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Anon makes good pizza | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/31/18(Sat)03:07:57 No.764293421 >be me >neet loser >hate myself >not good at anything >it's pizza friday >my mom makes the pizza dough, and i make the rest of it 69 KB JPG >mom usually doesn't have pizza >eat my pizza upstairs in my room >tasty.png >go downstairs for more >my mom calls me into her room >"hey anon, i ate some of you pizza, hope you don't mind >whatever.avi >"you make really good pizzas anon. they're the best i've ever tasted" >mom makes my bro try some of the pizza >he loves it aswell >mfw i'm actually OK at something Love you mom.
: Anonymous 03/31/18(Sat)03:07:57 No.764293421 >be me >neet loser >hate myself >not good at anything >it's pizza friday >my mom makes the pizza dough, and i make the rest of it 69 KB JPG >mom usually doesn't have pizza >eat my pizza upstairs in my room >tasty.png >go downstairs for more >my mom calls me into her room >"hey anon, i ate some of you pizza, hope you don't mind >whatever.avi >"you make really good pizzas anon. they're the best i've ever tasted" >mom makes my bro try some of the pizza >he loves it aswell >mfw i'm actually OK at something Love you mom.

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Anon tips generously | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/20/22(Sun)22:47:23 No.65656239 >>65653957 (OP) # >go to bar alone >bartender mirin >catch her eye a couple times and she keeps checking on me 15 KB JPG >smiles a lot too >should be an easy f--- >leave $20 tip with my number written on it >she never calls >receipt has her first name and first letter of last name >find her instagram >rub one out to her selfies and the block her >never go back to that bar all women are w-----. >>65656265 # >>65656297 # >>65656363 # >>65656378 # >>65656392 # >>65656405 # >>65657215 # >>65657353 # >>65657402 # >>65658703 # >>65660039 # >>65661097 #
: Anonymous 02/20/22(Sun)22:47:23 No.65656239 >>65653957 (OP) # >go to bar alone >bartender mirin >catch her eye a couple times and she keeps checking on me 15 KB JPG >smiles a lot too >should be an easy f--- >leave $20 tip with my number written on it >she never calls >receipt has her first name and first letter of last name >find her instagram >rub one out to her selfies and the block her >never go back to that bar all women are w-----. >>65656265 # >>65656297 # >>65656363 # >>65656378 # >>65656392 # >>65656405 # >>65657215 # >>65657353 # >>65657402 # >>65658703 # >>65660039 # >>65661097 #

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Anon finds out about woman | /r/Greentext


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Anon doesn't like Christmas | /r/Greentext


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so THATS the source of it all | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/20/22(Sun) 16:15:27 No.873065068 >McDonald's was invented in 1955 >Americans after 1955 101 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/20/22(Sun) 16:15:27 No.873065068 >McDonald's was invented in 1955 >Americans after 1955 101 KB JPG

