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Anon doesn't like people in wheelchairs | /r/Greentext

875189881 Anonymous 31 minutes ago frustrated-robert-downey-jr.gif (398.2 KB, 220x220) > be me > Krogering > got my haul, using self check out, register Bot bitch pissing me off > I usually start laughing WEN U TRYING NOT TO LAUGH.... when I get frustrated > hear excessively loud and escalating in tone screaming > aaaaahhhhhhAAAAAaaaaa hhhhAAAAAАAAAAAAAAАА НННННЕЕЕЕЕЕ > da f--.jpg > look around, retard in wheel chair having an episode, handler trying to calm it down > handler is probably the retards mother, she has the look of just exasperation on her face > this look says she long ago gave up actually giving a f--- and slowly plots the right time to kill her cursed abominable hell spawn > know damn well if she weren't in public she would have smacked the ever loving f--- out of the retard and locked him in the sound proof room she had specially built to house him and drown out his retarded episodes > mfw the entire time, me getting frustrated with the self check out coupled with this event that just unfolded It's OK, lads, you can let me have it, I know, I'm a terrible person.
875189881 Anonymous 31 minutes ago frustrated-robert-downey-jr.gif (398.2 KB, 220x220) > be me > Krogering > got my haul, using self check out, register Bot bitch pissing me off > I usually start laughing WEN U TRYING NOT TO LAUGH.... when I get frustrated > hear excessively loud and escalating in tone screaming > aaaaahhhhhhAAAAAaaaaa hhhhAAAAAАAAAAAAAAАА НННННЕЕЕЕЕЕ > da f--.jpg > look around, retard in wheel chair having an episode, handler trying to calm it down > handler is probably the retards mother, she has the look of just exasperation on her face > this look says she long ago gave up actually giving a f--- and slowly plots the right time to kill her cursed abominable hell spawn > know damn well if she weren't in public she would have smacked the ever loving f--- out of the retard and locked him in the sound proof room she had specially built to house him and drown out his retarded episodes > mfw the entire time, me getting frustrated with the self check out coupled with this event that just unfolded It's OK, lads, you can let me have it, I know, I'm a terrible person.

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You Would not Believe Your Eyes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)15:13:46 No.875200601 >be me >yesterday >aboard plane, I'm visiting some family the next state over >We take flight around 5 AM >Most people on the plane are asleep, and it's pitch black outside 516 KB PNG >Time passes, and we're now above the clouds >Then I see it >l see a beautiful ocean of stars >l've always lived in the city, so this is completely new to me >All while I'm listening to emotional music >l begin to tear up, I've never felt this way before >l've been through a lot these past months, so much horrible things have happened >And yet, the stars calmed me Life is beautiful, bros. It's the little things that can save you.
: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)15:13:46 No.875200601 >be me >yesterday >aboard plane, I'm visiting some family the next state over >We take flight around 5 AM >Most people on the plane are asleep, and it's pitch black outside 516 KB PNG >Time passes, and we're now above the clouds >Then I see it >l see a beautiful ocean of stars >l've always lived in the city, so this is completely new to me >All while I'm listening to emotional music >l begin to tear up, I've never felt this way before >l've been through a lot these past months, so much horrible things have happened >And yet, the stars calmed me Life is beautiful, bros. It's the little things that can save you.

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Anon relates to his abusive father | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)09:53:02 No.67956092 >Relating more and more to my abusive father What's happening to me? 499 KB PNG 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)09:55:18 No.67956107 Desu wa ne 38 KB JPG : not op 03/27/22(Sun)09:55:28 No.67956113 >>67956092 (OP) # you growing up bobby | Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)10:00:04 No.67956167 >>67956092 (OP) # My German countrymen, men and women, (long pause) Changes of Government have occurred frequently in history, and in the history of our people. It is certain, however, that never was a change of Government attended with such far- reaching results as that eight years ago. At that time the situation of the Reich was desperate. We
: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)09:53:02 No.67956092 >Relating more and more to my abusive father What's happening to me? 499 KB PNG 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)09:55:18 No.67956107 Desu wa ne 38 KB JPG : not op 03/27/22(Sun)09:55:28 No.67956113 >>67956092 (OP) # you growing up bobby | Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)10:00:04 No.67956167 >>67956092 (OP) # My German countrymen, men and women, (long pause) Changes of Government have occurred frequently in history, and in the history of our people. It is certain, however, that never was a change of Government attended with such far- reaching results as that eight years ago. At that time the situation of the Reich was desperate. We

