Greentext Stories - Images
Hiding in plain sight | /r/Greentext
![Anonymous 10/10/24(Thu)17:30:11 No.204365723 gus.png 1.83 MB PNG >is often seen visiting an old cartel head in a nursing home >always surrounded by shady people >does cartel work out in the open despite being a well known public figure how didn't he get caught earlier?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/930/235/08b.jpeg)
![Anonymous 10/10/24(Thu)17:30:11 No.204365723 gus.png 1.83 MB PNG >is often seen visiting an old cartel head in a nursing home >always surrounded by shady people >does cartel work out in the open despite being a well known public figure how didn't he get caught earlier?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/930/235/08b.jpeg)
Greentext Stories
Anon doesn't believe in witchcraft | /r/Greentext
![⠀ Anonymous 03/08/22(Tue)10:34:23 No.874017743 >rub magic paper on your ass >s--- just goes away Yeah f------ right. 49 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/930/203/16f.jpeg)
![⠀ Anonymous 03/08/22(Tue)10:34:23 No.874017743 >rub magic paper on your ass >s--- just goes away Yeah f------ right. 49 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/930/203/16f.jpeg)
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Vicious Salvo | /r/Greentext
![Anonymous SHE POESN'T KNOW THAT'S MY LAST $20... 81 KB JPG 07/11/24(Thu)23:40:40 No.31600215 >pregnant >never been hornier in my life >husband is scared sex would hurt me or the baby, refuses to do it >love horror movies >husband worries I won't be able to handle them and urges me to skip horror movies until the baby is born Why doesn't he have to give anything up when he's the one that did this s--- to me? I put all my s--- on hold, agreed to the shotgun wedding, all because he said he'd be responsible for getting me pregnant but it feels like I'm the one facing all the hardship Anonymous >>31600215 (OP) # 07/12/24(Fri)01:00:54 No.31600658 Have you tried telling him you want to have sex still? Sometimes men can lose physical attraction to a woman when they get pregnant, but I imagine he still loves you. If you can't be honest to someone you love, then you have no buisness having kids. >>31600686 # >>31628171 # Anonymous >>31600215 (OP) # 07/12/24(Fri)01:02:01 No.31600666 So your husband isn't giving up sex? Have you tried asking his side chick/boyfriend to give you some relief? >>31600686 #](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/930/026/51f.png)
![Anonymous SHE POESN'T KNOW THAT'S MY LAST $20... 81 KB JPG 07/11/24(Thu)23:40:40 No.31600215 >pregnant >never been hornier in my life >husband is scared sex would hurt me or the baby, refuses to do it >love horror movies >husband worries I won't be able to handle them and urges me to skip horror movies until the baby is born Why doesn't he have to give anything up when he's the one that did this s--- to me? I put all my s--- on hold, agreed to the shotgun wedding, all because he said he'd be responsible for getting me pregnant but it feels like I'm the one facing all the hardship Anonymous >>31600215 (OP) # 07/12/24(Fri)01:00:54 No.31600658 Have you tried telling him you want to have sex still? Sometimes men can lose physical attraction to a woman when they get pregnant, but I imagine he still loves you. If you can't be honest to someone you love, then you have no buisness having kids. >>31600686 # >>31628171 # Anonymous >>31600215 (OP) # 07/12/24(Fri)01:02:01 No.31600666 So your husband isn't giving up sex? Have you tried asking his side chick/boyfriend to give you some relief? >>31600686 #](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/930/026/51f.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon protests imperialism | /r/Greentext
![Anonymous (ID: UN+eMOFn 10/21/24(Mon)00:06:49 No.485455738 >Noooo don't send my kids to Indian School! >You'll teach them how to make sawmills? But our ancestors live in those trees! >and we love freezing our asses off in houses made of hides! >We don't wanna build mills to grind grain, back breaking labor is our way! >We don't need a surplus of crops! starving whenever a harvest fails is our way! >Noooo stahp teaching my children technology! You're erasing our culture!!!](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/980/de8.jpeg)
