: IMG_3189.jpg (71 KB, 1024x1024) << Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)17:00:54 No.902139380 [Reply]► >>902139508 >>902139532 My fiancé just walked in on me in the bathroom squatting and jerking off with one of her hair brushes in my ass She was supposed to be at work but she finished early The p--- on my phone was too loud I didn't hear her come in She walked in, we locked eyes and it was silent for about 3 seconds before she walked out closing the door It's been 10 minutes and I've locked myself in the bathroom and I refuse to leave Comment too long. Click here to view the full text. + 1 reply omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)17:04:25 No.902139508 ► >>902139380 (OP) God, I wish this were true. Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)17:04:44 No.902139517 ► You locked eyes. It's over. You never lock eyes in that situation. □ Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)17:05:13 No.902139532 >>902139380 (OP) Post hairbrush in your bussy

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Anon Is A Boomer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous m MONSTER 77 KB PNG 06/30/23(Fri)12:48:58 No.901808699 >I remember when I first heard Day Tripper in the rice paddies of Vietnam, where I met my first wife >Look the manager in the eyes and give him a firm handshake, and you'll get the job >Disco sucks >Maybe Vietnam was a lie or maybe it wasn't, either way I don't regret serving the great US of A >Jimmy Carter would be the worst president ever...if not for BRANDON, heh >Reagan was one of our best presidents (even though charts showed wage growth went to s--- after he took office and never recovered) >You want free oxygen? That's SOCIALIST. >Want to afford a house and have a healthy middle class? What are you, WOKE? >*only used the Internet for chain emails/Facebook pre-2016, then invades and s---- all over 4chan/Twitter in 2016 after /r/the_donald got banned; primarily uses /v/, /tv/, and /pol/*
: Anonymous m MONSTER 77 KB PNG 06/30/23(Fri)12:48:58 No.901808699 >I remember when I first heard Day Tripper in the rice paddies of Vietnam, where I met my first wife >Look the manager in the eyes and give him a firm handshake, and you'll get the job >Disco sucks >Maybe Vietnam was a lie or maybe it wasn't, either way I don't regret serving the great US of A >Jimmy Carter would be the worst president ever...if not for BRANDON, heh >Reagan was one of our best presidents (even though charts showed wage growth went to s--- after he took office and never recovered) >You want free oxygen? That's SOCIALIST. >Want to afford a house and have a healthy middle class? What are you, WOKE? >*only used the Internet for chain emails/Facebook pre-2016, then invades and s---- all over 4chan/Twitter in 2016 after /r/the_donald got banned; primarily uses /v/, /tv/, and /pol/*

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Anon plays a devious prank on his brother | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/05/23(Wed)23:36:22 No.73920911 >be me 'IT'S JUST A PRANK BRO >have a younger brother 44 KB JPG >he and I have never gotten along >nothing severe, we just didn't have anything in common >we both moved out at age 18 and more or less fell out of contact >haven't seen him since our dad's funeral in 2020 >his 27th birthday is coming up >come up with a devious plan >reach out to his wife on Instagram >explain the situation and ask if there's anything he's mentioned that he really wants >she tells me he loves antique cars and model cars >get a custom made die cast model of the car our dad had when we were kids, a 1977 Mercury Cougar in sky blue >order it sent to his apartment under his wife's name >takes six weeks to arrive, I can barely wait >she sends me a video of him unwrapping and opening it >his face lights up, I can't be sure but it looked like he teared up a little Get pranked little bro. I know we don't talk but I love you. 07/05/23(Wed)23:39:05 No.73920933 : Anonymous >>73920911 (OP) # Reading this made me smile. What a wholesome and based anon this is.
Anonymous 07/05/23(Wed)23:36:22 No.73920911 >be me 'IT'S JUST A PRANK BRO >have a younger brother 44 KB JPG >he and I have never gotten along >nothing severe, we just didn't have anything in common >we both moved out at age 18 and more or less fell out of contact >haven't seen him since our dad's funeral in 2020 >his 27th birthday is coming up >come up with a devious plan >reach out to his wife on Instagram >explain the situation and ask if there's anything he's mentioned that he really wants >she tells me he loves antique cars and model cars >get a custom made die cast model of the car our dad had when we were kids, a 1977 Mercury Cougar in sky blue >order it sent to his apartment under his wife's name >takes six weeks to arrive, I can barely wait >she sends me a video of him unwrapping and opening it >his face lights up, I can't be sure but it looked like he teared up a little Get pranked little bro. I know we don't talk but I love you. 07/05/23(Wed)23:39:05 No.73920933 : Anonymous >>73920911 (OP) # Reading this made me smile. What a wholesome and based anon this is.

