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Niall Gorey @NiallGorey_ COVID-19 COMPLIANCE OFFICER Please Stand Here
Niall Gorey @NiallGorey_ COVID-19 COMPLIANCE OFFICER Please Stand Here

Twitter / X
covid meme social distance funny tweet

ham baby

PROTECT BLACK WOMEN @MrsMYLF My son fell asleep on my textured robe & now he looks like a honey glazed ham. appy Addy
PROTECT BLACK WOMEN @MrsMYLF My son fell asleep on my textured robe & now he looks like a honey glazed ham. appy Addy

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honey funny tweet funny pic

true love

a lesbian's lesbian @mitraskoura so amazing how my parents found each other even though they were from opposite ends of the eyebrow spectrum
a lesbian's lesbian @mitraskoura so amazing how my parents found each other even though they were from opposite ends of the eyebrow spectrum

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eyebrows parents funny

good times

sarah slothanova @slothanova At least during the 1918 pandemic they had cocaine in their soda
sarah slothanova @slothanova At least during the 1918 pandemic they had cocaine in their soda

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cocaine pandemic funny tweet

cooking alone

Gabby @bria_simone21 No one: Me alone in the kitchen: Okay guys so now I'm going to preheat my oven to 350
Gabby @bria_simone21 No one: Me alone in the kitchen: Okay guys so now I'm going to preheat my oven to 350

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cooking funny tweet

when I needed an angel

#1 samir @samir hey I released a blank song that will play 1st so that *one* song won't play every time u plug ur phone into ur car have A a a a a Very Good Song (Silent Track) - Single by Samir Mezrahi a wonderful music.apple.com day 1:53 PM · 8/9/17 · Twitter for iPhone
#1 samir @samir hey I released a blank song that will play 1st so that *one* song won't play every time u plug ur phone into ur car have A a a a a Very Good Song (Silent Track) - Single by Samir Mezrahi a wonderful music.apple.com day 1:53 PM · 8/9/17 · Twitter for iPhone

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funny tweet music

charlotte's web

Michael Jimenez @mikeets14 My 9yr old's first book review, I guess Charlotte's Web De pressing don't read.
Michael Jimenez @mikeets14 My 9yr old's first book review, I guess Charlotte's Web De pressing don't read.

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book funny kids

let them in!

Sam Davidson @sdwaco who is this sign for No Geese
Sam Davidson @sdwaco who is this sign for No Geese

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geese animals funny meme

matchy matchy

ki ht @ki_eeks Dad.. whyyyyy Q El Jenoizasto19 2
ki ht @ki_eeks Dad.. whyyyyy Q El Jenoizasto19 2

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funny mask funny dad dad joke tie

Employee of the month

dustin Couch @Dustinkcouch customer: can we get a plate of french fries for the table? me: (first day as a waiter) ahh i don't think we're allowed to feed the tables boss: can i talk to u for a sec me: what's up boss: ur doing a great job. i want those tables to starve.
dustin Couch @Dustinkcouch customer: can we get a plate of french fries for the table? me: (first day as a waiter) ahh i don't think we're allowed to feed the tables boss: can i talk to u for a sec me: what's up boss: ur doing a great job. i want those tables to starve.

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funny tweet restaurant starve the tables

someone help her

tott @crazytott · 1d A cop just knocked on my door and told me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes???? W--??? My dogs don't even own bikes tf 653 t7 61.3K 641K Yudith @yudswelch Replying to @crazytott Meaning your dogs were chasing people "who were on bikes" 2:44 · 06 Oct 20 · Twitter for iPhone
tott @crazytott · 1d A cop just knocked on my door and told me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes???? W--??? My dogs don't even own bikes tf 653 t7 61.3K 641K Yudith @yudswelch Replying to @crazytott Meaning your dogs were chasing people "who were on bikes" 2:44 · 06 Oct 20 · Twitter for iPhone

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dogs cops chase bike funny tweet

Soul Trailer

Diego Attanasio @DiegoComedy I was watching Pixar's Soul with my 5-year-old nephew and when they got to the part with the unborn souls in the "great before" he said, "I remember that place." All the adults just gasped and said, "what?!" And he said, "yeah, they showed it in the trailer."
Diego Attanasio @DiegoComedy I was watching Pixar's Soul with my 5-year-old nephew and when they got to the part with the unborn souls in the "great before" he said, "I remember that place." All the adults just gasped and said, "what?!" And he said, "yeah, they showed it in the trailer."