![Anonymous (ID: UN+eMOFn 10/21/24(Mon)00:06:49 No.485455738 >Noooo don't send my kids to Indian School! >You'll teach them how to make sawmills? But our ancestors live in those trees! >and we love freezing our asses off in houses made of hides! >We don't wanna build mills to grind grain, back breaking labor is our way! >We don't need a surplus of crops! starving whenever a harvest fails is our way! >Noooo stahp teaching my children technology! You're erasing our culture!!!](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/980/de8.jpeg)
Greentext Stories
Weaponized autism | /r/Greentext
![File: 1474885625692.jpg (39 KB, 509x619) ☐ times where you have almost made it Anonymous 03/09/17(Thu)11:23:00 No.40643882 [Reply] >>40644281 >>40644891 >>40643911 >>40643931 >>40643932 >>40643942 >>40643946 >>40644094 >>40644105 >>40644114 >>40644126 >>40644145 I am considering to renovate my apartment just to distract me from being myself /fit/ >visiting female friend I have known for many years >do friend stuff, nothing fancy >plan was that I stay the night if it gets too late >oh boy I have prepared myself so long for this >clean shaven, got my best cologne out and even bought a nice new tracksuit to hang around at her place (we are long past gone the point where we pretend to not be hobo-tier while being at home ) >at night >we go to sleep and browse s--- on our phones >could clearly see her miring when I got out of the shower before bed >I have lifted so long for this very moment >decide to be bold it's now or never >"hey wanna have sex?" >ALPHA AS F--- this is my new me >she puts phone down and smirks "uhm haha what? I mean yea sure why not" >stare at her for 5 seconds >bros you can't imagine how long 5 seconds can be >autism spike >look at her and say "yea well I didn't expect that answer" >silence >she looks at me for a few seconds clearly expecting me to make a move >she eventually rolls over with her back to me and gets back on her phone >don't talk or even mention it next morning Hold me, /fit/. Please hold me and tell me everything is going to be alright](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/964/061.png)
![File: 1474885625692.jpg (39 KB, 509x619) ☐ times where you have almost made it Anonymous 03/09/17(Thu)11:23:00 No.40643882 [Reply] >>40644281 >>40644891 >>40643911 >>40643931 >>40643932 >>40643942 >>40643946 >>40644094 >>40644105 >>40644114 >>40644126 >>40644145 I am considering to renovate my apartment just to distract me from being myself /fit/ >visiting female friend I have known for many years >do friend stuff, nothing fancy >plan was that I stay the night if it gets too late >oh boy I have prepared myself so long for this >clean shaven, got my best cologne out and even bought a nice new tracksuit to hang around at her place (we are long past gone the point where we pretend to not be hobo-tier while being at home ) >at night >we go to sleep and browse s--- on our phones >could clearly see her miring when I got out of the shower before bed >I have lifted so long for this very moment >decide to be bold it's now or never >"hey wanna have sex?" >ALPHA AS F--- this is my new me >she puts phone down and smirks "uhm haha what? I mean yea sure why not" >stare at her for 5 seconds >bros you can't imagine how long 5 seconds can be >autism spike >look at her and say "yea well I didn't expect that answer" >silence >she looks at me for a few seconds clearly expecting me to make a move >she eventually rolls over with her back to me and gets back on her phone >don't talk or even mention it next morning Hold me, /fit/. Please hold me and tell me everything is going to be alright](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/964/061.png)
Greentext Stories
Small price to pay for some beef | /r/Greentext
![Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 10/20/24(Sun)15:43:06 No.79190683 Rimi SAVITARNOS KASOS 523 KB PNG Companies use self service checkouts to save money. Ok then. >Go to supermarket >Need beef >Medium roasting joint (0.8kg) >Loaf of bread (800g) See where I'm going with this? >Be at self service checkout >Scan the bread >Place the beef in the bag >Leave the bread behind](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/792/523.png)
![Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 10/20/24(Sun)15:43:06 No.79190683 Rimi SAVITARNOS KASOS 523 KB PNG Companies use self service checkouts to save money. Ok then. >Go to supermarket >Need beef >Medium roasting joint (0.8kg) >Loaf of bread (800g) See where I'm going with this? >Be at self service checkout >Scan the bread >Place the beef in the bag >Leave the bread behind](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/792/523.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon makes paratroopers | /r/Greentext
![File: N-008.png (283 KB, 523x567) HAN RED WHITE &BIL PARACH Anonymous 03/24/17(Fri)11:29:31 No.726714895 [Reply] > be me > be in 2003 > firework night > britfag celebration of the torture of a catholic > Uncle reveals he's attached mice/guinea pigs to the rockets along with makeshift parachutes > fireworks start going off > no mice survive > wholesome family tradition begins > be one year later > more mice > family compete to see who can make the best parachutes > no mice survive > be in 2008 > first successful landing > first firework day trophy is awarded to my sister > still no survivors though > baby steps > be in 2010 > first survivor touches down > big celebration > we begin breeding the mice to save money > survivor is used as stud to selectively breed an ubermaus race of rocket riders > be in 2011 > we are getting good at this > survival rate has reached ~5 per year > survivors are sent back up > clearly they are the best specimens > need to stay competetive to win the trophy and newly introduced monetary prize > be in 2015 > great year for rocket riders > 11 survive >mfw I still haven't won a trophy > pic related](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/749/175.png)
![File: N-008.png (283 KB, 523x567) HAN RED WHITE &BIL PARACH Anonymous 03/24/17(Fri)11:29:31 No.726714895 [Reply] > be me > be in 2003 > firework night > britfag celebration of the torture of a catholic > Uncle reveals he's attached mice/guinea pigs to the rockets along with makeshift parachutes > fireworks start going off > no mice survive > wholesome family tradition begins > be one year later > more mice > family compete to see who can make the best parachutes > no mice survive > be in 2008 > first successful landing > first firework day trophy is awarded to my sister > still no survivors though > baby steps > be in 2010 > first survivor touches down > big celebration > we begin breeding the mice to save money > survivor is used as stud to selectively breed an ubermaus race of rocket riders > be in 2011 > we are getting good at this > survival rate has reached ~5 per year > survivors are sent back up > clearly they are the best specimens > need to stay competetive to win the trophy and newly introduced monetary prize > be in 2015 > great year for rocket riders > 11 survive >mfw I still haven't won a trophy > pic related](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/749/175.png)
Greentext Stories
Power outages | /r/Greentext
![Anonymous 07/19/22(Tue)10:01:03 No.694622 >alert on phone saying a power outage is coming soon >the chicken nuggets still have 15 minutes in the oven 375 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/748/c46.png)
![Anonymous 07/19/22(Tue)10:01:03 No.694622 >alert on phone saying a power outage is coming soon >the chicken nuggets still have 15 minutes in the oven 375 KB JPG](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/748/c46.png)
Greentext Stories
I think he meant a small handful of exes not more than 2 buses worth of hookups. | /r/Greentext
![Anonymous 158 KB JPG 02/10/23(Fri)16:24:30 No.29554341 >hitting things off well with a cute cis guy >kinda falling in love with him >I say during a conversation that guys who want virgins are delusional, dumb, and overly judgmental >he says "Yeah, I totally agree, nothing wrong with having a past or some experience" >I tell him "Thanks. I've slept with maybe... 60 or 70 people? It's not that big of a deal. All that matters is the present." >he looks uncomfortable and says "uh... yeah" >distances himself from me afterwards What.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/690/465.jpeg)
