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Even further from home | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/25/16(Tue)20:11:08 No.75697195 hqdefault 0.jpg 11 KB JPG >oh, you're sad because a girl at your high-school doesn't like you back? Peter, when I was your age, I left school to bullseye g---- from a helicopter in the middle of some god forsaken jungle. Don't tell me you have it hard because you're a pathetic kissless virgin. You can act sad when you have to leave behind the lady-boy you fell in love with and made passionate steamy love to in a collapsing bamboo shack, just like I did. You think I felt good about firebombing his chink village and watching our f----hut burn to the ground? We were going to build our lives together there, Peter! You know what? F--- you. Get the f--- out of my car. >>75697234 # >>75697332 # >>75698895 # >75702735 #
: Anonymous 10/25/16(Tue)20:11:08 No.75697195 hqdefault 0.jpg 11 KB JPG >oh, you're sad because a girl at your high-school doesn't like you back? Peter, when I was your age, I left school to bullseye g---- from a helicopter in the middle of some god forsaken jungle. Don't tell me you have it hard because you're a pathetic kissless virgin. You can act sad when you have to leave behind the lady-boy you fell in love with and made passionate steamy love to in a collapsing bamboo shack, just like I did. You think I felt good about firebombing his chink village and watching our f----hut burn to the ground? We were going to build our lives together there, Peter! You know what? F--- you. Get the f--- out of my car. >>75697234 # >>75697332 # >>75698895 # >75702735 #

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Short and stout | /r/Greentext


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Me when the when | /r/Greentext

atom] [Update] Auto] Ing (18 KB, 389x389) IAnonymous 05/ >have "problem" >don't care >have no problem Life is literally so easy.
atom] [Update] Auto] Ing (18 KB, 389x389) IAnonymous 05/ >have "problem" >don't care >have no problem Life is literally so easy.

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Anon was molested. | /r/Greentext

No. 868895110 56 minutes ago 5C939776-ECA8-4006-8823-7291B153ED8D.jpg JPG 89.6 KİB 462x518 >be me >be 12 >in a kindergarten to 12th grade school >end up meeting girl because we both do archery >we become nearly instantly friends and start hanging out after school >always goto her house because she had a PlayStation and I didn't >played a lot of ddr together >always usually had a lot of moments where she told me to lay on her lap or have her brush against me >didn't see a problem with it at the time fast forward a few months >13 now >still hang out almost every day >end up staying the night because my dad couldn't pick me up because the roads were way to icy >stay up late as her parents weren't home >end up getting ready to pass out on the couch >"Oh, anon you can sleep in my room" >cool, don't have to sleep on the couch >end up getting into bed with her >she says she's just going to quickly get ready for bed >basically just takes her clothes off aside from her underwear >don't see a problem, still don't know what jacking off or sex is >she ends up touching me and eventually I end up cooming >felt scared and weird the entire time >every day for two years after whenever we would hang out she would bring me somewhere secluded or alone and jerk me off and make fun of how small my penis was >fast forward to today >remember >feel terrible and disgusted because I had no idea what was happening Was this really as bad as I feel it was?
No. 868895110 56 minutes ago 5C939776-ECA8-4006-8823-7291B153ED8D.jpg JPG 89.6 KİB 462x518 >be me >be 12 >in a kindergarten to 12th grade school >end up meeting girl because we both do archery >we become nearly instantly friends and start hanging out after school >always goto her house because she had a PlayStation and I didn't >played a lot of ddr together >always usually had a lot of moments where she told me to lay on her lap or have her brush against me >didn't see a problem with it at the time fast forward a few months >13 now >still hang out almost every day >end up staying the night because my dad couldn't pick me up because the roads were way to icy >stay up late as her parents weren't home >end up getting ready to pass out on the couch >"Oh, anon you can sleep in my room" >cool, don't have to sleep on the couch >end up getting into bed with her >she says she's just going to quickly get ready for bed >basically just takes her clothes off aside from her underwear >don't see a problem, still don't know what jacking off or sex is >she ends up touching me and eventually I end up cooming >felt scared and weird the entire time >every day for two years after whenever we would hang out she would bring me somewhere secluded or alone and jerk me off and make fun of how small my penis was >fast forward to today >remember >feel terrible and disgusted because I had no idea what was happening Was this really as bad as I feel it was?

