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Captain Ernie's poor decision making

Either that iceberg is gonna move aside or l am, and my momma didn't raise no p----

Either that iceberg is gonna move aside or l am, and my momma didn't raise no p----

bertstrips ernie titanic sesame street iceberg

Telly tells it how it is

Finders Keeper lelly explains why he won't return the missing children

Finders Keeper lelly explains why he won't return the missing children

telly missing children

final form

SESAME STREET rg Tired of Mr.Johnson's arthritic b-------, Grover ascends to his final form

SESAME STREET rg Tired of Mr.Johnson's arthritic b-------, Grover ascends to his final form

grover mr johnson mr.johnson

Snuffy's secret life

Snuffy assumes his fursona on his way to a local con.

Snuffy assumes his fursona on his way to a local con.

"Thanks a lot BIRD!"

Snuffy becomes agitated and prepares to slaughter everybody in the city. Big Bird does not know what in the f--- to do.

Snuffy becomes agitated and prepares to slaughter everybody in the city. Big Bird does not know what in the f--- to do.

big bird snuffy

No wonder why it was so sticky.

Ernie suddenly realizes that the glass in Bert's room doesn't contain "Vanilla Milkshake"

Ernie suddenly realizes that the glass in Bert's room doesn't contain "Vanilla Milkshake"

Falcons are the fastest flying birds

Ernie states random bird facts and triggers Bert into an episode

Ernie states random bird facts and triggers Bert into an episode

bert ernie birds facts

Nebby has a Revelation

In the midst of pleasure, Nebby realizes in horror that she has been growing a liking for bags.

In the midst of pleasure, Nebby realizes in horror that she has been growing a liking for bags.

nebby lunala getinthebagnebby bag pokemonsunandmoon pokemon bertstrips

Rev up those pyres

2T Ten minutes into the campus activist's lecture about the "gender spectrum", Murray is slowly beginning to realize why the Church used to burn witches.

2T Ten minutes into the campus activist's lecture about the "gender spectrum", Murray is slowly beginning to realize why the Church used to burn witches.

murray sesame street bertstrips regressive leftist ideology some beliefs objectively don't deserve to exist

Bertstrip

One of Ernie's favorite holiday traditions is calling children and telling them Santa isn't real and they are the reason that their parents aren't happy

One of Ernie's favorite holiday traditions is calling children and telling them Santa isn't real and they are the reason that their parents aren't happy

ernie bert bertstrips santa

Bert didn't blame him, those verses were satanic.

Bert learns a local Imam has issued a fatwa calling for his death in response to a poem about muslims Bert drunkenly improvised the previous week.

Bert learns a local Imam has issued a fatwa calling for his death in response to a poem about muslims Bert drunkenly improvised the previous week.

bertstrips bert ernie fatwa

The temptation for the sensation of aggravation without hesitation on the plantation caused ejaculation.

Big Bird does his hourly drive-by of laughing at the slaves on his plantation

Big Bird does his hourly drive-by of laughing at the slaves on his plantation

big bird wagon laughing slave plantation

Better dead than Red

Bert's day out in the park is ruined when a Communist walks by

Bert's day out in the park is ruined when a Communist walks by

bert elmo communism

Oh...

2 Granny Bird tucks her grandson into bed, knowing that when he wakes up, she will be there for him no more

2 Granny Bird tucks her grandson into bed, knowing that when he wakes up, she will be there for him no more

bertstrips big bird grandma

Quite Embarrassing

Grover's sexy role-play scenario took a turn for the worst when he asked Mr. Johnson to pretend to be his dead mother

Grover's sexy role-play scenario took a turn for the worst when he asked Mr. Johnson to pretend to be his dead mother

grover mr johnson roleplay

At least he was teach them.

Kermit's sex ed class goes horribly wrong when his sidekick Elmo decides now was the perfect time to masturbate in a room full of children.

Kermit's sex ed class goes horribly wrong when his sidekick Elmo decides now was the perfect time to masturbate in a room full of children.

kermit elmo sex ed

wat

eOldeGa AndDoodle.Tumblr yeoldegaganddoodle Star and Marco get the Bert and Ernie treatment... although Star would probably be more at home in Eureeka's Castie.

eOldeGa AndDoodle.Tumblr yeoldegaganddoodle Star and Marco get the Bert and Ernie treatment... although Star would probably be more at home in Eureeka's Castie.

bertstrips sesame street star vs. the forces of evil star butterfly star princess marco marco diaz bert alternative universe puppets princess star butterfly ernie

Waldorf and Statler contemplate their lives.

"That performance was terrible! Why do we keep doing this to ourselves?" "Our wives died years ago, we gotta fi in the years until death." "I know, but isn't there anything else?" "I heard a new Waffle House opened up!" "Let's go yell at the new waitresses until they cry and the managers toss us out!"

"That performance was terrible! Why do we keep doing this to ourselves?" "Our wives died years ago, we gotta fi in the years until death." "I know, but isn't there anything else?" "I heard a new Waffle House opened up!" "Let's go yell at the new waitresses until they cry and the managers toss us out!"

statler and waldorf the muppet show bertstrips

Grover demonstrates

ESAME STREET Grover demonstrates how far the law requires him to stay away from children.

ESAME STREET Grover demonstrates how far the law requires him to stay away from children.

sesame street grover

Another Stephen King Novel....

SES The wells look in horror as they run over another unintended vicim,the řather now knowing hat the old Chinese usedcarsalesman was not joking when he stated This car is possessed by the spirit ofa mad street racer."

SES The wells look in horror as they run over another unintended vicim,the řather now knowing hat the old Chinese usedcarsalesman was not joking when he stated This car is possessed by the spirit ofa mad street racer."

sesame street bertstrips christine killer car old chinese used car salesman