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Femanon joins a discord server | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/01/22(Sun)00:59:06 No.68438905 >Join discord server from a link on b >claims to be about fighting against the degradation of traditional values >mostly just zoomers combining about women 37 KB JPG >make a post pretending to be a girl >say that I hate feminism and want a dominant husband to be subservient to >get flooded with replies and dms from desperate zoomers trying to hook up >say I want to marry a fit man who abstains from drugs and p--- >everyone flips out, get called a feminazi and sent death threats by the same zoomers Are they all like this?
Anonymous 05/01/22(Sun)00:59:06 No.68438905 >Join discord server from a link on b >claims to be about fighting against the degradation of traditional values >mostly just zoomers combining about women 37 KB JPG >make a post pretending to be a girl >say that I hate feminism and want a dominant husband to be subservient to >get flooded with replies and dms from desperate zoomers trying to hook up >say I want to marry a fit man who abstains from drugs and p--- >everyone flips out, get called a feminazi and sent death threats by the same zoomers Are they all like this?

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Perfect way to go | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: CfNHW8YS ) 06/24/14(Tue)00:32:23 No.552734235 >rent a convertible sports car and a parachute >get your favorite handgun and shoot it in the air around a police station >high speed chase ensues >lead the police into the desert and wait for media choppers >itstime.jpg >tie parachute cord around your neck and throw a brick on the gas >deploy parachute, snapping your neck and simultaniously dragging your lifeless body into the air behind the car >parasail across the desert until your car dies Bonus points if the parachute says Ron Paul 2008 Bonus points if wearing assless fursuit
Anonymous (ID: CfNHW8YS ) 06/24/14(Tue)00:32:23 No.552734235 >rent a convertible sports car and a parachute >get your favorite handgun and shoot it in the air around a police station >high speed chase ensues >lead the police into the desert and wait for media choppers >itstime.jpg >tie parachute cord around your neck and throw a brick on the gas >deploy parachute, snapping your neck and simultaniously dragging your lifeless body into the air behind the car >parasail across the desert until your car dies Bonus points if the parachute says Ron Paul 2008 Bonus points if wearing assless fursuit

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Anon can't go swimming | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/31/17(Thu)21:44:54 No.743795350 T >About 600 gators are now in the flood water in Houston >Apparently HIV-positive blood has leaked into said water (from hospitals being 51 KB JPG flooded n s---) >AFAIK they're warning people not to go in the water because of the GatorAIDS POOL'S CLOSED
Anonymous 08/31/17(Thu)21:44:54 No.743795350 T >About 600 gators are now in the flood water in Houston >Apparently HIV-positive blood has leaked into said water (from hospitals being 51 KB JPG flooded n s---) >AFAIK they're warning people not to go in the water because of the GatorAIDS POOL'S CLOSED

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Some men just want to watch the world burn | /r/Greentext

07/29/21(Thu)13:47:06 No.15424063 : Anonymous Movie idea >aliens come to earth >tell humanity that it must choose one of its races to be eliminated before they share their knowledge and tech 20 KB JPG >a worldwide anonymous poll is held where you just have to think of which race to get rid of (none is an option as well) >plot twist: as the poll ends everyone who voted for a certain race gets a corresponding symbol tattooed on their face >aliens instantly leave without purging anyone or saying a word >chaos ensues
07/29/21(Thu)13:47:06 No.15424063 : Anonymous Movie idea >aliens come to earth >tell humanity that it must choose one of its races to be eliminated before they share their knowledge and tech 20 KB JPG >a worldwide anonymous poll is held where you just have to think of which race to get rid of (none is an option as well) >plot twist: as the poll ends everyone who voted for a certain race gets a corresponding symbol tattooed on their face >aliens instantly leave without purging anyone or saying a word >chaos ensues