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Anons band | /r/Greentext

File: fren jam.gif (60 KB, 753x184) Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:04:07 No.8478409 >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Dun Dun Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Dun Dun Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Dun Dun Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Dun Dun Da Da >Ba Da Da Da Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:05:42 No.847841044 >>847840991 (OP) thanks anon O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:15:10 No.847841315 ► File: 1611116791333 gif (615 KB, 284x250) >GUITAR SOLO! >Wee Wow Wow Wow >Wee Wee Wow Wow >Wee Wee Wee Wee >Wow Wow Wow Wow O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:17:14 No.847841374 >>847840991 (OP). T-T Beautiful performance anon!!! O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:26:21 No.847841675 File: 122733239 281422292552714(..).jpg (20 KB, 384x384) >Hello darkness, my old friend >l've come to talk with you again >Because a vision softly creeping >Left its seeds while I was sleeping O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:42:15 No.847842225 File: microphone-clip-art-micro(.).jpg (150 KB, 800x1235) Join the fun fren! O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:49:30 No.847842451 File: 1582135965705.jpg (38 KB, 1024x511) >>847842564 WHOAAAAA BLACK N----- PAM BADAM WHOAAAAA BLACK N----- PAM BADAM O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:52:19 No.847842564 File: 1611127580377.jpg (9 KB, 270x186) >>847842451 noooooooo Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:55:19 No.847842683 File: 1611116644248.jpg (11 KB, 225x225) I love this thread
File: fren jam.gif (60 KB, 753x184) Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:04:07 No.8478409 >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Dun Dun Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Dun Dun Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Dun Dun Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Ba Da Da Da >Dun Dun Da Da >Ba Da Da Da Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:05:42 No.847841044 >>847840991 (OP) thanks anon O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:15:10 No.847841315 ► File: 1611116791333 gif (615 KB, 284x250) >GUITAR SOLO! >Wee Wow Wow Wow >Wee Wee Wow Wow >Wee Wee Wee Wee >Wow Wow Wow Wow O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:17:14 No.847841374 >>847840991 (OP). T-T Beautiful performance anon!!! O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:26:21 No.847841675 File: 122733239 281422292552714(..).jpg (20 KB, 384x384) >Hello darkness, my old friend >l've come to talk with you again >Because a vision softly creeping >Left its seeds while I was sleeping O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:42:15 No.847842225 File: microphone-clip-art-micro(.).jpg (150 KB, 800x1235) Join the fun fren! O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:49:30 No.847842451 File: 1582135965705.jpg (38 KB, 1024x511) >>847842564 WHOAAAAA BLACK N----- PAM BADAM WHOAAAAA BLACK N----- PAM BADAM O Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:52:19 No.847842564 File: 1611127580377.jpg (9 KB, 270x186) >>847842451 noooooooo Anonymous 02/20/21(Sat)12:55:19 No.847842683 File: 1611116644248.jpg (11 KB, 225x225) I love this thread

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Anon has a retarded dad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Traumatizing Childhood Stories(...) 06/01/20(Mon)20:21:02 No.58447994 >little brother is diagnosed, by a professional, with severe depression >Boomer dad is convinced he's just being a little bitch >"stop acting sad all the f------ THe iN At er fatM Qure 236 KB PNG time" x100 >dad locks him out of the house so he'll "learn to be normal" >dad tosses his medication away because medicine is expensive >only let's him take his meds when our school finds out and gets CPS involved >dad makes a scene every time we take him to the doctors >little bro can't take it anymore >tells him he can't take this s--- anymore >dad slams his gun on the living room table >"If you're really so f------ sad you'd kill yourself!" >BANG >rip, little buddy >mom running from the kitchen screaming >dad being put in handcuffs screaming "it wasn't my fault" >taken out of school for a bit and into therapy >dad still swears to this day it was the doctors medication that made Daniel kill himself It's been ten f------ years and it still eats away at me. There's nothing worse than being born to dumb f------ parents.
: Anonymous Traumatizing Childhood Stories(...) 06/01/20(Mon)20:21:02 No.58447994 >little brother is diagnosed, by a professional, with severe depression >Boomer dad is convinced he's just being a little bitch >"stop acting sad all the f------ THe iN At er fatM Qure 236 KB PNG time" x100 >dad locks him out of the house so he'll "learn to be normal" >dad tosses his medication away because medicine is expensive >only let's him take his meds when our school finds out and gets CPS involved >dad makes a scene every time we take him to the doctors >little bro can't take it anymore >tells him he can't take this s--- anymore >dad slams his gun on the living room table >"If you're really so f------ sad you'd kill yourself!" >BANG >rip, little buddy >mom running from the kitchen screaming >dad being put in handcuffs screaming "it wasn't my fault" >taken out of school for a bit and into therapy >dad still swears to this day it was the doctors medication that made Daniel kill himself It's been ten f------ years and it still eats away at me. There's nothing worse than being born to dumb f------ parents.

