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anon in highschool | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/06/21(Wed)13:39:26 No.61737841 > be me > in highschool > accidentally bump into girl in the hallway > she says "ew" > mfw this happens on multiple occasions > mfw they aren't even trying to be mean, its just a gut reaction > 54 KB JPG one girl was even very sweet and apologetic. She said she was sorry and it just slipped out. i said it was fine and i continued my way to class. what henious crimes must i have committed in a past life to deserve this? is this punishment for prior sins?
: Anonymous 01/06/21(Wed)13:39:26 No.61737841 > be me > in highschool > accidentally bump into girl in the hallway > she says "ew" > mfw this happens on multiple occasions > mfw they aren't even trying to be mean, its just a gut reaction > 54 KB JPG one girl was even very sweet and apologetic. She said she was sorry and it just slipped out. i said it was fine and i continued my way to class. what henious crimes must i have committed in a past life to deserve this? is this punishment for prior sins?

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anon does an oopsie daisie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)19:09:53 No.66457973 >listening to music with my c--- out again 539 KB PNG
: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)19:09:53 No.66457973 >listening to music with my c--- out again 539 KB PNG

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anon makes a discovery | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/07/21(Tue)05:55:10 No.868146754 >almost completely unregulated >incompatible with traffic jams >no note >no insurance needed >no license needed >fuel it with determination and whatever 148 KB JPG you ate for breakfast this morning >probably one of the most fuel-efficient vehicles in existence, come to think of it >goes as far and as fast as you can >no need for parking lots, just leave it anywhere there is a secure structure you can attach it to >and even if someone does steal it, it's so inexpensive you could literally just buy another no problem >physically improves you while you use it >plain ol' fun >minimal environmental impact >collisions are significantly less likely to kill or even injure >if entire cities were designed around these the way they are with cars, everyone would be fine with it >doesn't even need seatbelts why is the automobile viewed as the ultimate symbol of freedom again?
: Anonymous 12/07/21(Tue)05:55:10 No.868146754 >almost completely unregulated >incompatible with traffic jams >no note >no insurance needed >no license needed >fuel it with determination and whatever 148 KB JPG you ate for breakfast this morning >probably one of the most fuel-efficient vehicles in existence, come to think of it >goes as far and as fast as you can >no need for parking lots, just leave it anywhere there is a secure structure you can attach it to >and even if someone does steal it, it's so inexpensive you could literally just buy another no problem >physically improves you while you use it >plain ol' fun >minimal environmental impact >collisions are significantly less likely to kill or even injure >if entire cities were designed around these the way they are with cars, everyone would be fine with it >doesn't even need seatbelts why is the automobile viewed as the ultimate symbol of freedom again?

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anon has a theory | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Assortative Mating 12/06/21(Mon)19:50:51 No.66458528 Over the last 25 years something new has been noted Disabling pars of the brain with ur per agraw surie chang de te immigrastudy >only highly religious people are reproducing at above replacement levels >In the religious groups as lQ goes up fertility goes up In non-religious groups as IQ goes up Mc ee er el 1.16 MB PNG fertility goes DOWN >As global telecommunications gets better high IQ women increasingly only marry high IQ men >men with high mutational load (i.e. Iow genetic value) increasingly only match with high mutational load women *IF AT ALL*. >The increase in virginity in men and women is a combination of: >A) high IQ men &women with low mutational load (i.e., high genetic value) are increasingly religious and only mating with close peers, and >B) men and women with high mutational load are not mating AT ALL the result? >By 2200 the world will be 15% tall, handsome, religious, high IQ men and women wo only marry each other and >85% short, ugly mutants that are atheists working as drones
: Anonymous Assortative Mating 12/06/21(Mon)19:50:51 No.66458528 Over the last 25 years something new has been noted Disabling pars of the brain with ur per agraw surie chang de te immigrastudy >only highly religious people are reproducing at above replacement levels >In the religious groups as lQ goes up fertility goes up In non-religious groups as IQ goes up Mc ee er el 1.16 MB PNG fertility goes DOWN >As global telecommunications gets better high IQ women increasingly only marry high IQ men >men with high mutational load (i.e. Iow genetic value) increasingly only match with high mutational load women *IF AT ALL*. >The increase in virginity in men and women is a combination of: >A) high IQ men &women with low mutational load (i.e., high genetic value) are increasingly religious and only mating with close peers, and >B) men and women with high mutational load are not mating AT ALL the result? >By 2200 the world will be 15% tall, handsome, religious, high IQ men and women wo only marry each other and >85% short, ugly mutants that are atheists working as drones