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Anon kills his dad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/08/19(Tue)23:10:54 No.789475688 >be me >dad likes to pull pranks >has attachment to prank jump scare videos >has scared me every halloween with these 44 KB JPG >occasionally does it post/pre- halloween season >get suspicious every time i see a quiet/unassuming video >get tired of his b------- >fire vs fire.exe >july >tell him the smart tv isn't working >I really just have a black color on screen >he looks at the tv closely, inspecting >press play button on remote >video plays of typical demon girl jumping at the viewer, w/ loud screams, the whole enchilada >laughing, expecting dad to jump >look at him >he's holding his chest, and drops >he seems to writhe for a few seconds >stops moving >he had a heart attack >mfw I f------ killed him
: Anonymous 01/08/19(Tue)23:10:54 No.789475688 >be me >dad likes to pull pranks >has attachment to prank jump scare videos >has scared me every halloween with these 44 KB JPG >occasionally does it post/pre- halloween season >get suspicious every time i see a quiet/unassuming video >get tired of his b------- >fire vs fire.exe >july >tell him the smart tv isn't working >I really just have a black color on screen >he looks at the tv closely, inspecting >press play button on remote >video plays of typical demon girl jumping at the viewer, w/ loud screams, the whole enchilada >laughing, expecting dad to jump >look at him >he's holding his chest, and drops >he seems to writhe for a few seconds >stops moving >he had a heart attack >mfw I f------ killed him

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whitepilled anon | /r/Greentext

File: EbfwkU5VAAAZEN4.jpg (92 KB, 960x789) Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)16:49:24 No.67953312 [Reply] >>67955676 >was just going for a run outside >seldom do this, actually in pretty bad shape >was exhausted after 30min so i decided to walk home slowly >f--- my cardio is so bad.jpg >few meters before my place >young woman walks by >don't even notice her very much, it's already dark >i'm in my head thinking how f----- i am >now she's only few meters away >she says: "hello" and smiles >i'm overwhelmed what the f--- >say "hello" back >thinking about how she wanted to mock me in some way >do i know her? do i look stupid in my poorfag running gear? >mfw she didn't want to make fun of me and just simply was polite >mfw a young woman was polite to me and said "hello" nicely >this made me so whitepilled i was happy the whole day Guys it's insane what a smile and a simple "hello" can do. I unironically don't even hate women anymore and i think i could be at peace with society if we all treated each other like this.
File: EbfwkU5VAAAZEN4.jpg (92 KB, 960x789) Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)16:49:24 No.67953312 [Reply] >>67955676 >was just going for a run outside >seldom do this, actually in pretty bad shape >was exhausted after 30min so i decided to walk home slowly >f--- my cardio is so bad.jpg >few meters before my place >young woman walks by >don't even notice her very much, it's already dark >i'm in my head thinking how f----- i am >now she's only few meters away >she says: "hello" and smiles >i'm overwhelmed what the f--- >say "hello" back >thinking about how she wanted to mock me in some way >do i know her? do i look stupid in my poorfag running gear? >mfw she didn't want to make fun of me and just simply was polite >mfw a young woman was polite to me and said "hello" nicely >this made me so whitepilled i was happy the whole day Guys it's insane what a smile and a simple "hello" can do. I unironically don't even hate women anymore and i think i could be at peace with society if we all treated each other like this.

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Anon gives lyf hax | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/15/19(Thu)11:16:26 No.51997604 >>51997489 # >live a beautiful, strenuous life for your mom >get a well paying, respectable job >beautiful, loving wife >many happy, bright eyed children >learn new languages >get fit as f--- >learn several martial arts >make wise investments >wait for mom to die >on her deathbed she tells you how proud she is of you, and how sorry she is that she almost failed you, and she's just so happy that you turned things around THEN you can kill yourself. >>51997649 #
: Anonymous 08/15/19(Thu)11:16:26 No.51997604 >>51997489 # >live a beautiful, strenuous life for your mom >get a well paying, respectable job >beautiful, loving wife >many happy, bright eyed children >learn new languages >get fit as f--- >learn several martial arts >make wise investments >wait for mom to die >on her deathbed she tells you how proud she is of you, and how sorry she is that she almost failed you, and she's just so happy that you turned things around THEN you can kill yourself. >>51997649 #

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anon is a bad driver | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)11:31:52 No.875193303 >be me >driving >f----- rams the absolute s--- out of me >they say its my fault >they literally T-boned me >take them to court 91 KB PNG >f----- wins because im a new driver >insurance goes way the f--- up >mfw ive done nothing wrong and am now even poorer America is rigged anons
: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)11:31:52 No.875193303 >be me >driving >f----- rams the absolute s--- out of me >they say its my fault >they literally T-boned me >take them to court 91 KB PNG >f----- wins because im a new driver >insurance goes way the f--- up >mfw ive done nothing wrong and am now even poorer America is rigged anons

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Anon discovers polygamy | /r/Greentext


