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Anon's an e-girl | /r/Greentext

>be me >be bored >create fake profile as a 15 year old girl >use photos of myself dressed as a trap >lure pedos > TCAP. exe >one of them actually falls in love with my pics > calls me his "pretty lady" >idea. mp3 Well daddy the why don't you send your pretty lady some cash through pay pal so i can send u more pics >he complies >mfw he sends 50 bucks >mfw im an e girl
>be me >be bored >create fake profile as a 15 year old girl >use photos of myself dressed as a trap >lure pedos > TCAP. exe >one of them actually falls in love with my pics > calls me his "pretty lady" >idea. mp3 Well daddy the why don't you send your pretty lady some cash through pay pal so i can send u more pics >he complies >mfw he sends 50 bucks >mfw im an e girl

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>1000 hours on 4chan >not recommended | /r/Greentext

File: hqdefault jpg (10 KB, 480x360) O Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:55:32 >>442641520 >>442641738 >>442641745 >>4421 >1000-3000 hours on record >not recommended Not Recommended 2,343.0 hrs on record Why do people do this? Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:56 12 Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09 56: 16 Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:56 >>442640492 (OP) >1000-3000 hours on heroin >not recommended > Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09 57:08 No 442640595 > Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:57:09 No 442640597 >> Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:57:36 No.442640620 Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:57:40 No.442640627 Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09 57:57 No.442640639 >442640960 >>442642330 I lived for 30 years and i would not recommend living
File: hqdefault jpg (10 KB, 480x360) O Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:55:32 >>442641520 >>442641738 >>442641745 >>4421 >1000-3000 hours on record >not recommended Not Recommended 2,343.0 hrs on record Why do people do this? Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:56 12 Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09 56: 16 Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:56 >>442640492 (OP) >1000-3000 hours on heroin >not recommended > Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09 57:08 No 442640595 > Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:57:09 No 442640597 >> Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:57:36 No.442640620 Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09:57:40 No.442640627 Anonymous 12/12/18(Wed)09 57:57 No.442640639 >442640960 >>442642330 I lived for 30 years and i would not recommend living

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Anon is a burger flipper. | /r/Greentext


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Anon gets older | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/09/22(Wed)00:09:00 No.874066931 >be me 22 years old a few years ago >had sex a few times with 18-19 y/o sluts >had been wanting to get married now that I had sex >don't wanna f--- sluts anymore >now I don't want casual sex, just marriage >now Im 27 13 KB JPG >see some of my friends got married >they invite me to their house >see their roastie wives that let themselves go or become roastie looking >they're 26-29 and already look like they're in their late 30's >imagine myself having the same roastie wife for the rest of my life >get disgusted >don't want to get married or even have sex anymore >l'm quenched Now what do I do?
Anonymous 03/09/22(Wed)00:09:00 No.874066931 >be me 22 years old a few years ago >had sex a few times with 18-19 y/o sluts >had been wanting to get married now that I had sex >don't wanna f--- sluts anymore >now I don't want casual sex, just marriage >now Im 27 13 KB JPG >see some of my friends got married >they invite me to their house >see their roastie wives that let themselves go or become roastie looking >they're 26-29 and already look like they're in their late 30's >imagine myself having the same roastie wife for the rest of my life >get disgusted >don't want to get married or even have sex anymore >l'm quenched Now what do I do?

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Anon cannot commit | /r/Greentext

>>48408831 # My great uncle, uncle, cousin, and dad all killed themselves with the same .22 revolver and another uncle was shot and paralyzed with it while playing with it as a kid. The kid that accidentally shot him was so terrified of what his dad would do when he found out he went home and hung himself with a belt. My brother and me both wanted it but the police released it to our stepmom and she won't give it up. >tfw l'll never be able to kill myself with the family suicide gun >>48409514 # >>48409556 # >>48409648 # >>48409926 # >>48409998 # >>48410321 # >>48410548 # >>48410605 # >>48410685 # >>48412747 # >>48415294 #
>>48408831 # My great uncle, uncle, cousin, and dad all killed themselves with the same .22 revolver and another uncle was shot and paralyzed with it while playing with it as a kid. The kid that accidentally shot him was so terrified of what his dad would do when he found out he went home and hung himself with a belt. My brother and me both wanted it but the police released it to our stepmom and she won't give it up. >tfw l'll never be able to kill myself with the family suicide gun >>48409514 # >>48409556 # >>48409648 # >>48409926 # >>48409998 # >>48410321 # >>48410548 # >>48410605 # >>48410685 # >>48412747 # >>48415294 #