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Anon proves the wrong point | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)11:08:54 No.581852657 >specifically designed to kill Jedi >not even one Jedi was killed by it 97 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)11:10:32 No.581852794 your penis was designed to reproduce yet not even one girl has been f----- by it >>581852882 # >>581852907 # >>581853461 # >>581853567 # >>581853720 # >>581853840 # >>581854234 #
: Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)11:08:54 No.581852657 >specifically designed to kill Jedi >not even one Jedi was killed by it 97 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)11:10:32 No.581852794 your penis was designed to reproduce yet not even one girl has been f----- by it >>581852882 # >>581852907 # >>581853461 # >>581853567 # >>581853720 # >>581853840 # >>581854234 #

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By every metric | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/19/21(Sun)06:00:48 No.868894586 >be me >179cm >world is basically designed for MASTER me >not noticeably short except next to exceptionally tall people >still larger than the vast majority of women and about half of all 133 KB PNG men >medium size clothes are always carried >don't hit my head on things but also can reach s--- How the f--- do people come to the conclusion there's a better height than this : Anonymous 12/19/21(Sun)06:03:24 No.868894667 >>868894586 (OP) # w-- is a cm 112 KB JPG
: Anonymous 12/19/21(Sun)06:00:48 No.868894586 >be me >179cm >world is basically designed for MASTER me >not noticeably short except next to exceptionally tall people >still larger than the vast majority of women and about half of all 133 KB PNG men >medium size clothes are always carried >don't hit my head on things but also can reach s--- How the f--- do people come to the conclusion there's a better height than this : Anonymous 12/19/21(Sun)06:03:24 No.868894667 >>868894586 (OP) # w-- is a cm 112 KB JPG

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The Covid Lifestyle | /r/Greentext

253243234554.jpg 18 KB JPG >open steam library >stare at games >open chrome >"google.com" >stare at screen >"youtube.com" >scroll down >close browser >stare at desktop icons of games >open steam library >repeat for 3 hours until it's socially acceptable to start making noise
253243234554.jpg 18 KB JPG >open steam library >stare at games >open chrome >"google.com" >stare at screen >"youtube.com" >scroll down >close browser >stare at desktop icons of games >open steam library >repeat for 3 hours until it's socially acceptable to start making noise

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Anon Loves His Grandma | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)22:44:50 No.66607612 >Age >Gender >Favorite p--- category 9 KB JPG Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)23:01:33 No.66607808 >>66607612_(OP). >22 >Male >Granny 980 KB GIF
Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)22:44:50 No.66607612 >Age >Gender >Favorite p--- category 9 KB JPG Anonymous 12/17/21(Fri)23:01:33 No.66607808 >>66607612_(OP). >22 >Male >Granny 980 KB GIF

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Anon gets confused | /r/Greentext

U Anonymous 07/29/17(Sat)01:13:10 No.740411492 >>740410281 (OP) # >be me >have a girlfriend who is a twin >got confused one day >ended up f------ the dad
U Anonymous 07/29/17(Sat)01:13:10 No.740411492 >>740410281 (OP) # >be me >have a girlfriend who is a twin >got confused one day >ended up f------ the dad

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Anon is old | /r/Greentext

>1990 was 32 years ago 33m (12/18 17:06) · 66616949 JPG 235KB · (1 I|| X |142) »66616940 (OP) >32 was 1990 years ago ...
>1990 was 32 years ago 33m (12/18 17:06) · 66616949 JPG 235KB · (1 I|| X |142) »66616940 (OP) >32 was 1990 years ago ...