![Anonymous 158 KB JPG 02/10/23(Fri)16:24:30 No.29554341 >hitting things off well with a cute cis guy >kinda falling in love with him >I say during a conversation that guys who want virgins are delusional, dumb, and overly judgmental >he says "Yeah, I totally agree, nothing wrong with having a past or some experience" >I tell him "Thanks. I've slept with maybe... 60 or 70 people? It's not that big of a deal. All that matters is the present." >he looks uncomfortable and says "uh... yeah" >distances himself from me afterwards What.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/690/465.jpeg)
Greentext Stories
didn't expect it to be holesome | /r/Greentext
![/toy/ Anonymous my Christmas experience 6 KB JPG 01/05/21(Tue)21:33:59 No.8677314 >be me >an 18 year old autistic kid who likes stuff animals > tell my older brother about these round seal plush toys from japan that are really cute >brother probably not paying too much attention I assumed so I forgot I told him > fast forward to December 25th >brother hands me a flat package >I think it's a shirt or something > I open it up I find a very flattened small version of the seal pillow I told him about > I am very happy and tell him how much I love it > thanks brother](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/643/162.png)
![/toy/ Anonymous my Christmas experience 6 KB JPG 01/05/21(Tue)21:33:59 No.8677314 >be me >an 18 year old autistic kid who likes stuff animals > tell my older brother about these round seal plush toys from japan that are really cute >brother probably not paying too much attention I assumed so I forgot I told him > fast forward to December 25th >brother hands me a flat package >I think it's a shirt or something > I open it up I find a very flattened small version of the seal pillow I told him about > I am very happy and tell him how much I love it > thanks brother](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/643/162.png)
Greentext Stories
What did she mean by this? | /r/Greentext
![Anonymous 10/08/24(Tue)21:13:46 No.204304690 harryp.png 752 KB PNG >all good looking girls are taken >the only ones left are undesirable scraps >make them indian uhhhhh rowling?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/543/bd7.jpeg)
![Anonymous 10/08/24(Tue)21:13:46 No.204304690 harryp.png 752 KB PNG >all good looking girls are taken >the only ones left are undesirable scraps >make them indian uhhhhh rowling?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/543/bd7.jpeg)
Greentext Stories
US Military Research | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 07/18/24(Thu)05:17:11 No.38392817 06-10-06smile.jpg 45 KB JPG >humans have existed for 100,000 years >archeologists have discovered human skulls with perfectly preserved and intact teeth, not even a single cavity. >fast forward to modern times >suddenly humans have to brush our teeth twice a day every single day or our teeth will rot and fall out. Also, just for fun, look up caries vaccine and why we don't have one. Anonymous >>38392817 (OP) # 07/18/24(Thu)05:20:20 No.38392833 That's because of all the sugar everywhere in our diet. People from Pompeii, for instance, had perfectly good teeth even when they were like 40-- LOL.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/414/bee.png)
![: Anonymous 07/18/24(Thu)05:17:11 No.38392817 06-10-06smile.jpg 45 KB JPG >humans have existed for 100,000 years >archeologists have discovered human skulls with perfectly preserved and intact teeth, not even a single cavity. >fast forward to modern times >suddenly humans have to brush our teeth twice a day every single day or our teeth will rot and fall out. Also, just for fun, look up caries vaccine and why we don't have one. Anonymous >>38392817 (OP) # 07/18/24(Thu)05:20:20 No.38392833 That's because of all the sugar everywhere in our diet. People from Pompeii, for instance, had perfectly good teeth even when they were like 40-- LOL.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/414/bee.png)
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Weeb talk and banter | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 10/19/24(Sat)00:01:54 No.87728786 Pipkin Pinna Low exort Clips maxresdefault.jpg 68 KB JPG >pink >obvious grifter >retarded >stirs up drama >makes the worst music imaginable >be mori calliope >pic unrelated](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/392/f97.jpeg)
