Greentext Stories - Images

Sorted By:

Christmas Money Well Spent | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/12/22(Wed)08:39:59 No.870499079 >be me, 19 >friend gave me $25 for christmas >get excited cause free fun money >realize that I actually don't want anything >just used it to buy gas god f------ damnit is this what growing up 60 KB JPG feels like
: Anonymous 01/12/22(Wed)08:39:59 No.870499079 >be me, 19 >friend gave me $25 for christmas >get excited cause free fun money >realize that I actually don't want anything >just used it to buy gas god f------ damnit is this what growing up 60 KB JPG feels like

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext eyelash font rectangle

Anon loses his virginity | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/28/21(Sun)21:07:25 No.62950365 The Virgin Chad >hire a h----- >tell her I'm a virgin >not actually a virgin, have had plenty of sex >but when she thinks it's my first time, she's very gentle and sensual, and I get to act nervous and submissive, which really turns 34 KB JPG me on >when I act all amazed when I touch boobs "for the first time", it actually feels more special to me >I love how caring she is and how she takes the lead if she thinks she's deflowering me >when I finish, she cuddles with me and calls me a good boy I've done this with about 20 different hookers now and I can't stop.
: Anonymous 03/28/21(Sun)21:07:25 No.62950365 The Virgin Chad >hire a h----- >tell her I'm a virgin >not actually a virgin, have had plenty of sex >but when she thinks it's my first time, she's very gentle and sensual, and I get to act nervous and submissive, which really turns 34 KB JPG me on >when I act all amazed when I touch boobs "for the first time", it actually feels more special to me >I love how caring she is and how she takes the lead if she thinks she's deflowering me >when I finish, she cuddles with me and calls me a good boy I've done this with about 20 different hookers now and I can't stop.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism font

Anon decides to not have depression | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/06/21 (Thu)20:52:32 No.853820308 >be me >have deppression >go to hospital for suicidal thoughts >got meds that never worked 9 KB JPG >realize deppression is cringe >litteraly just decide to not have it anymore >mfw it f------ worked 1 Reply View Thread
: Anonymous 05/06/21 (Thu)20:52:32 No.853820308 >be me >have deppression >go to hospital for suicidal thoughts >got meds that never worked 9 KB JPG >realize deppression is cringe >litteraly just decide to not have it anymore >mfw it f------ worked 1 Reply View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font terrestrial plant

Anons wife has a bun in the oven | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/18(Wed)18:07:40 No.775962516 So my wife is pregnant and we dont know the gender of the child yet. we were talking about names and she asked what names like the most 30 KB JPG >said sarcastically Chad and Stacey while trying not to laugh >mfw she said she likes those name >mfw she said that this could be the names of popular children in school >mfw when she told my and her parents and they also like them fml : Anonymous 08/01/18(Wed)18:24:06 No.775963397 >>775962516 (OP) # Inb4 babyanon will be the first autistic Chad/Stacy
: Anonymous 08/01/18(Wed)18:07:40 No.775962516 So my wife is pregnant and we dont know the gender of the child yet. we were talking about names and she asked what names like the most 30 KB JPG >said sarcastically Chad and Stacey while trying not to laugh >mfw she said she likes those name >mfw she said that this could be the names of popular children in school >mfw when she told my and her parents and they also like them fml : Anonymous 08/01/18(Wed)18:24:06 No.775963397 >>775962516 (OP) # Inb4 babyanon will be the first autistic Chad/Stacy

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anons a wizard | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/26/16(Mon)12:08:04 No.31679831 >be autist >have nothing to do >decide to cast a magic spell because you gotta try every so often in case you DO have those secret anime powers >read 7 is magic number 13 KB PNG >make text document called 77777777777777777777 7777 777777777.txt >write a bunch of names while chanting b------- >next day neighbor is found dead AMA
: Anonymous 09/26/16(Mon)12:08:04 No.31679831 >be autist >have nothing to do >decide to cast a magic spell because you gotta try every so often in case you DO have those secret anime powers >read 7 is magic number 13 KB PNG >make text document called 77777777777777777777 7777 777777777.txt >write a bunch of names while chanting b------- >next day neighbor is found dead AMA

