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Anon learns Ukrainian | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: /BTgcwuQ) H Why are Ukranians like this? >SLABLAHBLAH 12/12/23(Tue)08:44:23 No.451636826 pig.jpg 6 KB JPG UKRAAAAAIIIINEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIGGGHHH >COUNTEROFFENSYYYYI|||||||||VVVVVV >MYOAR MONNNEEEEIIIGGGHHHH >KIIIEEEEEEEEV : Anonymous (ID: 9ZXWOC89) [+] 12/12/23(Tue)08:45:37 No.451636895 at least they're not a F------ LEAF >>451636997 # >>451637876 # >>451639974 # >>451642036 #
: Anonymous (ID: /BTgcwuQ) H Why are Ukranians like this? >SLABLAHBLAH 12/12/23(Tue)08:44:23 No.451636826 pig.jpg 6 KB JPG UKRAAAAAIIIINEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIGGGHHH >COUNTEROFFENSYYYYI|||||||||VVVVVV >MYOAR MONNNEEEEIIIGGGHHHH >KIIIEEEEEEEEV : Anonymous (ID: 9ZXWOC89) [+] 12/12/23(Tue)08:45:37 No.451636895 at least they're not a F------ LEAF >>451636997 # >>451637876 # >>451639974 # >>451642036 #

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Rugby practice | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 25/01/2024, 7:19:15 PM No.26073621 30 KB JPEG > be me > 14 yo at rugby practice > One of the team has Down syndrome >We rotate taking turns holding the tackle bag > Have always been taught to treat people with disabilities the same as everyone else > My turn to tackle the bag with Down syndrome kid holding it > Autisium.exe > Tackel the bag as hard as I would for anyone else > Down syndrome kid falls to the ground and starts crying > Everyone yells at me Why is the world so complicated anons
Anonymous 25/01/2024, 7:19:15 PM No.26073621 30 KB JPEG > be me > 14 yo at rugby practice > One of the team has Down syndrome >We rotate taking turns holding the tackle bag > Have always been taught to treat people with disabilities the same as everyone else > My turn to tackle the bag with Down syndrome kid holding it > Autisium.exe > Tackel the bag as hard as I would for anyone else > Down syndrome kid falls to the ground and starts crying > Everyone yells at me Why is the world so complicated anons

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I feel really fucking bad for Anon :( | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)16:50:13 No.913096396 393 KB JPG >with same women for 7 years >things are going great in our relationship >married with one kid >sex life is great >money is great >she's happy everyday >constantly buy her gifts, take her on vacation, spoil her to the max >love my family and find peace in it >3 weeks ago she starts acting weird >starts being quiet and distant >starts to ignore my texts >tells me she deleted Facebook >I ask if she's okay, which is ignored >I offer to pay for therapy if she's depressed, to take her on a date, to go on a trip anything to cheer her up >she says no >fast forward to Thursday I come home >she isn't there >her stuff is gone too >same with my child >call her a dozen times with no answer >finally hours later I get a call from her >she explains to me that she started dating someone else while I was out working and she wants to give him a chance >says she needs time away from me and when I start to cry she tells me "we're not doing this right now" and hangs up >suspicious she blocked me of Facebook so I make an alt account >found her profile and I was correct >same guy I never met before is liking all of her pics >message him and ask him to please leave my family alone, that I miss my wife and child >he blocks me immediately I thought I was a good man with a happy family. The light has been shot out of my life, I have been crying for 3 days straight to the point I throw up. I can't eat, I can barely sleep. Why does this s--- happen. I just want my family back.
: Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)16:50:13 No.913096396 393 KB JPG >with same women for 7 years >things are going great in our relationship >married with one kid >sex life is great >money is great >she's happy everyday >constantly buy her gifts, take her on vacation, spoil her to the max >love my family and find peace in it >3 weeks ago she starts acting weird >starts being quiet and distant >starts to ignore my texts >tells me she deleted Facebook >I ask if she's okay, which is ignored >I offer to pay for therapy if she's depressed, to take her on a date, to go on a trip anything to cheer her up >she says no >fast forward to Thursday I come home >she isn't there >her stuff is gone too >same with my child >call her a dozen times with no answer >finally hours later I get a call from her >she explains to me that she started dating someone else while I was out working and she wants to give him a chance >says she needs time away from me and when I start to cry she tells me "we're not doing this right now" and hangs up >suspicious she blocked me of Facebook so I make an alt account >found her profile and I was correct >same guy I never met before is liking all of her pics >message him and ask him to please leave my family alone, that I miss my wife and child >he blocks me immediately I thought I was a good man with a happy family. The light has been shot out of my life, I have been crying for 3 days straight to the point I throw up. I can't eat, I can barely sleep. Why does this s--- happen. I just want my family back.

