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Anon tries his new gun | /r/Greentext

IDS HABIDDING >be Serbian >buy a gun >notice some f----- riding around in his car with the TR NIKIm 307 KB JPG top down >he has the gayest mustache i've ever seen >empty mag of .32 into the f------ degenerate >Austrians are p----- for some reason >every nation in Europe is gearing up for war >just because i shot some h--- >millions of people die
IDS HABIDDING >be Serbian >buy a gun >notice some f----- riding around in his car with the TR NIKIm 307 KB JPG top down >he has the gayest mustache i've ever seen >empty mag of .32 into the f------ degenerate >Austrians are p----- for some reason >every nation in Europe is gearing up for war >just because i shot some h--- >millions of people die

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Anon has autism spectrum disorder | /r/Greentext


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Anon is getting urges | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/25/18(Sun)13:57:27 No.44135120 >straight boy >about 5'5 but I don't let it get to me >meet 6'5 guy at a camp that I work at >we have to move a bunch 229 KB PNG of boxes >l pick one up, trip and fall >"don't be such a silly little boy" >instant throbbing boner fuckfuckcfuck please don't be gay I don't want to be gay what does this mean 34 Replies / 5 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 03/25/18(Sun)13:57:27 No.44135120 >straight boy >about 5'5 but I don't let it get to me >meet 6'5 guy at a camp that I work at >we have to move a bunch 229 KB PNG of boxes >l pick one up, trip and fall >"don't be such a silly little boy" >instant throbbing boner fuckfuckcfuck please don't be gay I don't want to be gay what does this mean 34 Replies / 5 Images View Thread

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I AM DYING | /r/Greentext

>be me >have gf >like giving her oral >she likes it rough >she gets iud (built in birth control) no more period >me gusta.jpg 12 KB JPG >turn her into a Twinkie >every now and then she has period blood clumps >every now and then I get some in my mouth when I give her oral >don't care >spit it out >still sex >going rough one time >hammertime.jpg >heard girls like it when you give oral in the middle of sex >give oral >big clump falls out >so shocked >swallow >can't stop in the middle of sex >forget top throw up after >one week later she's crying >she says Anon I went to doc because I was 2 month pregnant but I lost the baby >she doesn't remember when >mfw I remember >mfw I ate mv kid
>be me >have gf >like giving her oral >she likes it rough >she gets iud (built in birth control) no more period >me gusta.jpg 12 KB JPG >turn her into a Twinkie >every now and then she has period blood clumps >every now and then I get some in my mouth when I give her oral >don't care >spit it out >still sex >going rough one time >hammertime.jpg >heard girls like it when you give oral in the middle of sex >give oral >big clump falls out >so shocked >swallow >can't stop in the middle of sex >forget top throw up after >one week later she's crying >she says Anon I went to doc because I was 2 month pregnant but I lost the baby >she doesn't remember when >mfw I remember >mfw I ate mv kid

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Anon has a best bro | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/29/19(Sun)21:47:04 No.817301715 >Mother got extremely sick on Christmas >She gets hospitalized >Doctor tell us she will be here until January 2 >I take care of my mother and I have to stay on the hospital every 195 KB PNG night taking care of her >Tell my girlfriend I have to cancel our plans for new year's party at a friend house because l'll be staying with my mom >She tells me she is still going without me >I think to myself "well I don't want her to have a s----- New Year so it's ok" >Later today best bro calls me >"hey buddy, I heard that you are staying at the hospital for new year, I canceled my plans and will bring you food to the hospital so we can celebrate"
: Anonymous 12/29/19(Sun)21:47:04 No.817301715 >Mother got extremely sick on Christmas >She gets hospitalized >Doctor tell us she will be here until January 2 >I take care of my mother and I have to stay on the hospital every 195 KB PNG night taking care of her >Tell my girlfriend I have to cancel our plans for new year's party at a friend house because l'll be staying with my mom >She tells me she is still going without me >I think to myself "well I don't want her to have a s----- New Year so it's ok" >Later today best bro calls me >"hey buddy, I heard that you are staying at the hospital for new year, I canceled my plans and will bring you food to the hospital so we can celebrate"

