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Anon preaches truth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: xphr6pDr 02/26/22(Sat)00:03:59 No.363276688 How the f--- did we even enter this timeline? 54 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: TdgXv8Ru 02/26/22(Sat)00:04:50 No.363276898 >>363289134 # : Anonymous (ID: BK5MİZAD 02/26/22(Sat)00:08:34 No.363277792 >>363276688(OP) # Harambe >>363277917 # >>363278593 # >>363278703 # >>363279999 >>363289202 #
: Anonymous (ID: xphr6pDr 02/26/22(Sat)00:03:59 No.363276688 How the f--- did we even enter this timeline? 54 KB JPG : Anonymous (ID: TdgXv8Ru 02/26/22(Sat)00:04:50 No.363276898 >>363289134 # : Anonymous (ID: BK5MİZAD 02/26/22(Sat)00:08:34 No.363277792 >>363276688(OP) # Harambe >>363277917 # >>363278593 # >>363278703 # >>363279999 >>363289202 #

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Ukraine's True Secret Weapon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: FVTbi9q9 ) 02/25/22(Fri)13:31:28 No.363200924 obraz_2022-02-25_133028.png 45 KB PNG >>363200545 # The real ghost of Kiev
: Anonymous (ID: FVTbi9q9 ) 02/25/22(Fri)13:31:28 No.363200924 obraz_2022-02-25_133028.png 45 KB PNG >>363200545 # The real ghost of Kiev

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Anon makes a recovery | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/06/19(Sun)20:52:24 No.789321110 >be me, 23yo, shy c--- >spent three years in a toxic relationship being constantly emotionally abused >ex dumped me for some swaggot couple years back because he was a f------- and got bored of me >apparently ended poorly (who would've thought?) 11 KB JPG >texted me some time back that she missed me and how I always treated her well and pampered her and how she's sorry fuckthatnoise.mp3 >left her on read and moved on, still feeling a bunch of inner turmoil >ran into her at local market today >she came up to me (even though I did my best to avoid her) >tries initiating conversation >something inside me gets ignited >"I'm sorry, do I know you?" >she's confused and goes "are you f------ kidding, it's me, xxxxxx" >"Ooh, s---, I didn't recognize you! THAT'S what you look like now? Talk about dodging a f------ bullet." >l walk off without saying anything else to her >saw her walking out bawling her eyes out >I feel closure and empowerment, anons >I think I'm ready for the dating scene again
: Anonymous 01/06/19(Sun)20:52:24 No.789321110 >be me, 23yo, shy c--- >spent three years in a toxic relationship being constantly emotionally abused >ex dumped me for some swaggot couple years back because he was a f------- and got bored of me >apparently ended poorly (who would've thought?) 11 KB JPG >texted me some time back that she missed me and how I always treated her well and pampered her and how she's sorry fuckthatnoise.mp3 >left her on read and moved on, still feeling a bunch of inner turmoil >ran into her at local market today >she came up to me (even though I did my best to avoid her) >tries initiating conversation >something inside me gets ignited >"I'm sorry, do I know you?" >she's confused and goes "are you f------ kidding, it's me, xxxxxx" >"Ooh, s---, I didn't recognize you! THAT'S what you look like now? Talk about dodging a f------ bullet." >l walk off without saying anything else to her >saw her walking out bawling her eyes out >I feel closure and empowerment, anons >I think I'm ready for the dating scene again

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Anon is a historian. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 6lrNIHp6 ) EE 02/25/22(Fri)13:25:57 No.363210781 >be russia >claim to re-establish soviet union >claim to have a super power army >invade the crippled neighbour next door >??? 537 KB PNG >abt 2000 losses in two days and failing almost all of their objectives Jesus f--- how can Russia and vatniks f--- up so bad? I mean Putin most cope right now and he even wants to start peace talk in Minsk.
: Anonymous (ID: 6lrNIHp6 ) EE 02/25/22(Fri)13:25:57 No.363210781 >be russia >claim to re-establish soviet union >claim to have a super power army >invade the crippled neighbour next door >??? 537 KB PNG >abt 2000 losses in two days and failing almost all of their objectives Jesus f--- how can Russia and vatniks f--- up so bad? I mean Putin most cope right now and he even wants to start peace talk in Minsk.

