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Anon is used | /r/Greentext

>be me >horny >go on omegle cause retarded >turn on camera >almost everyone thinks im a girl >one dude nuts >mfw 179 KB PNG w--
>be me >horny >go on omegle cause retarded >turn on camera >almost everyone thinks im a girl >one dude nuts >mfw 179 KB PNG w--

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Anon Had Big Brain Energy | /r/Greentext


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Anon encounters problems in fallout 4 | /r/Greentext


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Anon got scammed | /r/Greentext

>be me >18 >riding train home from work >11pm, train is practically empty >random chick sits next to me >she's 19, kinda cute >sees her knee shaking >l ask if she's ok >"anon, I cant get home with just the train and my family refuses to pick me up and I have no money for an uber." 58 KB JPG >weird >"why?" >she lies: "idk" >l apologize and say I cant help her because my stop is way before hers' >I get off at my station >she follows >screaminginternally.jpeg >be me not understanding why she f----- herself like that >she asks if she can stay at mine >l'm like f--- no >she starts crying >l agree to buy an uber >"omg anon thank you so much!!!" >"anon, what's your instagram? I'll add you." >she writes my social into her phone notes >Uber arrives >Uber costs me $50 >she never added me on instagram should I have told her to f--- off from the start?
>be me >18 >riding train home from work >11pm, train is practically empty >random chick sits next to me >she's 19, kinda cute >sees her knee shaking >l ask if she's ok >"anon, I cant get home with just the train and my family refuses to pick me up and I have no money for an uber." 58 KB JPG >weird >"why?" >she lies: "idk" >l apologize and say I cant help her because my stop is way before hers' >I get off at my station >she follows >screaminginternally.jpeg >be me not understanding why she f----- herself like that >she asks if she can stay at mine >l'm like f--- no >she starts crying >l agree to buy an uber >"omg anon thank you so much!!!" >"anon, what's your instagram? I'll add you." >she writes my social into her phone notes >Uber arrives >Uber costs me $50 >she never added me on instagram should I have told her to f--- off from the start?

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Anon Forgot His New Bluetooth Speaker | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: rZjfw/by ) 08/15/14(Fri)13:47:15 No.562739680 >be me >it is Christmas >open first present, Bluetooth speakers >play some Christmas music >proceed to open more presents >master has given dobby a sock >have a good time 67 KB JPG >family all there >going up for a shower >get dat boner >rub it out while watching p--- on my phone >come downstairs, family looks horrified >the speakers broadcasted all the p--- >mfw
Anonymous (ID: rZjfw/by ) 08/15/14(Fri)13:47:15 No.562739680 >be me >it is Christmas >open first present, Bluetooth speakers >play some Christmas music >proceed to open more presents >master has given dobby a sock >have a good time 67 KB JPG >family all there >going up for a shower >get dat boner >rub it out while watching p--- on my phone >come downstairs, family looks horrified >the speakers broadcasted all the p--- >mfw

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On the rack | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)07:49:42 No.64857874 5ee.jpg 61 KB JPG >boobs are... LE GOOD!!! >haha yeah I heckin' love boobarinos >wow check out the set on her >nothing gets the juices flowing more than a couple of sacks of fat attached to a girl's chest >the bigger the better, right lads? >boobs are based!!!! : Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)07:50:00 No.64857877 >for me, it's cocks 33 KB JPG
: Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)07:49:42 No.64857874 5ee.jpg 61 KB JPG >boobs are... LE GOOD!!! >haha yeah I heckin' love boobarinos >wow check out the set on her >nothing gets the juices flowing more than a couple of sacks of fat attached to a girl's chest >the bigger the better, right lads? >boobs are based!!!! : Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)07:50:00 No.64857877 >for me, it's cocks 33 KB JPG

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Anon is Schwabpilled | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: MC7Flim3 ) 08/06/21(Fri)07:07:11 No.39489234 >Food? Inflated. >Currency? Devalued. >Job? Shutdown. 167 КВ ЈPG >Gym? Shutdown. >Vaccine? Taken. >Therapy? Virtually attended. >Meds? Taken. >Living situation? Quarantined. >Crypto portfolio? Regulated. >Net worth? Bogged. >Taxes? Paid. >Home? Pod. : Anonymous (ID: 8GT0/axP ) 08/06/21(Fri)07:07:32 No.39489245 >Hotel? Trivago >>39492662 #
: Anonymous (ID: MC7Flim3 ) 08/06/21(Fri)07:07:11 No.39489234 >Food? Inflated. >Currency? Devalued. >Job? Shutdown. 167 КВ ЈPG >Gym? Shutdown. >Vaccine? Taken. >Therapy? Virtually attended. >Meds? Taken. >Living situation? Quarantined. >Crypto portfolio? Regulated. >Net worth? Bogged. >Taxes? Paid. >Home? Pod. : Anonymous (ID: 8GT0/axP ) 08/06/21(Fri)07:07:32 No.39489245 >Hotel? Trivago >>39492662 #