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Anon has a smoke | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/16/19(Wed)17:31:26 No.790143290 >waiting for bus >crowded bus stop >never smoked but curious >wanna smoke >polire stranger gives me a c-------- >light c-------- with match 6 KB JPG >throw c-------- >puff match He saw
: Anonymous 01/16/19(Wed)17:31:26 No.790143290 >waiting for bus >crowded bus stop >never smoked but curious >wanna smoke >polire stranger gives me a c-------- >light c-------- with match 6 KB JPG >throw c-------- >puff match He saw

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ISIS attacks brazil | /r/Greentext

Anonymous E 07/25/16(Mon)09:22:41 No.62566238 >>62566282 62566312 p62566465 >>62565179 >>62565223 >ISIS decides to attack Brazil >bombers get mugged on the way to the stadium, suicide vests and phone detonators stolen >decide to r--- some infidels out of anger >pin down and r--- the first woman they see >it's a cross dresser >absolutely haram >desperately try to save some face by shooting up a school or a restaurant or something >there's already a gun battle going on when they get there >they go back to middle east angry and defeated >turns out they got Zika from r----- the t----- >it spreads and wipes out ISIS
Anonymous E 07/25/16(Mon)09:22:41 No.62566238 >>62566282 62566312 p62566465 >>62565179 >>62565223 >ISIS decides to attack Brazil >bombers get mugged on the way to the stadium, suicide vests and phone detonators stolen >decide to r--- some infidels out of anger >pin down and r--- the first woman they see >it's a cross dresser >absolutely haram >desperately try to save some face by shooting up a school or a restaurant or something >there's already a gun battle going on when they get there >they go back to middle east angry and defeated >turns out they got Zika from r----- the t----- >it spreads and wipes out ISIS

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Anon is rich | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)15:51:20 No.875179643 >be me, 30yr old loser >gf is broke 23yr and 10/10 >gf mad and broke up with me a month ago >edit my crypto account to make it look like im rich and 47 KB JPG screenshot it >"accidentaly" show her >she thinks im rich >suddenly all problems go away and she apologizes for everything >get sex every day >starts sending me pictures of baby clothes and eventually says she has baby fever >she wants me to impregnate her and stops taking birth control I dont know what to do now because I only have like 15k to my name and she thinks Im rich, but im taking advantage of this great p---- for as long as it lasts
: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)15:51:20 No.875179643 >be me, 30yr old loser >gf is broke 23yr and 10/10 >gf mad and broke up with me a month ago >edit my crypto account to make it look like im rich and 47 KB JPG screenshot it >"accidentaly" show her >she thinks im rich >suddenly all problems go away and she apologizes for everything >get sex every day >starts sending me pictures of baby clothes and eventually says she has baby fever >she wants me to impregnate her and stops taking birth control I dont know what to do now because I only have like 15k to my name and she thinks Im rich, but im taking advantage of this great p---- for as long as it lasts

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Anon the smooth criminal | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/05/22(Sat)19:49:23 No.17512998 >Hate fast food BURGER KING >Not even American >But the cute redhead working the drive thru always warms my heart Looks like it'll be another Double Steakhouse® without tomatoes 76 KB JPG for me boys. Once i have my new car i'll ask her out. >Hey, without tomatoes as usual? >Yeah, cus' you're the only red thing i'd need on my burger heh! : Anonymous 03/05/22(Sat)19:51:31 No.17513004 >>17512998 (OP) # don't use that line. >>17513010 #
: Anonymous 03/05/22(Sat)19:49:23 No.17512998 >Hate fast food BURGER KING >Not even American >But the cute redhead working the drive thru always warms my heart Looks like it'll be another Double Steakhouse® without tomatoes 76 KB JPG for me boys. Once i have my new car i'll ask her out. >Hey, without tomatoes as usual? >Yeah, cus' you're the only red thing i'd need on my burger heh! : Anonymous 03/05/22(Sat)19:51:31 No.17513004 >>17512998 (OP) # don't use that line. >>17513010 #

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Anon is a dreamer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/06/19(Tue)00:40:07 No.119151659 >it's another "teeth falls out of your mouth" dream episode 201 KB PNG :Anonymous 08/06/19(Tue)03:08:47 No.119155050 >>119151659 (OP) # The other day I had a dream that I could suck my own d--- but then I accidentally choked on it and died 64 KB JPG >>119155083 >119155341 : Anonymou Anonymous 08/06/19(Tue)03:24:37 No.119155341 :Anonymou »119155050 # A modern Icarus : Anonymou
: Anonymous 08/06/19(Tue)00:40:07 No.119151659 >it's another "teeth falls out of your mouth" dream episode 201 KB PNG :Anonymous 08/06/19(Tue)03:08:47 No.119155050 >>119151659 (OP) # The other day I had a dream that I could suck my own d--- but then I accidentally choked on it and died 64 KB JPG >>119155083 >119155341 : Anonymou Anonymous 08/06/19(Tue)03:24:37 No.119155341 :Anonymou »119155050 # A modern Icarus : Anonymou