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Anon builds a house in minecraft | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/19(Sun)21:36:34 No.802981558 >Mom and dad are fighting >my dad starts packing his things in a plastic bag >He sees me playing minecraft >"Hey anon your Minecraft house need some greenery" >alright dad 27 KB PNG >dad leaves and drives away >l ask my mom where he went >"he's gone to stay somewhere else anon" >mfw >it's been 2 hours and l'm still crying : Anonymous 06/23/19(Sun)21:37:46 No.802981607 get your priorities straight. Fix up your s------- of a minecraft house for f---- sake. That's why he left. >>802981826 #
: Anonymous 06/23/19(Sun)21:36:34 No.802981558 >Mom and dad are fighting >my dad starts packing his things in a plastic bag >He sees me playing minecraft >"Hey anon your Minecraft house need some greenery" >alright dad 27 KB PNG >dad leaves and drives away >l ask my mom where he went >"he's gone to stay somewhere else anon" >mfw >it's been 2 hours and l'm still crying : Anonymous 06/23/19(Sun)21:37:46 No.802981607 get your priorities straight. Fix up your s------- of a minecraft house for f---- sake. That's why he left. >>802981826 #

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Anon likes Metallica | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/07/21(Sat) 17:17:57 No.9828889 >see man in metallica shirt >walk up to him >"do you like metallica" >"yeah?" >"cool." >walk away 20 KB JPG 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 08/07/21(Sat) 17:17:57 No.9828889 >see man in metallica shirt >walk up to him >"do you like metallica" >"yeah?" >"cool." >walk away 20 KB JPG 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon has a request | /r/Greentext

1551751881455.png 145 KB PNG Looking for a loli green text about a guy going on a road trip and gets his 12 year old sister to sit on his lap and he c--- his pants, anyone got it? : Anonymous 03/26/19(Tue)02:01:19 No.795905762 >>795905672(OP) # >be me >road trip with 12 year old sister >cummed in my pants >>795905885 # >>795907574 # : Anonymous 03/26/19(Tue)02:02:48 No.795905885 >>795905762 # that was it. thanks >>79590610 #
1551751881455.png 145 KB PNG Looking for a loli green text about a guy going on a road trip and gets his 12 year old sister to sit on his lap and he c--- his pants, anyone got it? : Anonymous 03/26/19(Tue)02:01:19 No.795905762 >>795905672(OP) # >be me >road trip with 12 year old sister >cummed in my pants >>795905885 # >>795907574 # : Anonymous 03/26/19(Tue)02:02:48 No.795905885 >>795905762 # that was it. thanks >>79590610 #

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Anon is Very Intelligent, I Envy this Level of Cunning | /r/Greentext

How about a /devilish/ thread? >At uni >Girl calls me a loser 63 KB JPG >over the line >Find her facebook >She has a boyfriend >Everything is public >Perfect >Save her pictures, learn her interests >Make an okcupid account >Fill it out with her info >Interact with others a little >Make a fake Chad facebook account >Message her boyfriend >"Hey bro sorry to bring this up but I was on okcupid and I do google searches of my dates, found your gf on it. Thought I should let you know." >bf messages me back "wow dude thanks for telling me." >A few days later check her facebook >Relationship: Single. Who is the loser now?
How about a /devilish/ thread? >At uni >Girl calls me a loser 63 KB JPG >over the line >Find her facebook >She has a boyfriend >Everything is public >Perfect >Save her pictures, learn her interests >Make an okcupid account >Fill it out with her info >Interact with others a little >Make a fake Chad facebook account >Message her boyfriend >"Hey bro sorry to bring this up but I was on okcupid and I do google searches of my dates, found your gf on it. Thought I should let you know." >bf messages me back "wow dude thanks for telling me." >A few days later check her facebook >Relationship: Single. Who is the loser now?

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Anon Gets Banned | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/08/19(Fri)11:48:18 No.792131303 >Be me >Redditfag >Post comment reply on r/greentext making joke about how I only f--- 3 year olds. >Open Reddit later 43 KB JPG >"Your account has been permanently suspended for sexual or suggestive content involving minors." >mfw Reddit now thinks I'm a registered sex offender. >mfw they think I had sex. >later virgins.
: Anonymous 02/08/19(Fri)11:48:18 No.792131303 >Be me >Redditfag >Post comment reply on r/greentext making joke about how I only f--- 3 year olds. >Open Reddit later 43 KB JPG >"Your account has been permanently suspended for sexual or suggestive content involving minors." >mfw Reddit now thinks I'm a registered sex offender. >mfw they think I had sex. >later virgins.