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Anon does a bit of gazemaxxing | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Who else is gazemaxxing? 01/28/24(Sun)14:53:00 No.76276258 >apply a very light amount of mascara and eyeliner >keep a slight squint >make sure to keep just a little bit of eyebags >maintain unbreaking eye contact with people until they look away first >tilt your head a little bit downwards and look up with your eyes >learn subtle face movements and what they mean Congrats you can now hypnotize people with your gaze. Caution: This will cause women to instantly wet their f------ panties and throw themselves onto you. 1.32 MB PNG
Anonymous Who else is gazemaxxing? 01/28/24(Sun)14:53:00 No.76276258 >apply a very light amount of mascara and eyeliner >keep a slight squint >make sure to keep just a little bit of eyebags >maintain unbreaking eye contact with people until they look away first >tilt your head a little bit downwards and look up with your eyes >learn subtle face movements and what they mean Congrats you can now hypnotize people with your gaze. Caution: This will cause women to instantly wet their f------ panties and throw themselves onto you. 1.32 MB PNG

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Anon discovers why ninjas aren't cool | /r/Greentext

Being a ninja isn't cool anymore Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)21:07:00 No.913102938 >Be me >Wayward kid of the 80s >Dad's an alcoholic who hates me and calls me queer >Mom's a w---- who's snorts cocaine off of men's asses. >Outside all the time >No friends. >Suddenly meet new friends >Tell me they think I'm kickass and invite me to their club. >Suspicious but don't wanna go home. >Follow them anyway >Big warehouse with bitchin' arcade games, billiard tables, and some kid smoking a cigar. >Other kids think I'm cool. >Weeks pass >Dad still hates me, Mom still a w----. >Go to clubhouse >Friends tell me this adult came by and wants to speak to me and my friends. >Guy says we're cool and gives us rad ninja outfits and weapons >Fuckyeah.jpg >Guy trains us then tells us to go stand out in an alleyway to guard it. >About to tell my friend that he saved my life >Friend then eviscerated by a big ass turtle with two swords. >FML as another pizza-smelling turtle smacks me in the head with a stick.
Being a ninja isn't cool anymore Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)21:07:00 No.913102938 >Be me >Wayward kid of the 80s >Dad's an alcoholic who hates me and calls me queer >Mom's a w---- who's snorts cocaine off of men's asses. >Outside all the time >No friends. >Suddenly meet new friends >Tell me they think I'm kickass and invite me to their club. >Suspicious but don't wanna go home. >Follow them anyway >Big warehouse with bitchin' arcade games, billiard tables, and some kid smoking a cigar. >Other kids think I'm cool. >Weeks pass >Dad still hates me, Mom still a w----. >Go to clubhouse >Friends tell me this adult came by and wants to speak to me and my friends. >Guy says we're cool and gives us rad ninja outfits and weapons >Fuckyeah.jpg >Guy trains us then tells us to go stand out in an alleyway to guard it. >About to tell my friend that he saved my life >Friend then eviscerated by a big ass turtle with two swords. >FML as another pizza-smelling turtle smacks me in the head with a stick.

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Dr healthy gamer anon | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 277 KB PNG 01/28/24(Sun)19:11:01 No.76278936 >today we're gonna talk about why you can't talk to women >the reason you can't talk to women is because you haven't been taught how to talk to women! >society tells us "dude just talk to women" but we've never learned how to actually talk to women, so of course we don't know how to talk to women >anyway the yogis came up with this term called "dikcok" Why do people watch this guy again?
Anonymous 277 KB PNG 01/28/24(Sun)19:11:01 No.76278936 >today we're gonna talk about why you can't talk to women >the reason you can't talk to women is because you haven't been taught how to talk to women! >society tells us "dude just talk to women" but we've never learned how to actually talk to women, so of course we don't know how to talk to women >anyway the yogis came up with this term called "dikcok" Why do people watch this guy again?

