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He didn't notice the missing piece of his head until a local hooker accidentally groped his brain.

SESAME STREET It has been six days since Big Bird injected black tar heroin directly into his right eyeball. Finally fully conscious, he finds himself in Baghdad, Iraq with nothing but a used hypodermic needle and a Sesame Street sign He doubts the needle is even his.

SESAME STREET It has been six days since Big Bird injected black tar heroin directly into his right eyeball. Finally fully conscious, he finds himself in Baghdad, Iraq with nothing but a used hypodermic needle and a Sesame Street sign He doubts the needle is even his.

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So that's why he never smiles a lot.

Joan, Ernie, and some hobo, all laugh at the sight of Bert's micropenis

Joan, Ernie, and some hobo, all laugh at the sight of Bert's micropenis

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Go Speed Murder Gooo!!!

SESAME STREET Elmo cheers as the bomb he placed in Jeff Gordon's motor activates, causing a ear-bleeding loud explosion, causing the car to go up in flames as other racers end up crashing into the flaming wreckage.

SESAME STREET Elmo cheers as the bomb he placed in Jeff Gordon's motor activates, causing a ear-bleeding loud explosion, causing the car to go up in flames as other racers end up crashing into the flaming wreckage.

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Kermitabalism

By the time Kermit had wrenched the bottle of cyanide away from his son's lips it was too late, his own son having accidentally fallen victim to the same poison Kermit had given to so many other children. Kermit stared down at the child's body with a clinical eye and considered his options. Of course the death of his own son was regrettable, but after murdering and cannibalizing so many strangers' children, it would be downright hypocritical to let his offspring's flesh go to waste.

By the time Kermit had wrenched the bottle of cyanide away from his son's lips it was too late, his own son having accidentally fallen victim to the same poison Kermit had given to so many other children. Kermit stared down at the child's body with a clinical eye and considered his options. Of course the death of his own son was regrettable, but after murdering and cannibalizing so many strangers' children, it would be downright hypocritical to let his offspring's flesh go to waste.

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Fist

Piggy bites her tounge as her submissive speaks out of turn. Kermit's anus will bear the brunt of her fist tonight.

Piggy bites her tounge as her submissive speaks out of turn. Kermit's anus will bear the brunt of her fist tonight.

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That's some weird fetish.

Kermit can only scream as Miss Piggy proceeds to viciously sodomize him on stage.

Kermit can only scream as Miss Piggy proceeds to viciously sodomize him on stage.

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Big Bird forces Snuffy to fight his daughter to death for entertainment of the crowd and a share of money from bets.

Big Bird forces Snuffy to fight his daughter to death for entertainment of the crowd and a share of money from bets.

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Bert proceeds to show Ernie all the f---- he will give this month

Bert proceeds to show Ernie all the f---- he will give this month

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After hacking into Clinton's email, Elmo has seen more than he ever needed to know.

After hacking into Clinton's email, Elmo has seen more than he ever needed to know.

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Big Bird can't find a body he put aside here just a few minutes ago

Big Bird can't find a body he put aside here just a few minutes ago

And then there was trouble...

The brakes on Cookie monster's locomotive fail as they plow through the stationmaster's house, his fireman tries to explain what had happened as Cookie Monster is frightened of what Sir Topham Hatt would say once he got here. This accident was the third this month, not counting plowing down a school bus at a level crossing and not noticing a broken coupling as half of his consist rolled downhill, derailed and destroyed an entire farm.

The brakes on Cookie monster's locomotive fail as they plow through the stationmaster's house, his fireman tries to explain what had happened as Cookie Monster is frightened of what Sir Topham Hatt would say once he got here. This accident was the third this month, not counting plowing down a school bus at a level crossing and not noticing a broken coupling as half of his consist rolled downhill, derailed and destroyed an entire farm.

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Cookie Monster's Steam-Driver Journey

Cookie Monster happily enjoys his new job as a locomotive wagons of Kosher cargo to Auschwitz concentration camp

Cookie Monster happily enjoys his new job as a locomotive wagons of Kosher cargo to Auschwitz concentration camp

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After years of worshipping Satan, Telly was granted the telekinetic power of making his furry d--- float.

After years of worshipping Satan, Telly was granted the telekinetic power of making his furry d--- float.

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鬯a Golden Supen Shape Book CTW SESAME STREET Going Places Cookie Monster derails the locomotive and rams it into the orphanage.

鬯a Golden Supen Shape Book CTW SESAME STREET Going Places Cookie Monster derails the locomotive and rams it into the orphanage.

cookie monster train

Snuffed Dead

25 While desperately searching for the bag of cocaine Big Bird had stolen and hidden away from him, Snuffy unwittingly stuck his trunk in a booby-trapped shredder, which started sucking his face in, tearing away all the flesh it could.

25 While desperately searching for the bag of cocaine Big Bird had stolen and hidden away from him, Snuffy unwittingly stuck his trunk in a booby-trapped shredder, which started sucking his face in, tearing away all the flesh it could.

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He dies doing what he loved.

Kermit goes for the ride of a lifetime after strapping his dildo to a paint shaker.

Kermit goes for the ride of a lifetime after strapping his dildo to a paint shaker.

kermit dildo paint shaker

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Kayla punches Ernie in the solar plexus, which gives her enough time to escape the molesting maniac.

Kayla punches Ernie in the solar plexus, which gives her enough time to escape the molesting maniac.

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Snuffleupagus excuses himselfi from the group to smoke a massive doobie. He had been dealing with addiction for years, and he finally let himself go that fateful day. The Sesame police found him hours later, wandering the highway repeating "Bird...Big Bird...Bird..." Then his brain shut down for the final time

Snuffleupagus excuses himselfi from the group to smoke a massive doobie. He had been dealing with addiction for years, and he finally let himself go that fateful day. The Sesame police found him hours later, wandering the highway repeating "Bird...Big Bird...Bird..." Then his brain shut down for the final time

smoking snuffaluffagus

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Snuffy realizes the bath isn't filled with ice cream

Snuffy realizes the bath isn't filled with ice cream

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Bert should go with [REDACTED] instead.

Ernie tries to convince Bert it's okay to feed the D-Class to other D-Class.

Ernie tries to convince Bert it's okay to feed the D-Class to other D-Class.

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