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Fit as a fiddle | /r/Greentext


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Anon's stepsister | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)14:34:21 No.860458638 >here's a picture of my stepsister pic unrelated
O Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)14:34:21 No.860458638 >here's a picture of my stepsister pic unrelated

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All the lonely people, where do they all come from? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)06:59:25 No.64857451 >have an old neighbor >talk to him sometimes AU Duda oments will be lo Thetears in rain >he gives me good life advice >his wife died, kids don't care about him >he has a cat that's really old >it dies >visit him Time to die 137 KB JPG >have a usual talk, he seems a lot more sad than usual >"thanks for coming over, anon" >later found out he died in his sleep a week later
: Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)06:59:25 No.64857451 >have an old neighbor >talk to him sometimes AU Duda oments will be lo Thetears in rain >he gives me good life advice >his wife died, kids don't care about him >he has a cat that's really old >it dies >visit him Time to die 137 KB JPG >have a usual talk, he seems a lot more sad than usual >"thanks for coming over, anon" >later found out he died in his sleep a week later

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Anon Gets Rekt | /r/Greentext

BORN to >buying cigarettes at the usual gas station >girl behind counter "you look so young, why are you ruining your good looks with cigarettes?" >ask her if she really meant i look good FEEL 24 KB JPG >"nah just kidding haha smoke away buddy"
BORN to >buying cigarettes at the usual gas station >girl behind counter "you look so young, why are you ruining your good looks with cigarettes?" >ask her if she really meant i look good FEEL 24 KB JPG >"nah just kidding haha smoke away buddy"

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Anon's friends are hypocrites | /r/Greentext

File: download (2).jpg (5 KB, 265x190) O Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)00:55:17 No.860446570 >be me >be in highschool >be asian >in gym with group of friends >black friend calls me coinslot >i said the first two letters of the nword, then stopped >everyone stops and stares >after a while they awkwardly try to brush it off, >avoid me like a cancerous child >never mention that day again what should i have done b?
File: download (2).jpg (5 KB, 265x190) O Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)00:55:17 No.860446570 >be me >be in highschool >be asian >in gym with group of friends >black friend calls me coinslot >i said the first two letters of the nword, then stopped >everyone stops and stares >after a while they awkwardly try to brush it off, >avoid me like a cancerous child >never mention that day again what should i have done b?

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Can’t make this shit up… or can you | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/05/21(Thu)18:55:23 No.860423707 Sexy stories? >Be me >Havn't had sex in three in months >Go on Tinder >Match with local girl >She's 22, cute, innocent face, black hair, 344 KB JPG septum piercing, science student >she's chubby but whatever I wanna but >Start talking, innocent banter >Layout I'm just tryna get laid, her too >The next day she says she's got a free house, her mom is off with her bf >l go over to hers, open the door to a very shy girl (she's lonely and it's her first time doing this) >She asks if I want a drink >I say nah I'm driving, let's go upstairs >We get to her room, I sit her on the bed and start kissing her >Take off her bra to reveal a huuuge pair of big pillowy f--- off t---, the biggest and best l'll probably ever see >l f--- the s--- out of her, get her to suck my balls for 40 mins and I came in her mouth >Afterwards she told me we went to the same high school, and she had a crush on me, (I had no idea who she was) >f----- her a bunch and got alotta good head and ball sucks off her for the next few months, after that we ended things Pic unrelated
: Anonymous 08/05/21(Thu)18:55:23 No.860423707 Sexy stories? >Be me >Havn't had sex in three in months >Go on Tinder >Match with local girl >She's 22, cute, innocent face, black hair, 344 KB JPG septum piercing, science student >she's chubby but whatever I wanna but >Start talking, innocent banter >Layout I'm just tryna get laid, her too >The next day she says she's got a free house, her mom is off with her bf >l go over to hers, open the door to a very shy girl (she's lonely and it's her first time doing this) >She asks if I want a drink >I say nah I'm driving, let's go upstairs >We get to her room, I sit her on the bed and start kissing her >Take off her bra to reveal a huuuge pair of big pillowy f--- off t---, the biggest and best l'll probably ever see >l f--- the s--- out of her, get her to suck my balls for 40 mins and I came in her mouth >Afterwards she told me we went to the same high school, and she had a crush on me, (I had no idea who she was) >f----- her a bunch and got alotta good head and ball sucks off her for the next few months, after that we ended things Pic unrelated

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Anon Makes A Threat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)01:34:39 No.64855245 I'm going to pee your pants. 80 KB JPG 4 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)01:39:32 No.64855286 >>64855245 (OP) # very interesting anon, please explain further 25 KB JPG
: Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)01:34:39 No.64855245 I'm going to pee your pants. 80 KB JPG 4 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 08/06/21(Fri)01:39:32 No.64855286 >>64855245 (OP) # very interesting anon, please explain further 25 KB JPG