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Anon's getting delusional again, he never kissed anyone yet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 43 KB JPG 12/13/23(Wed)16:49:59 No.910765317 Oh boy, I sure am enjoying playing my favorite game, Cyberpunk 2077! > Kiss Panam > Watch my character get more action than I've had in the past 18 months. The loneliness is getting unbearable. I think I've forgotten what it feels like to kiss. 4 Replies >>910766973 # View Thread : Anonymous >>910765317 (OP) # 18 months .... wooooooaaaaaah zomg thats like forever or something....right..... 12/13/23(Wed)17:12:35 No.910765816
: Anonymous 43 KB JPG 12/13/23(Wed)16:49:59 No.910765317 Oh boy, I sure am enjoying playing my favorite game, Cyberpunk 2077! > Kiss Panam > Watch my character get more action than I've had in the past 18 months. The loneliness is getting unbearable. I think I've forgotten what it feels like to kiss. 4 Replies >>910766973 # View Thread : Anonymous >>910765317 (OP) # 18 months .... wooooooaaaaaah zomg thats like forever or something....right..... 12/13/23(Wed)17:12:35 No.910765816

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If its so good where's TF3 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/29/24(Mon) 05:52:08 No.665292460 TEAM FORTRESS 2 Team-Fortress-2-logo.png 116 KB PNG >2024 >Still one of a kind >Still unmatched >Still enjoyable 17 years later >Still one of the best and most refined FPS experiences you can have on a PC How did they do that?
: Anonymous 01/29/24(Mon) 05:52:08 No.665292460 TEAM FORTRESS 2 Team-Fortress-2-logo.png 116 KB PNG >2024 >Still one of a kind >Still unmatched >Still enjoyable 17 years later >Still one of the best and most refined FPS experiences you can have on a PC How did they do that?

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Anon achieves freedom | /r/Greentext

45 KB JPG >Gf tries starting a huge argument with me on my birthday >At some point something just clicks in my brain >Hang up the phone and block her on everything >Enjoy the rest of the day with my family What is the name of this feeling?
45 KB JPG >Gf tries starting a huge argument with me on my birthday >At some point something just clicks in my brain >Hang up the phone and block her on everything >Enjoy the rest of the day with my family What is the name of this feeling?

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Anon helps the less fortunate | /r/Greentext

File: comdlpng6970006.jpg (47 KB, 350x338) how do I live with myself anymore? Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)13:45:49 No.30645053 >be me >incel >therapist suggests I volunteer with the less fortunate to help me contextualize just how good my life is and hopefully improve my self esteem so I stop pitying myself >therapist signs me up for adult mentor volunteer for group home for retards >most of them have physical disabilities ontop of mental disabilities >meet dave >he looks like the stereotype of someone with down syndrome but with the added factor of him being a burn victim and having a stutter >volunteer there for a few weeks when dave comes up >hey anon h-how c...c...come you don't have a wife? >explain i havent found any woman interested in me >well what about a girlfriend? wh-when w-was the last time you had a gf? >explain to him i never had a gf before >wow anon I've g...g..gotten p---- like 100 times before. I get my d--- wet every week are you r-really saying you never got laid before? >tfw when a literal retarded mongoloid is roasting you for being a virgin
File: comdlpng6970006.jpg (47 KB, 350x338) how do I live with myself anymore? Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)13:45:49 No.30645053 >be me >incel >therapist suggests I volunteer with the less fortunate to help me contextualize just how good my life is and hopefully improve my self esteem so I stop pitying myself >therapist signs me up for adult mentor volunteer for group home for retards >most of them have physical disabilities ontop of mental disabilities >meet dave >he looks like the stereotype of someone with down syndrome but with the added factor of him being a burn victim and having a stutter >volunteer there for a few weeks when dave comes up >hey anon h-how c...c...come you don't have a wife? >explain i havent found any woman interested in me >well what about a girlfriend? wh-when w-was the last time you had a gf? >explain to him i never had a gf before >wow anon I've g...g..gotten p---- like 100 times before. I get my d--- wet every week are you r-really saying you never got laid before? >tfw when a literal retarded mongoloid is roasting you for being a virgin

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Harry Potter and The Goon Paper of Secrets | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/26/24(Fri)11:33:16 No.195585025 Oeec9d2a311b2ec52327029fb059ad5bb669b856_hq.jpg 24 KB JPG >You are expelled from Hogwarts for using magic in front of a muggle. Said the talking, floating envelope in front of 3 muggles. >>195585152 # >>195588856 # : Anonymous >>195585025 (OP) # Ok but I would though. Just imagine some bratty goth origami lips trying to scold you while gagging on your c---. 01/26/24(Fri)11:35:37 No.195585125
: Anonymous 01/26/24(Fri)11:33:16 No.195585025 Oeec9d2a311b2ec52327029fb059ad5bb669b856_hq.jpg 24 KB JPG >You are expelled from Hogwarts for using magic in front of a muggle. Said the talking, floating envelope in front of 3 muggles. >>195585152 # >>195588856 # : Anonymous >>195585025 (OP) # Ok but I would though. Just imagine some bratty goth origami lips trying to scold you while gagging on your c---. 01/26/24(Fri)11:35:37 No.195585125