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant font

Anon is a sea turtle | /r/Greentext

10:31 PM 55% | Anonymous 01/07/19(Mon)22:27:35 No.789390928 >be me >Be a sea turtle >In my egg >Be fully formed >"Guess it's time to get out" >get out my egg >F------ UNDER THE F------ SAND!! 29 KB JPG >MY SIBLINGS ALSO COME AND F------ START CLIMBING ON TO EACH OTHER TO GET OUT UNDER THE F------ SAND!!! > Make it out >Finally f------ fresh air >time to get to the ocean >Half way through and f------ bird start eating my brother's >S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- >GOING AS FAST AS I CAN!!!!!!! >BIRD GETS NEAR ME >F--- F--- F--- F--- F--- >human appears out of nowhere and scares bird away >Thanks human >Get in the ocean >Feelsgoodman.jpeg Fast forward a bit >Be fully grown adult sea turtle >Life is good >Mating regularly like a Chad >See jellyfish chilling unsuspected >Snacktime.org >Yeet that bitch >Weird taste >Swallow it >Won't pass through my throat >F------ choke and die >Turns out it was plastic F--- you humans
10:31 PM 55% | Anonymous 01/07/19(Mon)22:27:35 No.789390928 >be me >Be a sea turtle >In my egg >Be fully formed >"Guess it's time to get out" >get out my egg >F------ UNDER THE F------ SAND!! 29 KB JPG >MY SIBLINGS ALSO COME AND F------ START CLIMBING ON TO EACH OTHER TO GET OUT UNDER THE F------ SAND!!! > Make it out >Finally f------ fresh air >time to get to the ocean >Half way through and f------ bird start eating my brother's >S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- S--- >GOING AS FAST AS I CAN!!!!!!! >BIRD GETS NEAR ME >F--- F--- F--- F--- F--- >human appears out of nowhere and scares bird away >Thanks human >Get in the ocean >Feelsgoodman.jpeg Fast forward a bit >Be fully grown adult sea turtle >Life is good >Mating regularly like a Chad >See jellyfish chilling unsuspected >Snacktime.org >Yeet that bitch >Weird taste >Swallow it >Won't pass through my throat >F------ choke and die >Turns out it was plastic F--- you humans

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon is ready to go on a quest | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/10/22(Mon)08:32:59 No.162089873 MOVIECLIPS.cOM 1585413495441.jpg 58 KB JPG >The virus cannot be destroyed by any vaccine that we here possess. Covid-19 was made in the laboratories of Wuhan. Only there can it be unmade. It must be taken deep into the Hubei province and cast back into the zoonotic wet- market from whence it came! One of you... must do this. >>162090518 # >>162090529 #
: Anonymous 01/10/22(Mon)08:32:59 No.162089873 MOVIECLIPS.cOM 1585413495441.jpg 58 KB JPG >The virus cannot be destroyed by any vaccine that we here possess. Covid-19 was made in the laboratories of Wuhan. Only there can it be unmade. It must be taken deep into the Hubei province and cast back into the zoonotic wet- market from whence it came! One of you... must do this. >>162090518 # >>162090529 #

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext facial expression eyelash jaw organism font screenshot

Anon is the champion | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/18(Tue)07:35:37 No.775858580 I miss greentext stories >be me >15 yrs old >2001 48 KB JPG >naïve as f--- >no one home, decide to smoke pot in my room >bigmistake.png >made my own bong out of a water bottle, pens and tin foil >mfw it actually works >l put on an old tape of 80s MTV music videos I found in my dads room and commence the sesh >half an hour later, about 6-8 tokes deep >feelsgoodman >l remember the trip being good, up to this point *knock knock* >l almost d--------- my own drool as I try to get my fat ass up to clean everything "ONE SECOND IM BUSY" >literally trying to throw all my s--- under blankets at mach 5 >my mom tries to open my door to realize it's locked "ANON OPEN THE DOOR" >lt stärts to sink in that I have no way to stop this from happening >the tv is blasting "we are the champions" >irony.png >wait >I look at the screen for a solid couple seconds >idea.jpeg >my mom gets the key for the door and starts to unlock it >ohfuckohfuckohfuck >Without even batting an eye I yank my pants down to the floor >the door opens "I CAN EXPLAIN- THIS" >and there I am, standing there flashing my smelly rancid 15 year old penis to my shocked mother >she looks at the tv >pic related ".what the f--- anon" mfw I convinced my mom that I was jacking off to queen
: Anonymous 07/31/18(Tue)07:35:37 No.775858580 I miss greentext stories >be me >15 yrs old >2001 48 KB JPG >naïve as f--- >no one home, decide to smoke pot in my room >bigmistake.png >made my own bong out of a water bottle, pens and tin foil >mfw it actually works >l put on an old tape of 80s MTV music videos I found in my dads room and commence the sesh >half an hour later, about 6-8 tokes deep >feelsgoodman >l remember the trip being good, up to this point *knock knock* >l almost d--------- my own drool as I try to get my fat ass up to clean everything "ONE SECOND IM BUSY" >literally trying to throw all my s--- under blankets at mach 5 >my mom tries to open my door to realize it's locked "ANON OPEN THE DOOR" >lt stärts to sink in that I have no way to stop this from happening >the tv is blasting "we are the champions" >irony.png >wait >I look at the screen for a solid couple seconds >idea.jpeg >my mom gets the key for the door and starts to unlock it >ohfuckohfuckohfuck >Without even batting an eye I yank my pants down to the floor >the door opens "I CAN EXPLAIN- THIS" >and there I am, standing there flashing my smelly rancid 15 year old penis to my shocked mother >she looks at the tv >pic related ".what the f--- anon" mfw I convinced my mom that I was jacking off to queen

