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It's not fun at all

joe @mutablejoe There should be a millenial edition of Monopoly where you just walk round the board paying rent, never able to buy anything.
joe @mutablejoe There should be a millenial edition of Monopoly where you just walk round the board paying rent, never able to buy anything.

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Go on ahead

Abby Heugel @AbbyHaslssues A woman cut in front of me at the store with a box of tampons, ice cream, and wine in her cart. I wasn't about to mess with that situation.
Abby Heugel @AbbyHaslssues A woman cut in front of me at the store with a box of tampons, ice cream, and wine in her cart. I wasn't about to mess with that situation.

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It feels like an attack

Brandy Jensen @BrandyLJensen the amount of scrolling I gotta do to find my birth year for online forms is becoming quite hurtful
Brandy Jensen @BrandyLJensen the amount of scrolling I gotta do to find my birth year for online forms is becoming quite hurtful

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I'm here for it

K Post slate @PleaseBeGneiss they should make halloween a 4-day weekend instead of thanksgiving. less time with family more time with satan 12:14 - 10/31/22 33 15.4K 38K ☐ 269 ↑
K Post slate @PleaseBeGneiss they should make halloween a 4-day weekend instead of thanksgiving. less time with family more time with satan 12:14 - 10/31/22 33 15.4K 38K ☐ 269 ↑

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They have a point

tabitha @thetolerantweft Follow going on ozempic, not to lose weight, but because the inevitable class action lawsuit is gonna pay out like crazy 8:33 AM 10/30/24 • 16M Views •
tabitha @thetolerantweft Follow going on ozempic, not to lose weight, but because the inevitable class action lawsuit is gonna pay out like crazy 8:33 AM 10/30/24 • 16M Views •

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Throwback!

party mom @fifimcfae · 6h and you used to have to wear a jacket over your halloween costume because it used to be cold in october 186 116.6K 115K ili 1.6M Σ 80
party mom @fifimcfae · 6h and you used to have to wear a jacket over your halloween costume because it used to be cold in october 186 116.6K 115K ili 1.6M Σ 80

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I do not want that, thanks though

Robert Schultz @_RobertSchultz A guy my age was telling me how happy he was that his wife just gave birth to their fourth child then was like "sorry, don't mean to brag" and it's like, oh no worries, your life literally sounds terrible to me
Robert Schultz @_RobertSchultz A guy my age was telling me how happy he was that his wife just gave birth to their fourth child then was like "sorry, don't mean to brag" and it's like, oh no worries, your life literally sounds terrible to me

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Real

Em @SleepyEm1 wine tasting is soup tasting a thing??? trying loads of soups with fresh bread??? please??? anyone else???
Em @SleepyEm1 wine tasting is soup tasting a thing??? trying loads of soups with fresh bread??? please??? anyone else???

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Straight to the point

Paddington Cinematic Unive...⠀ @NoMagRyan There's a South Korean burger bar I follow on Insta just because their slogan always makes me laugh Ballonbox billionbox.official 17 m WE BELIEVE THAT OTHER BURGERS ARE S
Paddington Cinematic Unive...⠀ @NoMagRyan There's a South Korean burger bar I follow on Insta just because their slogan always makes me laugh Ballonbox billionbox.official 17 m WE BELIEVE THAT OTHER BURGERS ARE S

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I get it

Synexdoche @amor_fatti I respect the moon's unwillingness to be photographed on a phone
Synexdoche @amor_fatti I respect the moon's unwillingness to be photographed on a phone

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That's embarrassing

> my name is no. @om_eye_goodness last year, i went on a date with a dude and when i told him i was reading Animal Farm again, he laughed obnoxiously for an entire minute and said i was too old to be reading children's books. i think about that a lot. ...i wonder if he's still an idiot.
> my name is no. @om_eye_goodness last year, i went on a date with a dude and when i told him i was reading Animal Farm again, he laughed obnoxiously for an entire minute and said i was too old to be reading children's books. i think about that a lot. ...i wonder if he's still an idiot.

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Doesn't seem efficient

David Hughes @david8hughes In all the movies, Santa never goes to the house directly next door. He always gets in his sleigh & f off like 20 miles east.
David Hughes @david8hughes In all the movies, Santa never goes to the house directly next door. He always gets in his sleigh & f off like 20 miles east.

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What is this...

Just got married. Homosexuality was a phase. Anna Khachiyan 1,104 1666 23.4K ili 2.2M ↑ Robert F. Kennedy Jr @RobertK.... 22m She is a beautiful angel, Tim. Easy to see how she ungayed you.
Just got married. Homosexuality was a phase. Anna Khachiyan 1,104 1666 23.4K ili 2.2M ↑ Robert F. Kennedy Jr @RobertK.... 22m She is a beautiful angel, Tim. Easy to see how she ungayed you.

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He did not say that

@wiiudisks 19h “ག who tf says "I outrank you in this scenario" Lizardy @Lizard_yyy. 19h bowser did NOT say that THAT'S A MA'GIRL! THANK YOU, MARIO! I OUTRANK YOU, IN THIS SCENARIO! TE4M ZERO 333 ↑ 2.6K 77K ılı 1.9M SS
@wiiudisks 19h “ག who tf says "I outrank you in this scenario" Lizardy @Lizard_yyy. 19h bowser did NOT say that THAT'S A MA'GIRL! THANK YOU, MARIO! I OUTRANK YOU, IN THIS SCENARIO! TE4M ZERO 333 ↑ 2.6K 77K ılı 1.9M SS

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The duality of man

The Traditional Life @The_Trad_Life 22h finking safeway was out of cool ranch AGAIN for the second night in a row so SICK OF THIS S 1 272 51 The Traditional Life @The_Trad_Life - 23h The heart of a True Man will always yearn for a return to simplicity. Q7 175 103
The Traditional Life @The_Trad_Life 22h finking safeway was out of cool ranch AGAIN for the second night in a row so SICK OF THIS S 1 272 51 The Traditional Life @The_Trad_Life - 23h The heart of a True Man will always yearn for a return to simplicity. Q7 175 103

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Side plate

hev @Heathernab Asked my mum and dad why there was a frisbee in the dishwasher and it turns out that for months they've thought it was a "side plate"???
hev @Heathernab Asked my mum and dad why there was a frisbee in the dishwasher and it turns out that for months they've thought it was a "side plate"???

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