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Anon is unacceptable even on 4chan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)20:59:33 No.66455167 >never shave d--- and balls >have really gross but warm balls >have a spider nest in my ball pubes >every 2-3 weeks little spiderlings hatch and it feels really funny and tingly >sometimes they go in my pee hole and i have to pee them out and it feels good 44 KB JPG anybody else do this?
: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)20:59:33 No.66455167 >never shave d--- and balls >have really gross but warm balls >have a spider nest in my ball pubes >every 2-3 weeks little spiderlings hatch and it feels really funny and tingly >sometimes they go in my pee hole and i have to pee them out and it feels good 44 KB JPG anybody else do this?

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Anon loves NASCAR | /r/Greentext

12/05/21(Sun)20:03:41 No.868060283 : Anonymous Goodwrench QUICK LUBEpus GM Goodwrench NASCA Winston Cup 7 Tim Champion FOOD CITY 39317312-0E92-43F6-827B-0202CD46D188.jpg 756 KB JPG >Be American Football Fan >Terrible fan community >Complicated rules >Ungrateful idiots paid millions >Be NASCAR fan >loving community every gets along >Easy to follow person in front wins >Good ole' boys work hard drive good to win big
12/05/21(Sun)20:03:41 No.868060283 : Anonymous Goodwrench QUICK LUBEpus GM Goodwrench NASCA Winston Cup 7 Tim Champion FOOD CITY 39317312-0E92-43F6-827B-0202CD46D188.jpg 756 KB JPG >Be American Football Fan >Terrible fan community >Complicated rules >Ungrateful idiots paid millions >Be NASCAR fan >loving community every gets along >Easy to follow person in front wins >Good ole' boys work hard drive good to win big

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Anon watches Rick and Morty | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/07/21(Tue)04:27:07 No.160255429 >Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends the dimensions of time and space. cringe 13 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/07/21(Tue)04:28:23 No.160255469 >>160255429 (OP) # Love is a chemical reaction for breeding >>160255531 # >>160255602 # >>160255655 # >>160255669 # >>160256211# >>160256331 # >>160256379 # >>160256391 # >>160256623 # >>160257246 # >>160257944 # >>160258886 # >>160258999 # >>160261215 # >>160261646 # >>160262796 # >>160263001 # >>160263742 #
: Anonymous 12/07/21(Tue)04:27:07 No.160255429 >Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends the dimensions of time and space. cringe 13 KB JPG : Anonymous 12/07/21(Tue)04:28:23 No.160255469 >>160255429 (OP) # Love is a chemical reaction for breeding >>160255531 # >>160255602 # >>160255655 # >>160255669 # >>160256211# >>160256331 # >>160256379 # >>160256391 # >>160256623 # >>160257246 # >>160257944 # >>160258886 # >>160258999 # >>160261215 # >>160261646 # >>160262796 # >>160263001 # >>160263742 #

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Anon tries to make friends. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous E 12/05/21(Sun)18:57:18 No.66444042 >make eye contact >girls immediately avert their gaze to the floor >guys will either trail off with what they were saying or will size you up as a threat WHAT THE F--- YOU GUYS TOLD ME TO 1.03 MB PNG MAINTAIN EYE CONTACT AND THEY DONT LIKE IT АAAААААААAAAAAAAAААAAAAA : Anonymous 12/05/21(Sun)19:01:37 No.66444112 >>66444042 (OP) # Based. Keep making normies uncomfortable anon. >>66444158 #
: Anonymous E 12/05/21(Sun)18:57:18 No.66444042 >make eye contact >girls immediately avert their gaze to the floor >guys will either trail off with what they were saying or will size you up as a threat WHAT THE F--- YOU GUYS TOLD ME TO 1.03 MB PNG MAINTAIN EYE CONTACT AND THEY DONT LIKE IT АAAААААААAAAAAAAAААAAAAA : Anonymous 12/05/21(Sun)19:01:37 No.66444112 >>66444042 (OP) # Based. Keep making normies uncomfortable anon. >>66444158 #

