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There’s an impressive array of weapons to choose from

Grover crashes Mr. Johnson's Renaissance Faire performance to demonstrate how he would have killed his wife in the 16th century

Grover crashes Mr. Johnson's Renaissance Faire performance to demonstrate how he would have killed his wife in the 16th century

bertstrips grover mr.johnson

Fake news

CNN's Anderson Cooper, in his native environment, spreading the false prophecy of the virtues of a--- sex.

CNN's Anderson Cooper, in his native environment, spreading the false prophecy of the virtues of a--- sex.

bertstrips cnn anderson cooper

Run, cookie moster, run

HIDE After hearing the FBI knock on his door, Cookie Monster realizes what to do with the evidence

HIDE After hearing the FBI knock on his door, Cookie Monster realizes what to do with the evidence

bertstrips cookie monster

A small oopsie

When child protective services break into the bathroom, Bert immediately shouts that the missing children told him they were 18.

When child protective services break into the bathroom, Bert immediately shouts that the missing children told him they were 18.

bertstrips bert

"This isn't what it looks like, you guys!"

Grover's brilliant plan to trap puffins backfires dramatically when he ends up attracting members of a furry fanatic convention.

Grover's brilliant plan to trap puffins backfires dramatically when he ends up attracting members of a furry fanatic convention.

bertstrips grover furry

bert's clone

Bert doesn't know what's more confusing: the fact that Ernie has successfully cloned a living Muppet with pipe cleaners, coaxial cables & Mountain Dew, or that "Bret" calls Ernie "his better half"...

Bert doesn't know what's more confusing: the fact that Ernie has successfully cloned a living Muppet with pipe cleaners, coaxial cables & Mountain Dew, or that "Bret" calls Ernie "his better half"...

bertstrips bert

"accident"

Kermit had planned the "accident". He knew that Miss Piggy was too fat to slide through the bottom of the elevator, and that she couldn't climb through the top. It was only a matter of time before the cable keeping her alive snapped

Kermit had planned the "accident". He knew that Miss Piggy was too fat to slide through the bottom of the elevator, and that she couldn't climb through the top. It was only a matter of time before the cable keeping her alive snapped

bertstrips the muppets kermit miss piggy

Don't do drugs, kids

Big Bird gets wasted hardcore after snorting so much cocaine

Big Bird gets wasted hardcore after snorting so much cocaine

bertstrips big bird

20 seconds is all Ernie needs

The drug dealer bets Ernie a bag of crack that he can't kill those kids in under a minute, Ernie laughed when he said "under a minute."

The drug dealer bets Ernie a bag of crack that he can't kill those kids in under a minute, Ernie laughed when he said "under a minute."

bertstrips ernie

Big bird's escaped slave

A shocking discovery is made! Elmo finds in his closet a huge group of the plantation slaves who escaped from Big

A shocking discovery is made! Elmo finds in his closet a huge group of the plantation slaves who escaped from Big

bertstrips elmo big bird

Ernie's trap

Bert discovers Ernie's trap too late as the now-insane child predator surprises him from the ceiling.

Bert discovers Ernie's trap too late as the now-insane child predator surprises him from the ceiling.

bertstrips bert ernie

A Channel from the Land of the Rising Boner

Bert and Ernie are thankful to find the Japanese p--- channel

Bert and Ernie are thankful to find the Japanese p--- channel

bertstrips bert ernie hentai

One Crazy Night in Sesame Street

It's a cold Saturday morning. Elmo wakes up with a huge headache to the sound of a black man telling him to wake up. The man tells Elmo that he owes him thousands in damages, and to never speak to his girlfriend ever again. Elmo doesn't remember what happened the previous night. The only thing he remembers from that night is that he ate some candy that Grover gave to him. Everything else after that was just a blank.

It's a cold Saturday morning. Elmo wakes up with a huge headache to the sound of a black man telling him to wake up. The man tells Elmo that he owes him thousands in damages, and to never speak to his girlfriend ever again. Elmo doesn't remember what happened the previous night. The only thing he remembers from that night is that he ate some candy that Grover gave to him. Everything else after that was just a blank.

bertstrips elmo

Elmo's retarded child slave orgy

My Recording SESAME STREET This is the bathroom... oops! Excuse us! 7 Elmo accidentally shows Bert his retarded child slave o---. Bert is surprised. He had never seen something.., so amazing, so majestic, he really thinks of it as art.

My Recording SESAME STREET This is the bathroom... oops! Excuse us! 7 Elmo accidentally shows Bert his retarded child slave o---. Bert is surprised. He had never seen something.., so amazing, so majestic, he really thinks of it as art.

betrstrips bert elmo

Science is fun

NTR Ernie spends three hours each night in bed listing off the things Bert did in Vietnam to test his hypothesis that enough guilt can stop a man's heart

NTR Ernie spends three hours each night in bed listing off the things Bert did in Vietnam to test his hypothesis that enough guilt can stop a man's heart

bertstrips bert ernie vietnam

Ernie's sex party

Bert gets incredibly tired of all these sex o--- parties Ernie keeps hosting every night and how he always gets him to be more involved in them.

Bert gets incredibly tired of all these sex o--- parties Ernie keeps hosting every night and how he always gets him to be more involved in them.

ernie bert annoyed

elmo's revenage

Elmo uses his ability to rip holes in spacetime in order to publicly shame Ernie for touching himself in the communal bathtub.

Elmo uses his ability to rip holes in spacetime in order to publicly shame Ernie for touching himself in the communal bathtub.

betrstrips elmo ernie

Telly's big rant

UI the people at the public libary are getting really tired of Telly's daily 3 hour rant on how the n---- and the jew are ruining the white man's America

UI the people at the public libary are getting really tired of Telly's daily 3 hour rant on how the n---- and the jew are ruining the white man's America

betrstips telly

Pepperoni Time

Even Kermit is shocked when Miss Piggy starts cannibalizing her own people

Even Kermit is shocked when Miss Piggy starts cannibalizing her own people

betrstrips the muppets kermit miss piggy animal

Good night

ty Telly is woken up by the domestic violence of his upstairs neighbours, Ernie and Bert. As the noise is suddenly silenced by a gunshot, he goes back to sleep, pleased that they found a way to settle their argument

ty Telly is woken up by the domestic violence of his upstairs neighbours, Ernie and Bert. As the noise is suddenly silenced by a gunshot, he goes back to sleep, pleased that they found a way to settle their argument

betrstrips telly bert ernie