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Anon is a camping expert | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/05/21(Mon)11:44:34 No.64448617 Have you taken the NPCpill yet, /r9k/ >Be me, social retard >Work is always difficult because I literally can't make friends >Never have any idea what to talk about 89 KB JPG >Like the idea of camping >Decide I'm going to be the Camp Bro NPC >No matter what, no matter how minor the question or subject is at work, always tie in camping or at minimum a camping pun >Any time I'm away from my desk I put a "Gone Fishing" sign up >Start to wear plaid and camo, drink my coffee out of a thermos >People are annoyed at first, but ignore it >Eventually people start to talk to me about camping, asking for places, ideas, how to do stuff >Start to make friends, coworkers want to do a BBQ by the river and invite me and have me help plan it >it goes great and I b------- my way through everything >"Whoa, you're a pretty cool guy, anon!" >mfw I've never been camping and just browse /out/ too much 6 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 07/05/21(Mon)11:44:34 No.64448617 Have you taken the NPCpill yet, /r9k/ >Be me, social retard >Work is always difficult because I literally can't make friends >Never have any idea what to talk about 89 KB JPG >Like the idea of camping >Decide I'm going to be the Camp Bro NPC >No matter what, no matter how minor the question or subject is at work, always tie in camping or at minimum a camping pun >Any time I'm away from my desk I put a "Gone Fishing" sign up >Start to wear plaid and camo, drink my coffee out of a thermos >People are annoyed at first, but ignore it >Eventually people start to talk to me about camping, asking for places, ideas, how to do stuff >Start to make friends, coworkers want to do a BBQ by the river and invite me and have me help plan it >it goes great and I b------- my way through everything >"Whoa, you're a pretty cool guy, anon!" >mfw I've never been camping and just browse /out/ too much 6 Replies View Thread

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dumblebased | /r/Greentext

1559591480647.png, 396KIB, 1305x667 Anonymous Tue 09 Jul 2019 17:51:38 No.117817885 Quoted By: >>117818074>>117818090 >>117818102 >>117818697 >>117820732 >>117822685>>117822875 >>117822997 >>117823695 >>117823706 >>117823780 >ONE POINT TO SLYTHERIN FOR EACH JEW KILLED IN THE HOLOCAUST >Draco and the kids start cheering >Gandalf looks at the screen >ZERO POINTS!
1559591480647.png, 396KIB, 1305x667 Anonymous Tue 09 Jul 2019 17:51:38 No.117817885 Quoted By: >>117818074>>117818090 >>117818102 >>117818697 >>117820732 >>117822685>>117822875 >>117822997 >>117823695 >>117823706 >>117823780 >ONE POINT TO SLYTHERIN FOR EACH JEW KILLED IN THE HOLOCAUST >Draco and the kids start cheering >Gandalf looks at the screen >ZERO POINTS!

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Psstt.... Have you heard this? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/26/22(Tue) 14:51:05 No.167141834 LOO000000OL.jpg 56 KB JPG Moscow theater showing pirated version (from torrents) of batman LOL Anonymous 04/26/22(Tue)16:46:24 No.167148013 >>167141834 (OP) # >projector fires up >some Russian Google chrome browser homepage >types in 123movies into search bar >clicks first link >doesn't work >clicks second link >clicks on search bar >ad pops up >exit ad >click search bar >ad pops up >exit ad, click searchbar >type in Batman >click The Batman (2022) >ad pops up >exit ad >hit play >hit full-screen >ad pops up >exit ad, hit full screen >Russian audience starts cheering Sounds based to me
: Anonymous 04/26/22(Tue) 14:51:05 No.167141834 LOO000000OL.jpg 56 KB JPG Moscow theater showing pirated version (from torrents) of batman LOL Anonymous 04/26/22(Tue)16:46:24 No.167148013 >>167141834 (OP) # >projector fires up >some Russian Google chrome browser homepage >types in 123movies into search bar >clicks first link >doesn't work >clicks second link >clicks on search bar >ad pops up >exit ad >click search bar >ad pops up >exit ad, click searchbar >type in Batman >click The Batman (2022) >ad pops up >exit ad >hit play >hit full-screen >ad pops up >exit ad, hit full screen >Russian audience starts cheering Sounds based to me

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Fake it till you makeup | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/30/22(Sat)12:06:17 No.68435164 >be ugly male >terrible skin with scars from cystic acne >start wearing light make-up >women start checking me out >sister calls me handsome 77 KB JPG >mom keeps saying how clear my skin looks now >my reflection in the mirror actually looks good >self confidence is through the roof why haven't you taken the make-up pill? it's a litteral cheat code, I can't ever go back.
: Anonymous 04/30/22(Sat)12:06:17 No.68435164 >be ugly male >terrible skin with scars from cystic acne >start wearing light make-up >women start checking me out >sister calls me handsome 77 KB JPG >mom keeps saying how clear my skin looks now >my reflection in the mirror actually looks good >self confidence is through the roof why haven't you taken the make-up pill? it's a litteral cheat code, I can't ever go back.