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Anon watches the Bazinga show | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)13:50:57 No.76275661 >3 white friends constantly s--- on the poojeet. the Bic BANG >Parents s--- on him for possibly THEORY 22 KB JPG being a f--. >Parents frequently give him mail- order brides from shitndia. >Brides leave him once it's clear he's a beta f--. >Openly thirsts after his friends wives/gf. >By the end of the show the 3 white friends are married and have successful careers. >The poojeet remains single and lives in a friends garage. What did the writers mean by this?
: Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)13:50:57 No.76275661 >3 white friends constantly s--- on the poojeet. the Bic BANG >Parents s--- on him for possibly THEORY 22 KB JPG being a f--. >Parents frequently give him mail- order brides from shitndia. >Brides leave him once it's clear he's a beta f--. >Openly thirsts after his friends wives/gf. >By the end of the show the 3 white friends are married and have successful careers. >The poojeet remains single and lives in a friends garage. What did the writers mean by this?

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Anon almost experiences South Park | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)20:19:50 No.913079589 33 KB JPG >feelsbad.png >be me >11 y/o >fat 15 year old highschooler (looks like eric cartman) asks me to come to his house >say yeah >ask mom >mom says no 4 years later >realize i was almost r---- >mfw
Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)20:19:50 No.913079589 33 KB JPG >feelsbad.png >be me >11 y/o >fat 15 year old highschooler (looks like eric cartman) asks me to come to his house >say yeah >ask mom >mom says no 4 years later >realize i was almost r---- >mfw

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Anon is weird | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 172 KB PNG 01/04/18(Thu)00:49:35 No.42248973 Social f--- up thread? >Be me >Hungry before work >See donut shop and think "f--- it, that sounds pretty good" >Go inside and get a chocolate donut and a chocolate muffin >Cashier says "Wow, lots of chocolate today huh?" >"Haha yeah, I'm the chocolate man from chocolate land." >never return there Why am I like this?
: Anonymous 172 KB PNG 01/04/18(Thu)00:49:35 No.42248973 Social f--- up thread? >Be me >Hungry before work >See donut shop and think "f--- it, that sounds pretty good" >Go inside and get a chocolate donut and a chocolate muffin >Cashier says "Wow, lots of chocolate today huh?" >"Haha yeah, I'm the chocolate man from chocolate land." >never return there Why am I like this?

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anon has a question | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 459 KB JPG 01/28/24(Sun)23:58:27 No.665257045 >>665256781 # >Half of the new SCPs are just queer reality benders with gender dysphoria >The foundation spent a s--- ton of resources sucking their d--- Why don't they just make clef decommisson them? Isn't that literally half of his job?
: Anonymous 459 KB JPG 01/28/24(Sun)23:58:27 No.665257045 >>665256781 # >Half of the new SCPs are just queer reality benders with gender dysphoria >The foundation spent a s--- ton of resources sucking their d--- Why don't they just make clef decommisson them? Isn't that literally half of his job?

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Anon lives in metropolis | /r/Greentext

Miguel Mendonca >Move to Metropolis >Nice place, sun feels good >Actually enjoy being outside for once >Occasionally see Superman fly over head >I wave >He waves back >Feel safe >Sitting on park bench outside my building >See Superman fight giant Lexcorp robot >Wonder how Lex Luthor hasn't been jailed yet >Superman picks up car >Yeets it at Lex bot Replies >Misses >Watch 3,000 lbs of steel fly through my living room window >Mfw did not have renters insurance on Thu Like Reply 131 MAC Berlinda McBerlin Pls post the mfw image for clarity on Thu Like Reply 1 Miguel Mendonca on Thu Write a reply... Like Reply 10 D GIF a Rules
Miguel Mendonca >Move to Metropolis >Nice place, sun feels good >Actually enjoy being outside for once >Occasionally see Superman fly over head >I wave >He waves back >Feel safe >Sitting on park bench outside my building >See Superman fight giant Lexcorp robot >Wonder how Lex Luthor hasn't been jailed yet >Superman picks up car >Yeets it at Lex bot Replies >Misses >Watch 3,000 lbs of steel fly through my living room window >Mfw did not have renters insurance on Thu Like Reply 131 MAC Berlinda McBerlin Pls post the mfw image for clarity on Thu Like Reply 1 Miguel Mendonca on Thu Write a reply... Like Reply 10 D GIF a Rules