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Anon larps as a dog | /r/Greentext

: Woof 04/16/21(Fri)06:54:42 No.63235535 >be me, dog in a white American family >every day my f----- of an owner takes me outside when I just wanna s--- in the house >makes me poop on the grass and 54 KB JPG walk around the same block a million times >throws a stick and makes me get it for him >mfw when the second I give him the stick the tard throws it again Doganons, are human owners autistic? Should I just take the streetdogpill : Anonymous 04/16/21(Fri)07:18:07 No.63235797 >be dog >owner is white woman >tfw she makes me do unspeakable things to her dont trust the peanut butter bros... 5 KB JPG
: Woof 04/16/21(Fri)06:54:42 No.63235535 >be me, dog in a white American family >every day my f----- of an owner takes me outside when I just wanna s--- in the house >makes me poop on the grass and 54 KB JPG walk around the same block a million times >throws a stick and makes me get it for him >mfw when the second I give him the stick the tard throws it again Doganons, are human owners autistic? Should I just take the streetdogpill : Anonymous 04/16/21(Fri)07:18:07 No.63235797 >be dog >owner is white woman >tfw she makes me do unspeakable things to her dont trust the peanut butter bros... 5 KB JPG

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Anon no longer possesses virginity | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/23/19(Wed)21:25:10 No.790753828 >Girl looks at me >The image of me is now pulsing through her neurons >Technically am inside her >Later virgins 29 KB JPG
: Anonymous 01/23/19(Wed)21:25:10 No.790753828 >Girl looks at me >The image of me is now pulsing through her neurons >Technically am inside her >Later virgins 29 KB JPG

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Specious and Homosexual | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/07/20(Sat)13:25:40 No.839527345 >Be me >Make tendies >Mom working >Give mom some tendies "Thanks anon love you" Love you too mom 62 KB PNG 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 11/07/20(Sat)13:25:40 No.839527345 >Be me >Make tendies >Mom working >Give mom some tendies "Thanks anon love you" Love you too mom 62 KB PNG 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon is in a predicament | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/18/21(Sat)17:40:01 No.23651468 >trans lesbian >only want a cis lesbian gf >cis lesbians also only want cis lesbian gf Should I actually commit suicide? l'll never be loved or wanted and if I even attempt to talk to a cis lesbian l'll be seen as a 20 KB JPG monster. Why should I even live?
: Anonymous 12/18/21(Sat)17:40:01 No.23651468 >trans lesbian >only want a cis lesbian gf >cis lesbians also only want cis lesbian gf Should I actually commit suicide? l'll never be loved or wanted and if I even attempt to talk to a cis lesbian l'll be seen as a 20 KB JPG monster. Why should I even live?

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Anon is good guy | /r/Greentext

post stories when you got f----- for doing the right thing >be me >22 unifag >at party >s-------- girl tries to take me upstairs 158 KB JPG >refuse because dont want to r--- >she gets p----- >with the force of a thousand tards she punches me and breaks my jaw >in rehab for months because i turned down drunk p---- dont f------ laugh at me anons. its super f------ easy to break a jaw if you get lucky
post stories when you got f----- for doing the right thing >be me >22 unifag >at party >s-------- girl tries to take me upstairs 158 KB JPG >refuse because dont want to r--- >she gets p----- >with the force of a thousand tards she punches me and breaks my jaw >in rehab for months because i turned down drunk p---- dont f------ laugh at me anons. its super f------ easy to break a jaw if you get lucky

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Anon hates nostalgia | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)05:55:53 No.63077012 >DUDE DO YOU REMEMBER 2XXX or 1XXX I MISS MY CHILDHOOD SO MUCH BROS WHY CAN'T IT BE LIKE THE OLD DAY- 81 KB JPG SHUT THE F--- UP. I hate nostalgia tards so much. You know how tony soprano says that remember when is the lowest form of conversation? He is f------ correct, I literally cannot stand the amount of nostalgic sentiment on the internet and even IRL. F--- OFF. : Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)05:58:48 No.63077044 >>63077012 (OP) # Do you remember when op wasnt a f-----? Yeah me neither. 185 KB PNG
: Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)05:55:53 No.63077012 >DUDE DO YOU REMEMBER 2XXX or 1XXX I MISS MY CHILDHOOD SO MUCH BROS WHY CAN'T IT BE LIKE THE OLD DAY- 81 KB JPG SHUT THE F--- UP. I hate nostalgia tards so much. You know how tony soprano says that remember when is the lowest form of conversation? He is f------ correct, I literally cannot stand the amount of nostalgic sentiment on the internet and even IRL. F--- OFF. : Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)05:58:48 No.63077044 >>63077012 (OP) # Do you remember when op wasnt a f-----? Yeah me neither. 185 KB PNG

