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Anon gets cursed by the digits | /r/Greentext

File: o.png (21 KB, 582x216) t The Intel Crab reposted Levent Kemal @leventkemaI - 35m IMPORTANT: Currently, Tehran-Istanbul flights are being cancelled one by one. This development indicates that there may be Iranian retaliation tonight. Via @aliicabuk/NTV 16 1 138 342 IRANIAN RETALIATION TONIGHT Anonymous (ID: ThRQ+a3m >>476646337 >>476648577 >> 28K 08/02/24(Fri)11:20:19 No.476638722 >>476639030 >>476639133 >>476639200 >>476639293 >>476639348 >>476640692 >>476640741 >>476640925 >>476641439 >>476641584>>476642412 >>476642613 >>476643428 >>476644070 Currently, Tehran-Istanbul flights are being cancelled one by one. This development indicates that there may be Iranian retaliation tonight. https://x.com/leventkemal/status/1819413802523164836 Anonymous (ID: 09P/YnYK) 08/02/24(Fri)11:20:53 No.476638788 >>476639314 >>476640692 Just two more weeks, bro Anonymous (ID: 10KcJlio) 08/02/24(Fri)11:21:32 No.476638857 ▶ >>476639100 >says twitter/pol/ At least I know now nothing's happen ☐ Anonymous (ID: 0682Vsfl) 08/02/24(Fri)11:23:15 No.476639030 >>476639391 >>476638722 (OP) its going to happen on the morning on their shabbat, before dawns first light so like 9-10 hours from now Anonymous (ID: LonYTy2D) 08/02/24(Fri)11:23:59 No.476639100 >>476639157 >>476639572 >>476639877 >>476640692 >>476640922 >>476641037 >>476641354 >>476641453 >>476641619 >>476641878 >>476642308 >>476642395 >>476642507 >>476642670 >>476642842 >>476643075 >>476643558 >>476643569 >>476643801 >>476644180 >>476644648 >>476645504 >>476645932 >>476646733 >>476647248 >>476648181 >>476648598 >>476638857 >At least I know now nothing's happen Nothing ever happens. This post ending in 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, or 9 proves it
File: o.png (21 KB, 582x216) t The Intel Crab reposted Levent Kemal @leventkemaI - 35m IMPORTANT: Currently, Tehran-Istanbul flights are being cancelled one by one. This development indicates that there may be Iranian retaliation tonight. Via @aliicabuk/NTV 16 1 138 342 IRANIAN RETALIATION TONIGHT Anonymous (ID: ThRQ+a3m >>476646337 >>476648577 >> 28K 08/02/24(Fri)11:20:19 No.476638722 >>476639030 >>476639133 >>476639200 >>476639293 >>476639348 >>476640692 >>476640741 >>476640925 >>476641439 >>476641584>>476642412 >>476642613 >>476643428 >>476644070 Currently, Tehran-Istanbul flights are being cancelled one by one. This development indicates that there may be Iranian retaliation tonight. https://x.com/leventkemal/status/1819413802523164836 Anonymous (ID: 09P/YnYK) 08/02/24(Fri)11:20:53 No.476638788 >>476639314 >>476640692 Just two more weeks, bro Anonymous (ID: 10KcJlio) 08/02/24(Fri)11:21:32 No.476638857 ▶ >>476639100 >says twitter/pol/ At least I know now nothing's happen ☐ Anonymous (ID: 0682Vsfl) 08/02/24(Fri)11:23:15 No.476639030 >>476639391 >>476638722 (OP) its going to happen on the morning on their shabbat, before dawns first light so like 9-10 hours from now Anonymous (ID: LonYTy2D) 08/02/24(Fri)11:23:59 No.476639100 >>476639157 >>476639572 >>476639877 >>476640692 >>476640922 >>476641037 >>476641354 >>476641453 >>476641619 >>476641878 >>476642308 >>476642395 >>476642507 >>476642670 >>476642842 >>476643075 >>476643558 >>476643569 >>476643801 >>476644180 >>476644648 >>476645504 >>476645932 >>476646733 >>476647248 >>476648181 >>476648598 >>476638857 >At least I know now nothing's happen Nothing ever happens. This post ending in 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, or 9 proves it