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Anon cannot be fooled | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/23/15(Wed)22:56:01 No.642863132 >>642860186 (OP) # >work at liqour store >see obviously underage girls enter and rush to the back >hear them whispering and discussing what to get >they grab heaven hill vodka >they try and check out and I ask for l'd >they "lost" it but one says her dad says its ok she's 22 >laugh at them and tell them gtfo >same girl tells me her dad is rich blah blah >they leave and I start eating a pickle in a bag >drive thru bell rings >walk over and see its the same girls >they freak out one says that there should have been someone else >I stare at them eating my pickle >they speed off >good pickle
: Anonymous 09/23/15(Wed)22:56:01 No.642863132 >>642860186 (OP) # >work at liqour store >see obviously underage girls enter and rush to the back >hear them whispering and discussing what to get >they grab heaven hill vodka >they try and check out and I ask for l'd >they "lost" it but one says her dad says its ok she's 22 >laugh at them and tell them gtfo >same girl tells me her dad is rich blah blah >they leave and I start eating a pickle in a bag >drive thru bell rings >walk over and see its the same girls >they freak out one says that there should have been someone else >I stare at them eating my pickle >they speed off >good pickle

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Anon took AncestryDNA | /r/Greentext

> be me > racist af > took AncestryDNA > got 3% Nigerian > im now Volunteer at NAACP 68 KB PNG
> be me > racist af > took AncestryDNA > got 3% Nigerian > im now Volunteer at NAACP 68 KB PNG

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Anon isn't invited | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)00:41:32 No.67511737 >match with girl on tinder >hitting it off pretty well >invites me over to her place to watch movies >come over >she's completely opposite in person, cold and unresponsive 273 KB PNG >make small talk, she gives me one word responses >take it to the bedroom >we're lying in bed watching tv >notice her body language, ask if she's in the mood to do anything >"Not really, I'm tired." >"ok do you want to cuddle or something." >"Not really" >mfw >fall asleep next to this chick >leave in the morning without saying anything >check snapchat >see pictures of my friend getting married >didn't even get an invite What's the best website to livestream my suicide Also share s----- Tinder stories to make me feel less miserable : Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)00:45:01 No.67511766 >>67511737 (OP) # >Also share s----- Tinder stories to make me feel less miserable Jokes on you, never used it. But anon, we all go through bad stuff. Don't kill yourself over it yada yada you know the deal.
: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)00:41:32 No.67511737 >match with girl on tinder >hitting it off pretty well >invites me over to her place to watch movies >come over >she's completely opposite in person, cold and unresponsive 273 KB PNG >make small talk, she gives me one word responses >take it to the bedroom >we're lying in bed watching tv >notice her body language, ask if she's in the mood to do anything >"Not really, I'm tired." >"ok do you want to cuddle or something." >"Not really" >mfw >fall asleep next to this chick >leave in the morning without saying anything >check snapchat >see pictures of my friend getting married >didn't even get an invite What's the best website to livestream my suicide Also share s----- Tinder stories to make me feel less miserable : Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)00:45:01 No.67511766 >>67511737 (OP) # >Also share s----- Tinder stories to make me feel less miserable Jokes on you, never used it. But anon, we all go through bad stuff. Don't kill yourself over it yada yada you know the deal.

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Anon had a smol cat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)05:53:52 No.67519006 >be me >10 years old >my mom just bought a cat >very cute and smol >black with white paws >fast foward 12 years 64 KB JPG >over the last 3 years i got more and more depressed >no matter how depressed I got I never cried >always felt like I had no valve to release my sadness >cute smol cat is now cute old cat >has always cheered me up to see her lying in my bed >would die for her >one day cat starts to behave different >doesnt eat, always tired >drive to vet >she has a kidney disease >vet told that she doesnt have long >after that it gets worse >I decided to euthanize her so she can go in peace >after the euthanasia I sit in my car >started crying for almost 1 hour >all the feelings inside me bursted out >really felt good thank you for helping me for the last time my cute smol cat
: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)05:53:52 No.67519006 >be me >10 years old >my mom just bought a cat >very cute and smol >black with white paws >fast foward 12 years 64 KB JPG >over the last 3 years i got more and more depressed >no matter how depressed I got I never cried >always felt like I had no valve to release my sadness >cute smol cat is now cute old cat >has always cheered me up to see her lying in my bed >would die for her >one day cat starts to behave different >doesnt eat, always tired >drive to vet >she has a kidney disease >vet told that she doesnt have long >after that it gets worse >I decided to euthanize her so she can go in peace >after the euthanasia I sit in my car >started crying for almost 1 hour >all the feelings inside me bursted out >really felt good thank you for helping me for the last time my cute smol cat