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Anon is sad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/29/20(Sun)23:42:07 No.841230599 >Some stuff is just so innocent and pure that it breaks my heart knowing that it exists in such a cruel world 9 KB GIF
: Anonymous 11/29/20(Sun)23:42:07 No.841230599 >Some stuff is just so innocent and pure that it breaks my heart knowing that it exists in such a cruel world 9 KB GIF

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Anon Gets a Nice Surprise from the Past | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/22/19(Mon)19:13:12 No.798004600 >be me >changed schools and locations at least a dozen times in my life >old friend invites me to his party >never been to a party before >but I havent seen him in so long >f--- it Im going >expect that Im gonna be a social 8 KB JPG stigma and talk to nobody >oh well >arrive at party >"ANON!" >everyone happy as f--- to see me >hugs on top of hugs on top of hugs from people I havent seen in years >they all missed me >l always thought I was a social outcast >smoking pot, getting drunk >flirting with girls that I used to think were way out of my league >vibing like there is no tommorow >3 am, crossfaded out of my mind >pass out on friend's floor >people actually like me >people actually enjoy my presence >feelsgoodman
: Anonymous 04/22/19(Mon)19:13:12 No.798004600 >be me >changed schools and locations at least a dozen times in my life >old friend invites me to his party >never been to a party before >but I havent seen him in so long >f--- it Im going >expect that Im gonna be a social 8 KB JPG stigma and talk to nobody >oh well >arrive at party >"ANON!" >everyone happy as f--- to see me >hugs on top of hugs on top of hugs from people I havent seen in years >they all missed me >l always thought I was a social outcast >smoking pot, getting drunk >flirting with girls that I used to think were way out of my league >vibing like there is no tommorow >3 am, crossfaded out of my mind >pass out on friend's floor >people actually like me >people actually enjoy my presence >feelsgoodman

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Anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

>My political beliefs? Depends on who I'm trolling
>My political beliefs? Depends on who I'm trolling

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Anon impressed a girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/05/21(Thu)10:25:38 No.64845606 >new girl starts working at place i work JUST KILL ME NOW. >get set up to train her >force my sperghetti from falling out of my pockets the whole day >Ate mexican food for dinner last 210 KB PNG night >holding in bean fueled braps all day >finally get somewhere alone >let out seven second continuous fart >smells rancid >new girl walks by >sniff sniff >she genuinely gags >spots me >doesn't speak to me ever again : Anonymous 08/05/21(Thu)10:32:40 No.64845669 >>64845606 (OP) # I'm sorry OP, it's truly a horrible world where girls have to smell our greatest farts. 199 KB JPG
: Anonymous 08/05/21(Thu)10:25:38 No.64845606 >new girl starts working at place i work JUST KILL ME NOW. >get set up to train her >force my sperghetti from falling out of my pockets the whole day >Ate mexican food for dinner last 210 KB PNG night >holding in bean fueled braps all day >finally get somewhere alone >let out seven second continuous fart >smells rancid >new girl walks by >sniff sniff >she genuinely gags >spots me >doesn't speak to me ever again : Anonymous 08/05/21(Thu)10:32:40 No.64845669 >>64845606 (OP) # I'm sorry OP, it's truly a horrible world where girls have to smell our greatest farts. 199 KB JPG

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Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/05/21(Thu)21:08:52 No.860431228 >be me >Tim Hortons wage slave >working drive through >Chad McThundercock pulls up to the window >we were a little short staffed so it takes 193 KB PNG a little bit to get his food out to him >as he is waiting for his food he chuckles and says "You're new here right?" >awkwardly say “uh... um uh yes" >his grin is huge at this point >Coworker is finally done with his sandwich >give Chad his sandwich >Says, "Good luck buddy" Have jerked off to it for the last week and a half
: Anonymous 08/05/21(Thu)21:08:52 No.860431228 >be me >Tim Hortons wage slave >working drive through >Chad McThundercock pulls up to the window >we were a little short staffed so it takes 193 KB PNG a little bit to get his food out to him >as he is waiting for his food he chuckles and says "You're new here right?" >awkwardly say “uh... um uh yes" >his grin is huge at this point >Coworker is finally done with his sandwich >give Chad his sandwich >Says, "Good luck buddy" Have jerked off to it for the last week and a half

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Anon is a poet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous /fit/ Poetry Corner 07/24/21(Sat)20:26:33 No.62728875 a poem >There once was a surgeon named Keith >Who circumcised men with his teeth >'Twas not for leisure, or sexual 15 KB JPG pleasure >But to get at the cheese underneath thank you
: Anonymous /fit/ Poetry Corner 07/24/21(Sat)20:26:33 No.62728875 a poem >There once was a surgeon named Keith >Who circumcised men with his teeth >'Twas not for leisure, or sexual 15 KB JPG pleasure >But to get at the cheese underneath thank you

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