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His Majesty's Chosen | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)18:04:03 No.101468285 1710485663593410.jpg 374 KB JPG >get new iphone >accidentally hit my table (slightly) >completely broken Ah yes, this is the Apple™ quality. F--- off itoddler shills
Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)18:04:03 No.101468285 1710485663593410.jpg 374 KB JPG >get new iphone >accidentally hit my table (slightly) >completely broken Ah yes, this is the Apple™ quality. F--- off itoddler shills

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Foreign investment | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: AVGFKhVg) 07/27/24(Sat)09:54:09 No.475824400 & 1200x675_cmsv2_7ad9958e-fab1-5402-923e-4076a2b458a8-8601724.jpg >goes to a foreign country 91 KB JPG >lectures their congress to fight his wars >calls all protestors paid idiots >refuses to elaborate >leaves Is he the real gigachad?
Anonymous (ID: AVGFKhVg) 07/27/24(Sat)09:54:09 No.475824400 & 1200x675_cmsv2_7ad9958e-fab1-5402-923e-4076a2b458a8-8601724.jpg >goes to a foreign country 91 KB JPG >lectures their congress to fight his wars >calls all protestors paid idiots >refuses to elaborate >leaves Is he the real gigachad?

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Anon Doesn't Understand The Amazing Digital Circus | /r/Greentext

File: 1708036428477843.jpg (43 KB, 686x386) ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)14:50:01 No.144771646 >>144771665 >>144771683 >>144771686 >>144771744 >>144771745 >>144771757 >>144771801 >>144772176 >>144772200 >>144772737 >>144774078 >>144774137 NOOO IM TRAPPED IN A PERFECT WORLD FULL OF GAMES AND A REAL BENEVOLENT GOD WHERE I DONT HAVE TO PAY TAXES OR WORK EVER AGAIN AHHHHHHH ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)14:55:11 No.144771686 >>144771646 (OP) >Perfect world >Feel pain yet know you can't die >>144771693 >>144771754 >>144772088 >>144772176 >Suffer the fear of getting stuck due to glitches and never being found, forced to live through it endlessly until your mind breaks >"God is unstable and naive >Jax ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)14:56:15 No. 144771693 ►>>144771754 >>144773841 >>144771686 >You can't swear or be dirty >You have no c--- or balls >You are constantly watched or monitored Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)15:00:38 No.144771744 >>144771646 (OP) >TRAPPED IN A PERFECT WORLD FULL OF GAMES the world is incomplete and the games are deathtraps >A REAL BENEVOLENT GOD that will kill you with zero hesitation and pulls you around like a toy to do his bidding >I DONT HAVE TO PAY TAXES OR WORK EVER AGAIN you literally get turned into a wagie ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)15:01:27 No.144771754 ► >>144771686 >>144771693 >You don't possess a human form, you are most likely something that doesn't even resemble a human >At best you have arms ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)15:01:38 No.144771757 >>144771646 (OP) If you can't c-- it's not perfect.
File: 1708036428477843.jpg (43 KB, 686x386) ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)14:50:01 No.144771646 >>144771665 >>144771683 >>144771686 >>144771744 >>144771745 >>144771757 >>144771801 >>144772176 >>144772200 >>144772737 >>144774078 >>144774137 NOOO IM TRAPPED IN A PERFECT WORLD FULL OF GAMES AND A REAL BENEVOLENT GOD WHERE I DONT HAVE TO PAY TAXES OR WORK EVER AGAIN AHHHHHHH ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)14:55:11 No.144771686 >>144771646 (OP) >Perfect world >Feel pain yet know you can't die >>144771693 >>144771754 >>144772088 >>144772176 >Suffer the fear of getting stuck due to glitches and never being found, forced to live through it endlessly until your mind breaks >"God is unstable and naive >Jax ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)14:56:15 No. 144771693 ►>>144771754 >>144773841 >>144771686 >You can't swear or be dirty >You have no c--- or balls >You are constantly watched or monitored Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)15:00:38 No.144771744 >>144771646 (OP) >TRAPPED IN A PERFECT WORLD FULL OF GAMES the world is incomplete and the games are deathtraps >A REAL BENEVOLENT GOD that will kill you with zero hesitation and pulls you around like a toy to do his bidding >I DONT HAVE TO PAY TAXES OR WORK EVER AGAIN you literally get turned into a wagie ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)15:01:27 No.144771754 ► >>144771686 >>144771693 >You don't possess a human form, you are most likely something that doesn't even resemble a human >At best you have arms ☐ Anonymous 08/02/24(Fri)15:01:38 No.144771757 >>144771646 (OP) If you can't c-- it's not perfect.

