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Really Needed That

Ray Thanks for the clarification, Dad. I with Raylin I Joe 7 mins t Happy 21st Birthday to my beautiful daughter (left) Raylin! mesdison C

Ray Thanks for the clarification, Dad. I with Raylin I Joe 7 mins t Happy 21st Birthday to my beautiful daughter (left) Raylin! mesdison C

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Sounds Nice Honestly

IG: clarkebetz @dovenymph There is literally no rule that says you have to get married and start a family. Normalize splitting a mansion with your 5 best friends and 10 dogs.

IG: clarkebetz @dovenymph There is literally no rule that says you have to get married and start a family. Normalize splitting a mansion with your 5 best friends and 10 dogs.

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That's Life

Kevin The Dad @kevinthedad I brought my son home from kindergarten and he asked "is it the weekend yet?" Nope. It's Monday. You'll get used to this feeling kiddo.

Kevin The Dad @kevinthedad I brought my son home from kindergarten and he asked "is it the weekend yet?" Nope. It's Monday. You'll get used to this feeling kiddo.

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Technically He Can

i am so tired 11:32 kelsey @spinachluvr 306 Dad > 5GE can you talk real quick Delivered Not like an auctioneer but I can talk faster than normal if I try really hard.

i am so tired 11:32 kelsey @spinachluvr 306 Dad > 5GE can you talk real quick Delivered Not like an auctioneer but I can talk faster than normal if I try really hard.

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Geez...

Suz @OhhhhSuzanna Are you actually "low maintenance" or did you just internalize at a young age that the less resources, attention and energy you require, the more lovable you are? So you take the least amount space possible??? Because you think you're unlovable if you express desires or needs??? 9:56 AM 26 Dec 22 from Florida, USA

Suz @OhhhhSuzanna Are you actually "low maintenance" or did you just internalize at a young age that the less resources, attention and energy you require, the more lovable you are? So you take the least amount space possible??? Because you think you're unlovable if you express desires or needs??? 9:56 AM 26 Dec 22 from Florida, USA

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Crying Inside

*total is $11, gives cashier $20 Cashier: Do you have an additional $1 so l can give you $10? Me: HOUSE. DRAGON MEMES

*total is $11, gives cashier $20 Cashier: Do you have an additional $1 so l can give you $10? Me: HOUSE. DRAGON MEMES

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Works Every Time

@Kanye868 How do you politely tell your visitor that it's time to go home? If you're from the midwest, you just say "welp" really forcefully and slap your knees with your hands, then stand up. Other midwesterners will recognize the signal and say "spose we should head out" 1h Like Reply 29

@Kanye868 How do you politely tell your visitor that it's time to go home? If you're from the midwest, you just say "welp" really forcefully and slap your knees with your hands, then stand up. Other midwesterners will recognize the signal and say "spose we should head out" 1h Like Reply 29

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That's Awkward

elsie @activesandal Gyno: what's your tattoo say Me: it's nothing don't even worry about it Gyno: "if... you can- Me: fine it says "if you can read it you can eat it" I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry

elsie @activesandal Gyno: what's your tattoo say Me: it's nothing don't even worry about it Gyno: "if... you can- Me: fine it says "if you can read it you can eat it" I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry

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Ouch

you're really funny lol I wish hot guys could have your sense of humor

you're really funny lol I wish hot guys could have your sense of humor

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That's Rough

D D Dad Don't bring up your sister's feet career during Christmas dinner now Dad She's making more than you with your masters degree. She's our favorite now now

D D Dad Don't bring up your sister's feet career during Christmas dinner now Dad She's making more than you with your masters degree. She's our favorite now now

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Yes

azula @erryone do you ever pretend like you didn't see something so the other person doesn't feel embarrassed 8/5/18, 7:39 PM 72K Retweets 236K Likes 27

azula @erryone do you ever pretend like you didn't see something so the other person doesn't feel embarrassed 8/5/18, 7:39 PM 72K Retweets 236K Likes 27

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Unbelievable

Dumpster @bolanlikes2rock A parking space in downtown Toronto makes $27/hr. I, a real person with thoughts and feelings, capable of suffering, makes less than a godd parking space. 4:31 PM Feb 25, 2022 10.5K Retweets 385 Quotes 711 Bookmarks 83.8K Likes

Dumpster @bolanlikes2rock A parking space in downtown Toronto makes $27/hr. I, a real person with thoughts and feelings, capable of suffering, makes less than a godd parking space. 4:31 PM Feb 25, 2022 10.5K Retweets 385 Quotes 711 Bookmarks 83.8K Likes

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Risking It All

2015- 2nd yr. Rookie police officer 26 @Crowned Prince___ 2020-6th yr. Detective/CID av 7 I sell drugs at 7426 Main Street Apt 4E

2015- 2nd yr. Rookie police officer 26 @Crowned Prince___ 2020-6th yr. Detective/CID av 7 I sell drugs at 7426 Main Street Apt 4E

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Sharing Is Caring

Bib can y'all just post your therapist's advice in the comments so i don't have to go

Bib can y'all just post your therapist's advice in the comments so i don't have to go

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Consequences

Driving to work every day at 5am because I wanted to be funny in high school. (CRYING) MUSTER POINT MEMES SCHILDON 11

Driving to work every day at 5am because I wanted to be funny in high school. (CRYING) MUSTER POINT MEMES SCHILDON 11

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What a Guy

We need more of these people My coworker is so unaware of modern cultural discourse it's hilarious He's 23. He doesn't use TikTok, Instagram, or Twitter. His favourite drink is Bud Light and was confused when an old dude at work asked him why he still supports them. He's dating a 20 year old college junior which isn't much of an age gap to most people but you already know that bothers a very loud subsection of the population. He saw someone wearing a sweater that says "From the River to the Sea" and asked which ocean the sweater was referring to; he's a huge cartography nerd. When he saw a manager put he/him pronouns in a sent email, he was confused and asked me "what does that mean? I thought he was already a man?". We had a bit of a coworker get together one day and played drunk truth or dare. Someone asked him what is body count was. His response was "I played MW3 a lot when I was 10 so it's definitely somewhere in the hundreds" Never change Alex. Love you man

We need more of these people My coworker is so unaware of modern cultural discourse it's hilarious He's 23. He doesn't use TikTok, Instagram, or Twitter. His favourite drink is Bud Light and was confused when an old dude at work asked him why he still supports them. He's dating a 20 year old college junior which isn't much of an age gap to most people but you already know that bothers a very loud subsection of the population. He saw someone wearing a sweater that says "From the River to the Sea" and asked which ocean the sweater was referring to; he's a huge cartography nerd. When he saw a manager put he/him pronouns in a sent email, he was confused and asked me "what does that mean? I thought he was already a man?". We had a bit of a coworker get together one day and played drunk truth or dare. Someone asked him what is body count was. His response was "I played MW3 a lot when I was 10 so it's definitely somewhere in the hundreds" Never change Alex. Love you man

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