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* In le pool with le friends *Deciding whether or not to take a piss* /s *Decides to take piss* ONE MINUTE THIRTU SEVEN SECONDS LATER. I am a 参 squid POKER FACIE True Story

* In le pool with le friends *Deciding whether or not to take a piss* /s *Decides to take piss* ONE MINUTE THIRTU SEVEN SECONDS LATER. I am a 参 squid POKER FACIE True Story

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Real Talk

Real Talk

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Browsing reddit, five minutes after waking up when.. reddi 皆 le wild text appears CHALLENGE ACCEPTED hey derp, we'1l be there in 10 minutes i KNOW you won't be ready EAT BREAKFAST TAKE A SHOWER F----- READY TO GO GET DRESSED EVEN HAD TIME TO MAKE THIS RAGE COMIC, BITCH

Browsing reddit, five minutes after waking up when.. reddi 皆 le wild text appears CHALLENGE ACCEPTED hey derp, we'1l be there in 10 minutes i KNOW you won't be ready EAT BREAKFAST TAKE A SHOWER F----- READY TO GO GET DRESSED EVEN HAD TIME TO MAKE THIS RAGE COMIC, BITCH

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Hmm, but it has an odd number of There I finally finished my rage comic anels.. I think I know how to solve this problem... True Story

Hmm, but it has an odd number of There I finally finished my rage comic anels.. I think I know how to solve this problem... True Story

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*Le girlfriend coming over, mom don't know i'm gay Mom bitchin as usual, dad big chillin like a boss ONE MINUTE THiRTU SEVEN SECONDS LATER *Knock at the door* Sexy Boss of a gf is here, up stairs for some quiet sexy time. BIC Bout to go down on my sweetums, butt ass nekid The unlocked f------ door o' doom "I thought i- Unbeknownst to me, mom was bringing my clothes to me. P----- i'd forgotten about them She % a lezbiarn isn't she? Yep. . . for about 3 year CHHCHHH FFFTCH FFFTH HTPF 이사주FFCH True Story

*Le girlfriend coming over, mom don't know i'm gay Mom bitchin as usual, dad big chillin like a boss ONE MINUTE THiRTU SEVEN SECONDS LATER *Knock at the door* Sexy Boss of a gf is here, up stairs for some quiet sexy time. BIC Bout to go down on my sweetums, butt ass nekid The unlocked f------ door o' doom "I thought i- Unbeknownst to me, mom was bringing my clothes to me. P----- i'd forgotten about them She % a lezbiarn isn't she? Yep. . . for about 3 year CHHCHHH FFFTCH FFFTH HTPF 이사주FFCH True Story

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when suddenly... - *le brother and father on peaceful Quail hunting trip in central Texas A wild Quail appears! As part of my brother's passage le idiot into manhood, it is crucial that brother he knows what it's like to ki11 something, or he could turn gay POW!!!! "kill him son, kill him dead. " Good shot, eh pops?? NO, DERP, YOU SHOT ME!! 0 *father, on le deathbead, about to go under the knife "son, whatever you do, don't make Iun of Derp,he's really LATER raumatized right now." me I understand." at the hospital mom: "I brought some sodas for you boys!'" AFE MOMENTS LATER brother me Sweet Jesus, you will be mine, mark my words CHALLENGE CONSIDERED "hey Derp, I want the Dr. Pepper". · |"Tell ye what, how 'bouts "no, I want the whoever DIDN'T shoot Dad | gets the Dr. Pepper. .." r. Pepper." "No, "No, I want want it." it." frue Story

when suddenly... - *le brother and father on peaceful Quail hunting trip in central Texas A wild Quail appears! As part of my brother's passage le idiot into manhood, it is crucial that brother he knows what it's like to ki11 something, or he could turn gay POW!!!! "kill him son, kill him dead. " Good shot, eh pops?? NO, DERP, YOU SHOT ME!! 0 *father, on le deathbead, about to go under the knife "son, whatever you do, don't make Iun of Derp,he's really LATER raumatized right now." me I understand." at the hospital mom: "I brought some sodas for you boys!'" AFE MOMENTS LATER brother me Sweet Jesus, you will be mine, mark my words CHALLENGE CONSIDERED "hey Derp, I want the Dr. Pepper". · |"Tell ye what, how 'bouts "no, I want the whoever DIDN'T shoot Dad | gets the Dr. Pepper. .." r. Pepper." "No, "No, I want want it." it." frue Story

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Meet our hero: Me Friends think I'm gay I am. But they don't know that Derping at the mall when suddenly... Sexy Herpina walks past us. My friends see me checking her out *huh. Guess you aren't gay after all. I was checking out her shoes