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The ad effect | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1:21B YouTube Search YouTube ll 83 07/25/24(Thu)17:23:57 No.101567073 да youtube.jpg 109 KB JPG >open my youtube song playlist >mandatory ads every song how is this acceptable
Anonymous 1:21B YouTube Search YouTube ll 83 07/25/24(Thu)17:23:57 No.101567073 да youtube.jpg 109 KB JPG >open my youtube song playlist >mandatory ads every song how is this acceptable

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youtube advertisement enshittification playlist

Show bob and vagene not gym and regime | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/28/24(Sun)13:35:42 No.74793668 What would happen if we introduced flags to this board? Should we do it? 643 KB PNG Anonymous First board with no Indians 07/28/24(Sun)14:52:22 No.74794184
Anonymous 07/28/24(Sun)13:35:42 No.74793668 What would happen if we introduced flags to this board? Should we do it? 643 KB PNG Anonymous First board with no Indians 07/28/24(Sun)14:52:22 No.74794184

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anon gets a woody in Lidl | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Settings Mobile Home 06/24/24(Mon)16:11:46 No.77941464 88 KB JPG >move from geriatric commieblock to dynamic newbuilt codo district >go to local Lidl >it's full of hot young woman >girls in see-through skirts >girls with massive t--- >girls with perky t--- and no bras >girls in all shorts as if they were acting in rap music video >girls in summer-dresses W-- do I do bros, this s--- makes me horny and depressed at the same time. I can't even buy groceries in peace.
Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Settings Mobile Home 06/24/24(Mon)16:11:46 No.77941464 88 KB JPG >move from geriatric commieblock to dynamic newbuilt codo district >go to local Lidl >it's full of hot young woman >girls in see-through skirts >girls with massive t--- >girls with perky t--- and no bras >girls in all shorts as if they were acting in rap music video >girls in summer-dresses W-- do I do bros, this s--- makes me horny and depressed at the same time. I can't even buy groceries in peace.

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A day in the life of anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 360 KB PNG 11/21/20(Sat)14:32:58 No.61025172 >sleep for 12+ hours >wake up at noon >refresh the same few websites over and over again >do absolutely f------ nothing >start and try to play video game >quit after a few minutes because i cant even force myself to have fun with it anymore >continue refreshing 4chan and youtube for hours again occasionally watching a few youtube videos that look interesting and that i havent seen yet >go to sleep feeling like a tired corpse even though i havent done anything is this even a life anymore?
Anonymous 360 KB PNG 11/21/20(Sat)14:32:58 No.61025172 >sleep for 12+ hours >wake up at noon >refresh the same few websites over and over again >do absolutely f------ nothing >start and try to play video game >quit after a few minutes because i cant even force myself to have fun with it anymore >continue refreshing 4chan and youtube for hours again occasionally watching a few youtube videos that look interesting and that i havent seen yet >go to sleep feeling like a tired corpse even though i havent done anything is this even a life anymore?