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Anon has an unpopular opinion | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 15 KB JPG 05/10/21 (Mon)12:17:38 No.854094226 >go on reddit >unpopular opinion subreddit >give unpopular opinion >downvoted how do these retards function
: Anonymous 15 KB JPG 05/10/21 (Mon)12:17:38 No.854094226 >go on reddit >unpopular opinion subreddit >give unpopular opinion >downvoted how do these retards function

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Anon's Journey | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/30/22(Sat)21:34:35 No.877233761 >be me >been fat for most of my life >parents have always loved me >encouraged me to play sports >this stopped me from getting any fatter since I ate the equivalent of a horse a day 39 KB JPG >get really depressed when 14 >didn't help that I was already pretty introverted >quit all sports & extracurricular activities >become fatter >lose all motivation to do anything >grades drop dramatically >start going to school less and less >parents get really concerned after I start skipping entire days >I get called into the principal's office multiple times regarding my attendance with my moth >mother cries every time >16 >covid hits >online school >don't do any of the work and don't attend any classes >back to school after a few months >still skip most days or arrive really late >school finally threatens to expel me >parents decide to take me to a psychiatrist to see why I'm so retarded >psychiatrist was hot 40 ish brown lady and was very kind >after a few sessions she puts me on meds >take meds for rest of the year >help a little but was underwhelming >mother sends me to different school because she feels that it would be a better environment >struggle to make friends for the first 4 months >start hitting the gym although inconsistently >start eating less and healthier >start picking up activities again >overall mood is better >start get closer and hanging out more with friends >feel motivated to do better in school >improve my grades enough to get into uni even though I haven't paid attention in classes for the last 3 years >meds have served their purpose and make me feel worse so I stop taking them >lose 12kg body weight and built up a little bit of muscle by the end of the year >still pretty fat and have more gains to achieve >no longer depressed and become more social but still pretty introverted >18 now, still a long way to go but proud of my progress so far I know there are people in much worse situations than me but I hope this motivated you a little Anon :)
: Anonymous 04/30/22(Sat)21:34:35 No.877233761 >be me >been fat for most of my life >parents have always loved me >encouraged me to play sports >this stopped me from getting any fatter since I ate the equivalent of a horse a day 39 KB JPG >get really depressed when 14 >didn't help that I was already pretty introverted >quit all sports & extracurricular activities >become fatter >lose all motivation to do anything >grades drop dramatically >start going to school less and less >parents get really concerned after I start skipping entire days >I get called into the principal's office multiple times regarding my attendance with my moth >mother cries every time >16 >covid hits >online school >don't do any of the work and don't attend any classes >back to school after a few months >still skip most days or arrive really late >school finally threatens to expel me >parents decide to take me to a psychiatrist to see why I'm so retarded >psychiatrist was hot 40 ish brown lady and was very kind >after a few sessions she puts me on meds >take meds for rest of the year >help a little but was underwhelming >mother sends me to different school because she feels that it would be a better environment >struggle to make friends for the first 4 months >start hitting the gym although inconsistently >start eating less and healthier >start picking up activities again >overall mood is better >start get closer and hanging out more with friends >feel motivated to do better in school >improve my grades enough to get into uni even though I haven't paid attention in classes for the last 3 years >meds have served their purpose and make me feel worse so I stop taking them >lose 12kg body weight and built up a little bit of muscle by the end of the year >still pretty fat and have more gains to achieve >no longer depressed and become more social but still pretty introverted >18 now, still a long way to go but proud of my progress so far I know there are people in much worse situations than me but I hope this motivated you a little Anon :)

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Anon's Favourite Movie Lines | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Favorite movie lines 10/04/20(Sun)15:07:39 No.140245384 161AA42A-EDA1-4F0D-832B-B18023B797D1.jpg 50 KB JPG >Patrick, it's you!! You're the American Psycho?!!" Anonymous >>140245384 (OP) # He didn't say that. 10/04/20(Sun)15:08:00 No.140245402
Anonymous Favorite movie lines 10/04/20(Sun)15:07:39 No.140245384 161AA42A-EDA1-4F0D-832B-B18023B797D1.jpg 50 KB JPG >Patrick, it's you!! You're the American Psycho?!!" Anonymous >>140245384 (OP) # He didn't say that. 10/04/20(Sun)15:08:00 No.140245402