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Anon almost escapes the simulation | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)22:03:55 No.868136720 >be me as a kid >kicking ass at Pokémon card game at day camp >get bored >for some reason have paper clip >decide to find out why the TV says putting metal in electrical sockets is bad 85 KB PNG >bend out paper clip >slowly enter the hole >a big jolt of what I can only describe as painful vibration hits my body >what lasted maybe .5 seconds felt like an hour >I look around and everything is muffled and slowed down >kind of like a call of duty cut scene >l almost escaped the matrix that day >if only I had held on a little longer
: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)22:03:55 No.868136720 >be me as a kid >kicking ass at Pokémon card game at day camp >get bored >for some reason have paper clip >decide to find out why the TV says putting metal in electrical sockets is bad 85 KB PNG >bend out paper clip >slowly enter the hole >a big jolt of what I can only describe as painful vibration hits my body >what lasted maybe .5 seconds felt like an hour >I look around and everything is muffled and slowed down >kind of like a call of duty cut scene >l almost escaped the matrix that day >if only I had held on a little longer

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Anon discusses philosophy l. | /r/Greentext


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Anon visits earth | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Movie idea 07/29/21(Thu)13:47:06 No.154240634 >aliens come to earth >tell humanity that it must choose one of its races to be eliminated before they share their knowledge and tech >a worldwide anonymous poll is held where you just have to think of which race to get rid of (none is 20 KB JPG an option as well) >plot twist: as the poll ends everyone who voted for a certain race gets a corresponding symbol tattooed on their face >aliens instantly leave without purging anyone or saying a word >chaos ensues
: Anonymous Movie idea 07/29/21(Thu)13:47:06 No.154240634 >aliens come to earth >tell humanity that it must choose one of its races to be eliminated before they share their knowledge and tech >a worldwide anonymous poll is held where you just have to think of which race to get rid of (none is 20 KB JPG an option as well) >plot twist: as the poll ends everyone who voted for a certain race gets a corresponding symbol tattooed on their face >aliens instantly leave without purging anyone or saying a word >chaos ensues

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anon wings it | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)20:28:24 No.66458917 >yes, my finals do start in two days >no, i won't study >no, i haven't studied all semester >i WILL totally wing my finals >i WILL come home and hang myself 56 KB JPG
: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)20:28:24 No.66458917 >yes, my finals do start in two days >no, i won't study >no, i haven't studied all semester >i WILL totally wing my finals >i WILL come home and hang myself 56 KB JPG

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Anon finds a suitor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/03/21(Sat)20:38:30 No.62414397 >>62411966 (OP) # >Covering regular carriers route >Old lady comes out and grabs her mail >oh are you the new carrier >no just covering ks route today 32 KB JPG shes on vaction >oh thats too bad I could get used to seeing you *winks* thats as good as it gets boys
: Anonymous 07/03/21(Sat)20:38:30 No.62414397 >>62411966 (OP) # >Covering regular carriers route >Old lady comes out and grabs her mail >oh are you the new carrier >no just covering ks route today 32 KB JPG shes on vaction >oh thats too bad I could get used to seeing you *winks* thats as good as it gets boys

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anon finds a girl | /r/Greentext

2bf5bd6b395e639ef39b88aff(...).jpg 2 (101 KB, 2000x1125) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)20:32:32 No.66458964 [3] [Reply] v >>66459061 >>66459361 >be me >college coomer >at the library in the manga section >see cute shy girl grabbing a MHA manga >have seen it so know what to talk about >"It's now or never anon" >strike a conversation and it actually goes well >surprised.wav >we exchange our socials >be texting her >she seems really sweet and empathetic and we get along real well >trad wife material so far >be a virgin and assume she is as well >want to make things spicier so ask her what's the wildest thing she has done >she says I should go first so I do >tell her I have masturbated at the manga section at the school library and came inside a Attack On Titan book on a mikasa picture >she laughs and says she's glad that she doesn't read AOT >realize she's probably as much as a sexual degenerate as me which is perfect >tell her it's her turn >she says she once decided to open up and go to a college party and ended up getting DP'd by two blackoids >call her a disgusting slut and block her It's over anons. Every girl is poisoned these days
2bf5bd6b395e639ef39b88aff(...).jpg 2 (101 KB, 2000x1125) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)20:32:32 No.66458964 [3] [Reply] v >>66459061 >>66459361 >be me >college coomer >at the library in the manga section >see cute shy girl grabbing a MHA manga >have seen it so know what to talk about >"It's now or never anon" >strike a conversation and it actually goes well >surprised.wav >we exchange our socials >be texting her >she seems really sweet and empathetic and we get along real well >trad wife material so far >be a virgin and assume she is as well >want to make things spicier so ask her what's the wildest thing she has done >she says I should go first so I do >tell her I have masturbated at the manga section at the school library and came inside a Attack On Titan book on a mikasa picture >she laughs and says she's glad that she doesn't read AOT >realize she's probably as much as a sexual degenerate as me which is perfect >tell her it's her turn >she says she once decided to open up and go to a college party and ended up getting DP'd by two blackoids >call her a disgusting slut and block her It's over anons. Every girl is poisoned these days