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Anon was an investment | /r/Greentext

3h (9/14 11:52) - 74732416 10 Re 0 Img JPG 231KB (1205 × 1600) bushieboo.jpg >Married to childhood friend for 6 happy years >Wife wants to read her old diary from about 3rd grade with me >Sounds kinda dumb but if she's happy then fine >Mostly stupid kids stuff with random words like HATE in big writing >Eventually we get to the part where she meets me >According to the diary she only wanted to be friends because her logic was that nerds become rich and she wanted to marry me to get rich >Remember how she was always trying to get me to learn and get into college pretty much entire childhood >This led me to actually get a good job as software engineer >I lead a good life because my wife was a sociopathic gold digging 8 year old
3h (9/14 11:52) - 74732416 10 Re 0 Img JPG 231KB (1205 × 1600) bushieboo.jpg >Married to childhood friend for 6 happy years >Wife wants to read her old diary from about 3rd grade with me >Sounds kinda dumb but if she's happy then fine >Mostly stupid kids stuff with random words like HATE in big writing >Eventually we get to the part where she meets me >According to the diary she only wanted to be friends because her logic was that nerds become rich and she wanted to marry me to get rich >Remember how she was always trying to get me to learn and get into college pretty much entire childhood >This led me to actually get a good job as software engineer >I lead a good life because my wife was a sociopathic gold digging 8 year old

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Magician's trump card | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/25/24(Thu)22:12:47 No.201727094 hqdefault(1).jpg 34 KB JPG >undetectable spell which can kill anyone with 2 words >literally every magician can do it >they aren't using it randomly every day >most powerful wizard in the history of the earth >can't kill the people he wants with it
Anonymous 07/25/24(Thu)22:12:47 No.201727094 hqdefault(1).jpg 34 KB JPG >undetectable spell which can kill anyone with 2 words >literally every magician can do it >they aren't using it randomly every day >most powerful wizard in the history of the earth >can't kill the people he wants with it

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Anon punches women and gets medals for it | /r/Greentext

08/01/24(Thu)11:48:33 No.476504743 Female boxer yells 'this is unjust' and falls to her knees in tears as she quits fight against 'biologically male' Olympic opponent Imane Khelif after just 46 SECONDS following two powerful punches By Shekar Bhatia In Paris and Tom Cotterill 11:44 01 Aug 2024, updated 12:35 01 Aug 2024 TA This is what you voted for. Suffer.jpg 117 KB JPG >The beatings will continue until morale improves
08/01/24(Thu)11:48:33 No.476504743 Female boxer yells 'this is unjust' and falls to her knees in tears as she quits fight against 'biologically male' Olympic opponent Imane Khelif after just 46 SECONDS following two powerful punches By Shekar Bhatia In Paris and Tom Cotterill 11:44 01 Aug 2024, updated 12:35 01 Aug 2024 TA This is what you voted for. Suffer.jpg 117 KB JPG >The beatings will continue until morale improves

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best friend needs help from anon | /r/Greentext

File: Screenshot 2024-08-01 172128.jpg (37 KB, 835x480) Anonymous 08/01/24(Thu)17:29:16 No. 11676424 ► > be me > best friend has a gf > come to me > "anon, I need help" > "of course best friend" > "I want to celebrate half a year with my girlfriend so I need ideas for 'half-themed' presents" >brainstorm.jpeg >"Oh I know" >"You know what fits the theme of 'half' best? when she takes half of your things in divorce" >"anon, you're really special. You can make a happy meal cry" >blocks me >mfw
File: Screenshot 2024-08-01 172128.jpg (37 KB, 835x480) Anonymous 08/01/24(Thu)17:29:16 No. 11676424 ► > be me > best friend has a gf > come to me > "anon, I need help" > "of course best friend" > "I want to celebrate half a year with my girlfriend so I need ideas for 'half-themed' presents" >brainstorm.jpeg >"Oh I know" >"You know what fits the theme of 'half' best? when she takes half of your things in divorce" >"anon, you're really special. You can make a happy meal cry" >blocks me >mfw

