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Glad you asked

stephanie @isosteph *** why did i study computer science? well i have a dream of becoming a white tech guy's 3rd consecutive asian girlfriend and smiling quietly on his arm at san francisco parties while he pretends his yellow fever is actually an interest in japanese urbanism
stephanie @isosteph *** why did i study computer science? well i have a dream of becoming a white tech guy's 3rd consecutive asian girlfriend and smiling quietly on his arm at san francisco parties while he pretends his yellow fever is actually an interest in japanese urbanism

Twitter / X
oddly specific /r/oddlyspecific specific suspiciously specific

No owl talk

Dani Lyle @Danika_Lyle if I could give any advice to my 8 year old self? stop talking abt how much u like owls all the time. Ur about to get worthless owl things for every holiday until ur 20. Start talking about how much u like cold hard cash. 10:07 AM - 8/10/20 Twitter for iPhone
Dani Lyle @Danika_Lyle if I could give any advice to my 8 year old self? stop talking abt how much u like owls all the time. Ur about to get worthless owl things for every holiday until ur 20. Start talking about how much u like cold hard cash. 10:07 AM - 8/10/20 Twitter for iPhone

Twitter / X
oddly specific /r/oddlyspecific specific suspiciously specific

"MAGA is turning on each other, and it is a spectacular sight."

Laura Loomer @LauraLoo....2h To those of you getting messages saying that I deactivated my X subscriptions, that's a lie. ☑ I didn't. @elonmusk took away my premium account tonight, limited my character limit, & canceled my subscriptions because I spoke out about mass migration. It's retaliatory censorship. All Verified Mentions X @LauraLoomer has deactivated Subscriptions. At the next renewal date, your Subscription will be canceled and you'll no longer be charged the monthly fee. Laura Loomer @LauraLoo....3h Verified mer has deactivated newal date, your Sul nd you'll no longer b BREAKING: 550 17851 ♡ 2,5K Il 165K ☐
Laura Loomer @LauraLoo....2h To those of you getting messages saying that I deactivated my X subscriptions, that's a lie. ☑ I didn't. @elonmusk took away my premium account tonight, limited my character limit, & canceled my subscriptions because I spoke out about mass migration. It's retaliatory censorship. All Verified Mentions X @LauraLoomer has deactivated Subscriptions. At the next renewal date, your Subscription will be canceled and you'll no longer be charged the monthly fee. Laura Loomer @LauraLoo....3h Verified mer has deactivated newal date, your Sul nd you'll no longer b BREAKING: 550 17851 ♡ 2,5K Il 165K ☐

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elon musk laura loomer deplatforming censorship

Silence, phone

YEAH SLIM!! @SlimWyldNReklez So y'all telling me yall don't talk to at least 15 people a day? Close friends, family, and xyz??? @fjaystaytrill If 15 people talk to me in one day I'll cut my phone off
YEAH SLIM!! @SlimWyldNReklez So y'all telling me yall don't talk to at least 15 people a day? Close friends, family, and xyz??? @fjaystaytrill If 15 people talk to me in one day I'll cut my phone off

Twitter / X
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Do nothing

Eugene Lee Yang @EugeneLeeYang These 6 days between Christmas and New Year's is the only time of year you should strive to do absolutely f nothing. Make zero progress. Take all the time off. Go on vacation from your vacation. Be the least impressive version of yourself. Transform into a couch. 800
Eugene Lee Yang @EugeneLeeYang These 6 days between Christmas and New Year's is the only time of year you should strive to do absolutely f nothing. Make zero progress. Take all the time off. Go on vacation from your vacation. Be the least impressive version of yourself. Transform into a couch. 800

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I get it

frewad @Fredward3948576 Follow I heard my toast spring up in the kitchen like 15 minutes ago but I don't care. I just don't care. A that piece of toast. And f my life 6:51PM - 8/31/24 4.7M Views 24K Reposts 971 Quotes
frewad @Fredward3948576 Follow I heard my toast spring up in the kitchen like 15 minutes ago but I don't care. I just don't care. A that piece of toast. And f my life 6:51PM - 8/31/24 4.7M Views 24K Reposts 971 Quotes

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Quite literally the worst

Uncle Ari @Maze DaMouth I have never come back from any holiday feeling relaxed, refreshed & reinvigorated to get back into work. I come back with the taste of freedom, still fresh in my mouth, a renewed hatred for work, and a strong suspicion that this is not what I should be spending my life doing.
Uncle Ari @Maze DaMouth I have never come back from any holiday feeling relaxed, refreshed & reinvigorated to get back into work. I come back with the taste of freedom, still fresh in my mouth, a renewed hatred for work, and a strong suspicion that this is not what I should be spending my life doing.

