Man Accused of Being Neo-Nazi Lied About Stabbing

When it comes to making a point, neo-Nazis tend to take things a bit literally.

Last week, a man named Josh Witt made the headlines in the social and news media circuits, including Fox News, the New York Post and, um, The Alex Jones Show, after his anecdote about getting stabbed by a stranger for his "Hitler Youth" haircut went viral on Facebook. In the post, the 26-year-old Colorado resident initially claimed that his hand was stabbed by a "black male" who supposedly approached him and accused him of looking like a neo-Nazi. The original Facebook post, which has since been deleted, featured pictures of his bloody hands and his heart-wrenching story of being mistaken for a racist:

"Sooooooo apparently I look like a neo-nazi and got stabbed for it. luckily I put my hands up to stop it so he only stabbed my hand…. please keep in mind there was no conversation between me and this dude I was literally just getting out of my car."

Well, the good news for Joshua Witt is that his assailant has been caught. The weird part is that the mysterious man who stabbed Joshua Witt is… Joshua Witt. Yup, it turns out he stabbed himself and made the whole thing up. That’s one way to hide the fact that you “accidentally” stabbed yourself minutes after buying a knife.

According to the Sheridan Police Department, Witt admitted to a false report.

In his initial report, Witt told police that a black male, about 5'10" had stabbed him after asking, "Are you a neo-Nazi?" The 26-year-old courageously blocked knife attacks from the small blade, ending up with some cuts on the hand. He then shared the incident on Facebook, where the story got attention of such trustworthy outlets as, um, The Alex Jones Show. Aim for the stars and you end up in the clouds.

However, Sheridan Police weren't necessarily buying the story because video surveillance showed no one running from the scene. However, they did find video surveillance of Witt buying the knife he stabbed himself with. When they re-interviewed him, Witt admitted "to accidentally cutting himself with the knife while parked in his car in front of the sporting goods store and admitted making up the story about being attacked."

Police have since charged Witt with false reporting to authorities, which comes with a fine of up to $2,650 and a year in jail. Plus, you know, the embarrassment of making such an awful story up to presumably bolster some racist cause. Kudos, Joshua Witt, you’re one wild and crazy guy. And another lesson learned: trust nobody, not even yourself.