Meet our hero: Me Friends think I'm gay I am. But they don't know that Derping at the mall when suddenly... Sexy Herpina walks past us. My friends see me checking her out *huh. Guess you aren't gay after all. I was checking out her shoes

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untrue story

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Me derping around AKE Suddenly, a huge crate of wild egg timers appear!! Proceeds to set about 60 egg timers to go off in 10 minutes, while keeping track of previ egg timer's times* ous Cool, no one's looking PFFFTTTCHH CHHCHHH CHHPFFF PFFFFTCH CHHTPF PFFCHH CHHCH egg egg timers timers random lady walks by and grabsan egg timer, oblivious to the ticking of a billion egg timers* *Ie run a ay * POKER FACE RIN RIN RINGRIN RING RI rue Story

Me derping around AKE Suddenly, a huge crate of wild egg timers appear!! Proceeds to set about 60 egg timers to go off in 10 minutes, while keeping track of previ egg timer's times* ous Cool, no one's looking PFFFTTTCHH CHHCHHH CHHPFFF PFFFFTCH CHHTPF PFFCHH CHHCH egg egg timers timers random lady walks by and grabsan egg timer, oblivious to the ticking of a billion egg timers* *Ie run a ay * POKER FACE RIN RIN RINGRIN RING RI rue Story

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I love my flute and you taught me to be true to myself. And my new school has a camp that is ONLY for band members!!! Herpette, I am so me listening to my tween daughter play the flute like a boss proud that you keep playing your flute even though kids at your new school think band is for dorks THAT SAME EVENINE * le super proud mom crying and signing camp permission slip getting nostalgic watching American Pie with husband And one time at band camp LOL What have I done!!! Trae Stoey

I love my flute and you taught me to be true to myself. And my new school has a camp that is ONLY for band members!!! Herpette, I am so me listening to my tween daughter play the flute like a boss proud that you keep playing your flute even though kids at your new school think band is for dorks THAT SAME EVENINE * le super proud mom crying and signing camp permission slip getting nostalgic watching American Pie with husband And one time at band camp LOL What have I done!!! Trae Stoey

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固 le me supervisor around with my cute co-worker* derping *suddenly another co-worker arrives* Hey guys what's going on? *bla bla bla* 回回 OMG. His breath stinks. Even when we're not close to him Well, see you later guys. I will be here helping you in the afternoon OMG, herp. The guy's breath stinks. I can't work with him around You need to do something Yeah. His breath is really dangerous and powerful. He has a Dragon Breath whispers *Help me herp It's the dragon+ Dragon Breath..LOL Hey again Hey dude. why don't you go help the Derp's section. I know they could use some help. We're fine here ok, I will. Are you sure you dont need me? POKER FACE ok, Bye Oh herp. Thank you so much. Yeh I'm sure. we're ok Don't worry Princess.. le phone *ring ring* the Evi Hello? W-- is this s---, Herp? You send me a guy with a breath that is killing my co-workers Everyone is trying to stay away from him. He's even scaring the 1 costumers The dragon is attacking othe villages

固 le me supervisor around with my cute co-worker* derping *suddenly another co-worker arrives* Hey guys what's going on? *bla bla bla* 回回 OMG. His breath stinks. Even when we're not close to him Well, see you later guys. I will be here helping you in the afternoon OMG, herp. The guy's breath stinks. I can't work with him around You need to do something Yeah. His breath is really dangerous and powerful. He has a Dragon Breath whispers *Help me herp It's the dragon+ Dragon Breath..LOL Hey again Hey dude. why don't you go help the Derp's section. I know they could use some help. We're fine here ok, I will. Are you sure you dont need me? POKER FACE ok, Bye Oh herp. Thank you so much. Yeh I'm sure. we're ok Don't worry Princess.. le phone *ring ring* the Evi Hello? W-- is this s---, Herp? You send me a guy with a breath that is killing my co-workers Everyone is trying to stay away from him. He's even scaring the 1 costumers The dragon is attacking othe villages

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Once upon a time... a happy relationship (6 years long) and then... le gf gets all jealous and angry with no reason CHEATED * le gf le me F-- OW THIST babe i haven't done anything i swear to you but i'm so sorry if hurt your feelings please tell me what i did and i promess never do it again *3 months later, she went study in germany bye babe, in three months i'll go visit you, i love *i REALLY wasn't cheating on her [you SO much and NEVER cheated and after a 1 of begging (6 months) we were fine again* bye babe months later, i get to germany and sense the things a little strange we're cool, right? if something has happened, u can tell me, i'11 understand sure, i love you forever, everythin is fine! that's great! i love you more than ever, i'm so happy by your side, i wanna be forever with you!!! actually she lied, she cheated me with tons of guys while in germany and a i've discovered it by myself while still in germany True Story