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon is on the case | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/11/22(Tue)11:57:17 No.162148925 FDED9997-29E2-43FF-98C1-C325275245AA.jpg 136 KB JPG >I checked out her alibi and sure enough, the northern lights tour wasn't running that day >I can't work out whether this broad is for real or this fraud is boreal >>162149135 # >>162150118 # >>162152453 # >>162153371 # >>162155927 #
: Anonymous 01/11/22(Tue)11:57:17 No.162148925 FDED9997-29E2-43FF-98C1-C325275245AA.jpg 136 KB JPG >I checked out her alibi and sure enough, the northern lights tour wasn't running that day >I can't work out whether this broad is for real or this fraud is boreal >>162149135 # >>162150118 # >>162152453 # >>162153371 # >>162155927 #

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext facial expression hat sun hat fedora organism gesture font smile cartoon

Anon has plans | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon dodged an emotionally unstable bullet. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Femanons explain this 08/22/19(Thu)06:32:21 No.54029533 >be me >talk to cute girl >l'm totally into her >seems like she's into me as well >ask girl out >girl says no >okie dokie, moving on >later hear from mutual friend that girl was wondering as to why I gave up so easily in trying to pursue her 1.77 MB GIF
: Anonymous Femanons explain this 08/22/19(Thu)06:32:21 No.54029533 >be me >talk to cute girl >l'm totally into her >seems like she's into me as well >ask girl out >girl says no >okie dokie, moving on >later hear from mutual friend that girl was wondering as to why I gave up so easily in trying to pursue her 1.77 MB GIF

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism gesture terrestrial plant

Anon has nice gf | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/12/22(Wed)07:33:28 No.870488048 >be me, average retard >have gf >see posts about r/femaledatingstrategy, show gf few months ago and laugh >ff to day >see her browsing and commenting >thisaintgood 26 KB JPG >ask what's she's writing >says she tried to comment but ended up getting downvoted for being honest >says she's getting annoyed at them >"they'll never get a man because they're fat bitches on reddit" >she's actively trolling their community >going through one user's posts and commenting "lardo" >"fat lardo" >"lardosaurusrex" >mfw We had good sex today then she made me a pulled pork dinner for my birthday I love this woman
: Anonymous 01/12/22(Wed)07:33:28 No.870488048 >be me, average retard >have gf >see posts about r/femaledatingstrategy, show gf few months ago and laugh >ff to day >see her browsing and commenting >thisaintgood 26 KB JPG >ask what's she's writing >says she tried to comment but ended up getting downvoted for being honest >says she's getting annoyed at them >"they'll never get a man because they're fat bitches on reddit" >she's actively trolling their community >going through one user's posts and commenting "lardo" >"fat lardo" >"lardosaurusrex" >mfw We had good sex today then she made me a pulled pork dinner for my birthday I love this woman