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Anon is a redditor | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/09/22(Wed)01:08:40 No.874069421 >find r/greentext on Reddit >think it's funny >wanna check out 4chan >go to /b/ >mfw it's all p--- >literally nothing other than p--- >what the f--- 60 KB GIF
Anonymous 03/09/22(Wed)01:08:40 No.874069421 >find r/greentext on Reddit >think it's funny >wanna check out 4chan >go to /b/ >mfw it's all p--- >literally nothing other than p--- >what the f--- 60 KB GIF

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Anon just wants to play | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/09/22(Wed)00:18:06 No.24783730 >be me (m,23) >An old friend I haven't seen in two years hits me up >quite effeminate, give a few years and he will come out as trans l bet >Meet at a Hipster Café >He tells me that he is vegan now and he got into knitting 90 KB JPG >Blur out "Haha pretty fembrained" >looks at me in confusion >Asks me with the most forced smile "Anon, what are you talking about" >Explain him what based,fembrained, seethe and cope mean >Changes subject >"Anon you know my friend makes fun of me cause I have small soft hands, lets compare them!" >Touches my hand >"Haha your hands are so big and rough" >Look at him "Ye they are, cope and seethe lol" >Skip to night time >"Today was fun anon, I just moved to this City a few months ago, would you mind tag along and show me how I get home from this Café?" >"Na, bro, wanted to play EldenRing the whole day, just take the tram" Come home realise what I did, am I actually autistic?
: Anonymous 03/09/22(Wed)00:18:06 No.24783730 >be me (m,23) >An old friend I haven't seen in two years hits me up >quite effeminate, give a few years and he will come out as trans l bet >Meet at a Hipster Café >He tells me that he is vegan now and he got into knitting 90 KB JPG >Blur out "Haha pretty fembrained" >looks at me in confusion >Asks me with the most forced smile "Anon, what are you talking about" >Explain him what based,fembrained, seethe and cope mean >Changes subject >"Anon you know my friend makes fun of me cause I have small soft hands, lets compare them!" >Touches my hand >"Haha your hands are so big and rough" >Look at him "Ye they are, cope and seethe lol" >Skip to night time >"Today was fun anon, I just moved to this City a few months ago, would you mind tag along and show me how I get home from this Café?" >"Na, bro, wanted to play EldenRing the whole day, just take the tram" Come home realise what I did, am I actually autistic?

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Anon knows a conman | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)06:14:02 No.45788431 >artist who I f------ know is Brazilian changes his location to Ukraine >opens "emergency" commissions >gets flooded with work M----------- >>45788448 # >>45788531 # >>45788538 # >>45788552 #
: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)06:14:02 No.45788431 >artist who I f------ know is Brazilian changes his location to Ukraine >opens "emergency" commissions >gets flooded with work M----------- >>45788448 # >>45788531 # >>45788538 # >>45788552 #

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Anon does a little bit of trolling | /r/Greentext


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Anon goes to an event | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/15/17(Fri)22:28:01 No.9722834 >feel bad for a lonely guy in my class >invite him to a cosplay event >he shows up dressed as Fred Flintstone in blackface >he keeps screaming "I yabba dabba dindu nuffin!" 252 KB JPG This was a f------ mistake.
Anonymous 12/15/17(Fri)22:28:01 No.9722834 >feel bad for a lonely guy in my class >invite him to a cosplay event >he shows up dressed as Fred Flintstone in blackface >he keeps screaming "I yabba dabba dindu nuffin!" 252 KB JPG This was a f------ mistake.

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Anon is German | /r/Greentext

:Anonymous 11/13/20(Fri)13:00:34 No.133998503 > be me > been in love with this wonderful girl for over 16 years now > made a son this august > fills my grey heart with colors unseen > suddenly feel more connected to everyone else > this world is a f------ miracle 70 KB JPG Life is the most beautiful thing, my fellow anons. Don't let yourself be consumed by malice. Good luck to you!
:Anonymous 11/13/20(Fri)13:00:34 No.133998503 > be me > been in love with this wonderful girl for over 16 years now > made a son this august > fills my grey heart with colors unseen > suddenly feel more connected to everyone else > this world is a f------ miracle 70 KB JPG Life is the most beautiful thing, my fellow anons. Don't let yourself be consumed by malice. Good luck to you!