Once upon a time... a happy relationship (6 years long) and then... le gf gets all jealous and angry with no reason CHEATED * le gf le me F-- OW THIST babe i haven't done anything i swear to you but i'm so sorry if hurt your feelings please tell me what i did and i promess never do it again *3 months later, she went study in germany bye babe, in three months i'll go visit you, i love *i REALLY wasn't cheating on her [you SO much and NEVER cheated and after a 1 of begging (6 months) we were fine again* bye babe months later, i get to germany and sense the things a little strange we're cool, right? if something has happened, u can tell me, i'11 understand sure, i love you forever, everythin is fine! that's great! i love you more than ever, i'm so happy by your side, i wanna be forever with you!!! actually she lied, she cheated me with tons of guys while in germany and a i've discovered it by myself while still in germany True Story

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At the factory

*me at a friends wedding Hey derp did you check out the chocolate fountain? Me Augustus *Slip on randorm troll dark matter True Story

*me at a friends wedding Hey derp did you check out the chocolate fountain? Me Augustus *Slip on randorm troll dark matter True Story

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I don't know how I'm gonna make it through the day *Heading out to my job which I hate* *Suddenly an Idea appears* Maybe I'11 get fired! I know I'1l get wasted and come into work drunk! 7 *I proceed to get my drink on* LATER My boss appears* Thank yo...u miss... have a amazing day! Herp the customers have been telling me how wel1 you 've been doing. Good Job! Awww. . .Thank you for being so sweet. I'm at work? ) /rue Story

I don't know how I'm gonna make it through the day *Heading out to my job which I hate* *Suddenly an Idea appears* Maybe I'11 get fired! I know I'1l get wasted and come into work drunk! 7 *I proceed to get my drink on* LATER My boss appears* Thank yo...u miss... have a amazing day! Herp the customers have been telling me how wel1 you 've been doing. Good Job! Awww. . .Thank you for being so sweet. I'm at work? ) /rue Story

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Me, derping around with friends who dragged me to Transformers 3, waiting for the movie to start Everyone quiets down as .. le random dude in the audience* *a wild title screen appears!*"WHAT THE F---?! I THOUGHT THIS WAS CARS 2!" LOL LOL And then the movie sucked LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL -) True Story

Me, derping around with friends who dragged me to Transformers 3, waiting for the movie to start Everyone quiets down as .. le random dude in the audience* *a wild title screen appears!*"WHAT THE F---?! I THOUGHT THIS WAS CARS 2!" LOL LOL And then the movie sucked LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL -) True Story

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Doritos D-10 AF1 6 BG2 7 CH3 8 DJ4 9 E K 10 AF1 6 BG2 7 CH3 8 D J4 9 E K 10 Zer.. What? One. . . ( ) True Story SUNMAID RAISINS D-1

Doritos D-10 AF1 6 BG2 7 CH3 8 DJ4 9 E K 10 AF1 6 BG2 7 CH3 8 D J4 9 E K 10 Zer.. What? One. . . ( ) True Story SUNMAID RAISINS D-1

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i am so broke blahblahblah i *le boyfriend's mom can't even take my weekly shopping trip to buy junk i don't le me le boyfrind. driving down the road need, we need to make some money oh! can you stop at that gas station so i can buy some cigarettes and lottery tickets? True Story happens every week

i am so broke blahblahblah i *le boyfriend's mom can't even take my weekly shopping trip to buy junk i don't le me le boyfrind. driving down the road need, we need to make some money oh! can you stop at that gas station so i can buy some cigarettes and lottery tickets? True Story happens every week

广。 erpette, Derp's gotta crush on you Derpette Me Me (Derp), Herp, Derpette, Derpina, and Herpette talking about crap at school Me Shrugs the accusation off like it's nothing. rue Story That would have been the perfect opportunity to get

广。 erpette, Derp's gotta crush on you Derpette Me Me (Derp), Herp, Derpette, Derpina, and Herpette talking about crap at school Me Shrugs the accusation off like it's nothing. rue Story That would have been the perfect opportunity to get

Driving along, doing the speed limit. What's this up here? Me Terrified citizens Troll cop driving 15 under going slow Space in front of me frees up Pass troll-cop at 5 over like a boss. And nothing happened. True Story F--- YEA

Driving along, doing the speed limit. What's this up here? Me Terrified citizens Troll cop driving 15 under going slow Space in front of me frees up Pass troll-cop at 5 over like a boss. And nothing happened. True Story F--- YEA