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It stared back | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/27/24(Sat)13:53:20 No.665126605 blackhole.png 137 KB PNG >Take a picture of an acutal black f------ hole in like late 2019. >World od's on crazy pills like a month later What did it mean by this? >>665126979 # >>665127457 # >>665137492 # >>665139173 # >>665139771 # >>665141050 # >>665143258 #
: Anonymous 01/27/24(Sat)13:53:20 No.665126605 blackhole.png 137 KB PNG >Take a picture of an acutal black f------ hole in like late 2019. >World od's on crazy pills like a month later What did it mean by this? >>665126979 # >>665127457 # >>665137492 # >>665139173 # >>665139771 # >>665141050 # >>665143258 #

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Anonette is fat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/28/16(Sun)00:43:16 No.30993198 68 KB PNG Yes I am f------ ugly. I am 387lbs with AA breasts, acne, bad hairline etc. Even myfamily makes fun of me For example my dad started calling me 'the 5th female ghostbuster' because apparently 'I look like one of those fat d---- in the s--- new movie'. He even started leaving bedsheets around the house and asking why I wasn't 'busting those ghosts' when I ignored them I won't ever be happy. I am a f------ monstrosity. It is my fauly of course, my mother is beautiful. another joke from my dad is 'boys often look at a womans mother before deciding if he should marry her, any boy you find will have to look at your mother just to get an erection; >>30993235 # >>30993291 # >>30994236 # >>30996470 # >>30997480 # >>30997518 # >>30997542 # >>30998079 # >>30998138 # >>30998945 # >>31001909 #
: Anonymous 08/28/16(Sun)00:43:16 No.30993198 68 KB PNG Yes I am f------ ugly. I am 387lbs with AA breasts, acne, bad hairline etc. Even myfamily makes fun of me For example my dad started calling me 'the 5th female ghostbuster' because apparently 'I look like one of those fat d---- in the s--- new movie'. He even started leaving bedsheets around the house and asking why I wasn't 'busting those ghosts' when I ignored them I won't ever be happy. I am a f------ monstrosity. It is my fauly of course, my mother is beautiful. another joke from my dad is 'boys often look at a womans mother before deciding if he should marry her, any boy you find will have to look at your mother just to get an erection; >>30993235 # >>30993291 # >>30994236 # >>30996470 # >>30997480 # >>30997518 # >>30997542 # >>30998079 # >>30998138 # >>30998945 # >>31001909 #

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PC Master Race | /r/Greentext

File: Screenshot_20240128_11322(...).jpg (270 KB, 1080x1033) January 22, 2024-1 min read SONY CEO SAYS PLAYSTATION'S GAMING FUTURE WILL BE ON PC, MOBILE, AND CLOUD SONY Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)21:34:52 No.665237992 [Reply] >>665241079 >>665238563 >>665238683 >>665239727 >>665240196 >>665240617 Is PC now the ultimate platform for people who actually likes games? >Gets all Microsoft games >Gets all Sony games >Can emulate all Switch games >Can play or emulate every single game title from the past 40 years (consoles today don't even have backwards compatibility) Seriously, if you like gaming, why the hell would you not get a PC? Showing all replies. Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)21:36:19 No.665238046 ► >>665238621 >>665239228 >>665240687 We PChuds don't want snoyschlop.
File: Screenshot_20240128_11322(...).jpg (270 KB, 1080x1033) January 22, 2024-1 min read SONY CEO SAYS PLAYSTATION'S GAMING FUTURE WILL BE ON PC, MOBILE, AND CLOUD SONY Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)21:34:52 No.665237992 [Reply] >>665241079 >>665238563 >>665238683 >>665239727 >>665240196 >>665240617 Is PC now the ultimate platform for people who actually likes games? >Gets all Microsoft games >Gets all Sony games >Can emulate all Switch games >Can play or emulate every single game title from the past 40 years (consoles today don't even have backwards compatibility) Seriously, if you like gaming, why the hell would you not get a PC? Showing all replies. Anonymous 01/28/24(Sun)21:36:19 No.665238046 ► >>665238621 >>665239228 >>665240687 We PChuds don't want snoyschlop.

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Anon fights for Freedom | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/14/23(Sat)08:09:36 No.190945441 image-20150219-28184-1rxsqvq.jpg 54 KB JPG >got a poor goat herder defending his family from invaders at 12 o clock >I'm taking the shot
: Anonymous 10/14/23(Sat)08:09:36 No.190945441 image-20150219-28184-1rxsqvq.jpg 54 KB JPG >got a poor goat herder defending his family from invaders at 12 o clock >I'm taking the shot

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