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I love you, gay bowser | /r/Greentext

Ifit/ Anonymous WHY AM I SO F------ AUTISTIC /(...) 12/25/20(Fri)21:07:31 No.59039844 >Be me >starting to go to the gym in 2019 >never talk to anyone in there because too autistic >one day i go to the coffee machine, a girl start talking to me, we keep talking and i notice her 10 KB JPG Mario T-shirt >mfw she tells me she is a nintendofag >im happy, we keep talking and over time we get really close to each other, but im too f------ autistic to do the first step >one day she f------ tells me to come with her at home >i stare her for like 20 seconds, i don't know what to say >my autism kicks in >i scream "here we go! i need to save the princess, let's go ! *with a italian accent* >she ask me if im serious ? ( everyone looked at us because i screamed ) >i notice that everyone is looking at me >i scream "Oh mama mia wahahahaha yaahooooo" and run out
Ifit/ Anonymous WHY AM I SO F------ AUTISTIC /(...) 12/25/20(Fri)21:07:31 No.59039844 >Be me >starting to go to the gym in 2019 >never talk to anyone in there because too autistic >one day i go to the coffee machine, a girl start talking to me, we keep talking and i notice her 10 KB JPG Mario T-shirt >mfw she tells me she is a nintendofag >im happy, we keep talking and over time we get really close to each other, but im too f------ autistic to do the first step >one day she f------ tells me to come with her at home >i stare her for like 20 seconds, i don't know what to say >my autism kicks in >i scream "here we go! i need to save the princess, let's go ! *with a italian accent* >she ask me if im serious ? ( everyone looked at us because i screamed ) >i notice that everyone is looking at me >i scream "Oh mama mia wahahahaha yaahooooo" and run out

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Anon is a trap | /r/Greentext

vsg8tr36c21.png (181 KB, 600x600) google yandex iqdb wait O Anonymous 04/16/19(Tue)21 >be me >15yo /bl-addicted male >straight >discover trap hentai feelsgodman.png >try on dress as a joke ohno.wav >enjoy it way too much >develop fetish for cross-dressing >be me >16y trap >in public, full trap outfit >two guys catcall me >laugh it off >actually get major hard-on itsnotgay.jpg >be me now >in 3-yr relationship with another guy >dress as a trap almost daily >moral of the story: 4chan made me a gay trap, /b/ros. you're next.
vsg8tr36c21.png (181 KB, 600x600) google yandex iqdb wait O Anonymous 04/16/19(Tue)21 >be me >15yo /bl-addicted male >straight >discover trap hentai feelsgodman.png >try on dress as a joke ohno.wav >enjoy it way too much >develop fetish for cross-dressing >be me >16y trap >in public, full trap outfit >two guys catcall me >laugh it off >actually get major hard-on itsnotgay.jpg >be me now >in 3-yr relationship with another guy >dress as a trap almost daily >moral of the story: 4chan made me a gay trap, /b/ros. you're next.

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Ye olde switcheroo | /r/Greentext

No.40240487 16 minutes ago PNG 136.6 KiB 1631x1571 >It's the police. Open up! >Go to the door, start knocking and say "It's the police. Open up!" >We're serious, stop joking around! >reply with "It's the police. Open up!" >lf you do not comply we will break down the door. >reply with "It's the police. Open up!" >This is the last warning, open up now or we will breech the door. >Take my sledgehammer and smash down my own door, proceed to arrest the 4 policemen for not opening the door.
No.40240487 16 minutes ago PNG 136.6 KiB 1631x1571 >It's the police. Open up! >Go to the door, start knocking and say "It's the police. Open up!" >We're serious, stop joking around! >reply with "It's the police. Open up!" >lf you do not comply we will break down the door. >reply with "It's the police. Open up!" >This is the last warning, open up now or we will breech the door. >Take my sledgehammer and smash down my own door, proceed to arrest the 4 policemen for not opening the door.