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What went wrong? | /r/Greentext

Anymouse (ID: dXkOOF5M 07/25/24(Thu)14:27:20 No.475596039 IMG_3749.jpg 36 KB JPG >sell your soul to the devil >become the antichrist >bad things happen to you how could this have happened
Anymouse (ID: dXkOOF5M 07/25/24(Thu)14:27:20 No.475596039 IMG_3749.jpg 36 KB JPG >sell your soul to the devil >become the antichrist >bad things happen to you how could this have happened

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Anon is a weeb. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 286 KB PNG 08/01/24(Thu)18:28:44 No.78352213 I have a good reason for hating all moids... >Spent years at warsaw college learning Japanese/business skills >Finally get enough money to move to Tohoku as English teacher >Get bullied by the kids for being a subhuman femcel >Little kids even draw pictures of me as a tengu and nigawari >Takes two years for them to respect me but they still call me nicknames like "pale pig" and "snowy rat face" in secret >Only have one friend and she is from Poland but spends her free time with her bf So I was so very lonely and decided to try dating >99% of Japanese guys on every dating app refuse to date me >I'm a desperate femcel that is dying of loneliness >Decide to massively drop my standards and even give the perverted creeps a chance >Started to date this really short ugly Japanese guy that works in a warehouse and has acne >He was pretty much stalking me on all my socials and dating apps >On our first date he takes me to burger king >On second date he only takes me to crappy bar where I see rats >I reluctantly have sex with him but only because I have nightmare about dying alone >It was really violent, he only goes for 3 minutes and I was bleeding >He gives me a shiny ring and said he comes back in two three/weeks to marry me It has been two months. My private parts have itchy green and red spots. I have stopped having my periods. I did a pregnancy test and it said I'm positive. I don't have enough money for abortion. I ran into my ex boyfriend in Tokyo and he was kissing a Japanese cosplay stacy... I will have to go home to Poland, but my catholic father will not allow me to get abortion.. all moids should die..
Anonymous 286 KB PNG 08/01/24(Thu)18:28:44 No.78352213 I have a good reason for hating all moids... >Spent years at warsaw college learning Japanese/business skills >Finally get enough money to move to Tohoku as English teacher >Get bullied by the kids for being a subhuman femcel >Little kids even draw pictures of me as a tengu and nigawari >Takes two years for them to respect me but they still call me nicknames like "pale pig" and "snowy rat face" in secret >Only have one friend and she is from Poland but spends her free time with her bf So I was so very lonely and decided to try dating >99% of Japanese guys on every dating app refuse to date me >I'm a desperate femcel that is dying of loneliness >Decide to massively drop my standards and even give the perverted creeps a chance >Started to date this really short ugly Japanese guy that works in a warehouse and has acne >He was pretty much stalking me on all my socials and dating apps >On our first date he takes me to burger king >On second date he only takes me to crappy bar where I see rats >I reluctantly have sex with him but only because I have nightmare about dying alone >It was really violent, he only goes for 3 minutes and I was bleeding >He gives me a shiny ring and said he comes back in two three/weeks to marry me It has been two months. My private parts have itchy green and red spots. I have stopped having my periods. I did a pregnancy test and it said I'm positive. I don't have enough money for abortion. I ran into my ex boyfriend in Tokyo and he was kissing a Japanese cosplay stacy... I will have to go home to Poland, but my catholic father will not allow me to get abortion.. all moids should die..