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Anon plays some uplink | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No.264820315 4 hours ago >>264820071 >playing some uplink >friend comes into my dorm >"hey what's good- H-------- WHAT ARE YOU DOING" >Man I'm hacking this school database to give this guy a masters degree so I can get f------ paid. >H-------- BRO WHAT >he actually pulled the power cord out of the wall >I turn to him and yell WHAT THE F--- | DIDN'T COVER MY TRACKS YET, THE FBI WILL F--- ME UP FOR THIS, AND NOW YOU'RE AN ACCOMPLICE!! >he ran out of my room screaming >l had a good 20 minute laugh
Anonymous No.264820315 4 hours ago >>264820071 >playing some uplink >friend comes into my dorm >"hey what's good- H-------- WHAT ARE YOU DOING" >Man I'm hacking this school database to give this guy a masters degree so I can get f------ paid. >H-------- BRO WHAT >he actually pulled the power cord out of the wall >I turn to him and yell WHAT THE F--- | DIDN'T COVER MY TRACKS YET, THE FBI WILL F--- ME UP FOR THIS, AND NOW YOU'RE AN ACCOMPLICE!! >he ran out of my room screaming >l had a good 20 minute laugh

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Anon checks out Reddit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/02/19(Thu)15:00:09 No.52228531 >Decide to check out reddit to see if its as bad as everyone says >Go to the r/AmltheAsshole subreddit > First Post I see is of a some bitch getting pregnant at 17 wanting a abortion, boyfriend pleading her to 23 KB JPG keep the child says he'll raise it <Child is born she starts saying 'I HAVE PTSD FROM iT' >Father raises child >ffw 12 years her daughter wants to meet her >Literally wants no contact >Straight up rejects her own child >Everyone cheering her on >Any people who disagree get downvoted into oblivion What the f---? 22 Replies / 2 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 05/02/19(Thu)15:00:09 No.52228531 >Decide to check out reddit to see if its as bad as everyone says >Go to the r/AmltheAsshole subreddit > First Post I see is of a some bitch getting pregnant at 17 wanting a abortion, boyfriend pleading her to 23 KB JPG keep the child says he'll raise it <Child is born she starts saying 'I HAVE PTSD FROM iT' >Father raises child >ffw 12 years her daughter wants to meet her >Literally wants no contact >Straight up rejects her own child >Everyone cheering her on >Any people who disagree get downvoted into oblivion What the f---? 22 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Anon is friends with a cow | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/02/21(Mon)21:38:17 No.3883316 >Moo at a cow >lt moos back We are friends 101 KB PNG
: Anonymous 08/02/21(Mon)21:38:17 No.3883316 >Moo at a cow >lt moos back We are friends 101 KB PNG

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Anon schizo meltdown incoming | /r/Greentext

01/23/17(Mon)15:03:12 No.34365965 Im 30 now, the experiment has officially come to an end. Ever since i was twenty and got my own place, i have not seen a picture or reflection of myself. I took all mirrors and most refective 253 KB JPG surfaces out of my home. I have not taken a picture of myself in almost 11 years now. And it worked. I have forgotten what i look like more or less. All i know is i have brown hair(because i cur my own hair to avoid the haircutter mirrors) and my general body type. I have no memory of what my face looks like anymore. I am going to look into the mirror for the first time in a decade tomorrow. I wonder what i'll see. АМА.
01/23/17(Mon)15:03:12 No.34365965 Im 30 now, the experiment has officially come to an end. Ever since i was twenty and got my own place, i have not seen a picture or reflection of myself. I took all mirrors and most refective 253 KB JPG surfaces out of my home. I have not taken a picture of myself in almost 11 years now. And it worked. I have forgotten what i look like more or less. All i know is i have brown hair(because i cur my own hair to avoid the haircutter mirrors) and my general body type. I have no memory of what my face looks like anymore. I am going to look into the mirror for the first time in a decade tomorrow. I wonder what i'll see. АМА.