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Anon find a girlfriend | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 15 minutes ago 861882794 >first time spending the night with new gf >wake up to the sound of her crying and a cold wet feeling from her side of the bed >She starts profusely apologizing to me >apparently she's a bedwetter >usually wears diapers to bed and has plastic mattress covers but was too embarrassed to use them with me here >starts rambling about how it's cuz her uncle abused her and s--- >just try to calm her down and tell her it's ok >she finally calms down and thanks me for being so understanding >next night she puts on a diaper and puts a cover on the bed >notice her get up at least twice in the night to change diapers What the f--- have I gotten myself into guys. 2 REPLIES Anonymous 12 minutes ago 861882911 >>861882794 (OP) include me in the screenshot
Anonymous 15 minutes ago 861882794 >first time spending the night with new gf >wake up to the sound of her crying and a cold wet feeling from her side of the bed >She starts profusely apologizing to me >apparently she's a bedwetter >usually wears diapers to bed and has plastic mattress covers but was too embarrassed to use them with me here >starts rambling about how it's cuz her uncle abused her and s--- >just try to calm her down and tell her it's ok >she finally calms down and thanks me for being so understanding >next night she puts on a diaper and puts a cover on the bed >notice her get up at least twice in the night to change diapers What the f--- have I gotten myself into guys. 2 REPLIES Anonymous 12 minutes ago 861882911 >>861882794 (OP) include me in the screenshot

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Anon did his part | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/09/22(Wed)02:34:21 No.874073031 CRYING >be me, average american >sitting on my couch watching tv >billionaire kicks in my door >l am frozen with patriotic awe TEARS OF JOY >slaps my bud light out of my hand >f---- my wife on the couch next to me 24 KB JPG >wipes his d--- on the curtains >l manage to squeak out "thank you for your service" >he towers over me like a titan of industry >pisses on my face while screaming "TRICKLE DOWN" >I clap and tip him 20% >he twists my n------ while asking if l'm “a union man" >tell him proudly that I'm a rugged individualist like him >he seems pleased >breaks a window to create more jobs and flies away truly this is the greatest country in the world
: Anonymous 03/09/22(Wed)02:34:21 No.874073031 CRYING >be me, average american >sitting on my couch watching tv >billionaire kicks in my door >l am frozen with patriotic awe TEARS OF JOY >slaps my bud light out of my hand >f---- my wife on the couch next to me 24 KB JPG >wipes his d--- on the curtains >l manage to squeak out "thank you for your service" >he towers over me like a titan of industry >pisses on my face while screaming "TRICKLE DOWN" >I clap and tip him 20% >he twists my n------ while asking if l'm “a union man" >tell him proudly that I'm a rugged individualist like him >he seems pleased >breaks a window to create more jobs and flies away truly this is the greatest country in the world

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Anon got traumatized | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: SlaHPBol 10/18/21(Mon)03:45:44 No.343857219 DBFED151-46D5-49AB-A6E1-721FFA5A5D80.jpg 28 KB JPG >>343850230 (OP) # I'm 23 and I overheard a group of teenage girls laughing at me for wearing wired earphones today what the f---
: Anonymous (ID: SlaHPBol 10/18/21(Mon)03:45:44 No.343857219 DBFED151-46D5-49AB-A6E1-721FFA5A5D80.jpg 28 KB JPG >>343850230 (OP) # I'm 23 and I overheard a group of teenage girls laughing at me for wearing wired earphones today what the f---

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10 Gallon hat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/12/19(Tue)09:02:21 No.123956570 >At cinema >cowboy with 10 gallon hat sits in front of me >ask him to take off hat >head is the same size and shape as the hat 12 KB GIF
: Anonymous 11/12/19(Tue)09:02:21 No.123956570 >At cinema >cowboy with 10 gallon hat sits in front of me >ask him to take off hat >head is the same size and shape as the hat 12 KB GIF

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Anon is living a comedy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/08/22(Tue)01:14:04 No.874012031 >went to hang myself >forgot to bring something to stand on >couldn't climb the tree >slammed my head on the top of my car as i went to leave I cant even make this s--- up. It's like I'm living the worst comedy ever written. I 100 KB PNG f------ hate existing. : Anonymous 03/08/22(Tue)01:18:46 No.874012217 >>874012031 (OP)_# Holy f------ kek anon, you gotta turn that into a sketch or something. HHHHHH 58 KB PNG >>874012457 #
: Anonymous 03/08/22(Tue)01:14:04 No.874012031 >went to hang myself >forgot to bring something to stand on >couldn't climb the tree >slammed my head on the top of my car as i went to leave I cant even make this s--- up. It's like I'm living the worst comedy ever written. I 100 KB PNG f------ hate existing. : Anonymous 03/08/22(Tue)01:18:46 No.874012217 >>874012031 (OP)_# Holy f------ kek anon, you gotta turn that into a sketch or something. HHHHHH 58 KB PNG >>874012457 #

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Anon sees a horror movie | /r/Greentext


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