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Heroes of the Soviet Union | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)15:59:40 No.101466333 Microsoft reportedly fires DEI team becoming latest company to ditch 'woke' policy By Ariel Zilber Published July 17, 2024, 2:18 p.m. ET - 95 Comments Microsoft has reportedly laid off a team devoted to diversity, equity and inclusion after pouring millions of dollars into the initiative - becoming the latest major company to ditch the "woke" policy. The Big Tech giant disbanded the DEI team at the beginning of the month due to "changing business needs," according to a July 1 email obtained by Business Insider. It is unclear how many employees were affected. The decision was a further sign that companies are pulling back on diversity-based initiatives that were put in place following the 2020 death of George Floyd and the subsequent Black Lives Matter protest campaigns. 1706247562805034.png 334 KB PNG >Microsoft fires their DEI team >a day later someone s---- into their servers Pure coincidence
: Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)15:59:40 No.101466333 Microsoft reportedly fires DEI team becoming latest company to ditch 'woke' policy By Ariel Zilber Published July 17, 2024, 2:18 p.m. ET - 95 Comments Microsoft has reportedly laid off a team devoted to diversity, equity and inclusion after pouring millions of dollars into the initiative - becoming the latest major company to ditch the "woke" policy. The Big Tech giant disbanded the DEI team at the beginning of the month due to "changing business needs," according to a July 1 email obtained by Business Insider. It is unclear how many employees were affected. The decision was a further sign that companies are pulling back on diversity-based initiatives that were put in place following the 2020 death of George Floyd and the subsequent Black Lives Matter protest campaigns. 1706247562805034.png 334 KB PNG >Microsoft fires their DEI team >a day later someone s---- into their servers Pure coincidence

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Anon shouldn't have done that | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: IXamPOMS) 08/01/24(Thu)07:43:07 No.476481253 24 PAR PARIS Gupta jeet gun.jpg 60 KB JPG 7 NOW >*click* >"I told you not to redeem code gandu benchode"
Anonymous (ID: IXamPOMS) 08/01/24(Thu)07:43:07 No.476481253 24 PAR PARIS Gupta jeet gun.jpg 60 KB JPG 7 NOW >*click* >"I told you not to redeem code gandu benchode"

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The Dev life | /r/Greentext

Anonymous R ☑E 07/25/24(Thu)16:52:21 No.683703720 VARDAR arasaka ORBITAL AIR 3.8KM BLACK STEEL IN THE HOUR OF CHADS Meet Reed at the abandoned hotel. Drow Weapon Switch Camera Q Get off F Screenshot 2024-07-24 154534.png 3.97 MB PNG >be employee at good gaming company >work for 5 years designing different sized cups and dirt particles >game is a megahit >shareholders and owners split the profits amongst themselves >only thing you get is more work on the sequel Guys.. why should game devs put any 'soul' into their work if they aren't gonna reap any benefits? Makes sense to do the bare minimum and chill in a nice expensive office.
Anonymous R ☑E 07/25/24(Thu)16:52:21 No.683703720 VARDAR arasaka ORBITAL AIR 3.8KM BLACK STEEL IN THE HOUR OF CHADS Meet Reed at the abandoned hotel. Drow Weapon Switch Camera Q Get off F Screenshot 2024-07-24 154534.png 3.97 MB PNG >be employee at good gaming company >work for 5 years designing different sized cups and dirt particles >game is a megahit >shareholders and owners split the profits amongst themselves >only thing you get is more work on the sequel Guys.. why should game devs put any 'soul' into their work if they aren't gonna reap any benefits? Makes sense to do the bare minimum and chill in a nice expensive office.

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Anon start to suspect something | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 410 KB JPG 01/01/22(Sat)11:45:42 No.668 >asexual gf wants me to wear chastity cage >ok >now asexual gf wants me to wear panties I'm starting to think she's not asexual
: Anonymous 410 KB JPG 01/01/22(Sat)11:45:42 No.668 >asexual gf wants me to wear chastity cage >ok >now asexual gf wants me to wear panties I'm starting to think she's not asexual