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Anon explains sex | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/07/21(Tue)00:10:08 No.66454307 File: 1638693139679.jpg (100 KB, 812x1024) >be me, spergy weird kid, in 1st grade, talking to some older girls I read books with >one of them mentions sex and they all giggle and I'm like "What?" and they make fun of me for not knowing what sex is >tell her I know how sex works >she's horrified and bemused and like, "Oh yeah?" >explain that human cells have a whole copy of a person's DNÁ, and that males have special cells called sperm and women have special cells called eggs, and those are called gametes or sex cells, and those cells only have half a copy of a person's DNA, and sex is when a mommy and a daddy combine their gametes into a fertilized egg which is a single cell with a whole set of genetic instructions made from the two sex cells, and that cell divides multiplies to make a whole baby >she tells me I'm wrong and that sex is when a boy sticks his penis in your vagina >l tell her she's retarded and we get into an argument over this where she brings up dating and boyfriends and making out and I'm trying to explain what inheritance and dominant and recessive traits are >go back to class fuming and genuinely thinking this bitch is a f------ idiot
Anonymous 12/07/21(Tue)00:10:08 No.66454307 File: 1638693139679.jpg (100 KB, 812x1024) >be me, spergy weird kid, in 1st grade, talking to some older girls I read books with >one of them mentions sex and they all giggle and I'm like "What?" and they make fun of me for not knowing what sex is >tell her I know how sex works >she's horrified and bemused and like, "Oh yeah?" >explain that human cells have a whole copy of a person's DNÁ, and that males have special cells called sperm and women have special cells called eggs, and those are called gametes or sex cells, and those cells only have half a copy of a person's DNA, and sex is when a mommy and a daddy combine their gametes into a fertilized egg which is a single cell with a whole set of genetic instructions made from the two sex cells, and that cell divides multiplies to make a whole baby >she tells me I'm wrong and that sex is when a boy sticks his penis in your vagina >l tell her she's retarded and we get into an argument over this where she brings up dating and boyfriends and making out and I'm trying to explain what inheritance and dominant and recessive traits are >go back to class fuming and genuinely thinking this bitch is a f------ idiot

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Anon is a scientist | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/08/21(Mon)01:16:58 No.866297310 So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix. We came to the conclusion that a matrix could only run so smoothly because of our predictable behavior. For example, if you eat it is likely that you will swallow your food. Therefore, the matrix would be ready to initiate a digestion program. But if a group of people did something unpredictable, 41 KB JPG the matrix would have to shut down. So what we did is we randomly started gang banging each other. The matrix could have never predicted that becuase that is like super gay. But nothing happened (matrix-wise). But this is not point why I am writing about this. My friends now want to do the gang-banging s--- again and I am not sure how to respond to that.
: Anonymous 11/08/21(Mon)01:16:58 No.866297310 So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix. We came to the conclusion that a matrix could only run so smoothly because of our predictable behavior. For example, if you eat it is likely that you will swallow your food. Therefore, the matrix would be ready to initiate a digestion program. But if a group of people did something unpredictable, 41 KB JPG the matrix would have to shut down. So what we did is we randomly started gang banging each other. The matrix could have never predicted that becuase that is like super gay. But nothing happened (matrix-wise). But this is not point why I am writing about this. My friends now want to do the gang-banging s--- again and I am not sure how to respond to that.