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Anon goes full Potato | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/24/13(Sun)19:45:44 UTC-5 No.6215899 9 Replies: >>6215917 >>6214437 (OP) >Eating sandwich at beach >Skipping stones >Watching the sunset and thinking about life >Throw sandwich into ocean >Bite rock people saw
Anonymous 03/24/13(Sun)19:45:44 UTC-5 No.6215899 9 Replies: >>6215917 >>6214437 (OP) >Eating sandwich at beach >Skipping stones >Watching the sunset and thinking about life >Throw sandwich into ocean >Bite rock people saw

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Anon's grandpa killed fiddy men | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/14/10(Wed)18:49 No.66942573 File :1279147765740.jpg-(18 KB, 167x237, jesusfuckingchristfledgeling.jpg) >Grandfather watching me play Far Cry 2 >It's raining, and I'm in the middle of the jungle, trying to revive a fallen partner >"Keep trying, son" >I keep trying to revive him, but he dies anyway >Grandfather mutters "Aw s--- this brings me back. Son of a bitch." >my face S---, I'm sorry, grandpa
Anonymous 07/14/10(Wed)18:49 No.66942573 File :1279147765740.jpg-(18 KB, 167x237, jesusfuckingchristfledgeling.jpg) >Grandfather watching me play Far Cry 2 >It's raining, and I'm in the middle of the jungle, trying to revive a fallen partner >"Keep trying, son" >I keep trying to revive him, but he dies anyway >Grandfather mutters "Aw s--- this brings me back. Son of a bitch." >my face S---, I'm sorry, grandpa

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Anon Goes To The Bank | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/18/21(Sat)20:54:47 No.868873452 >Be me >Going to a bank to cash a check for the first time in years >Wearing black shirt, baggy sweatpants, and a black beanie >Walk up to lady working at the counter, she's busy but notices me >Jumps a bit before laughing nervously 19 KB JPG >"Jeez, is that you Anon? It's been awhile, I thought you were a robber for a second!" >Try to come up with a clever comeback to ease tension >"The only way l'd rob a place is if it were a sperm bank!" >She doesn't laugh >People around me look at me, a few people I know even >All disgusted >Quickly cash check and run out Am I autistic, Anons?
: Anonymous 12/18/21(Sat)20:54:47 No.868873452 >Be me >Going to a bank to cash a check for the first time in years >Wearing black shirt, baggy sweatpants, and a black beanie >Walk up to lady working at the counter, she's busy but notices me >Jumps a bit before laughing nervously 19 KB JPG >"Jeez, is that you Anon? It's been awhile, I thought you were a robber for a second!" >Try to come up with a clever comeback to ease tension >"The only way l'd rob a place is if it were a sperm bank!" >She doesn't laugh >People around me look at me, a few people I know even >All disgusted >Quickly cash check and run out Am I autistic, Anons?

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Gimme a K! Gimme a Y! Gimme a... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/29/17(Wed)20:46:20 No.41441199 My life is an /r9k/ meme >nerd and outcast all my life >ignore women completely because they ignore me >start making money as 108 KB JPG web engineer for Yahoo >eventually find cute girl that seems to care about me >Get married 2006 Fast forward to last year >have 3 kids, one 10, one 8, and one 7 >oldest son plays baseball, really loves it. Athletic, highest grades in class. >Middle girl also plays sports and gets great grades >youngest son isn't doing so well. Bullied at school, somehow overweight, screams over the tiniest things >in December my wife tells me that my oldest two kids aren't mine >they're actually my former boss's So what do I do here? Kill myself, I guess?
: Anonymous 11/29/17(Wed)20:46:20 No.41441199 My life is an /r9k/ meme >nerd and outcast all my life >ignore women completely because they ignore me >start making money as 108 KB JPG web engineer for Yahoo >eventually find cute girl that seems to care about me >Get married 2006 Fast forward to last year >have 3 kids, one 10, one 8, and one 7 >oldest son plays baseball, really loves it. Athletic, highest grades in class. >Middle girl also plays sports and gets great grades >youngest son isn't doing so well. Bullied at school, somehow overweight, screams over the tiniest things >in December my wife tells me that my oldest two kids aren't mine >they're actually my former boss's So what do I do here? Kill myself, I guess?

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