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Anon Fumbles the Bag | /r/Greentext

toad.png (27 KB, 382x373) google yandex iqdb wait >they're both just nervously laughing Anonymous 08/01/24(Thu)12:55:25 No.78349475 >>78349507 >at my universities bar last night >liquid courage sends me cartwheeling to the nearest cute girl, lets call her Lisa >Lisa was having shots alone at the bar counter, so i decided to approach her >surprisingly she isn't turned off by my stinky drunk ass coming onto her with the dryest opener ever >we start chatting and immediately hit it off, making each other laugh like crazy and actually having a lot in common >she's a Biomedical Science undergraduate student who loves to read manwha and play video games in her free time >immediately in f------ love with this girl, she's super smart and relatable >we both agree we should hangout some time, so we follow each other on Instagram >decide i should just risk it for the biscuit, say f--- it and ask if she needs a ride home >about to ask when her fat friend, lets call her Jelly Roll, comes thundering up to her side >"Hey girlie. Who is this guy? Leave her alone, she's not interested" >i think of all the 'fat friend cockblocker' memes and burst into laughter >my sufficiently drunk ass unable to hold it in, i start making fun of her >open my mouth and slowly drift forward to imitate a whale eating krill while making whale noises >beat my chest like a gorilla saying "000 000 00 NO TOUCH OOO NO TOUCH" >not many people are in the bar since it's for students only, so half the people there are now staring at me because i just loudly made animal noises and beat my chest like a f------ retard >"Sorry, I've had a lot to drink tonight haha" >"...It's okay, I understand anon. I get a little silly when I'm drunk too. Anyway, I need to catch the next train, so I'm going to head off now. Nice meeting you anon. Bye" >check Instagram this morning and shes unfollowed me >mfw i fumbled girlfriend material by bullying her fat f------ friend i'm going to be alone for f------ ever
toad.png (27 KB, 382x373) google yandex iqdb wait >they're both just nervously laughing Anonymous 08/01/24(Thu)12:55:25 No.78349475 >>78349507 >at my universities bar last night >liquid courage sends me cartwheeling to the nearest cute girl, lets call her Lisa >Lisa was having shots alone at the bar counter, so i decided to approach her >surprisingly she isn't turned off by my stinky drunk ass coming onto her with the dryest opener ever >we start chatting and immediately hit it off, making each other laugh like crazy and actually having a lot in common >she's a Biomedical Science undergraduate student who loves to read manwha and play video games in her free time >immediately in f------ love with this girl, she's super smart and relatable >we both agree we should hangout some time, so we follow each other on Instagram >decide i should just risk it for the biscuit, say f--- it and ask if she needs a ride home >about to ask when her fat friend, lets call her Jelly Roll, comes thundering up to her side >"Hey girlie. Who is this guy? Leave her alone, she's not interested" >i think of all the 'fat friend cockblocker' memes and burst into laughter >my sufficiently drunk ass unable to hold it in, i start making fun of her >open my mouth and slowly drift forward to imitate a whale eating krill while making whale noises >beat my chest like a gorilla saying "000 000 00 NO TOUCH OOO NO TOUCH" >not many people are in the bar since it's for students only, so half the people there are now staring at me because i just loudly made animal noises and beat my chest like a f------ retard >"Sorry, I've had a lot to drink tonight haha" >"...It's okay, I understand anon. I get a little silly when I'm drunk too. Anyway, I need to catch the next train, so I'm going to head off now. Nice meeting you anon. Bye" >check Instagram this morning and shes unfollowed me >mfw i fumbled girlfriend material by bullying her fat f------ friend i'm going to be alone for f------ ever

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anon asks why | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/15/18(Sun)14:36:53 No.44699542 Why didn't you become a cargo pilot, robots? >easier than driving a car >don't have to deal with normie passengers >aesthetic night flying >inflated paycheck >chad as f--- >women think its sexy >fun >boxes don't complain about hard landings >boxes don't clap like retards >boxes can't hijack you >only work 3 times a week >boxes don't complain about being late
Anonymous 04/15/18(Sun)14:36:53 No.44699542 Why didn't you become a cargo pilot, robots? >easier than driving a car >don't have to deal with normie passengers >aesthetic night flying >inflated paycheck >chad as f--- >women think its sexy >fun >boxes don't complain about hard landings >boxes don't clap like retards >boxes can't hijack you >only work 3 times a week >boxes don't complain about being late

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