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when someone finds out | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 49 KB WEBP 8/3/2024, 3:31:34 PM > going through twitter No.39786797 > find a about some artist having a freakout about there oc being on the banner > check to see if this is true > it is
Anonymous 49 KB WEBP 8/3/2024, 3:31:34 PM > going through twitter No.39786797 > find a about some artist having a freakout about there oc being on the banner > check to see if this is true > it is

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Judas was a fool | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/25/24(Thu)05:52:31 No.16889066 Judas-2.jpg 2.77 MB JPG >sees a guy perform straight up sorcery >betrays him Was Judas retarded? Even on the off chance he WASNT the son of God you're still messing with some high level wizard
: Anonymous 07/25/24(Thu)05:52:31 No.16889066 Judas-2.jpg 2.77 MB JPG >sees a guy perform straight up sorcery >betrays him Was Judas retarded? Even on the off chance he WASNT the son of God you're still messing with some high level wizard

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anon resists gluttony | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 51 KB JPG 05/31/23(Wed)10:03:20 No.73514876 >at McDonald's drive thru >approaching to the window >"What can I get for you, sir?" >being silent for several minutes >hearing angry swearings from people behind you and nervous honking >10 minutes later >finally giving an answer >"Nothing" >Driving away immediately
Anonymous 51 KB JPG 05/31/23(Wed)10:03:20 No.73514876 >at McDonald's drive thru >approaching to the window >"What can I get for you, sir?" >being silent for several minutes >hearing angry swearings from people behind you and nervous honking >10 minutes later >finally giving an answer >"Nothing" >Driving away immediately

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Anon is not a fan of the USA | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 140 KB JPG 06/28/21(Mon)14:52:01 No.857854052 >highest number of prisoners PER CAPITA >highest violent crime rate in the western world >highest number of mass shootings of any developed country >no universal healthcare >super high tuition, high student loan debt >richest corporations pay exactly $0 in taxes >2 party political system that produces nothing >staggering amounts of homelessness >has been at war every decade >opioid and prescription pill addicted youth Be sure to celebrate it all on July 4th.
Anonymous 140 KB JPG 06/28/21(Mon)14:52:01 No.857854052 >highest number of prisoners PER CAPITA >highest violent crime rate in the western world >highest number of mass shootings of any developed country >no universal healthcare >super high tuition, high student loan debt >richest corporations pay exactly $0 in taxes >2 party political system that produces nothing >staggering amounts of homelessness >has been at war every decade >opioid and prescription pill addicted youth Be sure to celebrate it all on July 4th.

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Anon becomes a redditor | /r/Greentext

[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [Auto] File: d7e-3011696890.jpg (76 KB, 1200x1200) [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [☐ Auto] Anonymous 08/03/24(Sat) 10:54:43 No.922315967 ► >be me >Download reddit to see what normies are up to >Make a joke about a guy being a cuck that calls someone a white supremacist over minor disagreement on r/rare insults >Get called a white supremacist >Click on their profile >"Active in these communities r/whiteboy discussion r/BNWobsessed >Uninstall app These people are beyond parody [Post a Reply] 0/0/? 0/0/?
[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [Auto] File: d7e-3011696890.jpg (76 KB, 1200x1200) [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [☐ Auto] Anonymous 08/03/24(Sat) 10:54:43 No.922315967 ► >be me >Download reddit to see what normies are up to >Make a joke about a guy being a cuck that calls someone a white supremacist over minor disagreement on r/rare insults >Get called a white supremacist >Click on their profile >"Active in these communities r/whiteboy discussion r/BNWobsessed >Uninstall app These people are beyond parody [Post a Reply] 0/0/? 0/0/?