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Anon relates with his supervisor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/21/18(Fri)13:36:49 No.780428621 >be me >be working as a slot machine tech in some casino >one night i got called because a guest has a problem with pic related >onmyway.jpg >the guest is an enormous black lady 326 KB JPG with sass smelling like baby powder >dressed all sexy even though she isnt >apparently she put in a 100$ bill and the machine did not process it for her to play >it actually happens sometimes so okay >tell her to move back so i can open the machine >*doesnt move* >"maam I need you to move so I can open the machine to verify if your bill is in here!" >"I told you i put it in there!!! Just gimme my money back!!!" >"i understand but i need to do some verifications before giving you 100$" >"are you calling me a theif??you think cuz im black im trying to rob you?!?" >ohhhboy.gif >call in my supervisor since its starting to get violent >supervisor is a cool black dude >we check the machine cashbox, there is no 100$ in it >"maam we're sorry but no 100$ was inserted in the machine in the last 2hours" >"you calling me a liar, you is a racist im no liar my father wuz a police officer blabla!!!" >black supervisor interrupts >"maam i worked with this guy for 10 years and i assure you he's not racist you just a broke ass n---- tryna hustle a couple bucks here today, so now get yo black ass out of here before i call security!" >she leaves with big eye like black women usually do >sup looks at me >"f------ n------" >black people hate n------ just as much as we do.
: Anonymous 09/21/18(Fri)13:36:49 No.780428621 >be me >be working as a slot machine tech in some casino >one night i got called because a guest has a problem with pic related >onmyway.jpg >the guest is an enormous black lady 326 KB JPG with sass smelling like baby powder >dressed all sexy even though she isnt >apparently she put in a 100$ bill and the machine did not process it for her to play >it actually happens sometimes so okay >tell her to move back so i can open the machine >*doesnt move* >"maam I need you to move so I can open the machine to verify if your bill is in here!" >"I told you i put it in there!!! Just gimme my money back!!!" >"i understand but i need to do some verifications before giving you 100$" >"are you calling me a theif??you think cuz im black im trying to rob you?!?" >ohhhboy.gif >call in my supervisor since its starting to get violent >supervisor is a cool black dude >we check the machine cashbox, there is no 100$ in it >"maam we're sorry but no 100$ was inserted in the machine in the last 2hours" >"you calling me a liar, you is a racist im no liar my father wuz a police officer blabla!!!" >black supervisor interrupts >"maam i worked with this guy for 10 years and i assure you he's not racist you just a broke ass n---- tryna hustle a couple bucks here today, so now get yo black ass out of here before i call security!" >she leaves with big eye like black women usually do >sup looks at me >"f------ n------" >black people hate n------ just as much as we do.

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Is the circle of life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/21/21(Sat)14:23:12 No.65075596 >want to message sonmeone >don't want to bother them 193 KB PNG : Anonymous 08/21/21(Sat)14:23:54 No.65075598 >>65075596 (OP)# so instead you bother us with this s----- thread
: Anonymous 08/21/21(Sat)14:23:12 No.65075596 >want to message sonmeone >don't want to bother them 193 KB PNG : Anonymous 08/21/21(Sat)14:23:54 No.65075598 >>65075596 (OP)# so instead you bother us with this s----- thread