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Anon is a prankster | /r/Greentext

>Call my local bowling alley >"Do you have 30 lb balls? I can't really lift/throw anything heavier." >"Yes we do have 30 lb balls." >"THEN HOW DO YOU WALK!?!" >Hang up the phone НАНАНАНАНАНАНАНА
>Call my local bowling alley >"Do you have 30 lb balls? I can't really lift/throw anything heavier." >"Yes we do have 30 lb balls." >"THEN HOW DO YOU WALK!?!" >Hang up the phone НАНАНАНАНАНАНАНА

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Anon copes and seethes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)13:12:55 No.65711497 >>65711465 # >you will never princess carry a tomboy while she lightly punches you in the shoulders and calls you lame >you will never be hanging out with a tomboy when a storm hits and find out she's cripplingly terrified of 557 KB JPG thunder >you will never get /fit/ with a tomboy >you will never go to the track meet/swim meet/softball game/football game/judo match of your tomboy gf and cheer her on as she kicks everyone's ass, then have her run into the stands to hug you after she wins and tell you she knew she had to do her best when she saw you in the stands >you will never help a tomboy study for her big test so she gets a good enough grade to stay on the team >a tomboy will never attempt to cook for you and f--- it all up becaue she's never cooked in her life but you eat it anyways just to see her smile >you will never coerce a tomboy into wearing a frilly, girly dress and watch as she squirms around all self- conscious and shy >>65711591 # >>65711837 # >>65711874 # >>65712178 #
: Anonymous 02/25/22(Fri)13:12:55 No.65711497 >>65711465 # >you will never princess carry a tomboy while she lightly punches you in the shoulders and calls you lame >you will never be hanging out with a tomboy when a storm hits and find out she's cripplingly terrified of 557 KB JPG thunder >you will never get /fit/ with a tomboy >you will never go to the track meet/swim meet/softball game/football game/judo match of your tomboy gf and cheer her on as she kicks everyone's ass, then have her run into the stands to hug you after she wins and tell you she knew she had to do her best when she saw you in the stands >you will never help a tomboy study for her big test so she gets a good enough grade to stay on the team >a tomboy will never attempt to cook for you and f--- it all up becaue she's never cooked in her life but you eat it anyways just to see her smile >you will never coerce a tomboy into wearing a frilly, girly dress and watch as she squirms around all self- conscious and shy >>65711591 # >>65711837 # >>65711874 # >>65712178 #

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Anon makes a request | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)23:01:05 No.848384941 hey can you guys watch my milk for me, I gotta step out for a minute >> U Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)23:04:49 No.848385185 File: 2021-02-26.png (464 KB, 640x610) >>848385697 Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)23:13:36 No.848385697 File: sade jpg (67 KB, 1024x962) >>848385185 y drink milk? he say watch it no drink pls
Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)23:01:05 No.848384941 hey can you guys watch my milk for me, I gotta step out for a minute >> U Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)23:04:49 No.848385185 File: 2021-02-26.png (464 KB, 640x610) >>848385697 Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)23:13:36 No.848385697 File: sade jpg (67 KB, 1024x962) >>848385185 y drink milk? he say watch it no drink pls

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Anon gets put in place | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/27/19(Sat)08:24:41 No.53599618 >be me in highschool >one day the teacher asks the class what album or song he should play >most of the class asked him to play lil pump or BTS or whatever s--- to have the teacher play >teacher picks me and I say Master of Puppets album from Metallica >he plays it and the entire class is saying to pick 73 KB JPG something else >MFW I'm the only one that enjoys rock and metal music of my class >MFW everyone is saying that it's garbage : Anonymous 07/27/19(Sat)08:28:12 No.53599650 >>53599618 (OP) # Yeah you were born in the wrong generation huh? Take your boomer rock and f--- off to the nursing home. >>53599805 #
: Anonymous 07/27/19(Sat)08:24:41 No.53599618 >be me in highschool >one day the teacher asks the class what album or song he should play >most of the class asked him to play lil pump or BTS or whatever s--- to have the teacher play >teacher picks me and I say Master of Puppets album from Metallica >he plays it and the entire class is saying to pick 73 KB JPG something else >MFW I'm the only one that enjoys rock and metal music of my class >MFW everyone is saying that it's garbage : Anonymous 07/27/19(Sat)08:28:12 No.53599650 >>53599618 (OP) # Yeah you were born in the wrong generation huh? Take your boomer rock and f--- off to the nursing home. >>53599805 #