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Honor and Loyalty | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)07:49:56 No.201439924 ultraboglight.jpg 58 KB JPG >YOU HAD SEX WITH THAT SHIFTER 20 TIMES??? >WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE LOOKS JUST LIKE ME AND HAD ACCESS TO ALL MY MEMORIES SO SHE PERFECTED MY PERSONALITY TOO?? >YOU SHOULD'VE KNOWN IT WASN'T ME! >I DON'T CARE IF THE SHIFTER BASICALLY R---- YOU DAYS AFTER TEK-KNIGHT DID >ME, THE SUPERHERO, COULDN'T ESCAPE FROM A CHAIN FOR 10 DAYS! THATS WORSE! >APOLOGIZE TO ME NOWWWW! I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE DAD JUST DIED. I'M THE ONE WHO SHOULD BE FELT BAD FOR >MY MOM IS ANGRY THAT I GOT AN ABORTION, I'M DEPRESSED, I'M THE VICTIM Why do the writers expect us to like this character?
: Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)07:49:56 No.201439924 ultraboglight.jpg 58 KB JPG >YOU HAD SEX WITH THAT SHIFTER 20 TIMES??? >WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE LOOKS JUST LIKE ME AND HAD ACCESS TO ALL MY MEMORIES SO SHE PERFECTED MY PERSONALITY TOO?? >YOU SHOULD'VE KNOWN IT WASN'T ME! >I DON'T CARE IF THE SHIFTER BASICALLY R---- YOU DAYS AFTER TEK-KNIGHT DID >ME, THE SUPERHERO, COULDN'T ESCAPE FROM A CHAIN FOR 10 DAYS! THATS WORSE! >APOLOGIZE TO ME NOWWWW! I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE DAD JUST DIED. I'M THE ONE WHO SHOULD BE FELT BAD FOR >MY MOM IS ANGRY THAT I GOT AN ABORTION, I'M DEPRESSED, I'M THE VICTIM Why do the writers expect us to like this character?

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anon watches hamza | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 KB JPG 06/15/24(Sat)23:40:56 No.31451466 >waking up early >sun exposure >cold shower >water, coffee, and milk only >heavy reading >lifting, running, calisthenics, swimming (some kind of physical activity) >balanced diet with good intake of protein >no p--- >8-9 hours of sleep what else?
Anonymous 8 KB JPG 06/15/24(Sat)23:40:56 No.31451466 >waking up early >sun exposure >cold shower >water, coffee, and milk only >heavy reading >lifting, running, calisthenics, swimming (some kind of physical activity) >balanced diet with good intake of protein >no p--- >8-9 hours of sleep what else?

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Iron Domed | /r/Greentext

mother I want to die and become a martyr inshallah my son Iron dome your son died >>476724599 # why did you kill him?! IMG_5579.jpg 636 KB JPG >wants to become a martyr >becomes a martyr >his family complains >rinse and repeat
mother I want to die and become a martyr inshallah my son Iron dome your son died >>476724599 # why did you kill him?! IMG_5579.jpg 636 KB JPG >wants to become a martyr >becomes a martyr >his family complains >rinse and repeat

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Peeping tom | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/27/24(Sat)22:13:23 No.201810891 BROWARD COUNTY PESCUE DEPARTMENT CAN RESCUE BUREAU 1297957008179_ORIGINAL.jpg 31 KB JPG >Did you just look at my boobs just now? How do you respond without sounding like a misogynist pervert?
Anonymous 07/27/24(Sat)22:13:23 No.201810891 BROWARD COUNTY PESCUE DEPARTMENT CAN RESCUE BUREAU 1297957008179_ORIGINAL.jpg 31 KB JPG >Did you just look at my boobs just now? How do you respond without sounding like a misogynist pervert?