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plot twist | /r/Greentext

Anonymous TOU Grumpy Animais ✰✰✰✰✰Verified Purchase Great Toddler Book 06/07/2023, 18:35:57 No.43652604 Reviewed in the United States on October 2, 2020 Bought for my 2-year old niece. Didn't read the description but it's fine because she can't read. 170 people found this helpful WHAT'S FOR LUNCHP ME TAKE A LET ME GUESS ONCE I GET MY S--- TOGETHER IT'S OVER FOR YOU BITCHES 126 KB JPEG > be me, given the task of buying a gift for tiny niece by Mrs Anon > see a cartoon book called 100 Grumpy Animals with cute animals > buy the heck out of it > give it to 2 year old niece. > everyone in the room notices at the same time it's actually a book for adults with LOTS of bad words > she can't read yet. loves the pictures noneedtopanic.wav > leave a 5 star review because she can't read yet. and all is still good in anon's house
Anonymous TOU Grumpy Animais ✰✰✰✰✰Verified Purchase Great Toddler Book 06/07/2023, 18:35:57 No.43652604 Reviewed in the United States on October 2, 2020 Bought for my 2-year old niece. Didn't read the description but it's fine because she can't read. 170 people found this helpful WHAT'S FOR LUNCHP ME TAKE A LET ME GUESS ONCE I GET MY S--- TOGETHER IT'S OVER FOR YOU BITCHES 126 KB JPEG > be me, given the task of buying a gift for tiny niece by Mrs Anon > see a cartoon book called 100 Grumpy Animals with cute animals > buy the heck out of it > give it to 2 year old niece. > everyone in the room notices at the same time it's actually a book for adults with LOTS of bad words > she can't read yet. loves the pictures noneedtopanic.wav > leave a 5 star review because she can't read yet. and all is still good in anon's house

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Anon has a thing for Nicola Sturgeon. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous File: Nicola Sturgeon 2.jpg (1.37 MB, 2832x4256) 09/12/14(Fri)23:05:34 No.35652357 >>35652413 >>35652474 >>35652513 >>35652523 Daily reminder that for an Irn bru and a bag of chips you could force your superior English shaft up this flower of Scotland's anus and stir last night's haggis Anonymous 09/12/14(Fri)23:08:36 No.35652474 >>35652357 That is literally the most sickening thing I have ever read on 4chan.
Anonymous File: Nicola Sturgeon 2.jpg (1.37 MB, 2832x4256) 09/12/14(Fri)23:05:34 No.35652357 >>35652413 >>35652474 >>35652513 >>35652523 Daily reminder that for an Irn bru and a bag of chips you could force your superior English shaft up this flower of Scotland's anus and stir last night's haggis Anonymous 09/12/14(Fri)23:08:36 No.35652474 >>35652357 That is literally the most sickening thing I have ever read on 4chan.

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German humor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12 KB JPG 07/06/23(Thu)18:14:33 No.184255728 Translate a joke from your country : Anonymous Two hunters meet. Both are dead. 07/06/23(Thu)19:05:43 No.18425758 >>184257927 # >>184258192 # >>184258442 # >>184258089 # : Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)19:14:41 No.18425792 >>184257583 # >behold the peak of german comedy
: Anonymous 12 KB JPG 07/06/23(Thu)18:14:33 No.184255728 Translate a joke from your country : Anonymous Two hunters meet. Both are dead. 07/06/23(Thu)19:05:43 No.18425758 >>184257927 # >>184258192 # >>184258442 # >>184258089 # : Anonymous 07/06/23(Thu)19:14:41 No.18425792 >>184257583 # >behold the peak of german comedy

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