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Anon is a schizo | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous F--- LIFE 02/24/22(Thu)20:56:06 No.67566098 I just realized i had bad luck >Grew up with schizophrenic mom >grew up with schizophrenic website (4chan) 73 KB JPG 3 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 02/24/22(Thu)20:57:02 No.67566106 >hes just now realizing >>67566157 # : Anonymous 02/24/22(Thu)20:58:25 No.67566115 >>67566098 (OP) # >schizophrenic sees everyone around him as being the "true schizophrenics" Many such cases, SAD!
: Anonymous F--- LIFE 02/24/22(Thu)20:56:06 No.67566098 I just realized i had bad luck >Grew up with schizophrenic mom >grew up with schizophrenic website (4chan) 73 KB JPG 3 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 02/24/22(Thu)20:57:02 No.67566106 >hes just now realizing >>67566157 # : Anonymous 02/24/22(Thu)20:58:25 No.67566115 >>67566098 (OP) # >schizophrenic sees everyone around him as being the "true schizophrenics" Many such cases, SAD!

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Anon has dating advice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/24/19(Sun)20:12:58 No.55496843 why don't you just date an attractive woman? >pleasant to look at >sex is better >will make you happier and more confident 58 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/24/19(Sun)20:14:27 No.55496858 Why the f--- didn't I think of this, thanks OP >>55496890 #
: Anonymous 11/24/19(Sun)20:12:58 No.55496843 why don't you just date an attractive woman? >pleasant to look at >sex is better >will make you happier and more confident 58 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/24/19(Sun)20:14:27 No.55496858 Why the f--- didn't I think of this, thanks OP >>55496890 #

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Anon is based af | /r/Greentext


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Anon is a weeb | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: PcQCMvkk ) EE 02/24/22(Thu)18:11:40 No.363047890 T TIME China's Alliance With Putin on Ukraine Confirms US Fears | Time 38 KB JPG IT'S OVER FOR MUTTS. No more trannies. No more bbc p---. No more race mixing. No more sucking d----. No more pride parades. No more LGBTQ+. No more prancing around in dresses. No more degeneracy. China and Russia are starting a New World Order and your vile degenerate mutt ways are not welcome. Anonymous (ID: NOXLRUQ8 ) I 02/24/22(Thu)18:27:35 No.363051903 >>363047890 (OP) >but the anime?
Anonymous (ID: PcQCMvkk ) EE 02/24/22(Thu)18:11:40 No.363047890 T TIME China's Alliance With Putin on Ukraine Confirms US Fears | Time 38 KB JPG IT'S OVER FOR MUTTS. No more trannies. No more bbc p---. No more race mixing. No more sucking d----. No more pride parades. No more LGBTQ+. No more prancing around in dresses. No more degeneracy. China and Russia are starting a New World Order and your vile degenerate mutt ways are not welcome. Anonymous (ID: NOXLRUQ8 ) I 02/24/22(Thu)18:27:35 No.363051903 >>363047890 (OP) >but the anime?

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Anon has made it | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Inflection point: Should I bec(...) 07/05/21(Mon)22:05:02 No.64455881 >27 yo >khvirgin >Meet a cute 31 year old single mom >She has a 7 year old boy >Starts showing interest in me >Thinks I'm cool, flirts, eventually asks 183 KB JPG me out. >The date was awesome, I was nervous and she thought it was cute. >Drops her at her place, the nanny is just leaving >"Hey anon, my kid is already sleeping, don't you want to come in?" >holyshititshappening.jpg >Small talk on the couch, she jumps on top of me and starts making out with me. >Sex.jpg >l never felt so happy in my life >Been together for two months >Her kid is a cool guy, loves dinosaurs >We go to the museum, see some fossils I buy him ice cream and a toy triceratops. >"uncle anon, this is the best day ever" For the first time in my life, I feel a fraction of what a being a father is like. I feel purpose and drive, my job doesn't seem pointless anymore. I look forward to meeting them and doing family stuff together. Am I making a huge mistake? I think I'm gonna marry this woman and adopt the little guy.
: Anonymous Inflection point: Should I bec(...) 07/05/21(Mon)22:05:02 No.64455881 >27 yo >khvirgin >Meet a cute 31 year old single mom >She has a 7 year old boy >Starts showing interest in me >Thinks I'm cool, flirts, eventually asks 183 KB JPG me out. >The date was awesome, I was nervous and she thought it was cute. >Drops her at her place, the nanny is just leaving >"Hey anon, my kid is already sleeping, don't you want to come in?" >holyshititshappening.jpg >Small talk on the couch, she jumps on top of me and starts making out with me. >Sex.jpg >l never felt so happy in my life >Been together for two months >Her kid is a cool guy, loves dinosaurs >We go to the museum, see some fossils I buy him ice cream and a toy triceratops. >"uncle anon, this is the best day ever" For the first time in my life, I feel a fraction of what a being a father is like. I feel purpose and drive, my job doesn't seem pointless anymore. I look forward to meeting them and doing family stuff together. Am I making a huge mistake? I think I'm gonna marry this woman and adopt the little guy.