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Anon chews 5 gum | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/07/18(Sun)22:59:29 No.781775753 >be me >19 yo 6/10 >Go out to movie with bestie of 3 years >9/10 5 KB PNG >Its technically a date >Dinner and movie >Get ice cream afterwards >Give her a glass flower I bought earlier in the month >She loves it and we go for a walk >Pull out 5GUM:TRUTH OR DARE PACK >Her wrapper says take a selfie with eyes closed >She does >I read mine It says to ask the most beautiful person in the room to kiss >We laugh it off but u remember the glass flower base has a mirror on the bottom side Where's the most beautiful girl at though? >Look at the mirrored base Oh look I found her! >Showed her the mirrored base of the flower >We smile and kiss for the first time ever >She reads the other part of the wrapper >"What's the most romantic moment you've shared with the person next to you?" >"This one right now" >mfw how it feels to chew 5gum
Anonymous 10/07/18(Sun)22:59:29 No.781775753 >be me >19 yo 6/10 >Go out to movie with bestie of 3 years >9/10 5 KB PNG >Its technically a date >Dinner and movie >Get ice cream afterwards >Give her a glass flower I bought earlier in the month >She loves it and we go for a walk >Pull out 5GUM:TRUTH OR DARE PACK >Her wrapper says take a selfie with eyes closed >She does >I read mine It says to ask the most beautiful person in the room to kiss >We laugh it off but u remember the glass flower base has a mirror on the bottom side Where's the most beautiful girl at though? >Look at the mirrored base Oh look I found her! >Showed her the mirrored base of the flower >We smile and kiss for the first time ever >She reads the other part of the wrapper >"What's the most romantic moment you've shared with the person next to you?" >"This one right now" >mfw how it feels to chew 5gum

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Anon loves his parents | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 45 KB JPG 08/03/24(Sat) 04:22:10 No.78369609 >tfw dad turns 60 in a few days I dont want my parents to get old, fellas.
: Anonymous 45 KB JPG 08/03/24(Sat) 04:22:10 No.78369609 >tfw dad turns 60 in a few days I dont want my parents to get old, fellas.

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Anon loves his cat | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 16 KB JPG >be me 06/25/22(Sat) 16:14:58 No.69175611 >meet girl at party >take her home after hitting it off >get hot and heavy in bed >tell her I don't have any condoms >she doesn't mind, says we can just cuddle >cat comes in and sits on my dresser >immediately get up and start playing with cat >play with cat for long time >girl gets up and starts putting on her clothes >ask if shes alright >lame excuse of saying she had to be somewhere >ok then, maybe another time >go back to playing with cat >girl leaves, messages me later calling me a f----- for paying more attention to the cat than her >don't care, cat comes and sleeps next to me for the night I love my cat
Anonymous 16 KB JPG >be me 06/25/22(Sat) 16:14:58 No.69175611 >meet girl at party >take her home after hitting it off >get hot and heavy in bed >tell her I don't have any condoms >she doesn't mind, says we can just cuddle >cat comes in and sits on my dresser >immediately get up and start playing with cat >play with cat for long time >girl gets up and starts putting on her clothes >ask if shes alright >lame excuse of saying she had to be somewhere >ok then, maybe another time >go back to playing with cat >girl leaves, messages me later calling me a f----- for paying more attention to the cat than her >don't care, cat comes and sleeps next to me for the night I love my cat

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Anon gets a house | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/30/19(Fri)22:57:36 No.808404199 When your dog has something in its mouth and won't drop it 44 KB JPG >Hear footsteps >be me >get first house, real cheap but ok neighborhood >second night >Sitting at the computer in my new living room >Turnaround.mvk >Black homeless dude broke in and froze like I couldn't see him >Tell him it's fine, he's an idiot because my first house has no furniture >End up smoking all of his pot with him I had no money and he didn't stab me because he thinks I'm chill so worked out all around.
Anonymous 08/30/19(Fri)22:57:36 No.808404199 When your dog has something in its mouth and won't drop it 44 KB JPG >Hear footsteps >be me >get first house, real cheap but ok neighborhood >second night >Sitting at the computer in my new living room >Turnaround.mvk >Black homeless dude broke in and froze like I couldn't see him >Tell him it's fine, he's an idiot because my first house has no furniture >End up smoking all of his pot with him I had no money and he didn't stab me because he thinks I'm chill so worked out all around.

