Bertstrips - Images

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Sweet Dreams

SESAME STREET Elmo dreams about seeiną Bert naked

SESAME STREET Elmo dreams about seeiną Bert naked

"Sorry, Bert. I lost track after 8,243,721."

Ernie counts how many times he threw Bort off the roof

Ernie counts how many times he threw Bort off the roof

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The next week Ernie's parents are found dead...

Bert finds his parents' names in the obituaries. Ernie smiles.

Bert finds his parents' names in the obituaries. Ernie smiles.

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Bertstrips: Green Hell

SESAME STREET Cookie monster swears vengeance on the witch doctor who put the curse on him that turned every thing he touches into vegetables

SESAME STREET Cookie monster swears vengeance on the witch doctor who put the curse on him that turned every thing he touches into vegetables

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The Caves of Andro-Fozzie

As he prepared for death, Fozzie heard the voices of all his friends. Each one imploring him not to commit suicide. "Don't leave us, funny man." Begged Dr. Teeth. "Keep on living, dog." Pleaded Ralph. "We all love you, Fozzie." Said Miss Piggy. "You should swing by my place." Suggested Scooter. "I mean, if you're going to die anyway, can you at least let me try out a few things on you first? l've got this neat idea for molten salt and I could use someone to practice on."

As he prepared for death, Fozzie heard the voices of all his friends. Each one imploring him not to commit suicide. "Don't leave us, funny man." Begged Dr. Teeth. "Keep on living, dog." Pleaded Ralph. "We all love you, Fozzie." Said Miss Piggy. "You should swing by my place." Suggested Scooter. "I mean, if you're going to die anyway, can you at least let me try out a few things on you first? l've got this neat idea for molten salt and I could use someone to practice on."

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"What happened to Mr. Puff?"

Ernie gazed at his beautiful creation. "I was right, Bert. Ernie said. "Bort's body did make a good chandelier."

Ernie gazed at his beautiful creation. "I was right, Bert. Ernie said. "Bort's body did make a good chandelier."

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Bertstrips: This is Why Kids Don't Eat their Vegetables

1 SESAME STREET Elmo sits completely still to avoid drawing the attention of the Green Giant, who has the intent of violating Elmo

1 SESAME STREET Elmo sits completely still to avoid drawing the attention of the Green Giant, who has the intent of violating Elmo

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Ernie's been in there at least 3 hours...

Bert wants his turn with the prostitute.

Bert wants his turn with the prostitute.

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He thought Bert was using that P-90X program he got for Christmas back in '09.

Ernie finds who took all of his steroids.

Ernie finds who took all of his steroids.

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Taxidermy.

Ernie's new hobby of abortion taxidermy receives high praise

Ernie's new hobby of abortion taxidermy receives high praise

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Ernie's been reading erotic fan fiction.

Bert wakes uptothe sound of Ernie having an orgasm

Bert wakes uptothe sound of Ernie having an orgasm

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Welcome to Hell.

"Your incessant and sinful murder of my kind has not gone unnoticed," Threatened Satan as Cookie Monster entered the gates of Hell.

"Your incessant and sinful murder of my kind has not gone unnoticed," Threatened Satan as Cookie Monster entered the gates of Hell.

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Jenny McCarthy

SESAME STREET Jenny McCarthy preaches the dangers of vaccination to Elmo, who now believes he has autism

SESAME STREET Jenny McCarthy preaches the dangers of vaccination to Elmo, who now believes he has autism

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Bertstrips: Cry the Rainbow; Taste the Rainbow

Bert comes home dejected after an unsuccessful day at the playground. " Maybe you should've used Snickers like I told you to use. Instead of those dumbass Skittles." Ernie said.

Bert comes home dejected after an unsuccessful day at the playground. " Maybe you should've used Snickers like I told you to use. Instead of those dumbass Skittles." Ernie said.

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Sacrifice! Sacrifice!

Snuffy and Big Bird gather the sacrifice

Snuffy and Big Bird gather the sacrifice

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Bertstrips: God Hates "Frags"

After joining the Westboro Baptist Church, Kermit hijacks the microphone at the funeral of a dead Marine.

After joining the Westboro Baptist Church, Kermit hijacks the microphone at the funeral of a dead Marine.

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Grover experiments with food.

Grover learned that drinking pineapple juce did not change the taste of his semen.

Grover learned that drinking pineapple juce did not change the taste of his semen.

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Barney died in the name of science that day.

Professor Grouch was horrified to find that the volunteers for the shrinlk ray experiment had been eaten from the inside out by ferocious parasites.

Professor Grouch was horrified to find that the volunteers for the shrinlk ray experiment had been eaten from the inside out by ferocious parasites.

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Satan would be proud.

Ernie&Bert just heard on the radio that someone else was convicted for the series of murders and rapes they commited last month.

Ernie&Bert just heard on the radio that someone else was convicted for the series of murders and rapes they commited last month.

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They're having the time of their lives!

Kermit, Figgy, and Fozzie have the time of their lives running over pedestrians.

Kermit, Figgy, and Fozzie have the time of their lives running over pedestrians.

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