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Anon angered the CCP | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/26/18(Mon)19:35:16 No.78590043 >be me, playing WoW >play on asian servers because NA servers are too easy >2 Chinese players bully me >type "June 4th 1989, Tian an Men Square Massacre" 22 KB JPG >Both disconnect >mfw I just sent two inncoent children to a Chinese Labor Camp and got their whole family executed
Anonymous 11/26/18(Mon)19:35:16 No.78590043 >be me, playing WoW >play on asian servers because NA servers are too easy >2 Chinese players bully me >type "June 4th 1989, Tian an Men Square Massacre" 22 KB JPG >Both disconnect >mfw I just sent two inncoent children to a Chinese Labor Camp and got their whole family executed

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Nice controller | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (Thu)18:52:01 No.395523673 controller.jpg 84 KB JPG >here's your controller bro : Anonymous 11/02/17(Thu)18:52:59 No.395523756 >toss me the controller bro >l can't, it keeps coming back
: Anonymous (Thu)18:52:01 No.395523673 controller.jpg 84 KB JPG >here's your controller bro : Anonymous 11/02/17(Thu)18:52:59 No.395523756 >toss me the controller bro >l can't, it keeps coming back

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Anon gets the talk | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/11/18(Thu)01:16:12 No.782040275 >mom found my a--- bleach stash >confronted me about it >was pretty sure I was about to get it >instead lectures me on how unsafe the current brands in my 59 KB PNG stash were >somehow intricately knowledgeable about their chemical composition and why they're a faulty product >without a doubt, this was the weirdest conversation we've had ever since she tried to give me "the talk" in middle school ten years ago >recommends me some safer brands, and offered to buy them for me, despite my protest >somehow, she trails off into a--- beading >l don't do a--- beads >doesn't believe me >but still says that if I ever end up trying it (despite my reassurance I won't) >"don't pull them out like starting a lawn mower. blood and poopy everywhere." >finally leaves while singing to herself F------ hell, that was horrendous. Anyone happen to know how painful hanging yourself is?
Anonymous 10/11/18(Thu)01:16:12 No.782040275 >mom found my a--- bleach stash >confronted me about it >was pretty sure I was about to get it >instead lectures me on how unsafe the current brands in my 59 KB PNG stash were >somehow intricately knowledgeable about their chemical composition and why they're a faulty product >without a doubt, this was the weirdest conversation we've had ever since she tried to give me "the talk" in middle school ten years ago >recommends me some safer brands, and offered to buy them for me, despite my protest >somehow, she trails off into a--- beading >l don't do a--- beads >doesn't believe me >but still says that if I ever end up trying it (despite my reassurance I won't) >"don't pull them out like starting a lawn mower. blood and poopy everywhere." >finally leaves while singing to herself F------ hell, that was horrendous. Anyone happen to know how painful hanging yourself is?