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Like it or not, but this guy is content and happy with his lot | /r/Greentext

Anonymous B 08/01/24(Thu)19:54:55 No.200460410 >that shy quiet guy at work who doesn't talk to anyone unless spoken to Is this you in you're c---? 82 KB JPG Anonymous Says he has no hobbies, but still lives a "busy life" Never shares his political views Knows a suspicious amount of trivial things and interesting factoids about society. Never elaborates on how he knows these things 08/01/24(Thu)19:58:56 No.200460452 You think you once heard him say something f----- up, at a social gathering, but everyone chose to ignore it. You aren't sure that it wasn't just a dream. Responds to questions with a shrug and a smile Seemingly immune to social drama Always polite Only has a few friends He could be extremely rich or poor. Impossible to say. Has never complained Always has time to help about work related problems aloof person 2.jpg 378 KB JPG Never seen in the company of a romantic partner Never wears anything flashy >>200460492 # >>200460502 # >>200460510 # >>200460528 # >>200462739
Anonymous B 08/01/24(Thu)19:54:55 No.200460410 >that shy quiet guy at work who doesn't talk to anyone unless spoken to Is this you in you're c---? 82 KB JPG Anonymous Says he has no hobbies, but still lives a "busy life" Never shares his political views Knows a suspicious amount of trivial things and interesting factoids about society. Never elaborates on how he knows these things 08/01/24(Thu)19:58:56 No.200460452 You think you once heard him say something f----- up, at a social gathering, but everyone chose to ignore it. You aren't sure that it wasn't just a dream. Responds to questions with a shrug and a smile Seemingly immune to social drama Always polite Only has a few friends He could be extremely rich or poor. Impossible to say. Has never complained Always has time to help about work related problems aloof person 2.jpg 378 KB JPG Never seen in the company of a romantic partner Never wears anything flashy >>200460492 # >>200460502 # >>200460510 # >>200460528 # >>200462739

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Anon plays Forza | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/08/2024, 00:24:35 No.16993248 30 KB JPEG > Be me > Playing Forza on hardest difficulty > "Objective: Beat Jaun" > Have multiple attempts and finally beat him > Next race > "Objective: Beat Clyde" > Takes a few attempts, but I finally beat him by one second > Next race > "Objective: Beat Holly" > Take her on the first corner and win by 17 seconds What did Microsoft mean by this?
Anonymous 03/08/2024, 00:24:35 No.16993248 30 KB JPEG > Be me > Playing Forza on hardest difficulty > "Objective: Beat Jaun" > Have multiple attempts and finally beat him > Next race > "Objective: Beat Clyde" > Takes a few attempts, but I finally beat him by one second > Next race > "Objective: Beat Holly" > Take her on the first corner and win by 17 seconds What did Microsoft mean by this?

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Honestly, sometimes it's quicker to just play the game yourself | /r/Greentext

image.png 12 KB PNG >The Best [GENRE] Game You've Never Played (2:14:57) >How [GAME] Broke Me (3:48:22) >You Don't Understand [GAME] (1:05:30) >The [GAME] Iceberg (6:37:13) >[GAME]: A Quick Retrospective (47:58:29)
image.png 12 KB PNG >The Best [GENRE] Game You've Never Played (2:14:57) >How [GAME] Broke Me (3:48:22) >You Don't Understand [GAME] (1:05:30) >The [GAME] Iceberg (6:37:13) >[GAME]: A Quick Retrospective (47:58:29)

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Nothing ever happens. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: ODle717f) 01/04/24(Thu)10:47:32 No.454019139 على طريق القدس الذكرى السنوية الراعة الاستشهار الفتاح قاسم والفتاح أبو مهدي ورفاقهما. وه كانون الثاني 2000 م بملاى الأخرة . _132199004_nasrallah.jpg 47 KB JPG >welp! You really did it this time! >Ooooooh you pesky Israelis! Your day is coming! >just... Not today... But it's coming! >Yep, we'll make you pay! Just... Not today, just to be clear >oooh Israel, you mess with the bull you get the horns... Maybe... >Urm, just.. Don't do it again please... O-Or else!!
Anonymous (ID: ODle717f) 01/04/24(Thu)10:47:32 No.454019139 على طريق القدس الذكرى السنوية الراعة الاستشهار الفتاح قاسم والفتاح أبو مهدي ورفاقهما. وه كانون الثاني 2000 م بملاى الأخرة . _132199004_nasrallah.jpg 47 KB JPG >welp! You really did it this time! >Ooooooh you pesky Israelis! Your day is coming! >just... Not today... But it's coming! >Yep, we'll make you pay! Just... Not today, just to be clear >oooh Israel, you mess with the bull you get the horns... Maybe... >Urm, just.. Don't do it again please... O-Or else!!