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Anon is born dumb | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/13/20(Sun)21:14:04 No.842264200 >be me >retard >never done drugs once in my life >friends and family all think I smoke weed every day >boss also thinks I show 27 KB PNG up high to work >nobody believes me when I tell them I'm just f------ stupid >mfw View Thread
: Anonymous 12/13/20(Sun)21:14:04 No.842264200 >be me >retard >never done drugs once in my life >friends and family all think I smoke weed every day >boss also thinks I show 27 KB PNG up high to work >nobody believes me when I tell them I'm just f------ stupid >mfw View Thread

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Anon laughs to hold back the tears | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: GCNakmXd ) 08/22/21(Sun)21:15:04 No.335610568 >>335609141 # >Taliban is now running around with M4s decked in western-style operator gear, driving around in MRAPS and IFVs and operating their own air force 8 KB JPG >Anti-Taliban forces are now rag-wearnig mountain guerillas with rusty Aks this whole thing is just f------ ridiculous
: Anonymous (ID: GCNakmXd ) 08/22/21(Sun)21:15:04 No.335610568 >>335609141 # >Taliban is now running around with M4s decked in western-style operator gear, driving around in MRAPS and IFVs and operating their own air force 8 KB JPG >Anti-Taliban forces are now rag-wearnig mountain guerillas with rusty Aks this whole thing is just f------ ridiculous

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Anon makes a friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/05/19(Sat)11:22:53 >Make female friend in class >Little older than me, but still smaller than me and hot as hell 648 KB PNG >Starts inviting me out for coffee after class, just me and her >Text each other constantly >Goes on for about a month >Totally convinced she likes me, thinking about making a move >One day start talking about cats, say I'd never want one >"But anon, what if your future husband wants one?" >Silence, we just stare at each other >"...you're gay, right anon?" What the f--- I f------ hate women No.50255501
: Anonymous 01/05/19(Sat)11:22:53 >Make female friend in class >Little older than me, but still smaller than me and hot as hell 648 KB PNG >Starts inviting me out for coffee after class, just me and her >Text each other constantly >Goes on for about a month >Totally convinced she likes me, thinking about making a move >One day start talking about cats, say I'd never want one >"But anon, what if your future husband wants one?" >Silence, we just stare at each other >"...you're gay, right anon?" What the f--- I f------ hate women No.50255501

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Anon hates children now | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/30/22(Sat) 08:11:57 No.877240939 >working at McDonald's >kid with his mom brings in orange and green toy gun >joke around with him "Oh are you a soilder?" >kid looks up at me >points toy at me 17 KB JPG "I'll kill you ugly man" >kids are absolute f------ assholes >salt the s--- of his fries and hamburger >enjoy that you little prick
: Anonymous 04/30/22(Sat) 08:11:57 No.877240939 >working at McDonald's >kid with his mom brings in orange and green toy gun >joke around with him "Oh are you a soilder?" >kid looks up at me >points toy at me 17 KB JPG "I'll kill you ugly man" >kids are absolute f------ assholes >salt the s--- of his fries and hamburger >enjoy that you little prick

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Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Tf was this bitches problem? >be me a few weeks ago >in auditorium at school because of pep rally b------- and they let us go into the auditorium if we didn't wanna go to it 47 KB PNG >see girl >notice it's my crushes friend >go up to her trying to ask a question >some girl stands in front of me >"turn your ass around now. Go." >confused >"go back to your friends now. Go" >I say "I'm just trying to ask a question to a friend-" >she cuts me off and goes "now" >go back to my friends out of confusion Tf was her problem? 04/29/22 (Fri)13:25:56 No.877183399
Anonymous Tf was this bitches problem? >be me a few weeks ago >in auditorium at school because of pep rally b------- and they let us go into the auditorium if we didn't wanna go to it 47 KB PNG >see girl >notice it's my crushes friend >go up to her trying to ask a question >some girl stands in front of me >"turn your ass around now. Go." >confused >"go back to your friends now. Go" >I say "I'm just trying to ask a question to a friend-" >she cuts me off and goes "now" >go back to my friends out of confusion Tf was her problem? 04/29/22 (Fri)13:25:56 No.877183399

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