![: Anonymous 10/19/24(Sat)00:01:54 No.87728786 Pipkin Pinna Low exort Clips maxresdefault.jpg 68 KB JPG >pink >obvious grifter >retarded >stirs up drama >makes the worst music imaginable >be mori calliope >pic unrelated](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/392/f97.jpeg)
Greentext Stories
Survival of the retardest | /r/Greentext
![Anonymous (ID: XS0ICUaz) [⭑ CLOVER LEAF THON PALE EN MORCEAUX LISTAO dans L'EAU& www CLOVER LEAF 10/07/24(Mon) 15:48:04 No.484065410 CHUNK LIGHT TUNA SKIPIACK in WATER CLOVER THON PALE EN MORCEAUX CLOVER THON PALEEN MORCEAUX BRUS SARD SPRING WALER EAU DE SOURC SARDINES CARDINES BR NICK BARE NES NICK SARDINES SPRING WA EAU DE SO SPRING WATER EAU DE SOURCE SPRING WATER EAU DE SORCE SPRING WATE EAU DE SOup FEMALE EJACUL UNLEASH THE ULTIMATE FINE SILVER ARGENT PUR 900790168 Expandable el EMA EDERAL GAME 1294CB B SOMRAJ POKRA DR. JEFFRE TALL 036B808D-2216-4273-AF7E-B69DE37FADBC.jpg 761 KB JPG >buy decent food processor >buy vacuum sealer >buy large dehydrator >100lbs of rice >cook rice then dehydrate it >100lbs of black bean >cook beans then dehydrate >100lbs of lean ground beef >cook beef then dehydrate and grind into fine powder with food processor Vacuum seal everything separately in appropriate portion sizes for you and make sure to use oxygen absorbers. You have just created 230 days of survival food for one person that only requires water to rehydrate and eat. Season as you see fit. You're welcome.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/344/e35.jpeg)
![Anonymous (ID: XS0ICUaz) [⭑ CLOVER LEAF THON PALE EN MORCEAUX LISTAO dans L'EAU& www CLOVER LEAF 10/07/24(Mon) 15:48:04 No.484065410 CHUNK LIGHT TUNA SKIPIACK in WATER CLOVER THON PALE EN MORCEAUX CLOVER THON PALEEN MORCEAUX BRUS SARD SPRING WALER EAU DE SOURC SARDINES CARDINES BR NICK BARE NES NICK SARDINES SPRING WA EAU DE SO SPRING WATER EAU DE SOURCE SPRING WATER EAU DE SORCE SPRING WATE EAU DE SOup FEMALE EJACUL UNLEASH THE ULTIMATE FINE SILVER ARGENT PUR 900790168 Expandable el EMA EDERAL GAME 1294CB B SOMRAJ POKRA DR. JEFFRE TALL 036B808D-2216-4273-AF7E-B69DE37FADBC.jpg 761 KB JPG >buy decent food processor >buy vacuum sealer >buy large dehydrator >100lbs of rice >cook rice then dehydrate it >100lbs of black bean >cook beans then dehydrate >100lbs of lean ground beef >cook beef then dehydrate and grind into fine powder with food processor Vacuum seal everything separately in appropriate portion sizes for you and make sure to use oxygen absorbers. You have just created 230 days of survival food for one person that only requires water to rehydrate and eat. Season as you see fit. You're welcome.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/344/e35.jpeg)
Greentext Stories
Imagine actually watching Bleach | /r/Greentext
![Anonymous The school parts of Bleach are(...) 33 KB JPG 04/02/22(Sat)20:28:53 No.236144851 >watch Bleach >skip past all of the action / story stuff >exclusively watch the slice-of-life school parts with Ichigo and his friends >don't bother with any of the supernatural ghost hunting business](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/327/4aa.jpeg)
![Anonymous The school parts of Bleach are(...) 33 KB JPG 04/02/22(Sat)20:28:53 No.236144851 >watch Bleach >skip past all of the action / story stuff >exclusively watch the slice-of-life school parts with Ichigo and his friends >don't bother with any of the supernatural ghost hunting business](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/327/4aa.jpeg)
Greentext Stories
A 4chinner's pipe dream | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 10/07/24(Mon)05:10:06 No.691106620 >play romance game 1728263026609854.jpg 221 KB JPG >realized you will never experience that because you don't even like people enough to form meaningful relationships Why does it only makes me emptier?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/929/234/df0.jpeg)
![: Anonymous 10/07/24(Mon)05:10:06 No.691106620 >play romance game 1728263026609854.jpg 221 KB JPG >realized you will never experience that because you don't even like people enough to form meaningful relationships Why does it only makes me emptier?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/929/234/df0.jpeg)
Greentext Stories