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Superpower by 2025 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: OPziEH2d 08/02/24(Fri)17:28:55 No.476666830 sirs.jpg 514 KB JPG >0.015% of the population in the us >somehow on BOTH presidential tickets f------ HOW?
Anonymous (ID: OPziEH2d 08/02/24(Fri)17:28:55 No.476666830 sirs.jpg 514 KB JPG >0.015% of the population in the us >somehow on BOTH presidential tickets f------ HOW?

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Gintoki was the GOAT | /r/Greentext

File: 65d04ebcf28938d05710495b7(...).jpg (28 KB, 480x360) Anonymous 08/01/24(Thu)23:30:17 No.269441483 >>269441549 >>269441590 >>269441968 >>269442913 >>269443581 >>269443613 >>269443736 >>269443847 >>269444494 >>269447548 >>269447726 >>269447811 >>269447824 >>269448265 >>269448395 >>269449031 >>269450076 >>269450122 >>269450269 >>269453942 >>269454404 >>269454567 >>269455162 >>269455705 >>269457807 >>269459852 >>269460209 >>269462261 >>269463259 >>269465811 >Doesn't end with any girl >Nobody cares, legacy remains unstained
File: 65d04ebcf28938d05710495b7(...).jpg (28 KB, 480x360) Anonymous 08/01/24(Thu)23:30:17 No.269441483 >>269441549 >>269441590 >>269441968 >>269442913 >>269443581 >>269443613 >>269443736 >>269443847 >>269444494 >>269447548 >>269447726 >>269447811 >>269447824 >>269448265 >>269448395 >>269449031 >>269450076 >>269450122 >>269450269 >>269453942 >>269454404 >>269454567 >>269455162 >>269455705 >>269457807 >>269459852 >>269460209 >>269462261 >>269463259 >>269465811 >Doesn't end with any girl >Nobody cares, legacy remains unstained

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Financial pride | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: J407bobA) 07/27/24(Sat) 11:05:06 No.475828677 Figure 3. Median Household Income for Married Couples by Age Group: 2019 (In 2019 U.S. dollars) $110,800* $104,600 $98,470* $130,700* $90,610* $85,810* $83,430* $74,370 Opposite- Same-sex Same-sex Same-sex Opposite- Same-sex sex All Female Male sex All Same-sex Same-sex Female Male 18-64 65 and over Householder age group * Difference from opposite-sex married couples is significant at the 90% confidence level. Source: U.S. Census Bureau, 2019 American Community Survey 1-year data. being gay pays.jpg 73 KB JPG >"be gay" >society awards you the most money This s--- doesn't even make sense.
Anonymous (ID: J407bobA) 07/27/24(Sat) 11:05:06 No.475828677 Figure 3. Median Household Income for Married Couples by Age Group: 2019 (In 2019 U.S. dollars) $110,800* $104,600 $98,470* $130,700* $90,610* $85,810* $83,430* $74,370 Opposite- Same-sex Same-sex Same-sex Opposite- Same-sex sex All Female Male sex All Same-sex Same-sex Female Male 18-64 65 and over Householder age group * Difference from opposite-sex married couples is significant at the 90% confidence level. Source: U.S. Census Bureau, 2019 American Community Survey 1-year data. being gay pays.jpg 73 KB JPG >"be gay" >society awards you the most money This s--- doesn't even make sense.

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