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pixar soul great before trailer

Good Job I Guess

MIT scientists created a "psychopath" Al by feeding it violent content from Reddit trib.al/rfuY5Ci I GLIDE LIKE OVECHKIN @galacticdad hey quick question: what the f---
MIT scientists created a "psychopath" Al by feeding it violent content from Reddit trib.al/rfuY5Ci I GLIDE LIKE OVECHKIN @galacticdad hey quick question: what the f---

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quick question mit science ai psychopath reddit content machine learning algorithm

Stripping vs Military

guys joining the military is the male equivalent of "f--- this s--- im gonna be a stripper" 8:06 PM 12/30/19 from Lubbock, TX Twitter for iPhone 47.2K Retweets 238K Likes xpx @vicodinchild 2d Replying to @97Vercetti yeah but one is a noble career, which takes a lot of bravery and courage, and the other is the military O 26 271,035 O 11.7K
guys joining the military is the male equivalent of "f--- this s--- im gonna be a stripper" 8:06 PM 12/30/19 from Lubbock, TX Twitter for iPhone 47.2K Retweets 238K Likes xpx @vicodinchild 2d Replying to @97Vercetti yeah but one is a noble career, which takes a lot of bravery and courage, and the other is the military O 26 271,035 O 11.7K

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stripper military noble career bravery

Disguise

NEW YORK POST New York Post O @nypost · 2d Forget fake IDs! Teens are dressing up as mask-wearing grandmas to score alcohol trib.al/d6ku9jS jugs bunny @alliewach i'm going to dress like a horse so i can get ketamine
NEW YORK POST New York Post O @nypost · 2d Forget fake IDs! Teens are dressing up as mask-wearing grandmas to score alcohol trib.al/d6ku9jS jugs bunny @alliewach i'm going to dress like a horse so i can get ketamine

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horse ketamine grandmas alcohol fake ids

Big Hairy Werewolf BF

stfu @AceSpur My baby treats me so good optimist prime @louiemagnums Until it's a full moon > >
stfu @AceSpur My baby treats me so good optimist prime @louiemagnums Until it's a full moon > >

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my partner treat me so good until it's a full moon werewolf hairy hand

Cheating With Whom

Sports Dokita (Odogwu b) @Sports_Doctor2 When your partner tells you he/she cheated on you, I know there's a temptation to ask "with who?" Resist it. Instead ask "with whom?" Speak good English no matter the circumstances. 9:53 pm 01 Mar 21 · Twitter for Android
Sports Dokita (Odogwu b) @Sports_Doctor2 When your partner tells you he/she cheated on you, I know there's a temptation to ask "with who?" Resist it. Instead ask "with whom?" Speak good English no matter the circumstances. 9:53 pm 01 Mar 21 · Twitter for Android

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cheating partner resist with whom who grammar english

The British Museum

The Trashies @TheTrashiesUK What's something that feels British but isn't? The contents of the British Museum TRASH TRASH
The Trashies @TheTrashiesUK What's something that feels British but isn't? The contents of the British Museum TRASH TRASH

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something that feels british but isn't the contents of the british museum colonialism empire

Vegan Seafood

Jimmy's Famous Seafood @JimmysSeafood INMIS Be sure to try our vegan options. e BioBinaryTrader @kenser80 12h Replying to @JimmysSeafood Just so you guys know. Feta cheese is not vegan. Might want to look into that Q2 @Ji... · 12h v Jimmy's Famous Seafood Yeah we really don't care. IMMYS
Jimmy's Famous Seafood @JimmysSeafood INMIS Be sure to try our vegan options. e BioBinaryTrader @kenser80 12h Replying to @JimmysSeafood Just so you guys know. Feta cheese is not vegan. Might want to look into that Q2 @Ji... · 12h v Jimmy's Famous Seafood Yeah we really don't care. IMMYS

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jimmy's famous seafood vegan option feta vegetarian yeah we don't really care

Land O'Lakes

They got rid of the Indian and kept the land. How American 100 Farmer-Owned LAND O LAKES OD 4 STICKS NET WT.ILB. (453.6g) BUTTER SALTED Farmer-Owned 100 CALORES PLA TP LANDOLAKES SINCE 1921 4 STICKS NET WI.11b (453.6 g) BUTTER SALTED TO... ... ........
They got rid of the Indian and kept the land. How American 100 Farmer-Owned LAND O LAKES OD 4 STICKS NET WT.ILB. (453.6g) BUTTER SALTED Farmer-Owned 100 CALORES PLA TP LANDOLAKES SINCE 1921 4 STICKS NET WI.11b (453.6 g) BUTTER SALTED TO... ... ........

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land o lakes butter indian native american racist product