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Anon is not a wagecuck | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)06:25:46 No.873103918 Every morning my alarm wakes me up at 7 am. I get up, turn it off and go back to sleep. I do this to remind myself what wagies have to go through every single day and why I'm never getting a job 389 KB PNG View Thread
: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)06:25:46 No.873103918 Every morning my alarm wakes me up at 7 am. I get up, turn it off and go back to sleep. I do this to remind myself what wagies have to go through every single day and why I'm never getting a job 389 KB PNG View Thread

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I wonder howdy anon is | /r/Greentext

>tfw i went through a cowboy phase >become obsessed with movies like The Searchers, Unforgiven and True Grit >actually wore a cowboy hat and a long leather trench coat to high school >would chew a tooth pick and tip my hat at girls >see people from school years later in the street. 17.9 kB PNG >they say "Howdy partner!" before bursting into laughter What was I thinking?
>tfw i went through a cowboy phase >become obsessed with movies like The Searchers, Unforgiven and True Grit >actually wore a cowboy hat and a long leather trench coat to high school >would chew a tooth pick and tip my hat at girls >see people from school years later in the street. 17.9 kB PNG >they say "Howdy partner!" before bursting into laughter What was I thinking?

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Anon likes spiders | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)04:50:10 No.873085872 >mfw I realize all of Spider Man's enemies are based off a spider's natural predators 1.78 MB PNG : Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)04:51:26 No.873085947 Octopus and Rhino? >>873086451 # >>873086984 # >>873090819 # >>873090889 # >>873092174 # : Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)04:52:28 No.873086003 Also crocodiles >>873086451 # >>873086984 # >>873090819 # >>873090889 # : Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)04:52:48 No.873086025 ah yes the spiders natural predator, the goblin >>873086451 # >>873086984 # >>873090819 # >>873090889 #
: Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)04:50:10 No.873085872 >mfw I realize all of Spider Man's enemies are based off a spider's natural predators 1.78 MB PNG : Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)04:51:26 No.873085947 Octopus and Rhino? >>873086451 # >>873086984 # >>873090819 # >>873090889 # >>873092174 # : Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)04:52:28 No.873086003 Also crocodiles >>873086451 # >>873086984 # >>873090819 # >>873090889 # : Anonymous 02/21/22(Mon)04:52:48 No.873086025 ah yes the spiders natural predator, the goblin >>873086451 # >>873086984 # >>873090819 # >>873090889 #

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Anon isnt feeling well | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/20/22(Sun)21:35:29 No.873085111 just ate a pound of red cabbage. not feeling well 863 KB PNG
: Anonymous 02/20/22(Sun)21:35:29 No.873085111 just ate a pound of red cabbage. not feeling well 863 KB PNG

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Anon is a simp. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/20/22(Sun)23:23:21 No.67514810 >be me >been following this E-girl on twitter for a while now >she always likes my comments and sometimes replies >she posts a lot of explicit stuff on twitter but apparently her onlyfans stuff is wilder >be seriously thinking about subscribing and 9 KB JPG finally give in >save some money and spend 150 dlls on a three month subscription and a d--- rating >get access to her videos and pics >co00000om.wav >be literally 4 days later >browsing my favorite sketchy coom forums as usual >saw someone leaked all her content >Literally had to unsubscribe from some other services to save money to have all her stuff for free anyways At least she said my d--- looked cute
Anonymous 02/20/22(Sun)23:23:21 No.67514810 >be me >been following this E-girl on twitter for a while now >she always likes my comments and sometimes replies >she posts a lot of explicit stuff on twitter but apparently her onlyfans stuff is wilder >be seriously thinking about subscribing and 9 KB JPG finally give in >save some money and spend 150 dlls on a three month subscription and a d--- rating >get access to her videos and pics >co00000om.wav >be literally 4 days later >browsing my favorite sketchy coom forums as usual >saw someone leaked all her content >Literally had to unsubscribe from some other services to save money to have all her stuff for free anyways At least she said my d--- looked cute

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Anon knows the truth | /r/Greentext


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anon is jumping on his bed | /r/Greentext


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