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redtextthispost | /r/Greentext

>Be me >Colorblind >Decide to make greentext >How did I do guys
>Be me >Colorblind >Decide to make greentext >How did I do guys

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I'm not gay, but... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/17/18(Tue)09:04:05 No.766096427 Transgender Finds Love With The Man Who Rejected Her As A Male LAUGHOFF Transgender Finds Love With The Man Who Rejected Her As A Male - iRediT Screenshot 20180416-185733.png 1.07 MB PNG "wanna go on a date?" "I ain't gay" "What if I grow some t--- and grow my hair out?" %3D "...fine" ...
: Anonymous 04/17/18(Tue)09:04:05 No.766096427 Transgender Finds Love With The Man Who Rejected Her As A Male LAUGHOFF Transgender Finds Love With The Man Who Rejected Her As A Male - iRediT Screenshot 20180416-185733.png 1.07 MB PNG "wanna go on a date?" "I ain't gay" "What if I grow some t--- and grow my hair out?" %3D "...fine" ...

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Bill the great | /r/Greentext

File: first black president.jpg (11 KB, 480x360) Anonymous (ID: tOWidatY [Reply] > 02/06/18(Tue)23:25:28 No.159548327 >played jazz sax >could reliably hoop a free throw >ordered fried chicken on every Airforce One flight >almost lost his job over some phat white ass Was Bill Clinton the first black president?
File: first black president.jpg (11 KB, 480x360) Anonymous (ID: tOWidatY [Reply] > 02/06/18(Tue)23:25:28 No.159548327 >played jazz sax >could reliably hoop a free throw >ordered fried chicken on every Airforce One flight >almost lost his job over some phat white ass Was Bill Clinton the first black president?

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Anon uses his cards right | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)14:25:55 No.87518138: >>875175338 >Be me >5'1" >Take the dwarf pill >Grow long hair and a beard >Start worshiping Norse gods II 137 KВ ЈPG >Start blacksmithing and silversmithing >Get Nordic Tattoos >End up with qt3.14 4'11" redhead >Life is good You gotta use the cards you got anon.
: Anonymous 03/27/22(Sun)14:25:55 No.87518138: >>875175338 >Be me >5'1" >Take the dwarf pill >Grow long hair and a beard >Start worshiping Norse gods II 137 KВ ЈPG >Start blacksmithing and silversmithing >Get Nordic Tattoos >End up with qt3.14 4'11" redhead >Life is good You gotta use the cards you got anon.

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Anon is a bit autistic | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/05/22(Sat)07:25:32 No.873847000 1mydq3.jpg 51 KB JPG >go on tinder date last night >seemingly normal girl >decide to go get coffee pretty late >sit down >I ask "so what do you do for a living?" >"so I actually don't have a job right now because advocating takes up a huge part of my time, I'm a huge proponent for social justice, mainly online." Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck
: Anonymous 03/05/22(Sat)07:25:32 No.873847000 1mydq3.jpg 51 KB JPG >go on tinder date last night >seemingly normal girl >decide to go get coffee pretty late >sit down >I ask "so what do you do for a living?" >"so I actually don't have a job right now because advocating takes up a huge part of my time, I'm a huge proponent for social justice, mainly online." Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck

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Anon wonders... | /r/Greentext

Indiana-Jones-smirk-e1546299380834.jpg| 64 KB JPG >sacred artifact of the Jews is full of demons and melts your face off >the cup of Christ allows you to live forever and heals all injuries What did Lucas mean by this?
Indiana-Jones-smirk-e1546299380834.jpg| 64 KB JPG >sacred artifact of the Jews is full of demons and melts your face off >the cup of Christ allows you to live forever and heals all injuries What did Lucas mean by this?

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Gabe announces Half Life 3 | /r/Greentext

File: 1338794837362 jpg-(155 KB, 800x1200, Gabe_01.jpg) O Anonymous 06/04/12(Mon)03:27 No.141846848 >Gabe comes onto stage >Talks about new Steam features, Dota 2 >Conference is coming to a close >Audience sighs in unison >"Oh and one more thing" >"Attendees perk up >A huge f------ 3 slowly fades onto screen >Crowd turns into bananas and bursts into treats >An "E" quickly pops up next to it >"Have a nice E3" >Gabe gets shot
File: 1338794837362 jpg-(155 KB, 800x1200, Gabe_01.jpg) O Anonymous 06/04/12(Mon)03:27 No.141846848 >Gabe comes onto stage >Talks about new Steam features, Dota 2 >Conference is coming to a close >Audience sighs in unison >"Oh and one more thing" >"Attendees perk up >A huge f------ 3 slowly fades onto screen >Crowd turns into bananas and bursts into treats >An "E" quickly pops up next to it >"Have a nice E3" >Gabe gets shot

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