Twitter / X
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Like he didn't know...

هدى @sumerianbby i remember when i was 6, i got ahold of my dad's ID & it had an expiration date. spent 3 hours crying because I thought that he was set to die on that date. he asked me why i was crying and i didn't tell him bcuz i was scared he was gonna cry as well
هدى @sumerianbby i remember when i was 6, i got ahold of my dad's ID & it had an expiration date. spent 3 hours crying because I thought that he was set to die on that date. he asked me why i was crying and i didn't tell him bcuz i was scared he was gonna cry as well

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Who asked?

Donovan @cxcope Nobody: Absolutely no one: Not a single soul on this Earth: Not even their mom: iNfLuEnCeR: "A lot of you have asked about my skin care routine..."
Donovan @cxcope Nobody: Absolutely no one: Not a single soul on this Earth: Not even their mom: iNfLuEnCeR: "A lot of you have asked about my skin care routine..."

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Whenever that might be

T. @thomxs14 What's a good age to have kids? tee @neiciebynature Financially stable years old.
T. @thomxs14 What's a good age to have kids? tee @neiciebynature Financially stable years old.

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Sorry, folks

JOSH ⚫⚫ @THEJOSHSOFAR do you ever have a conversation in your head and you actually pull a facial expression that would fit the conversation but then you realize how weird it must look to someone who doesn't know you're acting out a whole scenario in your head
JOSH ⚫⚫ @THEJOSHSOFAR do you ever have a conversation in your head and you actually pull a facial expression that would fit the conversation but then you realize how weird it must look to someone who doesn't know you're acting out a whole scenario in your head

Twitter / X
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Why do they even bother?

Kan.Pos @kan_pos No one lies more than a mom that says "we'll see" cause we ain't about to see nothin.
Kan.Pos @kan_pos No one lies more than a mom that says "we'll see" cause we ain't about to see nothin.

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They don't care at all

Mat @matchu_chutrain Instead of asking your boyfriends if you look fat just ask your grandparents. They'll tell you the truth without any hesitation
Mat @matchu_chutrain Instead of asking your boyfriends if you look fat just ask your grandparents. They'll tell you the truth without any hesitation

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I am so annoyed

yyy @yx3io just accidentally closed a tab i've had been meaning to read for the past 2 years
yyy @yx3io just accidentally closed a tab i've had been meaning to read for the past 2 years

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Why is it so stressful?

anthony @xforcades2 eye doctor: "one.. *switches lens* or two? choose which is better... one.. *switches lens again* or two" me: *sweats nervously*
anthony @xforcades2 eye doctor: "one.. *switches lens* or two? choose which is better... one.. *switches lens again* or two" me: *sweats nervously*

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Got 'em!

*brushes teeth for twelve minutes before the dentist* yes. that'll show them
*brushes teeth for twelve minutes before the dentist* yes. that'll show them

Twitter / X
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Get me out of here

Michael Carusi @MichaelCarusi The three stages of career development: 1. I can't wait until I'm important enough to be included in meetings. 2. I feel so important being in these meetings! 3. I will do anything legal and several illegal things to avoid these meetings.
Michael Carusi @MichaelCarusi The three stages of career development: 1. I can't wait until I'm important enough to be included in meetings. 2. I feel so important being in these meetings! 3. I will do anything legal and several illegal things to avoid these meetings.

Twitter / X
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The general public is crazy

leo @LeonardCowalski Everyone who works in customer service should legally be allowed to fight one customer a year. First to Review 1/4/2019 As a last minute resort Me and my sister went to this subway to get 63 footlong subs for my grandsons Confirmation party and had to wait for over an hour for the subs! Ridiculously long wait and the lady who took my order seemed really annoyed with me.
leo @LeonardCowalski Everyone who works in customer service should legally be allowed to fight one customer a year. First to Review 1/4/2019 As a last minute resort Me and my sister went to this subway to get 63 footlong subs for my grandsons Confirmation party and had to wait for over an hour for the subs! Ridiculously long wait and the lady who took my order seemed really annoyed with me.

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It's kind of a lot

I'M THAT GIRL + @_Oh_Bee What level of adulting have you reached?? Melanie Dione @thegatesofmel “Why is there so much sugar in everything?”
I'M THAT GIRL + @_Oh_Bee What level of adulting have you reached?? Melanie Dione @thegatesofmel “Why is there so much sugar in everything?”

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Two different nights

rudy mustang @rudy_mustang Me: the eagles won last night Co worker: oh did you watch the game Me: *covered in blood and scratches* what game
rudy mustang @rudy_mustang Me: the eagles won last night Co worker: oh did you watch the game Me: *covered in blood and scratches* what game

Twitter / X
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