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Anon is disappointed | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 48619924 34 min temu >be me, going to college in the middle of nowhere >this new big tall Amazon bitch gets drunk at a party and starts ranting about how she would f--- for a box of Samoas >but its February >masterchefactivated.jpeg >l make a batch of Samoas from scratch, the most difficult thing I ever cooked 33,2 kB JPG >she loves them >she otherwise acts like I dont exist and proceeds to f--- some Chad that did not make her Samoas WHY THE F--- DO I EVEN TRY REEEEEE 3 REPLIES 2 IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 48620004 29 min temu O.. >>48619924 (OP) >Taking drunken jokes literally You autists never f------ learn, do you? 1 REPLY
Anonymous 48619924 34 min temu >be me, going to college in the middle of nowhere >this new big tall Amazon bitch gets drunk at a party and starts ranting about how she would f--- for a box of Samoas >but its February >masterchefactivated.jpeg >l make a batch of Samoas from scratch, the most difficult thing I ever cooked 33,2 kB JPG >she loves them >she otherwise acts like I dont exist and proceeds to f--- some Chad that did not make her Samoas WHY THE F--- DO I EVEN TRY REEEEEE 3 REPLIES 2 IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 48620004 29 min temu O.. >>48619924 (OP) >Taking drunken jokes literally You autists never f------ learn, do you? 1 REPLY

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Anon is world weary | /r/Greentext

>be american BORN >get fat, get shot, become poor because surgery is 100 000$ FEEL >be european 14 KB JPG >get beheaded by isis >be asian >suicide because of stress and no gf >be african >be african >be australian >get killed by venomous animal and lose war against emu I guess no place on earth is good after all
>be american BORN >get fat, get shot, become poor because surgery is 100 000$ FEEL >be european 14 KB JPG >get beheaded by isis >be asian >suicide because of stress and no gf >be african >be african >be australian >get killed by venomous animal and lose war against emu I guess no place on earth is good after all

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Anon on zoomers getting drafted. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: srsbQOZ7 ) EE What happens if Zoomers get dr(...) 02/25/22(Fri)03:15:29 No.363159880 >Ayo bruh we rly vibin in ukraine now fr fr 77 KB JPG Anonymous (ID: WQE2CD6S ) E 02/25/22(Fri)03:18:13 No.363160330 >>363159880 (OP). >goes on twitter >all zoomers who dont take anything seriously >half the tweets are "RATIO PUTIN" "L PUTIN PUTIN IS AN L BRUH NO 22 KB PNG CAP" >FINNA GET NBA DRAFTED TO THIS WAR BRUH >GONNA RATIO PUTIN BRUH
Anonymous (ID: srsbQOZ7 ) EE What happens if Zoomers get dr(...) 02/25/22(Fri)03:15:29 No.363159880 >Ayo bruh we rly vibin in ukraine now fr fr 77 KB JPG Anonymous (ID: WQE2CD6S ) E 02/25/22(Fri)03:18:13 No.363160330 >>363159880 (OP). >goes on twitter >all zoomers who dont take anything seriously >half the tweets are "RATIO PUTIN" "L PUTIN PUTIN IS AN L BRUH NO 22 KB PNG CAP" >FINNA GET NBA DRAFTED TO THIS WAR BRUH >GONNA RATIO PUTIN BRUH

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Well that just swung a very sharp left | /r/Greentext

ITT share your most f----- up/extreme sex stories >be me >10 years ago >still in med school >have kinky girlfriend >keep having more intense odd sex >reaches pinnacle of the bizarre >says she wants to be f----- to death or f--- a corpse >idea forms >I "borrow" a defibrillator, adrenaline, and other resuscitative tools from work >get home >hardcore sex for around an hour until we're about to élimax >pull out >ties her down >use defibrillator on her >her heart stops, convulsions, unresponsive >quickly finish f------ her dead body within 3 minutes >begin reviving process immedietly after to avoid brain death >gasps awake, panics, cries >calms down >says she loved it >do this every other month til she committed suicide a year later due to unrelated mental health problems TL;DR? SEX STORIES!
ITT share your most f----- up/extreme sex stories >be me >10 years ago >still in med school >have kinky girlfriend >keep having more intense odd sex >reaches pinnacle of the bizarre >says she wants to be f----- to death or f--- a corpse >idea forms >I "borrow" a defibrillator, adrenaline, and other resuscitative tools from work >get home >hardcore sex for around an hour until we're about to élimax >pull out >ties her down >use defibrillator on her >her heart stops, convulsions, unresponsive >quickly finish f------ her dead body within 3 minutes >begin reviving process immedietly after to avoid brain death >gasps awake, panics, cries >calms down >says she loved it >do this every other month til she committed suicide a year later due to unrelated mental health problems TL;DR? SEX STORIES!

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