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

This made me feel more than I wanted. | /r/Greentext

File: Screenshot 2022-01-11 224816.jpg (39 KB, 338x343) O Anonymous 01/11/22(Tue)22:48:43 No.870472834 >be me, depressed loser, outcast, skinny game addict, living from welfare >never had any joy in life >never go outside >never received love from my family >0 friends, don't even try to find a girl >one day, I do my hasty grocery shopping >social anxiety kills me, even tho no one pays me attention >accidentally bump into someone >its a cute girl >mumble sorry, legs already shaking >she gives me the most innocent smile >its like watching a sunrise >I smile back, something I didn't have in years wells up, a warm feeling >another women approaches >"Oh did my daughter bother you? She is mentally disabled, sorry for that." >Takes her away >l often think about her
File: Screenshot 2022-01-11 224816.jpg (39 KB, 338x343) O Anonymous 01/11/22(Tue)22:48:43 No.870472834 >be me, depressed loser, outcast, skinny game addict, living from welfare >never had any joy in life >never go outside >never received love from my family >0 friends, don't even try to find a girl >one day, I do my hasty grocery shopping >social anxiety kills me, even tho no one pays me attention >accidentally bump into someone >its a cute girl >mumble sorry, legs already shaking >she gives me the most innocent smile >its like watching a sunrise >I smile back, something I didn't have in years wells up, a warm feeling >another women approaches >"Oh did my daughter bother you? She is mentally disabled, sorry for that." >Takes her away >l often think about her

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext hair nose chin smile eyebrow eye eyelash mouth human body jaw happy gesture font

Anon is writing a sad Christmas story | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Mao The Dong | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon solves homelessness | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands 272 KB JPG >last week find a hobo walking through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >I don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random n---- ghetto >L leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands 272 KB JPG >last week find a hobo walking through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >I don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random n---- ghetto >L leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon does an oopsie | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon becomes a boss. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/06/19(Sun)13:43:58 No.789289040 >be me >sitting in my studio apartment in my recliner watching tv >press the record button on my DVD player >fbi warning appears >whatever.jpg 27 KB JPG >record anyway >suddenly I'm no longer in a wife beater and dirty sweat pants >suddenly l'm in a suit and my hair is combed back >suddenly my studio apartment is a luxury condominium >there's a Ivl 50 above my head. That's how Maria works.
: Anonymous 01/06/19(Sun)13:43:58 No.789289040 >be me >sitting in my studio apartment in my recliner watching tv >press the record button on my DVD player >fbi warning appears >whatever.jpg 27 KB JPG >record anyway >suddenly I'm no longer in a wife beater and dirty sweat pants >suddenly l'm in a suit and my hair is combed back >suddenly my studio apartment is a luxury condominium >there's a Ivl 50 above my head. That's how Maria works.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon spitting facts | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Igenderequality/ 09/17/18(Mon)05:58:34 No.48178550 >be me >suck a d--- >gets called a f----- >girl sucks multiple d---- >not a f----- >mfw 72 KB JPG View Thread
: Anonymous Igenderequality/ 09/17/18(Mon)05:58:34 No.48178550 >be me >suck a d--- >gets called a f----- >girl sucks multiple d---- >not a f----- >mfw 72 KB JPG View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext rectangle font terrestrial plant

Anon likes the elderly | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/12/18(Thu)22:46:24 No.774164138 Work stories thread? Work stories thread. >Be me. Aged/Disability care worker. >All sorts of old f------ in my care 6 KB JPG home, but I mostly deal with dementia patients. >God damned goofy bastard dementia patients >One little old bastard must've been a boy when the dinosaurs were still around >Literally old as dirt. >We learn from his family that he had a little black dog back in the 40's. >Dog's name was N-----. >F------ wish I was making this s--- up. >Old bastard still thinks he's living at home in the 40's with N-----. >Constantly walks around the facility asking all the staff if we've seen N-----. >Walks around yelling out N----- as loud as his old lungs can manage. >Find out this morning we've got a new staff member coming on board next week. >They're dark skinned (not sure actual heritage but still) Looking forward to how this plays out /b/ros. View Thread
: Anonymous 07/12/18(Thu)22:46:24 No.774164138 Work stories thread? Work stories thread. >Be me. Aged/Disability care worker. >All sorts of old f------ in my care 6 KB JPG home, but I mostly deal with dementia patients. >God damned goofy bastard dementia patients >One little old bastard must've been a boy when the dinosaurs were still around >Literally old as dirt. >We learn from his family that he had a little black dog back in the 40's. >Dog's name was N-----. >F------ wish I was making this s--- up. >Old bastard still thinks he's living at home in the 40's with N-----. >Constantly walks around the facility asking all the staff if we've seen N-----. >Walks around yelling out N----- as loud as his old lungs can manage. >Find out this morning we've got a new staff member coming on board next week. >They're dark skinned (not sure actual heritage but still) Looking forward to how this plays out /b/ros. View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font