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Anon's dog hates him | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/10/19(Wed)23:49:12 No.51880974 >lay down next to doggy >pet doggy >doggy gets uncomfortable, walks away, and lays down somewhere else 34 KB PNG
: Anonymous 04/10/19(Wed)23:49:12 No.51880974 >lay down next to doggy >pet doggy >doggy gets uncomfortable, walks away, and lays down somewhere else 34 KB PNG

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Anon is done with the world | /r/Greentext


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Anon Got Faked Out | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)17:52:22 No.42473733 Why didn't you confess your love to your crush during the missile alert? Saturday. January 13 Emergeny Aet BALLSTIC ME TEAT OUND TO HANE SECK MMEDIATE SHLTER THIS NOT A DRL What did you have to lose? 71 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)18:02:53 No.42473933 >>42473733 (OP) # >did this >she actually said yes >feel amazing >feel even more amazing once I find out that the alert wasn't 15 KB JPG actually real and I'll get to keep living, with her by my side >she texts back shortly after, saying that she doesn't actually like me and only said yes because she thought we were about to die and she wanted me to be happy in my final moments F--- this s---. I wish I was nuked.
: Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)17:52:22 No.42473733 Why didn't you confess your love to your crush during the missile alert? Saturday. January 13 Emergeny Aet BALLSTIC ME TEAT OUND TO HANE SECK MMEDIATE SHLTER THIS NOT A DRL What did you have to lose? 71 KB JPG : Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)18:02:53 No.42473933 >>42473733 (OP) # >did this >she actually said yes >feel amazing >feel even more amazing once I find out that the alert wasn't 15 KB JPG actually real and I'll get to keep living, with her by my side >she texts back shortly after, saying that she doesn't actually like me and only said yes because she thought we were about to die and she wanted me to be happy in my final moments F--- this s---. I wish I was nuked.

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Finish Her Anon! | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/08/15(Sun)16:01:22 No.597173468 >be me >be in college >sharing flat with a mate >pretty cool guy, just as averse to cleaning the kitchen as I am >therefore, good chemistry, nobody complains >College is in a small town >only two bars in the entire place >anyway, get lucky one night >haul a wasted 7/10 home from the pub >shes quirky, but fun >sex goes on for almost half an hour >feelsgreatman.avi >about to blow my load in her >yells, at the top of my lungs: MORTAAAL KОМВАAAAT! >Hear bro yelling from the other side of the wall FINISH HÉR! >blow load as she laughed like a lunatic. Ended up dating her for a year before she split. Still miss her. Replies: >>597173829>>597174017
Anonymous 02/08/15(Sun)16:01:22 No.597173468 >be me >be in college >sharing flat with a mate >pretty cool guy, just as averse to cleaning the kitchen as I am >therefore, good chemistry, nobody complains >College is in a small town >only two bars in the entire place >anyway, get lucky one night >haul a wasted 7/10 home from the pub >shes quirky, but fun >sex goes on for almost half an hour >feelsgreatman.avi >about to blow my load in her >yells, at the top of my lungs: MORTAAAL KОМВАAAAT! >Hear bro yelling from the other side of the wall FINISH HÉR! >blow load as she laughed like a lunatic. Ended up dating her for a year before she split. Still miss her. Replies: >>597173829>>597174017

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Anon has a point | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Igenderequality/ 09/17/18(Mon)05:58:34 No.48178550 >be me >suck a d--- >gets called a f----- >girl sucks multiple d---- >not a f----- >mfw 72 KB JPG View Thread
: Anonymous Igenderequality/ 09/17/18(Mon)05:58:34 No.48178550 >be me >suck a d--- >gets called a f----- >girl sucks multiple d---- >not a f----- >mfw 72 KB JPG View Thread

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Anon is a Puppet Master | /r/Greentext

>download Sims 4 >play it for an hour >total boredom >download the sex mod and a hundred animations with enhanced nipple and bush overhaul >start a family >dad with hot milf wife >son is your average shy pretty boy f------ >step-daughter is a naughty petite spinner >son hooks up with his step-sister >but also scores his step-mom >while the dad starts f------ his step- daughter >son knocks up step-mom >dad knocks up step-daughter >son and dad cucked each other >raise each other kids this game is fun
>download Sims 4 >play it for an hour >total boredom >download the sex mod and a hundred animations with enhanced nipple and bush overhaul >start a family >dad with hot milf wife >son is your average shy pretty boy f------ >step-daughter is a naughty petite spinner >son hooks up with his step-sister >but also scores his step-mom >while the dad starts f------ his step- daughter >son knocks up step-mom >dad knocks up step-daughter >son and dad cucked each other >raise each other kids this game is fun

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