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Thanks Mom

linc @lincnotfound 8:23am: *calls mom, no answer* 8:57am: *calls mom, no answer* 9:12am: *calls mom, no answer* 9:26am: *calls mom, no answer* 9:27am: *takes a shower* 9:33am: *27 missed calls from mom* 9:34am: *calls mom, no answer*

linc @lincnotfound 8:23am: *calls mom, no answer* 8:57am: *calls mom, no answer* 9:12am: *calls mom, no answer* 9:26am: *calls mom, no answer* 9:27am: *takes a shower* 9:33am: *27 missed calls from mom* 9:34am: *calls mom, no answer*

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Missed Opportunity

mo @classically The fact that Head and Shoulders doesn't have a body wash called Knees and Toes disappoints me almost as much as I disappoint my parents.

mo @classically The fact that Head and Shoulders doesn't have a body wash called Knees and Toes disappoints me almost as much as I disappoint my parents.

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Explains a Lot

aly i just found out that people who suffer from anxiety tend to rewatch the same tv shows all over again because we already know what's going to happen next therefore it creates a sense of safety/comfort and that's the reason why we keep rewatching them

aly i just found out that people who suffer from anxiety tend to rewatch the same tv shows all over again because we already know what's going to happen next therefore it creates a sense of safety/comfort and that's the reason why we keep rewatching them

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Cancelled Plans

When you are trying to get dressed to go out but none of your clothes fit anymore Welp, plans are cancelled, l'm fat

When you are trying to get dressed to go out but none of your clothes fit anymore Welp, plans are cancelled, l'm fat

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Wish I'd Thought of This

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Sponsored Videos

Content Creator: Before we get into today's video, I just want to mention this video's sponsor- Me: 10 10 10 10

Content Creator: Before we get into today's video, I just want to mention this video's sponsor- Me: 10 10 10 10

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Is It Silent Enough?

Movie theater: Please silence your phones. Me, who hasn't taken my phone off silent since 2012: *double-checks*

Movie theater: Please silence your phones. Me, who hasn't taken my phone off silent since 2012: *double-checks*

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Why Does Sleeping Hurt

Devin @papasuncle Me: [finally gets eight hours of sleep] My neck: yeah but u did it wrong lol 1:38 PM · 2020-09-13 · Twitter for iPhone 601 Retweets 11 Quote Tweets 3,884 Likes

Devin @papasuncle Me: [finally gets eight hours of sleep] My neck: yeah but u did it wrong lol 1:38 PM · 2020-09-13 · Twitter for iPhone 601 Retweets 11 Quote Tweets 3,884 Likes

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Winning Therapy

Shayne Smith @Shaydozer Yesterday I explained something so bleak to my therapist she asked me if we could pause for a minute so she could think about it. I'm getting close to winning therapy I can feel it in my bones. 950 likes

Shayne Smith @Shaydozer Yesterday I explained something so bleak to my therapist she asked me if we could pause for a minute so she could think about it. I'm getting close to winning therapy I can feel it in my bones. 950 likes

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The Past Two Years in a Nutshell

Tom Cashman @_tomcashman Somehow we ended up here Having to Aроcalypse go to work ...

Tom Cashman @_tomcashman Somehow we ended up here Having to Aроcalypse go to work ...

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Zoned Out

Me reaching the end of the page but realizing I was daydreaming and didn't actually read it

Me reaching the end of the page but realizing I was daydreaming and didn't actually read it

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Good Point

Re If king hate grocery store check out screens asking me if I want to donate $20 to end child hunger or whatever. You're a $10 billion corporation. I'm using a coupon to get 50 cents off a bag of potatos. Why don't YOU donate $20 to end child hunger >

Re If king hate grocery store check out screens asking me if I want to donate $20 to end child hunger or whatever. You're a $10 billion corporation. I'm using a coupon to get 50 cents off a bag of potatos. Why don't YOU donate $20 to end child hunger >

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Good Luck Forgetting Embarrassment

My brain recording my good memories My brain recording my cringe memories AND

My brain recording my good memories My brain recording my cringe memories AND

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How to End a Conversation

Asif Ullah @AsifUllah22 By the time I remember to text back it's too disrepectful to even do it 12:18 PM · 2020-11-29 · Twitter for Android 11.4K Retweets 1,383 Quote Tweets 49.6K Likes

Asif Ullah @AsifUllah22 By the time I remember to text back it's too disrepectful to even do it 12:18 PM · 2020-11-29 · Twitter for Android 11.4K Retweets 1,383 Quote Tweets 49.6K Likes

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Me in Pictures

show me show me I think it's not bad, look delete it

show me show me I think it's not bad, look delete it

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Phone Calls Are the Worst

Stop giving me your toughest battles it's literally just making a phone call

Stop giving me your toughest battles it's literally just making a phone call

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