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Anon is not the bad guy here | /r/Greentext

File: file.png (21 KB, 251x201) Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)09:23:11 No.47829822 >>47829862 >>47829884 >>47829907 >>47829939 >>47829951 >>47829956 >>47829960 >>47830118 >>47830125 >>47830163 >>47830168 >>47830182 >>47830452 >>47830501 >>47830536 >>47830601 >>47830697 >>47830737 >>47830847 >>47830857 >>47831328 >>47832066 >>47832229 >>47832302 >>47832353 >>47832354 >>47832513 >>47832696 >>47833199 >>47833530 >>47833818 >>47833850 >>47834179 >>47834587 >>47834632 >female coworker makes a joke at my expense about something I can't control (being bald) >l make a joke back about something she can control (being fat) >she goes home early and everybody is mad at me How was I the bad guy here? Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)09:56:06 No.47830163 >>47830238 >>47829822 (OP) # What was her joke? And what did you answer? Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)10:06:34 No.47830238 >>47830163 # >broke up with gf a few weeks ago (I ended it) >coworkers were talking about their exes (working with women is Hell) >>Anon, why don't you ever talk s--- about your ex? Didn't she break up with you because you were bald ha ha? >Ha ha, good one. Didn't you have a miscarriage because you're so fat?
File: file.png (21 KB, 251x201) Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)09:23:11 No.47829822 >>47829862 >>47829884 >>47829907 >>47829939 >>47829951 >>47829956 >>47829960 >>47830118 >>47830125 >>47830163 >>47830168 >>47830182 >>47830452 >>47830501 >>47830536 >>47830601 >>47830697 >>47830737 >>47830847 >>47830857 >>47831328 >>47832066 >>47832229 >>47832302 >>47832353 >>47832354 >>47832513 >>47832696 >>47833199 >>47833530 >>47833818 >>47833850 >>47834179 >>47834587 >>47834632 >female coworker makes a joke at my expense about something I can't control (being bald) >l make a joke back about something she can control (being fat) >she goes home early and everybody is mad at me How was I the bad guy here? Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)09:56:06 No.47830163 >>47830238 >>47829822 (OP) # What was her joke? And what did you answer? Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)10:06:34 No.47830238 >>47830163 # >broke up with gf a few weeks ago (I ended it) >coworkers were talking about their exes (working with women is Hell) >>Anon, why don't you ever talk s--- about your ex? Didn't she break up with you because you were bald ha ha? >Ha ha, good one. Didn't you have a miscarriage because you're so fat?

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anon questions life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)14:08:39 No.66454598 >am not happy where I am in life >but every option available to me at the moment in life requires barely rewarding excruciating mental suffering f--- 9 KB PNG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)14:10:07 No.66454622 i know that feel >want domme gf >not into p------
: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)14:08:39 No.66454598 >am not happy where I am in life >but every option available to me at the moment in life requires barely rewarding excruciating mental suffering f--- 9 KB PNG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)14:10:07 No.66454622 i know that feel >want domme gf >not into p------

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Catoregime | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)03:50:56 No.64633456 >go to lift in my home gym >my kitty always sits in front of my bench and watches while I lift 290 KB PNG 27 Replies / 9 Images View Thread : Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)09:01:48 No.64635508 : Anonymous 12/06/21 (Mon)09:04:20 No.64635527 Oh we're posting kitties? This is my big boy. His name is Tony 2.89 MB JPG
: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)03:50:56 No.64633456 >go to lift in my home gym >my kitty always sits in front of my bench and watches while I lift 290 KB PNG 27 Replies / 9 Images View Thread : Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)09:01:48 No.64635508 : Anonymous 12/06/21 (Mon)09:04:20 No.64635527 Oh we're posting kitties? This is my big boy. His name is Tony 2.89 MB JPG

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Anon plays Skyrim | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)14:56:41 No.580557937 >be me >become bored >spend entire weekend downloading Skyrim and installing mods in the proper order 484 KB JPG >start playing >spend 10 more hours troubleshooting issues >can actually play now >playing the game just going through the motions, not really having fun >stop playing after meeting the Jarl in Whiterun >repeat next year
: Anonymous 12/06/21(Mon)14:56:41 No.580557937 >be me >become bored >spend entire weekend downloading Skyrim and installing mods in the proper order 484 KB JPG >start playing >spend 10 more hours troubleshooting issues >can actually play now >playing the game just going through the motions, not really having fun >stop playing after meeting the Jarl in Whiterun >repeat next year

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